Page 33 of Ropers Can’t Tie Knots (Kissing Ridge Cowboys #3)

twenty

Hunter

I can’t say I’m happy to be sitting in the lawyer’s office today.

I want to remain positive, but I have my doubts this visit will bring good news.

The door to his office opens, and Mason Caldwell strides in with a tight smile on his face.

“Hunter.” He nods. “Thank you for coming on such short notice.”

“Well, your voicemail didn’t leave me any choice, Caldwell. Please tell me this isn’t as bad as it is in my head.”

How am I going to break any kind of bad news to Gabe?

“Hopefully not.” He fidgets with the pen, and I notice a bead of sweat on his brow. “The last payment of the residual trust can’t be made if we continue to file the divorce. I should’ve told you earlier, but I was…afraid you’d still follow through with your threat.”

I feel like a total asshole for making him sweat, literally, like this. But I thought we had a good conversation last time, and he understood I’d never out him like that. Essentially, I called my bluff to ease his mind.

“Listen, Caldwell…I was out of line to threaten you like that, and I’m sorry for being the source of that stress.

” he nods and darts his gaze to the desk.

“I promised I wouldn’t make it public, an d I meant it.

I was just…fucking angry, okay? Living under my grandfather’s thumb and being his yes man for so long, I just…

fuck…I just wanted to be done with it all.

” Heaving a breath, resigned that this won’t be as smooth as I hoped, I can only offer my regrets. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too, but thank you for that. Your grandfather paid me well, and part of this is my fault.”

“I know how he was. You don’t have to explain. So what happens now?”

Caldwell attempts a smile and opens the folder he carried in.

“You have options. You can stay married and receive the last payment according to the trust stipulations, or you can continue with the divorce, and the funds go to the anti-LGBTQ+ organization he named. I should have called you earlier to let you know I delayed filing the divorce, but I hoped I could try to sneak it by the partners.”

“I don’t want that sorry excuse for a charity to get a dime. That’s not an option, Caldwell.” Running a hand through my hair, I huff a breath. Gabe is going to hate this. I made him sign those papers and break his heart, and it was all for nothing. God, I’m an asshole.

“You can still divorce after a year and remarry,” he offers.

“I know, but…”

It’s the most logical thing to do, and I went into this with such a bull attitude, determined to do this in my way because it was always his way or nothing. Foolishly, I hoped this would go my way for once.

Caldwell clears his throat. “Forgive me for offering an opinion, but giving money to that organization would bury people like me for even longer. If they gain enough ground, even your marriage could be void.”

Stark truth, and I know it. I’m just disappointed in myself that I’ve hurt the person I care about most because of my stubbornness.

“Yeah. I’m fairly certain the divorce will wait, but I need to speak to Gabe.”

Caldwell nods in understanding. “When’s the wedding?” he asks.

Thinking of marrying Gabe the way we want always brings a smile to my lips.

“June first at the ranch.” Caldwell smiles, and I recognize that sadness in his eyes.

“You should join us. Nobody needs to know, Caldwell. I invited you because you helped, or for some other reason I can think of. You’ll be welcome. ”

“Can I think about it?”

“Absolutely.” Standing, I offer my hand to him. “I know we met under shitty circumstances and both of us did some not great things, but…I’m willing to get past that if you are.”

He takes my offered handshake with a squeeze. “We should support each other and not fight. You give me courage, Hunter. Thank you.”

I know he means it, and he’s not a bad guy. If I get the chance to start my life over, shouldn’t everyone?

“I’ll call you after I speak to Gabe.”

After leaving the law office, I head straight to Gabe’s office.

There’s no way this can wait until he’s home.

After parking on the street, I walk the block up to his office.

It’s a tiny wartime house nestled among all the modern business buildings, clothing stores, and boutiques.

Even on a street with newer buildings, it fits in. Kind of like Gabe when he moved here .

There was a rough start as he tried to find a place, but much like his office, he’s here to stay.

My attention catches on something in one of the store windows and, I immediately head inside. A little extra grovelling won’t hurt, right?

With my purchase tucked into a cute little bag, if you’re into that kind of thing, and I know Gabe is, I finally arrive at his office.

“Hi Penny. I don’t have an appointment, but I hope Gabe is free?”

“Hi Hunter! Oh gosh, I’m sure he has time for you. He’s just on a phone call, but I’ll let him know you’re here.”

“Thanks.”

Gabe’s office isn’t sterile, like the previous lawyer kept it.

Over the past several months, he’s modelled his waiting room like a living room with a matching sofa and love seat.

Art on the wall is by local photographers I’m familiar with.

One is a herd of Mr. Bruce’s dairy cows. I’d know that barn anywhere.

A small plaque sits on a corner table, and I bend to read it.

‘Thank you for supporting our 4-H club.’

That’s my man.

It’s nothing fancy, but it warms my insides to know he keeps attending 4-H meetings without me and providing the snacks if Margie is too busy. To think he was worried about fitting in here when he came. He’s had no issue winning hearts in this town.

“This is a nice surprise.” Gabe’s voice has me turn around, and a smile fills my face even though it’s not good news that brings me here. He steps over and we kiss softly before he motions to his office. “I have to leave for a farm visit shortly, so you caught me at the right time. ”

After stepping into his office, my hands suddenly feel too slick and my gift perhaps not enough of an apology.

“Hunter? Is something wrong?”

“I fucked up,” I blurt, and Gabe freezes. “I didn’t cheat or anything.”

Gabe nods slowly. “That’s…comforting. What, ah, did you do then?”

“We can’t get divorced.” Gabe’s brow furrows, and I inhale a breath so I can deliver this to him better. “I had a call from Caldwell, and someone at his office picked up on the divorce, and he didn’t file it because it —”

“Hunter, slow down. Actually, do you need to sit? You look pale.”

Gabe’s concern for me twists my insides, the guilt heavier than when Caldwell delivered the news.

“Babe…I made you sign divorce papers for nothing. It’s not happening, and I’m so sorry I put you through that.”

Gabe sits for a moment and says nothing. After a moment, he whispers, “So we’re still married now? That won’t end?”

“No. Not unless you want to. But then we’d have to push the wedding back longer because—”

“Hunter.” Gabe grabs my chin and forces me to look at him.

I’d avoided eye contact because I hate seeing his heartbreak, but he’s not even sad.

“I know you wanted our own day and to cut those ties, but we can still do that. Don’t you get that?

We aren’t changing a thing except for a number on the calendar. ”

“You’re not mad?”

“How can I be mad when I’m still your husband and I get to relive a day of making you my husband all over? We celebrate what’s coming. June first is our wedding day, whether the marriage is filed on that day or not. That’s the day we celebrate.”

“I’m sorry I made you hurt, Gabe. I should’ve just paused and let this play out instead of continuing to fight a dead man, but I just wanted this to be all my own.”

Gabe’s gaze softens as he steps closer.

“I’m sorry, too, but I’m still in love with you and still want a wedding with hot dogs and horses and friends.” He hooks his fingers into my belt loops. “I still want you. In any way I can have you.”

Gabe kisses me with the same love and passion I feel every time, and I squish my eyes closed at the swamp of emotion. “Sometimes I think I don’t deserve you. I’ve fucked up so many times and you’re still here.”

“Funny, I think the same thing about you.”

Remembering the bag in my hand, I step back and push it into his chest. “I got this for you.”

Gabe’s smile is genuine as he takes the bag and sits on his desk. The pretty tissue paper lays carefully on the desk and he peeks inside the bag before gently taking the box out.

“Hunter…this is…” Gabe laughs and beams a smile. “You know I don’t practice this kind of law, though, right?”

He holds the mug I bought on the spur of the moment because I didn’t want to show up empty-handed with the news we weren’t divorced and relive the day I broke his heart.

Printed on a white mug in black letters is the phrase, ‘ I put the cute in prosecute. ’ It’s nothing fancy, but I thought it would make him laugh, and I was right.

“Yeah, I know that’s not what you do, but you are cute. ”

His cheeks flush as he sets the mug on his desk and leans his hip on the edge. “Thank you. For the compliment and the sweet gift. I love it.”

“So we’re good, counsellor?”

“Yeah, doll. More than good.” Gabe’s alarm on his computer chimes as I reach for him. “That’s my warning to get over to my next client. Do you have plans tonight?”

“Hopefully with you?” I ask and place a kiss on his neck.

“I’ll bring home takeout and see if Diamond has any of the cheesecake you like.” He breathes against my lips before we share a soft kiss, and I step away.

“It’s a date, counsellor. See you tonight.”

After one more kiss and a wave to Penny, I’m back on the street, heading to my truck. One more stop to make before home. It’s not one I want to make, but it’s long overdue.

After the cemetery caretaker finishes and drives off, I exit my truck and walk lightly to the stone I’ve come here to visit.

It’s a small cemetery and only four people I know and love spend their eternity here. Side by side, it’s an easy visit to make. Stopping at my parents’ first, I read their names and young ages before the familiar sadness creeps in.

Would I have played sports with my dad? How would they have reacted to knowing I was gay? Would my relationship with my grandfather have been different if they hadn’t died?

None of the questions matter, really, but they bounce back every time I come to visit my grandmother’s grave. A step to the left and I’m in front of the woman who raised me as best she could until she, too, was taken far too soon for this world.

“You would love Gabe, Gram. He’d laugh at all your jokes, I have no doubt.” The lump catches in my throat as it always does. But it’s not Gram that I need to talk to today.

I’ve not been here since they buried my grandfather next to my cherished gram that day.

It wasn’t even grief I felt that particularly sunny morning.

It was something complicated and mixed up with hate and rage that set me on a path of self-destruction for several days before Jackson stepped in and told me it was time to settle down and let it go.

But sometimes things can’t just remain unsaid. Even to the dead.

“Jeremiah, you almost won, you know. Once again, I took your bait and jumped through all your hoops like the trick pony you turned me into.” A dry laugh bubbles out as I stare at his name engraved on the granite stone.

“I get the last word, though. I bet you thought I’d walk away from all the money and be too scared to see any kind of relationship through.

I know you thought I was worthless, but guess what? I’m not.”

Heaving a breath, I pace between the two stones as the words that have sat unspoken for far too many years come flying out.

“I did everything I could to keep the ranch because I thought you didn’t want me to have it.

Then found out you sort of did, but you had to make me work for it.

You could never just let me have a single win or anything easy.

Most people would say that builds strength, but that only works when there’s love with it.

You never showed me love!” My shout feels out of place here, like I’m disrespecting the rest of the others, and I bring my voice back down.

“When Gram died, so did any ounce of compassion you had. I lost the breeding stock to keep the ranch. Funny how the one thing I stood up for, having my name on that business, was the one thing that kept me afloat until this mess you crafted was settled.”

Resigned, I kneel in front of Jeremiah Burke’s headstone and say words I never thought I’d ever say to the man.

“In the end, though, I have to thank you, Jeremiah. I bet you thought marriage would scare me off and make me walk away from the money so it could feed your dislike for people like me. But you underestimated me, and you gave me a gift worth far more than your money. It didn’t start out that way, but Gabe became my husband because of you.

He’s patient and kind, smart as all get out, and he’s learning to ride.

Mack loves him. He has the cutest little smile when he’s trying to push my buttons. ”

Huffing a breath and wiping at the wetness in my eyes, I continue because this notion that my grandmother is listening takes hold.

“You didn’t need to make both of us miserable because she died, you know.

We could have helped each other.” I think I might be crying for the old bastard, and I’m not sure what that means.

Or maybe I’m crying from relief that I’ve unloaded this to deaf ears.

“I’m sorry you couldn’t get over losing people in your life, Jeremiah.

I really am. Because I know how it felt, too, and I’m not walking that road anymore. ”

Pushing to stand, I feel lighter as I listen to the birds singing in the trees and mull over the words I just said. The one person in the world I despised pushed me together with the love of my life. Maybe it’s more complicated, or maybe it’s just that simple, but it still happened because of him.

“Thanks, Granddad. I wish our story could have ended differently, but it’s not too late for me to write a better ending for myself.”

With a last nod, I return to my truck and sit in silence a little longer. I feel like I should never forgive him for all he put me through, but a peace sits with me now, and I can’t deny I feel lighter for it.

This must be the part people talk about, where you feel free after finally letting go.

Putting my truck into gear, I back out of the tiny lot without a final glance.

I’m definitely free, but maybe I should thank Gabe for that.