Page 11 of Ronan

I’m barely home for five minutes before I get a text that shakes me a little.

Nightbreed : You should really get your porch light fixed. Don’t shower tonight, I’ll know if you do.

He followed me home, which means he knows where I live.

As amazing as our rendezvous was, I’m starting to understand the danger I’m in.

I don’t know anything about him. He’s proving over and over again that he’s not afraid to cross normal societal boundaries — like stalking someone — and I’m over here wagging my tail like a dog in heat, giving him the impression I’m totally fine with it .

I can’t even blame him for thinking it.

But after the intensity of what we just did and the looming fear that he might try to make my fantasy come true tonight when I’m not expecting it, I decide it’s not a good idea to stay home alone.

Emma’s not here and her overnight bag is gone, meaning she’s at Orion’s again, and that doesn’t leave me with many options.

What will my brother say if I show up? What will he say if I tell him why I’m showing up?

Fuck.

I don’t have a choice. I peek out my living room window to make sure there aren’t any cars in the parking lot I don’t recognize and no gorgeous motorcycles there either, then head over to Ronan’s.

My heart is in my throat as I knock.

The door swings open so fast I flinch, and my step-brother looks like he just got out of the shower.

He’s still covered from head to toe with a navy blue crewneck that matches his pants, but his hair is still wet and matted to his head.

I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen him look so comfortable or is it.

.. relaxed? Too bad it’s gone the second he realizes it’s me at his door and the fact that I probably don’t look okay .

“What’s wrong?”

He steps onto the porch to search for danger behind me, but finds none.

“Look, can I just come in without you asking too many questions? I know that’s not fair of me, but I just... I don’t want to be alone right now and I don’t have anywhere else to go.”

With a frown, he reaches out to grip my arm and tugs me inside his house, the space dark until he flicks on the living room light. “What can you tell me?”

He’s gonna pick now of all times to go into feral older brother mode? Of course he is.

If I tell him the truth, he’ll judge me and probably start threatening Nightbreed.

I don’t want that. I don’t know exactly what’s going on or what my masked little deviant is going to do with the knowledge of where I live, but I still trust him.

I can’t explain why, but I do. I’m also not ready to stop yet.

“That I’m fine, I’m not hurt, and nothing happened that I didn’t beg for. It was just kind of intense and since I’m not allowed to know who he is, we can’t exactly go out for burgers and milkshakes after. ”

Ronan stiffens when the words I didn’t say out loud sink in. “Oh. Are you... dropping?”

His jaw tenses so tightly I know I’d hear his teeth scraping together if he was close enough, but by now he’s moved closer to the kitchen and I’m still near the front door.

“I guess.” It seems like a rough way to put it, but there’s a ball of tension in my chest that wasn’t there earlier.

“I’m not asking you to do anything for me but hang out with me.

I’m sorry to just intrude without calling, I’ll buy you dinner to make up for it.

” I want to tell him that Nightbreed has my address now and I’m a little afraid to go home, but I don’t.

I have to hope he’ll let me stay anyway. “Did you have plans?”

“No, I didn’t sleep good last night so I was just going to stay in.” He grabs me a water and closes the distance to hand it to me, his eyes locking on the dark mark on my neck, but he says nothing about it. “You can stay here.”

The tension eases a little as I take the bottle of Smart Water and shake my head. It couldn’t have been any other brand, huh? “Thanks. Are you craving anything? ”

He hides a smirk behind his hand and shrugs. “You still love that pizza joint over on 5th?”

“Of course. Their buffalo chicken rolls are better than sex.” I pause, thinking about everything I just did. “Well... better than most sex.”

Eyeing me suspiciously, Ronan pulls out his phone to order the food with his bottom lip between his teeth, but I’m happy he doesn’t ask me to elaborate. “Ordered. And you’re not going to pay, what kind of big brother would that make me?”

“The kind who is having his night ruined by his annoying, smelly little sister,” I laugh, regretting not showering before I came over. Sitting on his couch right now would feel like some sort of sexual vandalism. “Thank you, though. I’m glad you were home.”

“You smell good, what do you mean?”

My eyebrows shoot up. “Really? Because I just got fucked raw in a truck stop bathroom.”

Dark blue eyes lock on mine, his jaw slack for the briefest of moments, but he blinks the shock away. “Raw? In a truck stop bathroom? ”

My cheeks heat up, but his reaction was hilarious. “Yep. I should probably take a shower before I sit... anywhere.”

He’s tense as hell, but I swear there’s a wild glint in his eyes. “Did you bring clothes?”

Opening my mouth to say yes, I realize with a jolt that I was so thrown by Nightbreed’s text that I didn’t grab anything at all. “No. I can run back home though and probably just shower there.”

“Nah,” he rushes out, his voice making me do a double take. “You can use mine.”

My stomach twists at the thought. “Are you sure? I’m really failing at this whole ‘don’t be a burden’ thing.”

If I wasn’t staring at him unblinkingly, I would have missed the way his eyes travel all the way up my frame. “You’re never a burden. Never have been. I’ll get you one of my shirts and some socks.”

He’s down the hallway before I realize underwear was not one of the things he listed, and I don’t know what the fuck to do about that.

I’ve already asked for too much, so I don’t say a word when he comes back with a towel, a washcloth, a light grey tee and a pair of black socks.

I’ll just... put the ones I’m wearing back on .

It’s a good idea in theory, but as I take them off, I realize I’d rather light myself on fire than put them back on — so I’ll just have to hope that Ronan’s shirt is big enough to keep me covered. And if it’s not... well, I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.

His shower is pretty well stocked so I’m not too worried about finding what I need, but not having a hairbrush is going to be a problem.

I’m hopeful there might be one under his sink, maybe from a past girlfriend or maybe one Emma left here one night, but as I open the vanity doors I see nothing but extra tubes of deodorant, two bottles of cologne, and some cotton swabs.

Curiosity gets the better of me and I sniff the first bottle, recognizing it immediately as Ronan’s signature scent. It makes me smile to myself until I pick up the second bottle, one that looks brand new, and nearly drop it all over the grey tile flooring.

It’s the same scent Nightbreed wears. I recognize it from both the shirt he sent me, my memories from earlier, and the faint scent of it still on my skin.

What the fuck are the odds? A wild, deranged part of my brain is screaming that Nightbreed is Ronan, Ronan is Nightbreed. The cologne, the hair, the eyebrows, the voice, the height... they’re fucking doppelg?ngers if they’re not the same person.

But the more rational part of my brain reminds me that Nightbreed knows my name, he’s seen my face. There’s no way Ronan wouldn’t have hung up immediately if he realized it was me, and less than no chance he’d have fucked me. I’ve subtly hit on him enough that if he was interested, I’d know.

So these things are just coincidences, and I need to take an ice cold shower before my imagination gets the better of me.

I’ve already done one stupid thing today.