Page 31

“I screwed up. He left me,” I admit, wiping my tears off and trying to compose myself.

My dad shakes his head, and my mom smiles at me comfortingly.

“So, is he as horrible as everyone thinks?” she asks innocently, completely unaware she is hitting a nerve with this question.

I get a big breath in and then let it out with a deep sigh.

“Honestly, it would be easier if he was. I could have hated him then.”

I used to hate him. I vividly remember hating him so much the day I met him that I could barely contain myself. That hate started everything…

“Oh, are you in love already?” Mom asks, and this time, Dad is giving her a scolding look.

I chuckle at them. “We’ve known each other for a week.”

“So, are you?” she grins at me, and I half expect her to raise her brows up and down a couple of times knowingly.

“Mom—”

She gazes at me so intensely that I shoot my hands to the sides and cry, “I don’t know!”.

“But he’s your mate,” she acknowledges by some miracle—I’ve never told anyone.

She sends a weird look to my dad, who stands by the bed with his arms crossed and a sour face. He’s displeased with me .

As if being a Rogue Prince’s mate wasn’t on Moon Goddess’s list of screw-ups, but on mine.

Well, screwing up the alliance is on mine, and that’s probably why he’s angry with me.

“How did you know?” I ask my mom, curious about what exactly betrayed the existence of our mate bond. Maybe I could fix that in the future.

“You just told me with your question. But I had my suspicions after that story about you fighting his wolf in human form. I mean, I know you, and I heard about him enough to—” She stops mid-sentence as if she’s looking for the right words, then shakes her head and tries to approach the topic differently, “The way you interact with each other… you have to be well-paired to pull off this whole arranged marriage thing so well, so quickly. And who is better at matching two werewolves together than the Moon Goddess?”

I cross my arms just like my dad does, regretting letting her trick me into admitting the truth when she didn’t have solid proof. Such a beginner’s mistake.

“You know I adapt easily if I want to,” I answer finally.

“That’s true, but it’s not what’s happening here, is it?” she doesn’t let it go.

I sigh again and start pacing the room.

“No, it’s not,” I admit, ready to seek some guidance. I was always smart enough to know when to ask for help and that is now. “It’s a mess. I’m so scared of everything, I can’t even properly do my job with the alliance. I’m constantly second-guessing myself. I mean, I don’t want to get killed, and that’s what he’ll do the second he discovers who I am to him. Right?”

Dad gives a quick nod.

It's also time to admit to myself, that I was not mentally prepared to meet my mate in these fucked up circumstances, under all that pressure of the Kingdom’s safety.

And I certainly was not prepared to fall for him with real attraction and real feelings so quickly. Him!

How could I fall in love with the Rogue Prince at all ?

No, it’s not love; it’s just lust. It must be lust. Definitely.

My parents are silent, engrossed in thought, just like me, until my mom clears her throat. “I mean… you are his mate, and he clearly likes you, so maybe you shouldn’t cross out anything yet.”

My blood boils at this unhelpful school-crush level of counsel.

“He is the fucking Rogue Prince. He is ruthless, scary, inhuman, and I have zero control over anything there—”

“Don’t think I didn’t see how you stopped him from harming Ella,” my dad interrupts me with piercing eyes.

I scoff. Of course I did, it’s Ella, and it was not a problem to simply put a hand over his.

“He is just a normal human being…” I pause, with the sudden realization I was tricked again. “Oh. I see what you did there. Smart.”

They are a good match.

“Exactly, he is a human being. He’s not a God.” My dad smirks at me and comes closer to hug me. He is almost as tall as Cain, so I lean my head on his chest as he pats my pink hair. “You can do this even if it’s scary. We knew it wouldn’t be easy. I mean, the whole mate thing is an unforeseen problem, I admit, but—”

“Maybe it’s not a problem at all. Maybe it’s a blessing,” my mom chirps in, earning our condescending looks.

She always was too romantic for her own good.

“What?” she shrugs her shoulders, “I think you can even be happy. Even if you could reject the mate bond to feel safer around him, your characters remain the same. And if I’m right, and I always am, you are very compatible, so—”

“Is this why you were into war so much?” My dad suddenly interrupts her as if he wasn’t interested in her opinion at all .

But I know it’s not the case. He is interested. He just doesn’t need to hear it because he already knows what she thinks. They always interrupt each other, it’s like their thing!

I shake my head and free myself from his embrace.

“Don’t shake your head at me. It is possible, deep down, your wolf always knew your mate was on the other side of the border.”

I tilt my head to the side and purse my lips. He’s too soaked in my mom’s romantic ideas to realize how ridiculous it sounds. Our wolves are the most primal parts of ourselves, but they are not some mystical other beings trapped in our heads. They are just… us.

“Can we normalize girls liking military stuff without a crush on a boy?” I lift my brows at him unamused.

“Well… I thought it would be a quick way for you to meet all the alphas and betas, without the need to invite everyone for a mating ball. You know I hate those. That was why I let you pursue this hobby of yours,” he admits shamelessly, in a tone that makes me wish he was joking.

My mom chuckles, so I glance at her. That’s when I notice she is staring at the floor blankly.

“Blair?” My dad touches her shoulder delicately. She looks up at us with a grin.

“I just remembered how you were always rooting for Voldemort,” she chuckles again.

“I wasn’t rooting for him. I could just understand where he was coming from,” I roll my eyes.

“I wonder what was first,” she goes back to staring blankly, this time at the window. “Are you the way you are because you were given to him, or was he given to you because of the way you already are? Huh. Either way, it’s clear you are perfect for each other, even if you could reject him.”

This is the second time she has mentioned rejection this morning.

“Did you know you can do that? Reject, I mean.”

Both of my parents nod at my question.

“We heard legends, but everything we ever had, all the books on how to do that, were burned by the Rogues centuries ago. And it’s not like it was ever common knowledge, because who needs that anyway, so no one knows how to do that anymore,” says my dad.

“Could they just be stolen? Not burned?”

“No. Well, I guess, maybe, why?”

“Rogues seem to know how to do that. I know Cain’s Gamma successfully rejected his mate, Claudia—"

“Wait, he has a Gamma? As in third in command?” My dad inquires with sudden interest.

“They were more prepared than we thought. Dad, I think they would… win. Soon.”

“Then why would they come up with all of this?”

“Access to the university. Education. Just winning wouldn’t actually improve their lives.” Omitting that I am sure there are other hidden motives feels like lying.

“Hmm. Maybe.” He must have his own suspicions. “But Gamma?”

“And Delta. And a fuckload of alpha-blooded officers, but that we knew already.”

“Delta?! What are they, college sorority?!”

“That’s exactly what I said!” I laugh, “Well, I didn’t say it out loud because Cain has his sword… but I thought that.”

I notice that the sword I gave him from the second-floor wall is lying by his side of the bed, and my mood goes down immediately.

I can't believe he just left me here like that.

“Are you sure they know how to do that?” my mom asks, skeptically .

“Mhm,” I nod.

“Okay, in that case, I have to say it again. I think you could be happy with this arranged marriage without the mate bond,” Mom insists. “Hey, don’t you roll your eyes at me, you two! Asher, you and Cain get along well in all areas, and this room reeks of sex, by the way, so I do mean all areas—”

“Mom!” I haven’t been as embarrassed as I am right now, in my whole life!

My dad laughs at me.

“Anyway, you must admit, if not for a mate bond, you would not only rock this alliance—but could also be happy with him in your own weird way,” Mom adds.

“But there is a mate bond, and he does plan to kill me. He just doesn’t know that it’s me yet. Do you think I should reject him?”

As far as I know, it is not something normal to do, even among rogues. Especially if you are the one feeling the bond and the pain of forceful rejection, that’s why I haven’t considered it yet. But it does start to sound like a smart option in my situation.

“Oh, no, no, my child. I just said it in theory. I think you should make him realize being mated is not a weakness, but a strength. I think you should embrace loving him and him loving you. I think you are perfect mates, and it’s amazing how fate works. You would meet at some point anyway! Moon Goddess must have some big plans for you two. Maybe unite all werewolves once and for all. You should never reject a blessing like that.”

Well, that is not helpful at all.

I scoff and throw myself onto the unmade bed.

“Is it true that you broke his wolf’s jaw with your bare hands?”

My dad always asks important questions.

“Yes, but I was never that scared in my entire life. He was hunting me through the forest, and when he finally caught me, I couldn’t even properly defend myself because of the mate bond. I was unwillingly shifted back to human form, with his sharp venom-dripping teeth right in front of my face. But what was truly mortifying was the crippling awareness, after his jaw snapped, that I couldn’t possibly run away from him. I had to pull myself together and help him set it back! Oh, my Goddess, I thought I would have a heart attack.”

“Werewolves don’t have heart attacks,” my dad shares his medical knowledge, unhelpfully.

Just like I would. We were always very similar.

“Try setting back bloody Rogue Prince’s jaw after snapping it yourself, and then we’ll talk,” I scoff at him.

“Either way, I’m proud of you. You are a strong wolf, even in human form.”

I’m pretty sure it’s the first time he said these words out loud, but I don’t acknowledge that, just in case he takes it back.

“You should see how many bones I broke when Cain let his beta and generals assault me in front of the whole pack.”

“What?” Mom screeches, and I know it hit her personally, as a Luna of all werewolves whose safety should lay in the love of all of them.

I know, because even being stripped of that before it could begin was quite terrifying.

“Relax,” Dad calms her down in a way that never works, “It was just a trial, a test for being a Luna.”

“What?!” This time, I squeak.

“Well, when he mentioned at the family dinner, the tradition of testing if their mates are strong enough for the privilege to bear their pups, it did ring a bell. So I spent yesterday night digging up some ancient werewolf traditions—”

“You know your dad and his hobbies!”

“Anyway, in one of the texts, I found a mention of future Lunas being tested for strength in front of their new packs. ”

I look at him dumbfounded, wondering why no one ever mentioned anything interesting like this in the history class. Instead, I had to remember some stupid war dates, as if I couldn’t Google it any time I needed to.

Shit. I can’t anymore.

“I miss access to the internet.”

“I thought about that. I mean, a week or two of no contact is fine, invigorating even, but more? I don’t like it,” Mom says and gets up.

“I’ll make it work,” I promise with determination, even if it means I have to break into Cain's office to use his laptop unauthorized.

“So, are you going back to him?”

“Do I have a choice?” I ask. “The alliance—"

“He rode off on his bike, just after he told us you are not getting a divorce, leaving you safe at your parents' house. If you ask me, he gave you an easy way out,” Dad states calmly, and then, to my horror, his eyes dart to the box of condoms. “And I can see that you are not working at the heir part of the alliance yet, so maybe you can stay here for a couple of years. You can even look after everything regarding the pact on our side when we start working on all the reforms we discussed, so their King won’t whine about it.”

I’m nodding, lost in thought.

I am sure, despite that little angry act at the beginning, my dad secretly loves that everything went south, and he has a chance of getting his favorite child back.

I snap my head up when my dad starts to close the door after them.

“Dad, wait! The rogue attacks from the north? They are not rogues. I mean, they kind of are technically, but the original rogues call them the Unwanted, and they get attacked by them too.”

“Why didn’t they say anything?” My dad steps inside again, without my mom this time. She’s probably going to check on brunch preparation, as Luna should .

My stomach growls at the thought of food.

“I think we both were too occupied with the war between us to notice any other threat, plus they think they have it under control.”

“Do they?”

“No, but to be honest, Cain’s officers didn’t have all the information. They didn’t know what the Unwanted did on our side. I already made Cain look at the reports in a different light, and he kind of agreed with me, so it’s probably being taken care of right now. They said they still get new people trying to join them. That was weird… Oh, and we met one in the middle of rogues' territory, but Cain killed it before questioning.”

I wish I had more information for him, but I act precisely as he told me a few weeks ago—slowly, getting the trust first. Better safe than sorry.

“Did it smell?”

That is a weird question on my dad’s part.

“What do you mean?” I narrow my eyes at him.

“Well, I heard from my great-grandpa that his dad said rogues used to always smell rotten. I guess before they united in their own pack and made their own Kingdom.”

So, it wasn’t just a legend?

“Now that you mention it, that wolf did smell a little bit sour, like human sweat or maybe an abandoned dog. Still werewolf but… dirty, I guess. Either way, something is wrong with them, so be careful.”

“I never told you how good of a general you are. Do you want to have your job back?”

I nod enthusiastically, because that’s what my brain tells me to do.

But my heart? It’s second-guessing my choice. Did I make a choice already? Am I really staying with my parents instead of… I don’t even know what the alternative is. Chasing after Cain? Begging him for forgiveness? Living with him in constant and growing fear? Getting killed too soon ?

“Okay, great,” My dad says, unaware of my inner turmoil, and turns around but stops in the doorway again. “What is the deal with Cain cutting my seer’s hand?”

“Oh, that was me. I’m sorry.” I have enough decency to look apologetic.

He looks at me, less surprised than I thought.

Okay, what opinion do my parents have of me?! For real!

“Why were you even there?” he asks with furrowed brows.

“Cain bit me, quite hard and it didn’t want to heal. It was weird.”

“Oh, that’s probably because of his heritage.”

Seriously, what else don’t I know?

“What do you mean by his heritage? He’s a royal rogue with alpha blood just like mine. I know we are not marked, but I thought it might be the mate thing anyway.”

“He’s part Lycan,” Dad says in the same tone you would talk about donuts.