Page 14 of Pretending to Love a Lyon (The Lyon’s Den Connected World)

G raham escorted Lady Amelia through another three rooms before the musicale came to an end. Her aunt and cousin haunted their steps everywhere they went, but did not approach. However, he did hear them on more than one occasion discussing the betrothal joyfully, as if the aunt had arranged the whole endeavor herself in Amelia’s favor. An intriguing tactic.

But they’d both survived, somewhat unscathed. Graham was collecting their cloaks while Lady Amelia visited the ladies’ retiring room. Graham waited as the guests thinned, until Lady Amelia at last appeared, red cheeked and eyes bright with a false smile as she sailed through the front door. Graham watched her, then chanced to look back at where she’d come from and saw her aunt and cousin watching him.

Bloody hell. They’d cornered her, hadn’t they? Likely said something awful to upset her. He followed her out. She hadn’t waited for him and was already inside the coach. The groom closed the door, and they sat in darkness, the curtains closed.

“No lamps?” he asked.

“There’s nothing to see. Why bother?”

He sighed and sat back. She was ready to take heads with her tone. He wasn’t interested in losing his at the moment, even if he did have a headache coming on. Besides the wailing music, Julia had questioned him closely about the issue with the well water and the sick sheep. Graham had tried to answer intelligently, but he was not a sheep farmer nor was he experienced with sheep illnesses. And he’d had no idea that while her husband had declined in his last years, she’d taken it upon herself to control the estate and now had a head for business and animal husbandry. Julia was always a pleasant surprise—more than just a seductive widow. However, she would be of no help to their imaginary problem, and diverting her had taken all his mental efforts.

He closed his eyes and must have nodded off because, when he opened them, the carriage was stopped and Amelia was climbing out again without waiting for his assistance.

Once inside, they handed off their cloaks and climbed the stairs toward Alston’s room, but before she took this volatile energy in there, he wanted to calm her down.

“Lady Amelia.”

She didn’t respond as she climbed the stairs ahead of him.

He ground his teeth, taking two at a time, until he passed her and blocked her path.

“Would you like to tell me what is wrong?”

“No,” she growled.

“What did your aunt say? Did Nelson do something again?”

“Oh, you didn’t notice?” She stepped around him and made it to the landing. “No, I suppose you wouldn’t have. You were too engrossed in your conversation with Julia .”

He’d turned to follow her, but at that, he froze. She carried on, heading toward Alston’s room.

When he was speaking with Julia? He’d been sitting right next to Amelia. How could anything have happened then? He shook his head and caught up to her, his larger strides easily closing the distance before she made it to Alston’s door.

“Tell me what happened.”

“It doesn’t matter,” she said, back to him. He touched her shoulder, and she shook him off. “Don’t touch me.”

Clenching his fists, he tried to restrain his anger, but he’d had enough of the constant strain. His sanity was wearing thin, and he was beyond exhausted. He took hold of her shoulder and turned her, backing her against the wall, placing his hand flat above her left shoulder, and stepping close enough she couldn’t dodge him or look away.

“I’m invoking my right as your fiancé to know what it is that upset you tonight, and I will not be denied.”

She leaned closer, their noses almost brushing. “ Pretend fiancé.”

“Not when we’re out there in the public eye.”

“Then why don’t you act like it?” she said between clenched teeth.

“Act like it? Like you belong to me?” He was confused. Did she want him farther away or closer?

“You truly want to know what my aunt said? Just before we left she said she wanted to warn me. You were likely after my inheritance, and after we wed—if not already—you’d carry on a dalliance with the likes of Lady Foxcroft. She called me na?ve and softhearted, lovestruck by the first man to come along and give me attention.” She pressed her lips together and swallowed. “Isn’t that ridiculous? You ignored me most of the evening, but somehow I’ve been swayed to marry you by your charms and attention. As for Nelson, he kept touching me in the drawing room until I snapped at his fingers with my fan. He had the good sense to leave me alone after that. I thought being engaged to you would somehow protect me, but I was wrong. Now they’re simply rabid to get between me and my inheritance before you steal it yourself. But other than that, it was a lovely evening, wouldn’t you say?”

Graham fisted his hand. Nelson had been touching her? And her aunt...

“I was by your side all evening.”

“Yes, much like a footman, waiting to hold my glass for me, but you weren’t with me. Don’t you understand that? You can’t even pretend to care for me. I fear you don’t have a future treading the boards.” She turned her face away from him.

Graham didn’t know what to say. He thought his own evening had been difficult, but he’d missed so much of her misery. He’d thought that by avoiding the potential for bickering and insults, and instead focusing on answering Julia’s questions as convincingly as he could, he and Amelia would better impress upon the crowd that they were betrothed. But in his neglect, he’d fed her to the wolves.

“I... I see. I apologize. I don’t know how to do this, Amelia.”

“Do what?”

He sighed. “Court a woman. Be... I don’t even have the words.”

Amelia huffed with a laugh. “You’ve never pursued a woman?”

“Not in the presence of polite society, no. I’ve never had cause to.”

“Not when women like Julia fall into your lap.” He scowled at her, and she smirked, knowing she’d hit her mark. “What would you say to me if we were alone?”

“We are alone.”

“No, not as you and me, but as other people. People who like each other. A man and woman who are interested in each other romantically. How would you seduce me?”

Graham wanted to groan. He lifted his gaze to hers and leaned in. Her breath caught, and the air between them thinned. His body pulsed to be near hers, and his heart thumped heavily in his chest. What would he say to her—not Amelia, but another fictional woman? No, it wasn’t working. All he could see was Amelia. There was no use pretending. And he definitely couldn’t tell her the things he’d say to her.

He stepped back. “I can’t be doing this, not with you. Not ever.”

She lifted her chin. “I don’t know what this is. Explain.”

“I can’t explain it. Seduction, being drawn closely to another—it’s an experience, knowledge gained through action. It’s an instinct.”

She scoffed. “And we have nothing but animosity between us. That’s why it’s so awkward. If you could just pretend, Graham. Treat me like a woman, not a na?ve child—”

“You are na?ve. And you’re impulsive and innocent and Alston’s sister. I can’t treat you like any other woman.”

She sobered. She reached out to touch his chest. Could she feel his heart pounding? Hear the rush of blood surging in his veins at her nearness?

“You have to. For Sam. You promised him you’d protect me like he would, but you are not my brother. We are in this ruse together, but I can’t play the part of a blushing bride-to-be if you... if you don’t even want to be near me. Can’t you at least try to pretend to like me? Is that really so difficult?” She swallowed. “Am I that awful?”

Her solemn words cut him. He cupped her cheek. “No. But I’m using restraint to protect us both.”

“You’re using too much. If we are engaged, there has to be a connection, a certain level of—what did you call it? Knowledge? Perhaps we need more history. Where did this relationship even begin?”

Graham fixed his gaze on his hand on her cheek. So soft and warm. Her perfume rose to his nostrils, and he tried to take small breaths. He remembered the first time he met her, but that wasn’t his strongest memory of her. No, that was the day she’d worn a white gown sprinkled with seed diamonds, when she’d made her debut into high society. Alston said it had cost a fortune, but she was worth every pound. She had sparkled like sunlight on fresh snow, glimmered like an angel as she made her grand entrance, ready to take on the ton and all its eligible bachelors. He’d stood there, unable to take his eyes off her. She was a fever dream. For just a moment—a fleeting, maddening moment—he thought he could fall in love with her. That smiling, sparkling girl. But by the end of the evening, he’d realized he was too old for a girl like her, too dull for her shine. He’d never wanted a woman like this—with heat and passion lighting him up from the inside. But her antics that night had cast a stark contrast between them, and he’d fought to bury his confusing feelings. He hadn’t known how to manage those emotions other than by pushing them down. So as she had danced with men more suitable to her exuberant nature, Graham had watched from the wall.

She had been a force of nature, refusing to be tamed.

She still was. But looking at her now, he could see what he didn’t know back then. It wasn’t arrogance that made her so resistant to conforming to society’s rules or her aunt’s machinations, but fear. She wanted control. She’d lost so much so young, and she was looking for something she could hold on to. But as a woman, very little was hers.

That , he realized now, was why she needed him. Not to simply watch over her, distant and aloof. She needed him to match her courage and to stand with her. He grazed her cheek with his thumb and focused on her mouth. She licked her lips.

He drew in a breath, calming the raging seas inside him. To do this he needed all of his restraint and a clear head.

“I’m going to kiss you. Just this once. That will be the intimate knowledge we have of each other. It may help with the way we act around each other when we need to be a couple.”

Or hinder it.

She sucked in a breath. “Mr. Blakewood—Graham,” she said breathily. “Are you sure this is wise?”

“Absolutely not. Nothing we’re doing here is remotely intelligent. But we’ve crossed that bridge. There is no going back.”

She nodded unconvincingly. “Very well.” She closed her eyes, her lips pressing together like she was bracing herself for something unpleasant.

“Is this your first kiss?” Graham asked huskily, biting back a smile. Need and desire sank low in his belly. He had to hold tight to his chains.

“Don’t make a scene about it, but yes. The first rule my brother ever gave me was ‘don’t let the lads kiss you.’”

Graham wanted to laugh. If only Alston knew what they were doing now. He’d kill Graham.

Graham braced himself, intent on giving her a light kiss. Something delicate and sweet. But as soon as his lips brushed hers, all that flew out the window. He didn’t expect her to kiss him back, but she molded her mouth to his. A soft sound came from her throat as she leaned into the kiss, like she’d done this before, like she’d kissed him a thousand times.