Page 29 of Only ever you-Ana & Byron (Blindsided #2)

T he air was cool when Ana stirred, the quiet hum of the lake whispering just beyond the windows. The low, piercing keow of a seagull occasionally caused a ripple in the tranquillity outside the window. She blinked at the sunlight pouring in with eyes crusted with sleep and confusion.

A steaming cup of coffee placed carefully on the table next to the bed captured her attention. The steam still rose from it as the familiar aroma dragged her closer like a snake charmer with his pipe.

It wasn't just any coffee. It was the special blend Byron always ordered for her from the tiny roastery in Didsbury. Nutty, a little chocolatey, and strong enough to wrestle her soul back into her body.

Her stomach dipped as she sat up slowly, the strap of her nightgown slipping off one shoulder.

Her heart thudded.

He couldn't be here.

Of course not .

But the coffee was fresh. Still hot.

A knock on the door abruptly broke her spiralling thoughts.

"Ana, are you decent?" came her father's voice.

Ana scrambled upright, clutching the fluffy bunny robe she'd packed on a whim.

"Y-Yeah. Just a minute."

She pulled on the robe and matching slippers with trembling hands and opened the door.

Her father stood there, the lake glittering behind him through the hallway window. His expression was neutral, but his eyes gave him away.

"Byron's downstairs."

Ana's brain stuttered to a stop. She wasn't ready.

She opened her mouth. Closed it. Opened it again.

"What-he's-how-"

Her father raised a hand and stroked her hair.

"Calm down, Ana. I called him. Or rather he called me and I picked up. Doesn't matter. He flew to Dublin because he thought you were hiding there, Ana. He just got here."

She opened her mouth to object, but he cut her off with quiet steel.

"Whatever this is, no more hiding. I did not raise a coward, did I?"

Her shoulders slumped. Shame bloomed in her chest.

Then, more gently, he added,

"Your mum and I are going for a walk around the lake. We'll eat out, give you time to do all this... talking business."

She nodded.

He kissed her forehead softly, then left without another word. She heard the door close behind him.

Ana closed her bedroom door and pressed her back against it. Her heart was thudding like it was preparing for battle .

The coffee.

She turned, slowly walked back to the side table and picked it up. It was lukewarm now.

He'd brought it up quietly and left it without waking her.

She stared down at it, then set it back on the table and padded to the sink.

Brushed her teeth. Splashed water on her face.

Here we go, she thought.

Round one.

***

Ana padded down the stairs, the familiar softness of her slippers muffled against the polished wood.

The living room was bathed in a gentle amber glow.

Towering windows stretched from floor to ceiling, framing the lake outside like a painting.

Wisps of cloud floated low over the horizon, the sun dipping gently behind the trees, casting golden light across the water.

A pair of swans glided in the distance, their grey-feathered cygnets trailing behind.

The room smelled faintly of cedar and coffee.

The stone fireplace, unlit now, gave the space a homely feel. Cushions and throws in soft neutrals made the place feel more like a cocoon than a living room.

And in the middle of it all was Byron.

His rangy body was slouched on the sofa across from her, elbows on knees, that week-old shirt rumpled at the collar. His dark hair was mussed. His face was shadowed with stubble and exhaustion.

He was still the most heartbreakingly handsome man she'd ever seen.

He looked up the moment he heard her.

And stood as his eyes followed her descent .

They didn't speak, just moved as if choreographed. Byron to the sofa by the stone wall, she to the one opposite. The space between them stretched tight with tension.

Byron's knee bounced. He couldn't sit still when he was nervous.

Then, his voice cut through abruptly.

"You ran away. Again."

"You didn't even let me, fucking hell, Ana. That picture? That wasn't what it seemed like. That was Liv. The physio, I told you about her. She's more likely to be interested in you than me."

"I believe you," Ana interrupted quietly. "That's not why I left."

But Byron was already mid-storm, barely listening.

"We had a fight, fine. All couples fight. But you should've let me explain. You should've bloody screamed at me or slammed the door, anything but disappear again. How could you just leave, Ana? How could you let me lose my mind thinking you'd, God, I thought something had happened to you."

She let him rant. His words came fast, furious, and wounded.

But he stopped when he noticed the tears streaking silently down her cheeks.

"Ana."

Never had he seen Ana cry.

"Ana, why did you leave, if that wasn't it? You know... You must know I didn't mean it about breaking up."

She inhaled, shaky.

"Oh God, it's a long story..."

He leaned forward, elbows on his knees.

"I have time. And I'm not leaving until you tell me what's going on."

She seemed to take in a deep breath. And then-

"I'm pregnant. "

His expression didn't change for a long minute. He blinked as if digesting that new piece of information. Then he seemed to pull inward, his face guarded.

"And how do you... feel about that?", he asked in a carefully neutral tone.

She shook her head. "Let me tell you the rest first."

She was silent for a moment while she seemed to gather her thoughts. What followed was not at all what he had anticipated.

"Do you remember that accident in Yemen five years ago?"

He nodded slowly.

"I told you most of it," Ana began, her voice barely a whisper now. "The PTSD, the blackouts...it was all true. But I didn't tell you everything. When I was in the hospital after the blast, they found a piece of shrapnel on the scans. It was lodged near my cervical spine."

She paused, inhaling through her nose before continuing.

She took a breath.

"It wasn't immediately life-threatening, but the location made it risky.

Too close to the spinal cord. The doctors in Saudi said the same as the team at Walton when I got back-because it wasn't causing any neurological symptoms, and there was no spinal instability or leak of spinal fluid, the safest thing was to leave it in. "

She saw Byron frown slightly, absorbing the details.

"The fragment has been there long enough that it was encapsulated, completely walled off by scar tissue. It’s like the body sealing it away.

It happens sometimes, they said. They call it a chronic inflammatory response.

It looked stable on the scans-I have one every six months. And it can stay like that for years."

She took a deep breath and wiped her tears with her sleeve, "The doctors offered surgery, but they were honest there was a real risk of paralysis. I could've ended up completely dependent on someone else for the rest of my life."

Her fingers tightened around the throw blanket.

"So, I chose to wait. As long as it wasn't causing any symptoms, it could be monitored. That's what they said. I just wanted time before... I mean if things went wrong during surgery."

She swallowed again, visibly working to keep herself together.

"But after this last injury, when I was in the hospital, they ran some scans. They think the fragment shifted. I've started getting tingling in my fingers. Some numbness, too. If it migrates any further... catastrophic is the word the doctor used. I might not get another warning."

Byron didn't move. His whole body was still.

Ana's voice wavered, but she pushed on.

"And now I'm pregnant. Which, I know, isn't ideal. But I want this baby, Byron. I want it so much. And I'm terrified. I don't know what to do, because every decision feels like a risk."

She saw him open his mouth to speak, but lifted her hand.

"Please, let me finish."

She took a breath that seemed to cost her.

"When I got back from Saudi, all I could think about was how stupid I'd been. How I'd wasted so much time being scared of my feelings. I was going to come find you. If you hadn't shown up at Cadi's that day, I would have come to you myself."

Her eyes shimmered.

"But I didn't think we'd last. I thought you'd get bored of me. So, I waited. One month became two. Then a year. Every time I thought about telling you the truth, it just felt... bigger. Harder to get out. I guess I thought... I hoped it would all just go away."

Ana let out a shaky breath .

"And I didn't want to trap you. Or hurt you. I thought, if we broke up, you wouldn't have to carry the weight of all of this. I was trying in my own stupid way to protect you. And in the process, I lied. I'm sorry."

She met his eyes at last, openly vulnerable.

"I understand if this is too much. If you don't want the baby. If you don't want me. I should have told you a long time ago. I was just afraid. I'm still afraid. But I'm sorrier than I can ever say."

***