Page 39 of Perfect Rhythm

SHADE

I hated how I felt. It was a cross between wanting to put my hands around Nyx’s neck and wanting to beg her to tell me the engagement bullshit wasn’t true.

But both reactions had to be tamed. I couldn’t live with myself if I ever put my hands on her, and I couldn’t be seen looking like a bitch by begging for the truth.

“So, are you going to answer my question? Or are we going to sit in this car and stare at each other all day?” I looked at my watch. “My schedule is pretty clear, so I’ve got time.”

“It’s not what you think,” she finally said. “Eli cornered me in front of my parents on purpose. He knew I wouldn’t do or say anything crazy in front of them.”

“But you did. You said yes.”

“I didn’t say yes. I?—”

“Well, does he know that?” I pulled out my phone and shoved the article from FDL in her face. “Because the love letter he posted to you online definitely says otherwise.”

“That’s just another stunt. He’s pissed that I told him I wasn’t going to marry him.”

I frowned. “Are you telling me that this nigga decided to leak some bullshit to the blogs because he didn’t get his way?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

I pressed my hands together, squeezing while I popped one knuckle after the other. “Sounds like I need to pay his bitch ass a visit.”

Nyx placed her hand on my knee. “Please don’t. I don’t need another reason to be on the blogs about something that has absolutely nothing to do with my career. I’ve had enough. Trust me.”

I wasn’t feeling it. The fact that this fool thought he could get away with spreading random ass lies wasn’t cool. “I don’t know Nyx. I feel like he needs to be taught a lesson, and this time it needs to be with a little more force.”

“No, I don’t want that.” She scooted over and climbed into my lap.

My breath caught in my throat. This definitely wasn’t the time for this shit. I was trying to be on my best behavior, and nothing about having her pussy so close to my dick went along with that plan.

“Give me one good reason not to.”

“I can give you sixty-nine.” She lowered her mouth to my neck and slid her tongue from between her lips. A shiver surged up my spine as her flesh melted against mine.

“We’re not doing this.” I grabbed her wrist and forced her to sit back up.

“Really? Why not?”

“Because I’ve agreed to respect your boundaries and be on this friendship shit. I’m going to stand on that. Also, you don’t have to use your pussy to keep me from beating that nigga’s ass. If we cross paths, that shit’s going to happen regardless.”

“Yeah, but that’s what I don’t want. If you’re truly going to be a good friend, you should respect that. I want all of this shit to go away, and that’s not going to happen if the two of you have a boxing match in public.”

“What if I invite him over to my crib and beat his ass privately.”

She sucked her teeth. “Shade?”

“Fine. I won’t touch him.” I held up my hands. “I’ll be cordial if we’re in the same room. But if he ever comes at you wrong in my presence, it’s a wrap. I’m breaking his fucking jaw. Understood?”

She let out a deep sigh and returned to her side of the car. “Hopefully, it doesn’t come to that.”

“Mmhmm.” I lowered my hand beneath my pants to reposition my dick, which was hard as a rock. Knowing that she was all hot and sweaty underneath her workout clothes only made my need for her intensify.

“You good?”

I could hear the hint of laughter in her voice, so I purposely avoided her gaze. “I’m fine.”

“You sure? It looks like?—”

“So, what’s up? You hungry?” I blurted, purposely changing the subject. “I know you just worked up an appetite in there. Let me feed you.”

“Yes, I am hungry. But I want to go shower first. I smell like?—”

“Heaven.” I shot her a wink, then tapped on the back of the driver’s seat. “Take us to The Crab Tavern. I’m in the mood for some seafood. What about you?”

Smiling, she grabbed her seatbelt and locked it in place. “Seafood sounds good.”

“Cool. Seafood it is.”

“Oh, what about my car?”

“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure it gets back to your place,” I said. “I see you didn’t utilize Demi today.”

“No, because I’m fully capable of driving myself around.”

“So am I. But it’s really helpful in situations like this. You never know when I’m going to show up and whisk you away.”

“Yeah, well, maybe you should try calling first.”

“And ruin the surprise? Nah.”

“Of course.” She giggled. “You’re always full of surprises.”

“Always.” I grabbed her hand and kissed it softly.

She smiled, then turned to face the front.

The ride to The Crab Tavern was anything but quiet. Nyx spent most of it giving Trace and Antone a hard time for putting up with my bullshit.

They didn’t seem to mind, though. None of us did. I was just happy to have her in my space for an extended period of time, again.

Thankfully, the day didn’t end after we ate.

I talked her into going back to my place to shower and change into something low-key so we could go to the movies.

Of course, she was hesitant at first, but I reminded her that I wasn’t pushing any boundaries, I just wanted to help her take her mind off the things she’d been going through.

After the movie was over, she talked my ear off and explained why she felt like it was an eight out of ten. She wasn’t too thrilled about my rating being a six, and by the time she gave me her perspective on things, I’d changed my rating to a seven point five, which she accepted.

It was almost midnight when we finally made it back to her apartment. She’d had a few drinks before and after the movie, so I knew she was a little tipsy.

“You want me to walk you inside?” I asked as we stood in front of her door.

“Nope. I don’t need the temptation.”

“I promise I’ll be the perfect gentleman. Have I not proved myself all day?”

She smiled sincerely. “Yes, you actually have. I’m proud of you.”

“Hell, I’m proud of me too.”

We laughed.

“So, do you think we can keep this up?” She questioned as she circled her arms around my neck.

“I’ll do whatever it takes to get you in the way that I want you.”

“But what if I can’t ever give myself to you the way you want me to?”

“Then I guess I’ll just have to accept what I can get.”

“And that’s fair?”

“No, it’s not. But after having you in my space and knowing what life is like with you in it, I can’t go back to anything else. I don’t want to.”

She lowered her gaze, her emotions slowly starting to take over. “I swear, in another life things would’ve been different. But in this one, I just can’t see myself going down this road again, and with you, I know it would be ten times worse.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Because I have real feelings for you. Feelings that if I give in to, and you end up hurting me, I’ll break.

At least now, I still have my strength because I’ve never felt for Eli what I feel for you.

I can recover from the shit he’s put me through.

But with you, I don’t think I could, and I don’t ever want to know what that feels like.

I’d rather live in a happy bubble of our friendship than feel that kind of pain. ”

As much as I hated to hear those last words, I understood where she was coming from.

“It’s all good, baby.” I kissed her cheek. “Get inside and get some rest. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

She peeled her body from mine and went inside.

I didn’t move until she closed the door and locked it.