Page 16

Keyani

I stepped out on the small balcony and sighed as I stared up at the beautiful night sky.

It was something I’d been doing since our first night in Fiji, and it seemed like every time it just got better and better.

I’d never seen a bigger moon or so many stars in my life, and I feared I was going to get addicted and not want to go back home.

“Hmmm.” I let out a contented sigh, feeling the effects of the day finally catching up to me.

The twins had bathed and were already knocked out, snoring, and after the long shower I’d taken, I was feeling good and sleepy, my damn self.

I had no doubt that once I finished my glass of wine and smoked me a little joint, I’d be right behind them.

Cruz had worn us all out on those jet skis, but I was glad he’d talked me into it.

He’d even managed to get me to ride without the kids after a while.

I closed my eyes just thinking about the feeling of his thick arms around me and his dick pressed against my back as he showed me how to handle the jet ski.

It had been a minute since I’d taken my own advice and gotten my back blown out, and it showed.

I could only imagine the type of dick Cruz could deliver, with his toxic ass.

Shit, I hadn’t even come close to sniffing it, and it already had me shook.

The last thing I needed was to be dickmatized when I was an unemployed single mother, but damn if the thought of getting some just to take the edge off didn’t cross my mind a few times.

I laughed at how thirsty I sounded even in my own mind and knew it was about time to put the rest of my weed out and take my ass to bed.

“Fuck you doin’ up this late?” Cruz’s voice had me damn near jumping out of my skin, and he came into view just a couple of feet away.

He was dressed in a cream-colored t-shirt with matching shorts and a pair of cream and black Alexander McQueen’s.

Even with the scarce lighting, the icy Cuban around his neck and wrist glistened along with the Rolex he was rocking.

Then he had the nerve to be wearing a pair of Plano glasses that just elevated the look entirely.

Either God got jokes or the devil is busy as hell, I thought, sighing as my heart rate picked up.

“Just getting a little quiet time in while the twins are sleeping,” I managed to say smoothly, even though internally I was going through it.

He gave me a panty-dropping smirk as he came closer, enveloping me in whatever masculine cologne he had on, and I prayed he didn’t see my weak ass swoon from how delicious he smelled.

Hands in his pockets, he reached the balcony and nodded to the joint between my fingers that had gone out, but the smell still lingered. “I see you,” he chuckled, eyes roaming over my body in a way that had me feeling naked despite the satin, two-piece pajama set I wore.

“What you doin’ up this late? You’re a little overdressed for a night stroll.” I cocked my head, wanting to keep the conversation going for some reason. His intense gaze lifted to my face, and he shrugged lightly.

“Shiiiit, this is slight.” He paused to look down at himself.

“That lil’ club AJ got everybody going to ain’t worthy of no real drip.

” A twinge of jealousy hit me right in the chest, and I prayed it didn’t show on my face.

Not only was I not invited, but I knew women were going to be all over him…

especially Gabriella. My nose turned up at the thought just as Cruz’s eyes landed back on me.

Trying to play it off, I pretended to swat a bug away, grumbling lowly about mosquitoes.

If he noticed it, he didn’t give any indication, but I still tried to fill the awkward silence that followed.

“Oh, I hope y’all have fun. I heard the nightlife here is pretty cool,” I told him with a nod as I relit my joint.

Suddenly, I wasn’t sleepy anymore or high anymore fucking around with him.

Feeling as if the conversation was over, I settled into my lounge chair that was next to me, expecting Cruz to be on his way, but he remained in place.

“Wanna match real quick before I head out?”

That was the last thing I expected him to say, especially since my little pinch of weed wasn’t even worthy of a clip.

Swirls of smoke escaped from my mouth as I snickered and held it out to him.

“Ain’t much to match, but be my guest.” I had to admit I did enjoy his company and was happy he was trying to stick around a bit longer despite his plans.

“Damn, my bad, I dropped that lil’ shit,” he said as soon as I’d passed it off, sounding more amused than regretful.

“Nigga, really?”

“It’s cool, come let me in so I can roll up.

My shit better anyway.” My eyes narrowed at him insulting my weed twice in a matter of seconds, and even though I sucked my teeth so he knew I was displeased, I still got my ass up to go open the front door for him.

I stopped long enough to primp like the man hadn’t just seen me, and by the time I made it to the front of the villa, he was already standing at the door.

He towered over me, giving me another strong whiff of his cologne as he ducked inside with a grin.

He waited while I closed and locked the door before following me through the master suite and back out to my balcony in silence.

We settled into the two chairs, and he pulled out everything he’d need to roll a blunt, with me watching him closely.

I might have liked him, but I wasn’t crazy enough to blindly take drugs from any nigga.

Besides that, I enjoyed looking at him anyway.

He made light work of rolling up, and I followed the movement of his tongue when he went to seal the blunt, shuddering at the thought of him doing the same to me.

“Stop eye fucking me, girl,” he chuckled, eyes lifting from his task to meet mine, and I waved him off with a click of my tongue.

“Boy, ain’t nobody looking at you!” I let that lie out shamelessly, but we both knew that was bullshit.

“You got it, killa.” He held his hands up before lighting his blunt and taking the first pull. Right away, I could smell the potency, and it was in fact better than the shit I’d had, but I wasn’t going to tell him that.

“I know I do,” I shot back, smartly accepting the blunt from him with shaky hands. I already knew it was going to have me fucked up, so I was going to take my time. After a few seconds, he sat back and smirked my way.

“You know you hell, right?” I was only a couple of hits in, but I could already feel the effects as I shrugged and tucked my feet under my butt.

“I gotta be. Can’t have no other nigga fucking me over.

” Damn. I was already too high to be careful with my words, and even though I immediately clocked that I’d said too much, I was too high to care either.

Normally, I wouldn’t give too much to any nigga because most of them used your past to learn how to play you better than the last, but whatever Cruz had in his weed had my lips loose as hell.

That thought had me handing that shit back over with a quickness.

“You talkin’ ’bout your fuck ass baby daddy or some other nigga?” he quizzed, releasing a cloud of smoke.

Letting out a bitter chuckle, I shook my head as I thought about the luck or lack thereof that I’d had with men since Javon.

“Shit, both,” I answered truthfully, hating how vulnerable I felt in that moment.

Yeah, I talked shit to Avery about female liberation and being able to get what you needed from a nigga before moving on, but that was just a way to keep myself from being disappointed in the end because one way or another, a nigga was sure to disappoint.

I’d had them all: the ones who only wanted to come over for sex, the ones who couldn’t commit to some other nigga’s baby mama, and the ones who thought I was desperate and should accept whatever because I was a baby mama.

All of them waited until my feelings were involved to drop those bombs; it was never what they led with.

It started becoming a chore to try and differentiate, especially when I had single mother shit to deal with, so I settled for getting what I needed when I could.

No expectations, no disappointments, but even that was getting old.

Everyone wanted someone to love on them, I just didn’t know if I had the mental capacity to sift through the pissy ass dating pool to find mine.

“You ever had a shotgun?”

“What?” My forehead wrinkled at the question.

I’d been looking out at the waves hitting the sand in silent reflection, and this nigga was asking about a random smoking technique.

For a second, I thought maybe I’d missed something while I was in my head, but no, his crazy ass had just casually changed the subject.

“You ever had a shotgun, shorty?” he repeated, looking at me like I was slow or something before sucking his teeth. “Man, just come here.” I was already shaking my head as I waved him off.

“Nope, I don’t need no more of that fucking truth serum you done rolled up.

What’s the name of it anyway, so I can make sure I don’t accidentally come across it?

Got me out here spilling my damn guts.” I was being so fucking for real, but he clearly took me for a joke, laughing and shit like I was playing.

“This a special blend I get hooked up with, so I’m the only muthafucka you gone be spilling your guts to,” he cracked before suddenly becoming serious.

“For real though, it’s only a little bit left.

Might as well finish it.” I mulled over it for a few seconds, finally figuring that he was right and at the very least I’d be sleeping good and not up thinking about all the hoes he was about to be surrounded by.