Page 7

SEVEN

ETHAN

I hadn’t expected to see Andre today after the way things ended last night, but his email and a nudge from Liam found me at the library once camp wrapped up for the day.

Camp had put me in a great mood, so at least I was in a good frame of mind for the visit. The campers were psyched to be there, and it was a fun day for them and the coaches. I could already tell that the exhibition game featuring the campers and my friends would be outstanding.

Inside the library the scent of books took me back.

It was as familiar as the smell of the rink.

The library had changed little since I was a kid, other than adding several more computers and listening stations.

It still had the cozy vibe I remembered.

There was a new couch in the corner where I used to work on the exercises Mrs. Goddard recommended, but it looked just as comfy.

I approached the circulation desk where Clara, a woman with curly red hair and bright green glasses, typed away at a computer.

“Hi, Clara,” I said, using my library voice. The last thing I wanted was to have to be shushed. “Is Andre around?”

Clara looked up, her eyes widening slightly in recognition. “Oh! Ethan, hello. Andre mentioned you might stop by.” She glanced at her computer screen. “He’s in a festival meeting right now but should be back soon. I’ll text him so he knows you’re here.”

“Thanks.” I smiled, appreciating how exuberant she was while also being quiet.

“You can have a seat anywhere or feel free to browse.”

A colorful poster caught my eye as I turned away.

I studied the text carefully and discovered it was about the library’s banned book project with a photo of Andre speaking at what looked like a conference.

Below the image was a call for community members to write letters of support for Andre’s nomination for an award.

I’d heard something about the library being up for an award but hadn’t had a moment to get the details.

“Sorry to interrupt.” I paused for Clara to look up from her work at the computer. “Can you tell me more about the award Andre’s up for?”

Her face lit up. “It’s for the Library Association of America’s Freedom to Read award. Andre organized our banned book project three years ago. The program’s been incredibly successful and not just here in Maplewood. It even inspired similar programs across the country.”

It wasn’t a surprise that Andre started something like that. “That’s amazing. What does the project involve?”

“It started as a simple display of frequently banned books that we already carried. It’s grown so that we have every book that’s landed on a banned book list in the U.S.

Most of them are in our digital catalog since it’s over four thousand titles.

Andre expanded it into a series of events too.

We have book clubs, author talks, and a writing workshop for teens and adults so they can explore themes from banned books in their own work. ” Clara’s enthusiasm was contagious.

Incredible. I knew my contributions through the Maplewood Foundation funded banned book programs for the library, but I hadn’t investigated the breadth of it.

The front door swung open and Andre rushed in. There was a hint of tension on his face, but he gave me a welcoming smile. That was something I didn’t think I’d ever received from him before. It sent a flutter through my chest.

I didn’t know what to do with these feelings about Andre.

“Ethan, hey.” He was slightly out of breath. “Sorry to keep you waiting. The festival security meeting ran long.”

“No worries,” I said as he came over to the desk. “I was chatting with Clara about the banned book project. Congratulations on the award nomination.”

“Thanks. It’s been a labor of love for all of us.”

I gave him a quizzical look. “Clara was telling me about the work you’ve put into it, and not just for Maplewood.”

Andre looked at Clara with half exasperation, half amusement.

She grinned unrepentantly. “Just spreading the good word.”

Andre shook his head, but he couldn’t hide the fondness in his expression. He scrubbed his hand over his face.

“Anyway,” he said, turning back to me. “Did you want to talk here, or…”

I glanced around the library. It didn’t feel comfortable having what might be a personal conversation in such a public space.

“Actually, it’s a beautiful day out. Want to grab a coffee and sit outside somewhere?”

Andre looked relieved. “That sounds perfect.” He took his tablet out of his bag before handing it over to Clara to put behind the desk.

Special Blend was a short walk away. On the sidewalk, we fell into step beside each other, a comfortable silence between us.

As we walked, I snuck glances at Andre. He looked tired, with faint shadows under his eyes, but there was an energy about him that was undeniable. Even stressed, he had a certain charm and charisma.

I wondered what it would be like to really get to know him, beyond the superficial level we were used to.

At the cafe we joined the short line. When we reached the counter, Caspian took our order. Andre asked for his usual, hibiscus tea. I tried something different with the rainbow-spiced latte, a special for Pride. Caspian also apologized for being out of Andre’s favorite, maple pecan scones.

When I reached for my wallet, he waved me off. “This one’s on me. Consider it part of my apology.” Andre tapped his phone on the payment terminal.

I hesitated, not wanting to dwell on our argument, but Andre’s expression was earnest. “Thanks.”

We grabbed our drinks and found a small table outside. The warm breeze made it a perfect early summer afternoon.

“Thanks for sending over the judging details. I’ll look those over tonight and let you know if I have any questions.” I blew across the top of my drink to cool it down. “So, we didn’t talk much about the overall festival planning. How’s it going?”

Andre sucked in a breath. “Honestly, I think we might have expanded too far. It looks excellent on paper, but pulling it off is more than I expected. There’s always something new popping up. But I do think we’ll pull it off.”

I nodded encouragingly. “That’s good news. Anything major giving you trouble?”

Andre ran a hand across his face. “A couple of things came up this morning. Remember I told you about the streaming project?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, we’ve got a team of college students who can do it, but we need a place to put them up. And an author for the book festival had to cancel.”

I nodded, considering potential solutions. “I think I can help. After all, I’ve got two houses right now.” I hoped bringing up my recent purchase wouldn’t stir up trouble, but it could certainly help.

Andre’s eyes widened. “Are you sure? That would be incredibly helpful.”

“Of course. How many people are we talking about?”

Andre flipped digital pages. “Six for sure, possibly eight. But we don’t want to impose…”

I waved off his concern. “You won’t. I’m already planning to be living out at the Montgomery place within the next couple of days, which leaves one house unoccupied.

There’s space at the new house too if you need it.

We can make it work”—I paused and shifted into a conspiratorial whisper—“as long as they’re not planning to throw raging parties. ”

Relief washed over Andre’s face. I hadn’t expected to be so thrilled at being able to take care of that for him.

“That would be amazing. Thank you so much. And I’ll make them promise no parties.” He chuckled, picking up that I was only kidding.

“Glad to do it. Just have whoever is leading the team contact me for the keys.” I shifted topics. “About the author cancellation, I might be able to help with that too. What are you looking for?”

Andre looked surprised but intrigued. I didn’t think he expected me to be friends with an author. “We need someone who is queer and writing queer fiction or nonfiction. Name recognition would be great, but at this point we’d be grateful for anyone who can step in on short notice.”

“How about Kendrick Sanderson?”

Andre’s mouth dropped open. “Seriously? The author of the Rainbow Rivers series? We tried to get him, but we were told he wasn’t doing events right now.”

“I can make a call. His boyfriend is one of the players we haven’t announced yet for Saturday’s game. I don’t know if Kendrick’s coming with him, but I can find out and if he’d be into doing the event.”

Andre put his hand over the top of mine, squeezed it, and then left it there. “He would be an incredible addition. I don’t want to get my hopes up, but… wow.”

He pulled his hand away suddenly, seemingly startled that he was still touching me.

The warmth of his hand was gentle and reassuring in a way I didn’t expect, and I wished he’d kept it there longer.

“I’ll make a call as soon as we’re done and see what he says.”

We sipped our drinks in companionable silence for a moment before Andre turned serious.

“Ethan, I want to apologize again for last night,” he said, his voice low and sincere. “I was out of line, and I said so many things I regret. It was wrong to take my frustration out on you. I’m truly sorry.”

I took a deep breath, a mix of emotions pinging around in my head. Part of me wanted to brush it off, to say it was all in the past. But this was a pivotal moment.

“I appreciate that,” I said carefully. “I think we have some misconceptions about each other, and I’d like to get those behind us.”

Andre nodded, looking relieved. “If it’s okay, I’d like to understand better so I don’t make the same mistakes.”

I hesitated, old insecurities rising up about discussing my reading problems, but Andre’s expression was open and curious. I took another sip of my latte, gathering my thoughts.

“Calling it bullying might have been a poor choice of words. It was more…” I had to pause because I wanted this to come out right. “I always thought I was disappointing you. You were so passionate about events and causes, and I could never measure up to what you wanted.”

Andre’s forehead creased. I imagined he was replaying our past in his mind. “I suppose I wanted—expected—you to do the same that other athletes did. To attend events. Rally other students.”

Looking into my coffee cup, I ran through my relaxation exercises since it was time to lay everything out for him.

I looked up before I spoke. “School was a struggle. I have pretty severe dyslexia, making reading very difficult, so much of my energy went into studying to keep my grades up. And I needed good grades so I could stay on the hockey team.”

“Ethan, I had no idea.” His hand was back on mine and that sent goose bumps up my arm. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

I shrugged, a familiar mix of embarrassment and defensiveness trying to rise up. “I was self-conscious, so I kept it only to my family and close friends.”

His voice wavered a bit as he responded. “I wish I’d known. I’d like to think I would’ve tried to help or at least been more understanding.”

“It’s okay,” I said, surprised to find that I meant it. “We were kids. The experience taught me a lot about asking for help and offering help as much as I can. My moms were great through it all, and I had some very supportive teachers and friends.”

“Still, I feel terrible that I added to the stress. You hid all that so well.” He paused, his gaze shifting to the ceiling. “I always admired you. It seemed like you had everything together.”

“You did?” I couldn’t hide my surprise.

“You were this amazing athlete, popular, and always kind. If I’m honest, I wanted to be around you more. That’s one of the reasons I kept asking you to work on projects and was so disappointed when you wouldn’t.”

Warmth spread through me, coming directly from where his hand touched mine. “I thought you saw me as a dumb jock who didn’t care about anything important.”

Andre looked down at the table and shook his head. “I can’t say sorry enough.” He looked back at me, his gorgeous brown eyes—when did I start thinking of his eyes that way?—appearing on the verge of tears. “Talk about misconceptions.”

The weight I’d been carrying about working with Andre started to lift. “I’m glad we talked. Not just to get through the festival but to put all that firmly in the past.”

Andre’s smile widened. “The festival is going to be epic.”

“And maybe after the festival madness, we could grab coffee again or dinner? Get to know each other in the present.”

A slow smile spread across Andre’s face, making my heart do a little flip. “I’d like that.”