Page 40 of Pucking My Grumpy Accidental Husband

"Since when are you an expert on wind acoustics?"

"Since I started reading about atmospheric physics," Dax replies without missing a beat, and I have to press both hands over my mouth to keep from laughing.

Because of course that's how his brain works. Most people would panic and come up with a terrible lie. Dax's brain immediately goes to atmospheric physics.

"You've been reading about atmospheric physics," Jamie repeats slowly.

"It's fascinating stuff. Did you know that wind patterns can create acoustic phenomena that mimic other sounds?"

"Dax."

"What?"

"You're insane."

"I'm curious about the world around me."

"You're standing in our kitchen explaining wind physics to justify weird noises while Fifty Shades is paused on our TV. This is not normal behavior."

"Define normal," Dax counters.

"Normal is not watching BDSM movies alone while researching atmospheric science!"

"First of all, I wasn't researching atmospheric science while watching the movie. Those are two separate intellectual pursuits."

"Since always, you absolute weirdo."

Jamie's phone rings, saving us both.

"Oh shit, that's Sofia," Jamie says. "I should take this. But we're not done discussing your weird evening activities."

"Looking forward to it," Dax says dryly.

I hear Jamie walk toward his bedroom. As soon as his door closes, the pantry door opens and Dax's face appears.

"Are you okay?" he whispers.

"I'm fantastic," I whisper back. "Just living my best life hiding in your pantry surrounded by protein powder and Pop-Tarts."

"This is not how I planned this evening going."

"Really? 'Romantic dinner interrupted by atmospheric physics lecture' wasn't on your agenda?"

He grins. "I was improvising."

"Atmospheric physics, Dax? Really?"

"It seemed reasonable at the time."

"You're insane."

"You like it."

"I really shouldn't, but I really do."

We can hear Jamie's voice through his bedroom wall. Dax and I look at each other, both realizing how close we came to complete disaster.

"We can't keep doing this," I whisper.