Page 20 of No Mistakes (No Mercy #2)

EVA

We’re hours into the drive, the scenery melting into an endless blur of highway and dead trees.

The car feels like it’s shrinking around me, and no matter how many times Mandy tries to distract me, with off-key singing or pointing out weird roadside attractions, I can’t shake the heaviness pressing on my chest.

The car slows, and I sit up, looking out the window to see where we are. I spot a gas station ahead of us, and release a heavy breath as I prepare to be greeted by fresh air, instead of suffocating on aftershave.

We roll to a stop, and I slip out of the SUV, mumbling something about needing the bathroom as I head towards the small, grimy-looking building off to the side.

I spot Axel standing by his car, waiting for the pump to finish. But he’s not looking at the screen or the nozzle.

He’s looking at me.

And God help me, I feel it everywhere.

He’s leaning against the vehicle like he owns the damn fucking world, with one arm flexed over the roof, while the other hangs loose by his side.

His black tee hugs the broadness of his chest, clinging to his arms just enough to make me dizzy, tattoos on full display as they snake down his tanned skin like temptation carved in ink.

The wind catches a lock of his dark hair, brushing it over his brow, and I swear to God, my knees almost give out.

I should look away, but I don’t.

His gaze pins me in place, as I replay what Gunnar told me.

He’s not the kind of guy to lie about who his heart beats for.

You’re the only woman I’ve seen knock the wind out of him, just by walking into a room.

He looks like he’s made of steel and sins and everything I should’ve run from, the moment I removed his mask. But I didn’t… I stayed.

And now I’m standing here, watching him like I don’t still feel the phantom press of his hands on my skin. Like I don’t still taste him in the back of my throat. Like I didn’t spend half the damn drive trying to breathe through the ache.

I push forward, needing to get away from everything and everyone.

I just need a minute to myself. Just one.

To pull myself back together, to silence the storm behind my ribs. To pretend like seeing him again doesn’t make everything inside of me scream for him.

The bathroom is as disgusting as I expected, but I enter, letting the door swing shut behind me. The fan whirls loudly above, but it doesn’t do anything to remove the smell from the area.

I take a second to look in the mirror. My reflection looks calm, but my chest is tight, my skin still burning from the last twenty-four hours.

I grip the edge of the sink like it might hold me together as I think about how broken he looked when I walked past him. How he stood there, holding the door open, even after I entered the other car.

I hate how much I still feel him. Hate that even now, my body remembers his touch like a brand, burning into every inch of my skin. Hate that no matter how many miles we put between us, he always manages to get close.

I take a step back, pressing my palms against my knees, trying to ground myself, but it doesn’t work.

The door opens behind me, and I turn, ready to tell Mandy I’ll be out in a minute, but when I do. It’s not Mandy standing behind me. It’s him.

Axel.

Axel fucking Ashford.

I stand up straight, staring directly into his eyes. “Ugh, what the hell are you doing in here?” I snap. “Since when were you a woman?”

He doesn’t move, just stands there, letting the door close behind him.

“You’ve been avoiding me.”

I roll my eyes, “Because you keep following me.”

He gives a slow, wicked tilt of his head. “I said I’d give you space. I didn’t say I’d pretend you don’t exist, Buttercup.”

“Oh, give me a break, Axel.”

Something in his eyes flickers, “A break? From what exactly?”

I fold my arms over my chest, “From you. I want a break from you , Axel,” I lock eyes with him, “I hardly feel anything towards you, after that stunt you pulled, the only thing I feel is hatred.” I say the words with confidence, but inside, I know it’s a lie.

He takes a step closer, not stopping until he’s right in front of me.

I tilt my chin up, just enough to keep the contact, determined not to show weakness.

“Tell me something,” he murmurs, his voice dropping into something dark and rough. “Do you still think about the woods?”

His question throws me off guard, my breath catching. I open my mouth to respond, but no words escape.

He leans in, his lips brushing the shell of my ear. “Do you remember the way you fell apart in my hands… The way you begged me not to stop.”

“Axel-”

“Do you remember how your body cried for me ?” He whispers. “The way you dug your nails into my shoulders, gasping like you’d drown if I didn’t fuck you harder?”

Heat flares between my legs, just as shame burns up my throat.

“I remember every fucking second,” he says, his teeth grazing my jaw. “I remember the taste of you on my tongue. The way you looked at me when I made you cum, with my fingers inside you and your mouth on mine.”

I close my eyes, trying to force the memory out of my mind, “Stop,” I whisper.

“Tell me to leave.” His voice is raspy while his lips brush mine with a soft touch. “Tell me to unlock that door and forget you moaned my name, like it was a fucking prayer.”

His breath is warm against my mouth, his chest barely brushing mine, and all I can feel is the heat between us.

“Say it, Buttercup,” he says softly. “Say that you didn’t ache for me last night in that parking lot.”

My lips tremble, and I hate that they do. I hate that my thighs clench, that my heartbeat races, that every fucking nerve ending inside of me is lit like fireworks under my skin.

“I… hate you,” I whisper, trying to convince myself.

He smirks, dark and knowing. “No, Buttercup. You hate how much you still want me.”

His hand lifts, brushing a strand of hair from my face. His fingers leave a trail down my jaw until they rest at my throat.

“You remember this?” He asks, thumb pressing just under my chin.

“Right before I fucked you against that tree… You looked at me like I was the only man who could ever touch you.”

“You were,” I whisper before I could stop myself.

I see the moment flicker across his face… regret, maybe. Pain. But it’s gone instantly, buried under the heat and hunger.

“I still am,” he breathes.

I shake my head. “No-”

But he moves closer, pressing my back until the sink digs into my spine. His body cages me in. Tall, broad and relentless. I can feel the heat of him, the way his chest rises and falls like he’s holding back the worst of his sins.

“You think I haven’t dreamed about you?” He growls. "That I haven’t woken up with your name on my lips and my cock so fucking hard it hurt?”

“Axel…”

His name falls from my lips like it always does… wrecked and wanting.

His hand moves to my hip, fingers gripping tight like he’s afraid I’ll disappear again.

“You ruined me,” he whispers. “That day I met you outside of the gym… You fucking broke me. And I’d let you do it again.”

I feel his mouth brush against mine, just enough to take my breath but not enough to steal my control.

“Tell me to stop,” he says. “Say the words, Eva, and I’ll walk out that door and never touch you again.”

My mouth opens, but nothing comes out, because I don’t want him to stop. I want to remember what it felt like to be wanted like that. To be needed. To be his.

“You can’t do this,” I say instead, the words barely audible.

“Why not?” His voice is hoarse. “Because I hurt you? Because I didn’t protect you when I should have?”

Tears burn my eyes as images of me in the hospital flood my mind.

“Because I loved you,” I snap. “And you fucking destroyed me.”

He exhales sharply, like I punched him right where it hurt. I try to move, but he stops me with a hand on my waist, his touch suddenly gentle.

“I never stopped loving you,” he says, barely a whisper. “I just didn’t know how to hold onto you, without breaking you.”

Silence stretches between us, neither of us knowing what to say next. I should walk away. I should scream, slap him. I should do something.

But instead, his mouth meets mine, and I don’t stop him.

It’s not like the kiss we once shared, it’s a war. All teeth and tongues as our anger unleashes on each other. He drinks from me like he’s dying of thirst, and I’m the only thing that can save him.

His hands roam my waist, making their way up to my jaw. I lean into his touch, and he moans gently from my movement.

I shove him back, his moan bringing me back to reality.

“We can’t,” I choke. “Not here. Not like this.”

He nods, but his eyes stay on me, lit by fire. He takes a step back, dragging a hand through his hair.

“Gunnar was right,” he tells me, “I would never lie about who my heart beats for. Not when it comes to you.”

He moves towards the door, unlocking it before pausing. “I’ll wait for now,” he adds, not looking back. “But you need to know, your body might lie to me, Buttercup. But your eyes never do.”

The door clicks shut behind him, but the tension he left clings to my skin like steam.

I press my palms to the edge of the sink, eyes locked on my reflection like I might find some answers there.

But all I see is a flush creeping up my neck and the wild, slightly dazed look of a woman who just had her past, and every sinful memory tied to it…

dragged up in a whisper against her throat.

He remembered every… little… detail.

But so did I.

I let out a shaky breath, turning the tap on and splashing cold water against my cheeks and wrists like it’ll cool the fire he lit inside of me.

It doesn’t do anything; if anything, it makes it worse as the heat creeps back up.

I stare at myself in the mirror, taking a deep breath before wiping my hands dry. “You’ve got this, Eva, we can do this,” I say to myself before turning to leave.

By the time I exit the bathroom, my legs are steady enough to walk without giving away how utterly wrecked I still feel. I enter the gas station, grab a basket near the door, and head towards the snack aisle, pretending like I’m not still burning up from the inside out.

I spot Mandy near the fridges, holding a can of Monster and glaring at the nutrition label like it personally offended her.

“You good?” she asks, not looking up.

I nod, grabbing a bag of sour cream chips. “Totally. Just trying not to emotionally combust in a gas station.”

“Love that for you.” She tosses the can into her basket and finally glances my way. “You look like you saw a ghost. Or touched one.”

I blink at her, lips parting.

She narrows her eyes, “You didn’t .”

“I didn’t-” My voice cracks, and I instantly shut up.

Mandy grins like she’s already solved the mystery. “You so did.”

“I just needed air,” I mumble, grabbing a pack of mini doughnuts and pretending they’re the most fascinating thing in the world.

“You went to the bathroom,” she points out. “Unless there’s a military ventilation system in there, I’m guessing you got more than air.”

I shake my head, trying to hide the smile tugging at the corner of my mouth. “You’re the worst.”

“I know. You love it.”

We turn the corner, and I let the moment settle, my heart slowly returning to a rhythm that doesn’t feel like it’s trying to punch through my ribs.

“Hey,” Mandy says, nudging me with her elbow as she eyes a shelf of overpriced sweets. “Do you think there’s a fairground nearby?”

I blink, taken aback by the sudden question. “A fairground?”

“Yeah. Like rides, games, all that cheesy stuff.” She shrugs, grabbing a pack of M&M's. “I’ve never been to one.”

My eyebrows shoot up. “Wait… never ?”

She shakes her head, like it’s not a big deal. “Nope. I know, I know. Tragic.”

I study her, shocked at the fact that she’s never experienced this in her life. “You’re serious?”

“Dead serious. Not even a carousel. Not even one of those sad ones in the middle of a mall.” She says, inspecting a bag of chips.

“That’s criminal.”

She laughs, but it’s the kind of laugh that carries weight under the sound. “It just never happened. My mom was always working, and when I got older, I had better things to do than chase neon lights and cotton candy.”

I don’t say anything for a moment, I just lean closer, gently bumping her shoulder. “Well, now it’s on the list.”

She lifts a brow. “What list?”

“The ‘make up for all the crap life threw at us’ list.” I toss a pack of gum into the basket. “Right after therapy, and just before world domination.”

Mandy snorts. “Big goals. I like it.”

“I’m serious though,” I say, my tone softer. “We’re going. I don’t know when, but we will. You’re going to get the full experience. The sticky fingers, the sugar crash, rigged games… Everything.”

“Will there be funnel cake?”

“The greatest kind.”

She hums, pleased with my replies. “Fine. But only if you win me one of those stupid oversized teddy bears.”

I smirk, “Deal. I’ll even threaten someone for it if I have to.”

Mandy throws her head back with a laugh, the sound bright enough to crack through the storm that’s been hanging over both of us lately. And for a second, just a second. It feels easy. Like maybe we haven’t completely lost ourselves in all this shit.

I look outside, and I see Axel through the window, leaning against the hood of his car, still watching me like I’m something he lost and refuses to stop searching for.

Mandy follows my line of sight, then hums under her breath. “You want me to distract him so you can breathe again?”

I swallow hard. “I don’t think breathing’s the problem.”

She grins, amusement filling her eyes. “You’re so screwed.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.”

We head towards the checkout, and I do my best to shake off the weight of Axel’s stare, but it clings to me. Just like the memory of his mouth brushing against my ear and the way my body betrayed me in that goddamn bathroom.