Page 19 of Only Ever Yours

Chapter Eighteen

Hollis

How I got any sleep that night, I had no idea.

Last night with Jase, finally admitting how we felt about each other, had been everything. We had now crossed a line we could never go back from, all the simmering tension between us boiling over into something neither of us knew how to control. But there was one massive problem.

How on earth were we going to tell Finn?

The thought of even mentioning it to my brother filled me with absolute horror.

Hey, Finn, you’ll never guess what happened last night? Jase and I hooked up. You’re okay with that, right?

Technically, of course, we hadn’t hooked up. It didn’t make it any less difficult to tell my brother.

Then the fear started to creep in. What if Jase had changed his mind? And everything that had happened between us had been a mistake?

I couldn’t be sure whether the sickness in my stomach was as a result of that thought or the amount I’d drunk last night.

Shifting onto my back, I stared at the ceiling as if silently begging for it to give me answers.

Blindly, I reached for my phone sitting on the bedside table, squinting at the screen filled with messages. I opened the one from Jase first.

Jase

Morning, Princess. Can’t stop thinking about last night. When can we make it happen again? xx

A cheesy grin split my face, all the doubts dissipating. But reality was another thing altogether. It wouldn’t be so easy to skip off downstairs and plant a huge kiss on Jase’s lips right in front of Finn. The smile slipped a little.

As if he could tell what I was thinking, Jase sent a follow-up message.

Jase

I know it’s not going to be easy, but nothing worth having ever is. And you are definitely worth having, so we have to make it work xx

Jase

Assuming you haven’t changed your mind, of course?

Ha, it seemed like he, too, was concerned I had doubts.

I definitely haven’t changed my mind! We’ll have to be careful around Finn, he can’t find out from anyone except us. We might have to act like nothing’s different.

Jase

That’s going to be hard…much like I am thinking about you… winking-face emoji xx

Stop that! When I see you at breakfast, there has to be none of that xx

Jase

Guess I’ll sort myself out before I come downstairs then…

The image of Jase jerking off to thoughts of me flitted through my mind, and my core throbbed in response.

I started to imagine what it would have been like if he’d touched me properly last night, if his fingers had slid underneath my knickers and found their way inside me.

I squeezed my legs together, one hand sliding down towards where I wanted it. Then another message caught my eye.

Jase

You’d better not be doing what I should be doing… I want to be the one to make you come xx

Seriously, it’s like he’s in my head.

Instantly, my hand froze before it could reach its destination. I’d have to get off on imagining what it would be like until it finally happened for real. Blowing out a breath, I pushed off the covers and went to get a shower. And a cold one at that.

Twenty minutes later, I headed downstairs fully dressed and ready to face the day. Finn was slumped on the sofa and, from what I could tell, didn’t look as if he’d moved at all during the night. He was still dressed in the clothes he’d worn to the club, and a fusty, alcohol smell emanated from him.

I went over to him, holding my breath a little. “Finn.” Gently, I shook his shoulder. “Finn, it’s time to wake up. ”

He grunted and shrugged me off. “It’s still early, Ella.”

“Ella’s not here,” I said, a little louder this time. “You’re at home.”

His eyes blinked several times, and he winced as he opened them fully. “Fuck, it’s bright in here.”

“Are you okay?”

“Probably mourning the loss of his ex to a younger man.” Jase came into the living room and winked at me. “Not to mention the amount of whisky he drank when we got home.” He leaned over and extracted an empty bottle from beside the sofa. “Shit, did you really finish all this?”

Finn rubbed a hand across his face and yawned. “I fucking hope so; otherwise, I feel like shit for nothing.”

“Why don’t you go upstairs and get a shower?” I suggested. “And I’ll make you some breakfast, if you want?”

He shook his head and hauled himself up. “Don’t think I can eat anything yet, but a coffee would be good.”

“You got it.”

Finn left the room, and both Jase and I listened as we heard his footsteps go up the stairs. We stood there awkwardly, staring at each other, neither of us really knowing what to do.

“You’re still as gorgeous as you were when I left you last night.” Jase grinned. “Only, you’re wearing more clothes now.”

“Probably just as well. Finn might have been suspicious otherwise.” I smiled back, desperate to close the distance between us and sink into Jase’s chest.

Instead, Jase made the move. He stepped towards me, stopping as our bodies met. Lifting a hand, he traced a line along my jaw, sliding his thumb over my lips. I let out a heady sigh.

“God, I want to taste you again,” he breathed .

My heart thudded in my chest, half an ear tuned to listen if Finn would reappear. We couldn’t take any risks in the house. Reluctantly, I took a step backwards. “We can’t.”

Jase sucked in his lips, his hand dropping to his side. “Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.”

“Wait, that’s not what I’m saying. It’s just here, with Finn about to come back any minute. I can’t relax and enjoy it.”

“Maybe we should try and arrange something somewhere else.”

“What do you mean?”

“We both want this, and we also know the house is off-limits. We need to find somewhere else.”

I frowned. “I guess I could ask Ella if we could go to hers.”

“Uh uh.” Jase shook his head. “If you want Finn to find out, then sure, let’s go to Ella’s.”

Even though I hadn’t decided whether to tell Ella the truth about me and Jase, he was right. Anything we did that could get back to Finn wasn’t worth risking.

“We’ll think of something.” Jase walked into the kitchen, his knuckles brushing against mine as he passed. The gentle, almost touch caused a ripple down my spine, and I shivered in response.

We had to come up with something soon.

The day turned out to be a lazy one. Jase spent most of it in his room while Finn and I hung out in the living room, pretending to watch a film. Late in the afternoon, I got a message from Ella.

Ella

Oh. My. God. What they say about younger men is definitely true. I don’t know why I didn’t agree to go out with him sooner

I let out a loud snort, causing Finn to glance over at me.

“You okay?”

“Just something Ella said.”

He sighed. “She hooked up with that child , didn’t she?”

“A girl doesn’t kiss and tell.” Particularly if it involves kissing your best friend.