Page 10 of Oh No! There’s an Incubus in my Hot Spring (Getting Cozy with Demons #1)

ten

Renovation Revolution

“ A nd this woman lives somewhere nearby?” Apollo asks over the instructional video of laying hardwood over concrete slab.

I turn on the captions for the video. “Maybe? I dunno. She could live anywhere really, but given the infrastructure of this house I’m guessing somewhere in the US.”

“Incredible. Is she there right now, doing this?” he asks, touching the screen. The video pauses. “What happened?”

I laugh. “This is just a recording. She uploaded this video two years ago and over twenty thousand people have upvoted it.”

“Upvote…”

“They liked it. As in, she did a good job. So we can trust the information is correct,” I clarify.

“Interesting. So other people have seen this demonstration and rated its accuracy. That’s very useful.” He touches the screen again and the video resumes. “Astonishing.”

I smirk as I watch him just for a moment as he marvels at a technology I consider common. He’s so old-timey and cute.

After a few videos, I have a good idea of how to go about this. There’s a hardware store in town with all the goods, so I load up the digital cart and do curbside pickup. I don’t want any chances of running into Mark the Fart.

I’ll need to come up with a better name for him.

It’s midafternoon by the time I’m driving back, so I hit a fast-food joint and get two greasy burgers and a heap of fries. Even though Apollo doesn’t get energy from food, he could still enjoy it with me. Plus, it’s weird to just have someone watch while I eat.

Apollo is watching a ViewTube video of a cat that’s been autotuned to sing “America the Beautiful” when I come in. I laugh as I set the bag down on the little table.

“That’s enough mindless entertainment for now. Time for some fat and flavor,” I say, turning the laptop away from him.

“The things I’ve seen,” he says, seeming both traumatized and mystified. “Is it all real?”

“Most of it isn’t. Lots of it is manipulated after the fact. Like that cat? Definitely was not singing on tune like that.”

I pull out the cheeseburgers and set one in front of Apollo.

“What’s this?” he asks, inspecting the wrapping.

“Food, for you.”

“I don’t need to eat,” he says. “You shouldn’t spend the resources on me that you need.”

I shrug. “I have some extra cash, and I wanted you to be able to eat with me.”

He huffs, a tiny smile coming over his lips for a moment. “Thank you, my witch.”

“You can stop with the ‘my witch’ stuff. Seriously, if you want to address me, just call me Sylvia, but we’re the only two people in the room, so when you speak, I know who you’re talking to.”

“Unless I’m talking to Charlie,” he says, gesturing to my struggle ducky on the counter.

“Charlie is just me…”

Apollo raises an eyebrow. “He most certainly is not.”

I raise one right back. “He’s a rubber duck.”

“One that you’ve put time, energy, and effort into. One that you’ve communicated with for years. He may be inanimate plastic, but that does not make him any less alive.”

“Uh, I’m pretty sure that makes him completely not alive,” I say before taking a huge bite of my burger. It’s mid-tier. Nothing to write home about.

Apollo rolls his eyes and looks at Charlie. “Did you hear that? She said you’re not alive.”

“Rude…”

I stop mid-chew. “What…”

Apollo grins at me. “You’re a witch. You have been since birth. When you put energy and intention into something, you make it real. Your powers are weak, so it takes years, but you can manifest your reality. In this case, a rubber duck named Charlie who cares very much about your well-being.”

I look at Charlie sitting there, all unassuming. I swallow my half-chewed bite. “You’re just fucking with me, aren’t you?”

“I could fuck you, if you’d like,” Apollo says with a suave smile.

“Eat your burger,” I say, pointing to his greasy wrapper.

“As you wish, Sylvia ,” he says, then unfolds the paper.

I look back at Charlie and take another bite.

“How’s that burger, buddy?”

“No fuckin way,” I shout, mouth still full as I jump to my feet and point at Charlie.

Apollo just laughs as he lifts his burger to his mouth for a bite.

“You seriously never noticed that I’m like the opposite of your id?”

“Bro, you’re a duck. You’re a rubber duck!”

“Stop talking with your mouth full. It’s rude.”

I spit out my food into a napkin. “Apollo, what have you done to my struggle ducky?”

He shrugs helplessly. “Nothing.”

I march over to the duck and pick him up.

“Hey, what’s good?”

“You…stop it,” I turn, glaring at Apollo. “Stop talking in my head and sounding like my duck!”

He swallows his food. “I’m not speaking in your head. You initiated the mental connection with Charlie years ago. He told me a lot about you while you were unconscious.”

“Charlie!” I whip around and glare at the duck.

“We were bored!” he quacks in my mind.

What the fuck is my life right now?

“You know what? I bet I actually died when I fell down the stairs. That’s it. I died, and this is my weird afterlife.”

“Stop being so dramatic.”

I slump down in my chair with Charlie in one hand and pick up a fry. “I’ve had my mind blown too many times in the last twenty-four hours.”

“Let’s watch one of those funny ViewTubes,” Apollo says, grabbing the laptop. “That will help you not think about it.”

“You know what…you’re right. Fuck it. Let’s watch some memes.”

I flip over to my favorite compiler and turn on his most recent video.

“Turn me so I can watch too, please,” Charlie says.

I shake my head at the absolute nonsensicalness that is a talking rubber duck and set him down so that his painted eye dots are facing the screen.

“Thanks.”

I’ve gone insane.

Within a few moments, Apollo and I are both laughing at the video. When it’s over, I remember that my entire reality has shifted. It’s not as if my life is ruined, or over, it’s just the future holds more uncertainty than I was expecting.

And that’s scary.

“Is it as scary as leaving Jason?”

It’s scarier. The fabric of my life and of the universe as I know it has been altered. Jason was just five years of my time.

“Well, you can sit there like a petrified little kitten, or you can do something about it. What can you do about it?”

Learn more about my powers and what it means to be a witch. Make a plan for how to live with this new information.

“What can you do right now?”

Get that flooring done before the move tomorrow.

“That’s my girl.”

I take a deep breath. “Ready to get to work?” I ask Apollo.

“Very,” he says.

We wash up and don the protective glasses I bought. We have to move the furniture and the reception stand into the hall connecting to the apartment, summoning more dust bunnies. When they’ve cleared out and cleaned everything up, we’re ready to lay the first board.

The first few planks are a struggle of smearing the adhesive around because there’s too much, uneven lays, and more frustrations. But after pulling them up and trying again, we finally get in a groove. We cover the main entrance with the long boards, and then Apollo uses his magic to cut the spares down to size for the alcoves.

By dinnertime, we’ve completely covered the entrance hall with the new pine wood flooring. We stand in the open door, golden sunlight pouring over our accomplishment, and marvel at it. The lighter-colored wood adds a touch of warmth and brightness to the previously dingy space. With some updated furniture and lighting, this will be a modern wonder with a lovely natural feel.

“It’s beautiful, a perfect first impression,” Apollo says.

I inhale a deep breath of pine and adhesive, then turn to him with my hand up. “High five!”

He places his hand against mine gently, and I laugh.

“No, it’s a slap, like this.” I move my hand back and smack his with a satisfying clap .

“There’s one more thing I’d like to do before we retire for the evening.” He grins. “Stay here for a moment.”

I scowl, crossing my arms, but stay put as he walks toward the room with the geode. I’m just going to call that the control room.

A moment later, the ground rumbles and a ker-chunk noise comes from the apartment. I jump—I really need to get a handle on that—and look toward the control room. Apollo emerges with a broad grin that exposes his fangs.

We dodge the furniture cluttering the hall to the apartment and he stops at the door. “Close your eyes.”

He seems excited, so I indulge him. I grab his arm and let him lead me into the room. We walk to the center…and then keep walking. Why do my footsteps sound farther away than they should? I’m so tempted to peek, and right when I’m about to, Apollo covers my eyes.

“Hey,” I grumble, grabbing his wrist.

“I could feel your resolve wavering,” he says close to my ear. His low voice sends a thrill through my body and makes the hairs on my arms stand on end.

Finally, when we’ve walked what should be the length of the entire studio apartment, we stop. He stands behind me, his other arm wrapping over my chest as he pulls me back against him. My heart flutters with excitement as his hand slides away from my eyes and multicolored light bleeds through my eyelids.

“Open,” he whispers.

I suck in a gasp as I take in the room. The old cling film-covered window is now a massive set of French doors that has a mosaic of crystals as the panes of glass. Green, blue, purple, pink, and gold piece together to make a gorgeous whole. Beside the new doors is an expanded fireplace with a crystal mantle and frame.

Light pours down from above, and I look up to see the ceiling is at least fifteen feet farther up than it used to be. The roof is just four massive, clear crystal windows. Pink-hued clouds drift by lazily in the navy sky with the first signs of stars.

The air is punched from my lungs as Apollo turns me around. The kitchen takes up the space between the new door to the yard and a winding staircase leading up to a balcony of stone.

“What’s that?” I ask, pointing to the door beyond the balcony.

“Your bedroom.”

My heart is in my throat and my eyes are hazy with emotion before I can put the immense swell of gratitude back in its box. He turns me to face him with a soft smile.

“I’m glad you love it,” he says, thumbing away one of my tears.

“You could do all this but not stick a few boards to the ground?” I ask, sniffling.

He chuckles. “I was lacking the proper adhesive. This is all materials found within my territory, and the expansion wasn’t too serious of a spatial incantation. Moving the plumbing around was a little difficult, but laying the floorboards gave me ample time to work it out.”

My brow furrows. “You were doing this while we were working?”

He shrugs. “I was planning while we worked, creating the right spells and designing the space in my mind. The execution was the easy part.”

I throw my arms around his shoulders and hug him tightly. He didn’t have to do this. He didn’t have to make my life more beautiful, more wonderful. He could’ve settled for my pleasure and I would’ve surrendered it as promised, but he chose to make me happy.

His arms band around my back and his lips find the spot on my neck that makes me moan and tilt my head.

“Did you just do this to get in my pants?” I ask.

He groans and the gentle vibration of his lips against my throat makes me shiver. “I don’t think I would fit in them.”

“It’s an expression,” I say, honestly not caring what his motivation was. I’m back in my fantasy place where I don’t have to worry about his emotions, or mine, or what the future looks like. He wanted to please me, whether for his selfish reasons or not, he did it for me.

“Your muscles are so tight, you must be aching,” he murmurs, teeth grazing my neck. “You should let me massage you until you fall asleep.”

I rest my head against his shoulder, my heart soaring and mind reeling. Jason cheating on me may have been the best thing that ever happened to me.

I sigh. “That sounds like a perfect end to the evening.”