Page 1 of Party Favors

Prologue

March

Wren:Guess who has 2 thumbs and another breakup on the books.

Amanda:Oh no! What happened?

Wren:Same old, same old.

Wren:I’m too wild.

Wren:I’m messy and impulsive and indulgent.

Wren:I don’t take things seriously, so therefore … it wasn’t serious.

Wren:The usual.

Amanda:That’s bullshit. You’re fun. If people can’t handle being with someone fun, then they suck. It’s not on you.

Wren:You’re just saying that because you’re my friend. You have to.

Amanda:I’m saying it because you’re a bright spot in my life, and we’ve never even met. It pisses me off when people who get you in person take you for granted.

Wren:Gah, you’re too nice.

Wren:I’m going to sew myself a ridiculous leather corset to make myself feel better. Wanna see?

Amanda:Yes.

July

Amanda:Hey, it’s our friendship anniversary. You DM’d me exactly five years ago for the first time.

Wren:FRIENDSHIPVERSARY!

Wren:Just think, it’s only been 1825 days since you sold me a 1950s teddy pattern on Twitter. Feels like yesterday.

Wren:We should celebrate. Fly out here. We’ll have a party. Or I’ll fly out there.

Amanda: LOL

Wren: We’ll get drunk.

Wren:I’ll buy us those little noise thingies you blow into.

Wren:Or sashes with our names on them. Or tiaras that say, “Best Gal Pals.”

Amanda:I do love a good tiara. Maybe next year. Did I tell you I’ve been summoned to another charity auction? Can’t remember the cause. Something to do with pigeons? Anyway, my mom bought me a dress. It’s a very respectable greige. She didn’t want me to wear one of my “vintage pieces of trash.”

Wren:Ohhh. Hot.

Wren:I bet your vintage piece of trash would be 10x better than anything that’s fucking greige.

Amanda:Thanks.

Wren:Did she summon a date for you as well?

Amanda:I’ll have you know that I’m quite interested in Dr. Ned Applebaum III. We have a lot in common.