Page 45 of Pucking Sweet
Anderson steps in behind me, and I can just barely smell his expensive cologne. It unlocks so many memories. “You left me the night before our wedding,” he goes on. “I had to wake up and find the ring and that pathetic fucking note. You bailed, and I moved on. Now you’re gonna crucify me for it?”
I spin around, my rage burning white-hot. “You moved on with mysister! Are you freaking kidding me, Anderson? There wasn’t a single other woman in the whole wide world you could rebound with?”
He glares down at me, that sweep of dark hair framing his brow. “You don’t think I tried? You think I wanted this?”
“Well, you can’t have tried very hard now, can you? The population of metro DC alone is, like, what? Five million people? If we assume half of those are women, and even just a quarter of those women would be willing to consider marrying an egotistical, entitledass, that still leaves over half a million women you could’ve dated before you crawled into bed with my sister!”
“Poppy—”
“Did you date half a million women in a year, Anderson?”
“No, but I—”
“Did you at least float them your nepo baby resumé that just says ‘M&H Construction’ at the top?”
“God, you are such a fuckingbitch,” he shouts. “No wonder you’re still fucking single.”
I can’t hide my flinch as I try desperately to rebuild my walls of slipping sand. “Anderson, please, let’s not do this here—”
He leans in, glaring at me. “I’ve waited three goddamn years to say this to you, Poppy: I thank my lucky stars every day that I was spared being yoked to you for the rest of my fucking life. I already wasted three good years on you. I’m not wasting anymore. You’re insufferable and you’re gonna die alone.”
A moment of silence hangs heavy in the air between us. Slowly, I nod, blinking back my tears. It’s true, we dated for three years. In that time, I gave him my heart and my body. I told him I loved him again and again. I told him until I started to believe it too. I tried so hard to be what he needed and what my family expected.
And they had such beautiful dreams for us. We attended every society function, blazing our trail straight to the peak of Olympus—state senate runs, then the governor’s mansion, maybe even one day the White House itself. Anderson would be the star, and I would be the one who helped him shine.
St. James & Montgomery, the merger of the century.
That was my path…until I stood at my mirror the night before our wedding and took a long hard look at my reflection. I didn’t even recognize the woman looking back at me. Who was Poppy? I didn’t know anymore. I’d spent so much of my life following the rules and living up to other’s expectations. I twisted myself inside out again and again. First for my family, then for him.
Anderson dismissed my dreams and belittled me in front of our friends, so I made my dreams smaller. He was unfaithful, and I looked the other way. He was controlling, and I corrected my behavior to better meet his exacting standards. All the while, our families looked on with pride.A match made in heaven. Mom used to say that about us too. I close my eyes tight, catching my tears before they fall, ashamed I can’t hold them back.
Anderson heaves a tired sigh. “Why do we do this, Pop? Why do we make each other so crazy?”
“Because we’re all wrong for each other, and always have been.” I gaze up at him. “Just…tell me you love her. Tell me you’re different with her. Tell me you’re faithful. Tell me you listen to her. Tell me you care.”
He rubs the back of his neck. “Poppy…”
“Please, Anderson.”
His gaze heats as his frustration mounts again. “What the hell do you want me to say here? I mean, come on, Poppy. You know what this is. You know how this game is played. You used to play it better than anyone.”
For the third time today, my heart drops. “You’re just using her. You’re using my little sister?”
He scoffs. “Of course I’m using her. I’m using her like she’s using me—likeyouused me.”
I shake my head again.
“Oh, don’t act so holier than thou.” He levels a finger in my face. “You used me for my name and my family and everything that came with it. You wanted to be queen of the fucking universe. Admit it.”
“No. I didn’t, Anderson, which is why I gave back the ring and left.”
He sighs, dropping his hand to his side.
I look around at the opulence of this grand hotel lobby, steeped in so much history and significance, and I feel nothing but a deep, aching emptiness. For so long, I chased this. I chased belonging in a place like this, belonging to people like Anderson Montgomery, and for what?
“This life is done for me,” I say. “I’m done, and now I’m leaving.” I turn away, and Anderson grabs my hand.
“What now, Poppy? I marry into your family, and you’ll just be a ghost? For the rest of our shared lives, you’ll just be somebody that I used to know?”
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