Page 21 of Protected By the Bikers Next Door (Never Just One #4)

Harper

I don’t have time to process the result before the sound of the bathroom door creaking on its hinges and footsteps interrupt the silence.

“Harper, you okay, hon? You’ve been in here an awfully long time,” Pam’s voice calls out, echoing on the tiles.

“Yes, yes, I’m fine,” I reply, stuffing the test deep into the bin and flushing the toilet before coming out of the stall.

“You don’t look fine,” Pam says, surveying me. “Are you sure you’re okay? I know we don’t know each other very well, but you can trust me. I’m a good listener,” she says with a comforting smile. She’s so nice, so maternal, that I find myself spilling my concerns to her.

“I’m pregnant. I just took a test.”

Pam pauses for a moment, carefully watching my reaction. “I take it the guys don’t know?” she asks cautiously. I shake my head. “And I’m guessing you’re not sure which one of ‘em is the daddy?”

“No. It could be any of them,” I admit.

“Well then, I guess I can see you’re in a bit of a unique situation. And I can tell that this isn’t a planned baby,” she adds, her words slow and measured.

“No, definitely not.”

“Well, how do you feel? What’s worrying you? Not ready to be a mom again?”

“No, it’s not that. In fact, now that I know I’m pregnant, I know I want this baby badly.

” As I say this, I know it’s true. I want to have this child.

The thought of having a perfect little baby that is part me, part one of the men I’m falling for, is fantastic.

If I allow myself to dream, the idea of a family filled with children, raising them with the guys, is exactly what I want.

I just don’t know if they want that too.

“You’re worried the guys won’t feel the same,” Pam correctly guesses.

I nod, biting my lip anxiously. “Well, for what it’s worth, I can tell each of those men is head over heels for you, and I know that they’d all make great dads, that they’d kill to have a family.

If it’s what you want, you should let ‘em know. No matter what, they deserve to know.”

Panic floods me. “I’m not ready to tell them yet,” I admit, stricken. “I will. I need time to process it myself first, I only just found out. Promise you’ll keep this to yourself for now?” I plead, taking her hand in mine.

“Of course sweetie, it’s not my news to share. Your secret is safe with me.”

“Thanks, Pam, you’re a good friend.”

She squeezes my hand and smiles. “Come on, let me show you around the place, introduce you to some folk.”

Pam is exactly the kind of friend I need right now.

She distracts me and makes me feel welcome, like part of the family, at the same time.

When the time comes to collect the kids from school, the guys are still busy, and she offers to collect Jenny for me.

“Sammy and Jenny have been begging for a playdate for a while now. She could even sleep over in our spare room if you need a break, perhaps some time to talk to your men in private when you get home?” she offers generously.

“Really? That wouldn’t be too much to ask?” I say gratefully.

“Nope. Besides, you didn’t ask. I offered.”

I thank her profusely before calling the school to inform them that Jenny will be going home with Sammy and Pam that day.

Pam heads out, leaving me with the other Shadow Pack members we’ve been chatting with.

I excuse myself and head to the bathroom.

On the way back, I bump into a blonde woman who seems vaguely familiar.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the new chew toy,” she says with a predatory smile revealing sharp white teeth against her red lips. I realize then where I recognize her from. She’s the woman from the cookout, Susan, the one who was crying and shouting at Wolf.

“Excuse me?”

She looks me up and down, nostrils flared in disgust. “They used to like their women tight and fit. They must have wanted to try something new, or maybe they’ve run out of good choices and you’re a last resort.”

I’m not sure what’s gotten into me, but instead of standing back and taking it, I find myself spitting out, “What did you just say to me? Who the hell do you think you are?”

“I was you, sweetheart. The girl your boys fucked and shared before you came along. The woman who will be there long after you’re gone, too, when they come to their senses and realize that I’m the one they want,” she says, preening, pushing her fake breasts out and batting her false eyelashes.

“You’re delusional,” I say, but there’s uncertainty in my voice. This woman is their ex? I know they said they shared before, but I didn’t think they’d been in a proper relationship like ours. I’d assumed it was just the occasional hook up, that ours is special.

She pounces on my weakness, going for the kill. “I bet you struggle to keep up with their sexual appetites. Boy, they were wild. We used to have sex for days on end,” she recalls with glee.

At that moment, the guys appear, walking over with concerned expressions. “Susan,” Wolf says, his voice icy.

“Hey Wolfie,” she simpers. “I was just meeting your new plaything.”

“Harper is our old lady,” Wolf states pointedly, taking my hand in his.

Pain flashes across Susan’s face as she looks at me in disbelief. I feel triumphant. It’s evident that, whatever she was to them, they never used that term.

I try to keep that in mind for the rest of the evening as we laugh and drink with their friends—me politely refusing drinks, which thankfully doesn’t arouse suspicion as I’m not usually a big drinker.

Susan spends the whole time practically hanging off the guys, tactlessly inserting their shared history into the conversation at every opportunity.

For their part, the guys mostly ignore her or shrug her off, but I still find myself feeling a little jealous, a little disappointed that they don’t tell her to go away.

I try to say to myself that they’re just being kind, polite, this isn’t their home, it’s their business, they can’t kick out paying customers just for being flirtatious.

Even so, I can’t stop the niggle of doubt that creeps into my mind. What if Susan is right? What if I’m just a bit of fun before they move on to the next? What will I do then, with a baby on the way now?

The night continues to deteriorate as the guys consume more drinks; now, it’s not only Susan hanging onto their every word.

I don’t want to be that jealous girlfriend, but in their efforts to talk to everyone, I feel left out.

Of course, much of my time is occupied by curious members wanting to get to know me, which is nice, but I can’t help wishing that the guys wanted me by their side more.

For the past ten minutes, a friendly but overly chatty twenty-something called Tammy, has dominated my time, nattering away while I mostly zone out, worrying about what Susan said.

When she stops talking abruptly, her eyes widening and her mouth popping open in exaggerated surprise, I turn around to see what’s going on, only to face a sight that makes me feel sick to my stomach.

Wolf and Susan kissing. The sight of it sears in my brain, his hands gripping her arms like he wants to throw her over the bar and take her right there, her slim body pressed hard against his.

I can’t take it anymore. I turn on the spot, running for the bathroom, feeling like I’m going to throw up.

“Are you okay in there?” I hear Tammy outside the cubicle.

“I’m fine,” I respond, willing her to leave me alone.

“I’m sorry you had to see that. It was always inevitable that Susan and Wolf would get back together.

They’re meant to be, always have been, but he should’ve broken things off with you first,” Tammy says.

She’s trying to be kind, but her words are like daggers to my heart.

When I don’t respond, she continues. “Susan and Wolf are like those fated mates you hear about, destined for each other. She didn’t mind him having his fun for a while, but now she’s pregnant, they need to be together for real, be a family. You understand that, don’t you?”

I come out of the stall, needing to see Tammy’s face to tell if she’s being truthful. “Susan’s pregnant?”

My mind goes to the life growing inside of me. Two babies. Will Wolf want us both? Will he expect that because he’s fine with me being with his friends, I should tolerate him having a relationship with another woman? Perhaps it’s hypocritical of me, but I just can’t do it.

“Yeah, she thinks it happened the day of the cookout round his place, but who knows? Those two are like magnets, always drawn together. He always goes back to her,” Tammy says wistfully.

“I can’t believe this,” I whisper to myself. The fact that he had sex with her so soon before sleeping with me only makes it that much more painful.

“Oh, sweetie, it will be okay,” Tammy says, rubbing my arm.

“You didn’t actually think a relationship with all three guys was going to be permanent?

You couldn’t have believed that it was anything more than just fun?

” She looks so patronizing. I want to slap her.

“The good news is, Susan isn’t into sharing, not for a serious relationship.

She just wants Wolf. Which means you can have Bear and Hawk all to yourself,” she says with a condescending smile, like she’s offering me a consolation prize.

As much as I don’t want to lose Bear and Hawk either, I can’t imagine being around Wolf, seeing him with Susan, and it not hurting. Like a chair missing a leg, remove one of us and the whole thing topples.

Even if I could still be with Bear and Hawk, it doesn’t make Wolf’s betrayal any less painful.

“I need to get out of here,” I say before pushing past Tammy, heading for the emergency exit.

The cool night air hits me, and I take deep, desperate breaths, gulping air into my lungs to try to hold back the wall of hysteria rising within me.

I need to get away. To have time to think.

To lick my wounds and heal. I can’t simply move back home.

I’d still have to see them every day. The proximity that had seemed so convenient now feels like a cruel trick.

Instead of the relaxing evening I envisioned, I call Mira and ask if Jenny and I can stay for a couple of days. She readily agrees, concerned as I tell her I’ll explain everything when I get there.

I climb into the truck, ready to go home and pack before picking up Jenny from Pam’s house and going to Mira’s.

With a task to focus on, I can almost pretend this nightmare isn’t happening, that I’m not pregnant.

That Wolf isn’t leaving me for another woman who also happens to be pregnant with his child.

As I’m packing, it occurs to me that I owe it to them to stay and hear them out, but I can’t bring myself to.

It would break me if I had to look into Wolf’s eyes and hear that he’s in love with someone else.

To hear from Bear and Hawk that this was just a bit of fun, or worse, that they want a relationship with Susan like we have.

With the house in my rearview mirror, I realize that the one thing I’m most afraid of is the simple fact that it’s already too late. No matter what, I can’t change the fact that I’m in love with all three men. But they don’t love me back.