Page 148 of Redeemed (Dirty Air 4)

my frustration at Santiago out on his gifts, and it’s not right.

It’s not that I don’t want to forgive him. I wish my heart wasn’t as vulnerable and forgiving as it is. And that weakness makes me frustrated because I want to forgive him despite everything, and I’m not sure how I feel about it.

Do I love him? Yes.

Am I angry at him for hiding the biggest secret of my life? Absolutely.

Could I forgive him after he promised not to lie anymore? I’m not too sure.

But in the end, is a love built on lies really love at all?

“When you told me stories about you in the past, was that really about you or my dad?” I choke on the last word. The idea that my dad isn’t alive anymore takes some time to get used to. It’s like I’m stuck in a weird limbo—mourning a man I never met.

Matteo sits down in his leather chair and takes a sip of his coffee. I decided it would be better if we met at his house. Santiago’s home doesn’t feel right without him, and I can’t stand being there longer than I need to.

Is it fair that I forgave Matteo sooner than Santiago? Probably not. But some things take precedence, including learning whatever I can about my dad before I return to America. Because I am flying back soon. Right?

The tiny angel on my shoulder crosses her arms and pouts.

Yeah, yeah. Look where your good deeds got me.

Matteo offers me a hesitant smile. “Everything I shared with you the other day was about him. I’m sorry I’m not cool enough to go streaking through Milan. My brother was the wild child while I was more reserved.”

“A wild child you say?” Consider my interest piqued.

“Nothing could tame him. Whenever someone told him no, it was as if his brain rewired the word into a yes.”

“I’ve been told I can be a bit wild myself.” I smile at the connection to my dad.

“I don’t doubt it one bit. Those kinds of genes don’t skip a generation.”

I clasp my hands together in my lap. “What else can you share about him?”

“Are you sure that you feel ready to hear about him? I don’t want to upset you.”

“Yeah. I want to know about him before I head back to America.”

Matteo’s brows raise. “You plan on going back? Why?”

“I came here to find my dad, and well, he’s not exactly here anymore. There’s nothing here for me.”

“But what about Santiago?”

Shit. He’s your boyfriend to the world, Chloe. Of course you need to think about how your decisions affect him. I rush to respond. “I think we could use a break.”

He frowns. “Because of what happened between the three of us?”

I look away and nod. “Yes. It’s hard for me to forgive liars. Not talking to you isn’t an option for me because I want to learn about my father. But with Santiago…I’ve had plenty of bad experiences with people who manipulate the truth to last a lifetime.”

“I can see where you’re coming from. I really can, even though I haven’t been through it myself. But you’ve been dating him for a year. That’s a long time to just get up and leave when things get hard. Are you sure you can’t sort it out?”

It’s hard to not scoff at the idea of dating Santiago for a year. I haven’t even had a relationship with my Netflix subscription for that long.

I choose my words wisely. “A break could give us some distance to figure things out.”

“Distance doesn’t fix things. Talking them out does.”

“No offense, but the only reason I’m talking to you is because I want to know about my dad. I’m not exactly happy with you either.”