Page 35 of Puck Love

“Good.” He kicked off his shoes and slid into his sleeping bag fully clothed in PJs and a T-shirt, dimming the lantern and rolling over.

I thought about turning the light on just to bug him, but I wasn’t in the mood to stir up shit. I just wanted to sleep this unsettling feeling away. If I’d played this better, I’d have been in a cozy room at the Black Horse Inn, getting some shut-eye before hopping on the first flight outta here. Instead, I’d opted to stay…with Jake. And it wasn’t because I gave a shit about appearances.

I needed to know why.Why him, why now, just…why?

“Do you really think that was adrenaline gone wild?” I asked. “You know…at the sex tree?”

He sighed in the dark. “Go to sleep, Trinsky.”

“I’m serious. Has that happened to you…prior to today?”

“No.”

I let the silence gather for a few minutes, and tried again. “Are you gay?”

“No. Are you?”

“No.” Another silence. “Are you bi?”

“My personal life is none of your fucking business,” he replied in a deceptively mild tone.

“It kinda became my business when you stuck your tongue down my throat.”

Jake turned abruptly, his profile illuminated in shadow. “Youkissed me.Youstarted it. Not me.”

True.

“Maybe I’m bi,” I whispered, mostly to myself.

“It’s not that big of a deal. A lot of people are. Good night.”

Silence.

“If I am, I’m surprised it would be you. I mean, I guess you’re attractive, but you’re not feminine…at all. And you have a fucking beard. You’re…a guy.” I ignored his muffled half laugh and continued, staring up at a seam in the canvas lining of the tent. “I would have thought I’d notice men more too. I haven’t. It’s always been women for me. I like women.”

After what felt like a twenty-minute pause, Jake rolled to face me, the whites of his eyes glinting. “It was one time, and there were extenuating circumstances. It doesn’t mean anything has changed for you. So quit overthinking it.”

“Good advice, except I don’t usually overthink anything. Have you ever kissed a guy before?”

“Why are we doing this, Trinsky?”

“That’s a yes.”

Jake gave a humorless snort. “Yes. Okay, yes, are you satisfied?”

My heart beat a little faster. “When? How often? Just one guy? Do I know him?”

He sighed again. “I’m bi, and that’s all I have to say. Good night.”

“You’ve fucked guys?” I winced at my adolescent squawk.

“Jesus, Trinsky. Shut up and go to sleep.”

“There’s no chance I’m going to sleep now. I need to know everything.”

“No, you don’t. We’re not friends.”

“No, but what we did technically made us…the L word.” I pulled a comical face, grateful he couldn’t see my expression. “For a hot second anyway.”