Page 88 of Reflex

She shook her head unhappily as she fled the glitz and glamour and went out onto the street in search of a cab.No one photographed her.No one stopped or even slowed her departure.Away from the phenomenon that was Black Halo, she was simply an average girl in an overly expensive dress.One, if she was honest, she was desperate to shed.

“…anything but saintly.There’s more than one girl who’s regretted her involvement with him.”

Marshall’s words echoed in her head.It was a strange remark to fling at her.Didn’t every girl regret their past relationships at least part of the time?Spook had probably been no better or worse a boyfriend than any other guy, and they had to be talking about events from a decade ago.

She supposed there may have been something more recent.Maybe that was the issue.These associations hadn’t genuinely existed at all.Rather, like her, a girl or two had pursued him and got brushed off.That sort of let-down tended to result in catty remarks.She’d certainly cursed him to hell and back after the first time they’d hooked up and he hadn’t called.Not calling didn’t make one evil though.Cowardly, perhaps.But not a monster.

Alle knew Spook sometimes saw himself that way.She’d slept next to him two nights in a row, and he talked in his sleep.It worried her more that Marshall would dig into Spook’s past just for a story and to be a dick, than what he would uncover.She was certain that whatever it was that had convinced Spook to embrace celibacy would be something deeply personal, and not the sort of thing you’d want printed in a tawdry rag..

Dammit, things were going so well.She only really had another twelve hours she could stay here with him before her career called her back to the UK and a box-like studio.She’d hoped to spend that time enjoying one another’s company.Maybe convince him to join her in her hometown for a while before he took off to see his family.They had the future to talk about too – what was and wasn’t possible.She wanted to see what they could become.Spook was already so important to her.

For sure, some would put all her wants down to plain, old-fashioned lust, but it was more than that.There was something about Spook Mortensen that pulled at her in a way she’d never felt about anyone else.It wasn’t because he was in a band, or that he was breathtakingly beautiful, or even that he’d spanked her in the way she’d always desired for someone to do.It was deeper than that.A connection on a spiritual level.What’s more, she knew he felt it too.He fought it harder than she did, but it existed.It was real.If that hadn’t been so, then the last few days would never have happened.He’d never have trusted her to get as close to him as she had.They’d more or less gone all the way.He’d even spelled out that given time that physical connection would happen.

“I can’t lose you, Spook.”She mouthed to the world rolling by outside the taxi window.“Please don’t hold my brother against me.”