Page 32 of Promise of Destruction (Destruction & Vengeance Duet #1)

thirty-one

Soren

I hate Declan for bringing me here, particularly unprepared. I mean, I showered this morning, but a quick heads up so I could have washed up in the bathroom at work would have been appreciated, and that's saying nothing of how nice it would be to have time to mentally prepare.

I loathe the fact that I'm too scared to go back on my own, that I asked a man who I hate to be beside me during something so... awkward. Uncomfortable. Painful.

I know he's already seen me naked, thanks to spying on me in my fucking bathtub, but it doesn't stop me from making him turn and face the wall when I undress as fast as I can, in a hurry to slip into the paper gown before he can turn around and get a peep show.

The only good that can possibly come from this scenario is that seeing me like this will without a doubt kill any of the sexual desire he has for me. This awful paper gown is hideous; it makes everything feel so much worse, but I suppose it's better than just draping me with a cloth.

I sit down before I allow him to turn back around, and I refuse to meet his gaze as he slinks into a seat, looking as uncomfortable as I feel. Serves him right.

The open back of the gown leaves the cool air to lick at my spine, but a shiver presses between my shoulders and I realize his eyes are on me. I straighten, hiding my back, and glare at him in silence as we wait for the doctor to come in.

I will never emotionally recover from this humiliation, which I'm sure is exactly what he wanted.

God, I should have just sucked it up and come back here alone.

I stare at the ground, unable to bring myself to look at the pictures on the walls, the instruments set up on the counter. I can feel an impending panic attack just below the surface, and I don't want to give him that.

I nearly jump off the table when the doctor walks in, smiling like we're old friends.

"Soren?" She extends her hand to me, as if this is a fucking business meeting, and I take it because what the hell else am I going to do? "I'm Doctor Kane. You can call me Leah. How are you feeling today?"

"Pissed." I snap, before I can control myself. My fight or flight has been triggered, and I don't even know why.

"I'm sorry to hear that." She frowns. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Just make it quick." I grumble, hating myself now for being mean to a doctor who genuinely seems like she wants to help.

"I can do that." She nods, her brown ponytail bobbing. "But before we get into the examination, I want to talk, if that's okay?"

Talk ?

I stare at her, which she takes as permission to carry on.

"Many of my patients have come to me with a history of sexual abuse or violence.

They may feel unsafe or confused during this process.

As a survivor myself, I like to take the time to explain what tests I'm going to do.

I'll warn you before you feel any touch.

Are you comfortable with your partner in here during the exam? "

Her eyes don't leave me, but I assume it's Declan she's referring to.

"He's not my partner." I rush out, and her eyebrows shoot up in concern. Her eyes slide to Declan, and I wonder what excuses her brain makes up for his presence before I clear my throat. "But I want him here... please."

"Okay." She nods slowly, watching Declan warily before her eyes flick back to me. "Are you comfortable discussing the information from your medical history form with him in the room?"

Something about the way she phrases it makes me think she's intentionally giving me an out, and I'm not too proud to take it.

"No." I say firmly. "I don't want to discuss anything I wrote in there."

Full-stop.

I don't want to discuss it with her, and I definitely don't want to discuss it in front of Declan.

"Okay." She nods again and then begins to wash her hands with her back to me.

When I watch her snap on the gloves, I decide I'm going to make Declan Evers pay for this humiliation if it's the last thing I do.