Page 13 of Of Flames and Fallacies (Arterian #1)

thirteen

A MISTAKE

“Cap! Wait—”

I turn to face the approaching voice. Archie bounds toward us, the modest brown military clothing a size too large for his lean frame.

“We needed you to...oh. Who is this?” Archie’s eyes widen as they connect with mine. The daylight catches the dirty blonde wisps of his hair and meld it into a golden halo behind him.

Cole interjects before I can respond, “This is Kat…”

A bearded man approaches us. The man’s weathered face pulls into a suspicious expression, his long light hair swept neatly to the side as he strolls toward us. “Captain,” the man nods in greeting and flicks a hard look at me, “I wasn’t aware we were having visitors.”

Shit. The military doesn’t allow visitors.

Daeja’s weight is awfully heavy on my shoulders, and I fight the temptation to shift my posture. I’m praying to the gods she continues to stay quiet. I only know how panicked Cole is through the years I’ve known him–a very slight twitch sparks between his thumb and forefinger.

But his voice is as smooth as water. “Good morning, Carlisle. Meet my sister, Katerina. She’s not a visitor. Her mentor passed away recently, and I thought we might be able to use the extra help.”

His sister, of all things? But perhaps I don’t have to play the part for long.

“And you got approvals from the General?” Carlisle challenges.

I steal a glance at Cole and the muscle flickering in his jaw.

“No. Not yet. I planned on including the request in this month’s report. Marge desperately needs the help, and I imagine the General would approve the urgent request.”

Carlisle watches me with narrowed eyes. I’m unsure if he buys it or not. My heart hammers in my ears as I ponder what it will mean for Daeja and I if they turn us away. If we end up having to venture to the Dragon Lands alone, without Cole’s help.

Carlisle clears his throat and flicks his attention back to Cole. “I suppose we could use extra healers.”

I swallow, darting my gaze over to Cole. A healer? I have no experience or knowledge. I can try to fake being his sister, but how can I fake being a healer?

Cole dips his head. “Thank you, Carlisle. Could you assist us in finding Katerina her own room? Preferably close to mine and the outer west wing if possible.”

Carlisle blinks at the request. “We can relocate some of the supplies in one of the northern storage tents.”

“If that’s all we have, then that will work. Thank you.”

“I’ll assign it right away. In the meantime, this is for you. It’s urgent.” Carlisle hands a letter to Cole and disappears off into the camp.

The corners of Archie’s mouth stretch into a wide grin, the gesture wrinkling his brown eyes as he holds out an open hand to me. “Hi, Kat! What an honor to meet you, I’m Archie Stormbane.”

My heart races as I eye his open hand, my own slick with sweat. In one motion I wipe my palm on my side before I meet Archie’s hand and shake it. “Nice to meet you too, Archie.”

An awkward, tense silence falls between the three of us. I’m starting to wonder if Archie can hear the pounding of my heart or see the fidget of Cole’s anxious hands.

“Is there…there’s something in my teeth, isn’t there?” Archie asks and closes his mouth as he works his tongue over his teeth.

Cole tucks the letter Carlisle gave him into the chest pocket of his jacket. “Arch, do you mind securing an extra seat at breakfast for Kat?”

“Of course! Right away, Cap!” Archie bows and turns on his heels to stride back to camp.

Cole chuckles as he watches Archie go. “I keep telling him not to bow. That’s reserved for the King, but he’s adamant.”

“You have an admirer? That’s sweet.” I breathe a sigh of relief. Turning my head to the side, Daeja’s hot breath whispers against my ear.

Cole surveys around us, his voice dropping low. “That was far too close.”

I gently smack his arm, hissing under my breath. “Yes, but what the hell, Cole? Apprenticing a healer ?”

“It’ll be an excuse if we get any questions. You know visitors aren’t allowed in military outposts. So if your guise is as an apprentice, it could cover us.”

Daeja pokes her head out between a layer of my hair and tilts her head at Cole.

I quickly usher her back into the cover of my hood. “What happened to staying near the lake and reassigning patrols?”

Cole grimaces. “I might have...panicked. Look. Let’s get you something to eat, first, and we can figure out a plan. Can you leave her in the forest for an hour or two?”

“Absolutely not.” I slip a hand back into my hood to scratch Daeja. “I can keep her quiet.”

Cole’s copper hair rustles as he shakes his head. “Too risky.”

“Well, either I stay with her out in the forest and you tell the rest of your squad there’s a change of plans—”

“I can’t do that, it’ll raise suspicion—”

“What do you propose then, Cole?”

“She can’t stay with you. She’ll get the both of you killed.”

“Well, then I leave with her on my own to the Dragon Lands,” I bluff. I’m not a fan of manipulation, but I’m hoping it’s enough of a threat to convince him.

His body goes rigid, confirming it worked. At least partially.

“Trust me. I can keep her…” I hook a finger under Daeja’s chin and lead her out from the cover of my hair, then double tap two fingers against the side of her neck, “Hidden.”

Daeja evaporates from view.

A collective murmur hums around us as we pass rows of crowded tents and reach the heart of the camp. Staring eyes weigh on me as we pass other soldiers. Cole guides me with a light touch on my lower back.

We approach a cluster of long tables accompanied by groups of soldiers bent over their breakfast plates. Cole briefly announces and introduces me to the squad, before pulling out a chair for me to sit.

Archie slides a plate in front of me. The smell alone would make me groan if I weren’t surrounded by strangers. My mouth salivates as the steam off the fresh pancakes snakes up into the morning air. I grab a fork and steady myself to take small bites. Choking may be an embarrassing first impression here. The first bite melts into my mouth, and I sag at the taste.

Daeja growls in my ear, and Archie flicks a questioning look at me as he sits across from me.

I lean my head to the side to nudge her quiet. “Sorry.” I laugh sheepishly. “I haven’t eaten in awhile.”

Cole sits next to me, subtly throwing me a side glance. As Archie directs his attention to Cole, I stealthily nab a piece of the pancake and bring it up to my neck. Daeja’s hot breath warms my fingers as she sucks the food out of my grasp.

Now please, stay quiet.

Archie’s words are muffled around his mouthful of pancakes as he asks Cole, “Do you think Kat and I could be sparring partners?”

“Kat’s here as Marge’s apprentice, so she won’t be sparring,” Cole answers.

“Ohh…got it. Well that’s too bad, Kat, because you could spar with the best.”

“I don’t doubt that,” I say with a smile.

Archie mirrors my smile, his cheeks stuffed full of pancakes. He absent-mindedly flicks a knife round and round his fingers, nearly slicing himself in the process. The metal knife gleams with an expensive sheen compared to the dullness of mine and Cole’s.

“Where did you get that?” I ask, digging out any excuse for conversation to mask Daeja’s sounds.

“Oh, this?” Archie twirls the knife in his hand again. “I brought it. It’s from my home back in Helmbrook.”

Cole chuckles. “You mean to tell me, out of all the items you could bring, you brought your own silverware?”

Archie studies the hilt with a smile. “It reminds me of home.” He stabs the knife into a pancake and brings the next bite to his mouth.

My thoughts drift to Daeja. I hadn’t realized how attached I am. Until now. The weight of her hangs on my shoulders. Somewhere along the line, it became as familiar to me as the breath in my lungs. Her presence is something intimate. Something that feels like home.

As I survey the soldiers gathered around us, it becomes clear to me. She is now something I am willing to risk my life for. My duty for fulfilling my mother’s last request is spiraling into something more. Something I can’t quite explain.

Cole fidgets and shifts more noticeably with each passing breath. His fingers tap against the table. As I finish my last bite, he excuses us and whisks me away.

His voice is low as he leads me away from the tables. “You can stay in my room until yours is ready.”

Part of me is relieved. It’ll mean less watchful eyes.

As we enter Cole’s room, the both of us sag with a sigh. I lower my hood as Cole pulls the letter Carlisle gave him out from his jacket and tosses it onto his desk. The urgent letter.

“Aren’t you going to read that?” I ask as Daeja slithers out from my hair.

“Not right now. There’s nothing more urgent than you.”

I blush at the implication.

“Okay so…” Cole runs a hand through his hair. “I can’t have you stay with me because it would be odd to have my sister sharing a room. But I can’t protect you if I’m not near you—”

A knock sounds at the door.

Fuck.

I pull my hood back over my head as Cole opens the door.

Carlisle doesn’t even try to mask his pointed stare at me. “Marge is requesting to meet Katerina.”

“Now?” Cole asks.

“Unless you’d rather wait. But I wouldn’t recommend testing that woman’s patience. Are you otherwise occupied?”

Cole blows out a weary breath. “Very well, then. I’ll make an introduction.”

“Most of the supplies in the storage tent have also been relocated,” Carlisle reports.

Cole voices his appreciation and dismisses Carlisle. To not press our luck, I reluctantly agree to keeping Daeja hidden in the trunk in Cole’s room for the brief time we will be gone. Each step further away from Daeja prickles an uneasiness in my chest as Cole leads me toward the southern part of the outpost. He opens the door to one of the largest stone buildings I’ve seen here yet. The scent of honey and mint hits me as we sweep into the building. Cabinets full of glasses, bottles, and vials line the walls.

“Good morning, Marge,” Cole greets.

An old woman fixing the beds against the opposite wall turns to us. Her wiry gray and white hair sweeps up into a bun, stray hairs strewn about her weathered skin.

She grabs a wooden staff with black gloved hands, her cold gray eyes settling on Cole. “Cole. What’s this I hear of an apprentice?”

Cole’s fingers flutter anxiously. “My sister Katerina has decided to pay me a visit. She had been apprenticing for our town healer back home, but unfortunately, he died. I was wondering if during her time with our outpost she could follow you? That way she can continue her studies until she’s able to return home and find a new mentor.”

“I don’t recall agreeing to such a thing,” irritation laces Marge’s response.

But Cole meets her heavy gaze, his voice utterly calm. “Last I remember, as a captain, I don’t need your approval.”

Marge shifts her squinted gaze to me. Her staff taps against the hard stone ground as she hobbles toward us. I try not to swallow under the intensity of her stare picking through my clothes, my hair, my face. Everything in me is ushering me to shrink back behind the cabinets. In case she somehow knows Cole’s lying.

An uneasy silence falls between the three of us, until Marge looks back at Cole. “If it’s only for the interim, and if she won’t be in the way.”

Cole clasps his fidgety hands together. “Great, thank you, Marge—”

“Have her here tomorrow. Immediately after breakfast.”

“Tomorrow. Of course.” Cole uses an open palm to lead me out.

“Nice to meet you!” I call with a half wave as we shuffle out the door. As soon as the door shuts behind us, I twist to Cole with a hiss. “There’s no way I’m going to be able to fake it!”

Cole throws out a hand to silence me as two men pass us. After they disappear from view, Cole ushers me back toward his room. As soon as we open his door, my heart drops.

The trunk where we placed Daeja is tipped over. The lid is wide open, and a disarray of contents spill out onto the floor. But no Daeja.

This was a mistake.

I jet to trunk, tipping it back over and scanning the floor, picking through piles of letters and correspondence and—

Cole clears his throat. He holds the sheets on his bed up, revealing Daeja curled into a ball, her nose tucked under her tail. Sleeping.

At the commotion, she lifts her head, her eyes blinking heavily as she yawns.

My breath blows out of my lungs.

“Let’s get you to your room. I have to attend sparring soon, and it should be a bit more private than my quarters.” Cole rests a hand on my shoulder, his thumb stroking me reassuringly. “I can bring you food and new clothes afterwards.”

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

His gaze softens as he places both hands on my shoulders. “Nothing is wrong with them. But you’ve been wearing these for years. Not to mention if this is all you’ve traveled with.”

I follow his gaze down to where he’s touching me. Dark stains mottle the material.

Cole’s voice drops to a wistful tone, “I can’t imagine living in the same clothes for months on end has been very comfortable.”

My eyes round with shock. “What? Did you say months? ”

“Yes. The fire happened almost three months ago.”

My mouth goes dry, and my mind fumbles for proof of it. I attempt to recount my days and memories and…nothing. I can remember events but not the days. Or the weeks.

Or the months.

I thought the cold weather could be attributed to how far north we traveled. Not because we were at the tail end of fall. The way Daeja’s weight leaves my shoulders sore…how much bigger she is. It all makes sense. The fear of how completely out of my mind I am creeps in.

But Cole’s tender touch anchors me. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I’m fine.” I swallow.

“I know you’re not fine when you say you’re fine.” He squeezes my hand. “If you don’t want to talk about it yet, that’s okay. I’m here when you’re ready. In the meantime, let’s get you settled and with some clean clothes. We can get your current things washed if you prefer it over what we have. Deal?”

“Deal,” I squeak out.

Daeja, Cole, and I head to the western storage tent, now adjusted to accommodate our stay.

As we step inside, a damp scent of must and earth wafts over me. Small holes sprinkling the ceiling cast beams of golden light onto the floor, swirls of dust dancing within it.

“You deserve so much more than this,” Cole breathes after he closes the door.

Daeja pokes her head out from my hood, and I scratch under her chin for a job well done in staying quiet and still. I make my way around the room. The tent has to be nearly three times the size of the other tents inhabited by soldiers. I suppose it made sense, considering this was where they stored their supplies. Remnants of those supplies were still stacked in rows of wooden crates against one of the walls. Thick wooden posts support the angled roof, and Cole leans back against a thick wooden door with his arms crossed.

I toss a look over my shoulder at him. “Is it safe?”

He shrugs. “Probably the safest place for you right now.”

Hesitantly, I pull Daeja out from my hood and set her on the ground. She sniffs around the room, inspecting every corner. She finally jumps up onto the bed, wiggles her way underneath the sheets, and stills as she slips off into sleep again.

I turn back to Cole. “We can’t afford to stay here long-term. What do you propose?”

He nearly flinches at the word propose. Perhaps our history had a much heavier effect on him than I could possibly imagine.

The glowing amber of his eyes swirl with pain and regret before it fades, and he responds mechanically, “I don’t have an immediate answer. I’d need a couple of days to figure out a plan. Maybe even get a map—”

I saunter over to him. His cream-colored sleeves are pushed up to reveal chords of muscle lacing his forearms. As I get closer and closer, his fingers flicker to life.

I pause a step away from him. But the fidgeting doesn’t stop. Hesitantly, I reach for his hand and wrap mine around his, stilling his quaking fingers.

“Cole…” I whisper. “I’m so sorry for that day in the forest.”

He shakes his head, biting his lip as he looks down at our intertwined fingers. “You have nothing to be sorry for. You were trying to save your mother. I’m sorry I didn’t go with you. I should have—”

“You were doing what was best for your family.” I smile sadly.

“But you were my family, too. I wanted a life with you ,” his voice dips low, and his eyes catch mine.

Were. Wanted. All the things of the past. My face falls, and he slips his hand out from mine. Digging between the layers of his shirt, he fishes out something metal. It gleams as the light fragments off it.

The necklace with his mother’s ring.

He unclasps it from his neck and holds it in his palm. “I wore it every day after you left.”

An offering. A question. Perhaps he doesn’t hate me as much as I thought he might.

He swallows hard. “Kat, I—”

I crush myself into him, pressing my lips to his.

I love you, too. He doesn’t have to say it for me to know it or feel it.

He sighs into my mouth, easing into my embrace.

I cling to him. As desperate as someone would be for air as they drowned. Grasping, melting, holding. His hands find the sides of my face as he kisses me back. I press into him, shifting him back a few steps. His back thuds against the door, and something falls to the ground with a ‘clink.’ He pulls away from our kiss and drops to a crouch to pick up the ring he dropped.

He kneels in front of me, eyes flicking up at me. His mother’s ring in his hand.

This is the moment—this is it.

Something shuffles outside, and he frantically pushes back up to his feet, shoving the ring into a pocket. His chest rises with exaggerated breaths, and his eyes round.

His throat bobs as he swallows. “We have to be careful. Really careful, Kat. They can’t know you’re not my sister. There’s so much at stake. There’s so much we have to figure out—it…it doesn’t mean I don’t want to—” He’s fumbling for words, bracing himself against a wooden post as he shuffles backwards away from me.

I can’t tell if he’s spooked or if he’s fighting himself to keep from ripping my clothes off.

“Okay,” I breathe, ghosting a touch on his hand with a smile. As if I were calming a wild animal. “It’s okay.”

The tension in him lessens.

With a sad smile, he gazes down at our hands, now laced together. “The past few months I’ve been worried for other people: my family, my squad, the towns. But since this morning I’ve only been able to think of one person. You. I’m worried about you. Because if something happens to you…I won’t be able to survive it.” He flicks a look up at me. “Not again.”

I rest my other hand on his cheek. “Nothing’s going to happen to me, Cole.”

It’s all I can think of to answer him.

Even if I can’t promise it.