Page 6 of Pills and Potions: Snoh

SNOH

“ I ’m not delusional. It’s the little things she says or small gestures she makes.

I’m telling you, bro’, she playing with me.

This ain’t nothing but a game for her.” I was on the phone with my brother, Maze, giving him the rundown of the morning’s events just to make sure I wasn’t crazy.

Yeah, the obsession for her could make a nigga see and hear shit, but I saw what the fuck I saw and heard her loud and clear.

“Stop being delusional behind a woman that ain’t even looked yo’ way since she got there. What the fuck is you on this morning, nigga?” He was laughing at my pain, but I didn’t see shit funny.

“You ain’t trying to hear a nigga, Maze, and that’s cool.” I was frustrated at this point. Everybody thought I was crazy or delusional as hell, but London was opening that door, and they couldn’t tell me shit different.

“I hear you, bro’, but what’s different all of a sudden? You can’t even point that shit out. Leave that damn girl alone.”

“I can’t. You remember Old Man Nelson from The Shores?”

“Man, who don’t remember his old ass? Nigga don’t tell me you that desperate. Ain’t no way you stooping that low.”

“What the hoes say nowadays? Is!” I jested. Maze laughed and it felt good to hear it. He wasn’t around for personal reasons, but I missed the hell out of his ass.

“You stupid. What’s up with Adrisdia? Y’all still cool? She single? I’m cool with all that goth shit she be on. Tell her I said that. Boy I swear, that muthafucka so damn fine.” I shook my head knowing he would bring her up sooner or later. It never failed.

“She ain’t thinking ‘bout you Maze. L.I.G it. I got to go, nigga. I’ll hit you later.” The call was disconnected as I wore a half smile.

Being without him sometimes pulled on a nigga emotions but it was what it was. Magnolia Valley wasn’t for him no more and I understood. He was my big brother and regardless of where he went, I would always want him near.

It was midafternoon already. The morning slid by me fast, especially with that long ass Zoom call. I sent Thomas a text to get the car ready and exited my office. London stood ready to assist but I didn’t need her this go round.

“Nah, you stay. I’ll be back,” I said stopping her in her tracks. My comment caused the entire floor to pause and look between us as if something was wrong.

“Are you sure?” she asked looking at me with offended eyes.

“I’m always sure.” I walked away knowing once those elevator doors closed, she’d be questioned.

Where I was going, she wasn’t needed. I loved having her with me throughout the day, but this was something she didn’t need any knowledge of.

Moments after I stepped on the elevator, I was stepping off.

I trailed through the lobby and out the front door where Thomas was waiting.

I climbed in the back after telling him where to go and got comfortable.

A notification came through once we pulled off. I had a hunch on who it was and started to ignore it but doing that would only make me curious about what she had to say. I retrieved my phone from my pocket and tapped the text on the screen.

Beautiful: Are you mad at me, Snoh? You never leave me behind, no matter the task.

Me: I’m not mad at you beautiful. I just need to head somewhere alone right quick. I’ll be back to you shortly.

My response was one my woman would receive.

I didn’t know how else to speak to London.

She was the closest thing to being my spouse.

She knew everything about me and then some.

She spoke truth when she said I never left her behind.

I literally took her everywhere with me just because it had become a normality for us. When you saw me, you saw her.

The ride to The Shores was cool. It was light traffic, and the sun was sitting high in the sky.

A pretty ass summer day one could enjoy.

The only sad thing about running a business was most of my day was spent in an office.

If it wasn’t for London planning some of our meetings at the client’s office, we would be cooped up in those four walls.

Pulling into Golden Shores complex, old memories hit me nonstop. It was the ghetto to some, but it was home for me. I had the most fun ‘round these parts and caught a few bodies, too. My virginity was lost in that same damn alley Old Man Nelson was in. Them were the fuckin’ days, I swear.

“Where to, Mr. Harris?”

“Drive until you see the Blue Store. There’s a small pathway on the side of it leading to an alley. Park in front of it and wait on me.”

Nodding, he followed my instructions to the T. I grabbed my.9mm from underneath the passenger seat and tucked it in my waist. I was a nigga with money now and I knew exactly how niggas in The Shores got down. I wasn’t chancing shit.

“Thomas, you good?” I questioned referring to him being strapped as well.

“Always sir.”

I exited the vehicle and took the path. Old Man Nelson was overlooked but been in business for years. It was shock to a nigga that he hadn’t been ran off yet. Dris looked up to him so I trusted her words that he could cook something up for me.

Entering his shop, you got nothing but a dimly lit space with all types of herbs and concoctions lined against the walls.

Vines hung over the shelves from the plants that sat at the top.

His set up was everything you would expect it to be after hearing the rumors I had for so long.

I never stepped foot in here when I was younger only because I thought I was going to turn into a frog or some shit.

I was all man now with heart. He didn’t scare me no more.

He stepped from behind his curtain and his age was definitely showing.

His long hair had turned completely white and so did his beard.

His eyes were just as bright, and he carried that same expression of nonchalance he’d always had.

As if he needed anything else to solidify the rumors, he wore a long purple cloak that drug the floor.

“The only time you come around is if Adrisdia is involved. What you doing in here, Snoh?”

I offered a small smile as I approached his counter. “And here I was thinking you forgot all about me, Old Man. I just came to see you and check in on you.”

“What do you need, son? I can’t bring the dead to the living, and I can’t bring fortune,” he said already throwing out his boundaries. I wanted to chuckle and shrug it off but quickly realized he was dead ass. Whatever my reason for coming needed to be said.

“Reciprocation or the truth. I’m chasing a woman, and she plays as if she isn’t interested. I know… I feel otherwise. I need something to unveil her lies or at least return the energy given.”

Without saying another word, he disappeared behind the curtain.

Old Man Nelson didn’t give you room to joke.

He was about his business and if you stepped into his shop, you better come prepared to spend some bread.

Dris got her hustle spirit from him fa sho’.

When he returned, there was a long vial with a red liquid substance occupying it.

“This is Avow. You both have to consume it in order to be connected. Once taken, it only lasts for forty-eight hours. Any questions asked, she’ll answer truthfully.

The woman you’re stalking, you won’t know everything about her, but she will speak on her raw emotions for you.

This is violating her privacy, Snoh. I always thought you were better than that. ”

“Than what, Old Man?” I was lowkey offended by his comment.

“Desperation. That’s costing you $800. Cash, no card.”

I dug in my pocket, fishing for my wallet. I removed it and pulled out eight crisp blues, handing them over to the old man. We made an even exchange and for the first time since I entered his shop, he smiled. After inspecting the bills, he released a low laugh.

“You’re tickled. Can I ask from what?”

“Fools always make me laugh.”

“Say what now?” My face was slowly but surely balling itself up.

“Only a fool chases rejection. It was good seeing you again, Snoh.” For the umpteenth time, he vanished behind his curtain, not caring to utter another word my way.

Looking down at the bottle left on the counter, a series of second thoughts flooded a nigga mind.

This was the second time the word desperation had been thrown my way.

I wasn’t delusional and I wasn’t fuckin’ desperate.

A nigga was solely acting on emotion. I was in love with a woman who knew me like the back of her fuckin’ hand.

What the fuck was so wrong with that? I just needed to make sure this shit wasn’t one sided.

I snatched up the potion and placed it in my blazer pocket before walking out.

Moments later Thomas had me secured in the back seat and we were headed back to the job.

This was the only way to go about this shit.

London wasn’t going to tell me the truth if it wasn’t forced.

I wholeheartedly believed she would string me along and allow me to get so close that it killed me. And still, she’d deny loving me back.

“Aye Thomas, take me to the crib. I’m done for the day.”

“Are you sure? Is Ms. Geter no longer needed either?” he inquired.

“Take her the car. We’re having dinner later anyway, so she’ll need to meet me there. I’ll text her and let her know what’s going on.” As if she could sense what was happening, my cell rang with her face lighting up the screen. Smirking, I answered with, “Yes beautiful?”

“Where are you, Snoh?”

“On the way home. Thomas is returning with the car. I’ll see you tonight at Valley Steakhouse. Seven aight with you?”

“Snoh.”

“Let me know if we need to raincheck or not, beautiful. I’m tied up right now,” I lied.

The truth was I was in my head about every interaction between us thus far. I was recalling every physical connection, every glance given, every word spoken between us, and more. I had to dissect everything before following through with this shit.

“Valley Steakhouse at seven, I got it. And Snoh…”

“Yes beautiful?”

“Don’t ever leave me behind again.” She ended the call and unbeknownst to her, this was something else added to the pile of dissection.

She love you, too, nigga. She got to.

I knew women in general but then there was London fuckin’ Geter.

She made it so hard to read her and even if I could, she wouldn’t allow me to bask in it.

The way she moved, the way she talked, the way she walked…

it was unpredictable as fuck. Like now, she was saying the simplest things to a nigga but we both knew she meant more than what was spoken.

Missing me? Yeah, that was all I got from that. Not a moment went by where I didn’t make that woman the center of my world. However, she was playing the game and I’d be damned if she wasn’t the one in control.

“Don’t make the rabbit get the gun, beautiful. That ain’t something you ready for,” I said aloud.

I’d been playing it safe for far too long. With the help of Old Man Nelson, by the end of the night, I’d either have her pretty ass touching her toes screaming a nigga name or she’d have a nigga somewhere in a corner processing rejection. Dinner was about to be chaotic for both parties involved.