Page 28 of Risky Match (Royal Spies #1)

“You still have plenty of time,” she reassures with a squeeze to my forearm.

“That’s what I told myself every year. But this year felt different in a bad way.

A couple of months ago, I started dreading Wimbledon for fear something horrible would happen again.

The worry and fear that I would never achieve my dream and remove this weight off my shoulders started to weigh me down. It consumed my thoughts.”

“I can see how that would happen.”

“It became worse though. One day my heart raced, my chest tightened, and I broke out in a sweat. I knew I was having a heart attack and rushed to the doctor.”

“Oh, my god. How bad was it?”

She leans forward grasping my arm with both her hands, the color draining from her face.

“Fortunately, my heart was fine. It was my first panic attack. It turns out the symptoms are very similar to a heart attack.”

“At least it wasn’t a heart attack. But you said it was the first one. Have there been more?”

“Yes.”

“You must have been so frightened.”

“I was. I still am, if I’m honest. They can happen at any time. And the fear that the press would learn about it and tell everyone that I panic over my tennis matches made it even worse. I couldn’t talk to anyone.”

I’m shocked that I’m talking about this so freely with anyone other than my therapist. It’s cathartic to be able to share this with someone I haven’t paid to listen. Bri makes me feel so comfortable and safe.

“I can’t imagine how hard that was. Is that why you hired Natalie?” she asks softly.

“Yes. Eventually, Josh figured out what was going on and recommended her. She’s been helping me learn to deal with this.”

“Are there drugs that can help?”

“I opted not to go on medication. Some drugs are approved for athletes, but there have been several scandals lately with tennis players testing positive for unauthorized substances. The list of banned drugs changes regularly, so I didn’t want to take the risk that something I took could come back to haunt me the next time there’s an update. ”

“That makes sense. How are you managing?”

“Doc taught me techniques for getting through an attack when one happens. We also decided that I’d change my routine for the tournament. I arrived earlier than usual to have time to settle in. I promised myself I’d focus solely on practicing and not let myself be distracted.”

She clasps her hands over her mouth. “Oh, no! Then I arrived to play doubles with you. No wonder you tried to talk me out of it. The distraction must have freaked you out.”

“You have no idea. Then you said it would be your only way to play at Wimbledon and fulfill your dream. I couldn’t let you down. I knew how much it was killing me to have an unfulfilled need to win here. I couldn’t be responsible for that happening to you.”

“I had no idea. Agreeing to partner with me was so incredibly generous and unselfish of you. You truly understood what I was feeling.”

I nod and squeeze her hand. “I did. That’s why, with Natalie’s help, I became determined to make it work. I could spare a few hours to practice and play matches with you. Josh and Natalie helped me think of our doubles as extra practice time.”

“That makes sense, but I’m so sorry. I never would have intentionally put you in that position. I didn’t know.”

“Please don’t apologize. It turned out to be the best thing that could have happened for me.”

“How’s that?”

She looks mystified. It’s a cute look on her. Doesn’t she know how incredible she is?

“I’d been waiting for something bad to happen. I assumed that being forced to play doubles was that bad thing. But I’d found a way to handle it and turn it into a positive. At that point, I thought things were under control, and I could still win.”

“You have a great team. I’m glad they were there for you.”

“I know.”

“Thank you for sharing. I understand why you’re so focused on tennis. It also explains why you haven’t been much fun to be around most of the time. What changed tonight?”

“In the last day or two, I realized that I wanted to help you win. That led to some self-reflection. I slowly started seeing what was happening. Despite my dread of failing, I had moments with you on the practice court and in the hot tub where I felt like my happy self again despite things not going to plan here. After our night in the hot tub, I remembered that the tournaments I’ve won were ones where I was relaxed and felt good about life and my game.

I’ve never felt that way here before. I vowed to change that going forward. ”

“Is that why you’re happier tonight?”

“Yesterday, I saw you in the stands during my match. It made me smile to know you had taken the time to be there even if it was only to prep for our matches. I played great. It was a relief. Then today, it felt like we were having fun on the court. I wanted to be there with you. I’m sorry to say I hadn’t expected that.

I hope my honesty doesn’t hurt your feelings too much. ”

“Of course not. I’m thrilled you had fun today. It was a fantastic feeling to play together. My adrenaline was pumping. In fact, I’ve never played better.”

“We brought out the best in each other. After we won, it was like a ray of sunshine washed away the dark clouds that had been hovering over me. I can never thank you enough for that.”

“I don’t know what to say, except I’m happy for you.”

“Don’t say anything. Let me kiss you.”

I bend toward her luscious lips, hesitating ever so slightly to give her a chance to push me away. When she doesn’t, I press my mouth firmly against hers and begin to show Bri exactly how much I appreciate her.

My lips tingle as my hands roam down her back, pressing her against me. I want Bri to know what she does to my body and how much I want her.

She moans, “You feel sooo good.”

“I can’t get enough of you. We should go to my room.”

She jerks her head back, eyes wide, “No! We can’t.”

“I’m sorry. I thought you wanted this too.”

“Oh. I do. That’s not it. We need to go to my bedroom. Erin will panic if my room is empty tonight.”

At least I hadn’t totally misread the situation. “I’m not sure I like the idea of her walking in on us though.”

“She won’t if she knows I’m safely inside. I’ll text her. Let’s go.”

She takes my hand, and we hurry to her room.

I should take this slow and savor each moment tonight. But we both have so much pent-up sexual energy, it’s not possible. Instead, we shed our clothes the minute Bri’s bedroom door is locked and fall onto her bed facing each other.

We kiss and explore each other with our hands. Our bodies mold perfectly to each other. As we intertwine our legs, all the memories from two years ago come flooding back. I remember she loves when I nibble her ear and kiss her neck, so I quickly move to do just that.

She immediately shivers with delight and nuzzles her neck against my face, begging for more. I happily comply.

Her fingernails gently skim down my back sending sensations of pleasure straight to my cock. Good god, she remembers.

“You’re a goddess! Do that again.”

“I need you inside me,” she begs as her fingernails skim up my back, making me squirm.

“Are you ready for me, love?” I ask, reaching my hand between her legs, finding her drenched for me.

“Past ready. Please. Now,” she groans in needy frustration.

“Hold on, let me grab a condom.” Fortunately, I remembered to throw my wallet onto the nightstand when we stripped. After the hot tub, I’ve vowed never to be without a condom again any time there was a chance Bri might say yes.

She grabs the foil wrapper from me, rips it open with her teeth, and slowly rolls the condom onto me in a move that almost causes me to lose it. “Your hands are magic,” I groan.

I trace my cock over her wet folds. Positioning myself at her entrance, I ease in, letting her adjust to my size. She arches into me, and I slide in with a moan of pleasure. “You are so perfect. Are you okay?”

“I’m so far past okay.”

We move in sync as I thrust in and out. I reach under her, grabbing each of her ass cheeks, tilting them upward to hit her magic spot.

“Yes, oh my god, yes! Don’t you dare stop. I’m almost there,” she screams.

Feeling her pulsing around me, I find my release that’s more amazing than ever before as white lights flash under my closed eyelids.

We remain still and silent except for our heavy breathing as we gradually come down from the natural high.

When our breathing returns to normal, I excuse myself to dispose of the condom

Returning, I help her clean up and then spoon her against me and it occurs to me that this was different than two years ago.

We now know each other better. We shared personal details in the hot tub.

We truly are a team on the tennis court now and work well together.

When I look at her, I want to make her happy.

It makes me wonder if there could be a future for us.