Page 14 of No Mistakes (No Mercy #2)

AXEL

The door groans shut behind us as Ant closes it, sealing off everything that happened in the basement.

Sunlight spills through the windows like a fucking spotlight, like it’s tormenting me for what I’ve done.

I pace the living room, not stopping until my fist connects with a wall.

My skin splits, and pain flashes up my arm. A part of me hoped it would take away from the pain, but it doesn’t touch the burn inside of me.

She’s everywhere I go. Her face flashes in my mind when I close my eyes. Her scent clings to the hallways like a ghost I can’t get rid of.

When I approached her at the firing range, she looked at me like I was a stranger. No… worse than that. Like I was the fucking enemy, and maybe it’s true. Maybe I am.

I swore to keep her safe, to protect her from everything, but instead, I turned her life into a lie and exposed her to monsters like Marco, without even realising it.

I drag a hand down my face, trying to stop my body from shaking. “She didn’t know.” I grind out. “She thought she was investigating some assholes in a gym. She didn’t know who we were. Didn’t know all of this.”

Ant doesn’t react; he doesn’t need to.

He’s indicated to me over and over that I need to talk to her. But how the hell do you fix something you destroyed with your own hands?

“She looked at me like I was a mistake,” I say, my voice low. “Like she wishes she never met me.”

Ant sighs before pulling something from his pocket, holding it up in front of my face. I feel my eyes widen as I take in the timestamp on the photo. It was of Eva, taken just a few hours ago.

“How did you-” I start before deciding I didn’t want to know. Instead, I take it from his hands, examining every inch of her.

She’s standing on a street corner, eyes tipped towards the sky as the wind whips through her hair like she doesn’t even know the world beneath her is fucked.

She looks so damn untouchable. She’s always loved the sky; she mentioned it almost every time I saw her.

I remember the forest, the day she confirmed the man behind the mask was me. We were lying on our backs amongst the leaves, her voice quiet when she said the clouds looked like a painting, and they were the most beautiful creation when they danced together like they were in love.

I told her I agreed, but the truth?

I wasn’t looking at the sky. I was looking at her.

My back slides down the wall, and I rub the hell out of my palm into my eye like it’ll push the ache out of my skull.

“How the fuck am I supposed to get near her?” I murmur, almost to myself. “She ran straight back to Boston without a second thought, and she’s probably ready to shank me if I breathe in her direction, never mind talk to her.”

I look up towards Ant, but he just holds the same expression, allowing me to release the pain I’ve been holding in.

“Even if I showed up randomly… what would I say?” I throw my head back, letting out a low laugh. “Sorry, I let you fall in love with a lie? Sorry, I handed your life to the very monsters I was trying to save you from?”

Ant takes a step forward before crouching down to meet me. He holds his phone out, pointing towards a message. I glance at him before taking the phone.

I scroll through, seeing it's a message thread with Mandy.

Mandy: She’ll be with me tonight. She doesn’t know I’m telling you. Don’t make me regret it, Antonio.

I stare at the message while the feeling of hope creeps up inside of me. “She’s gonna hate me if I show up,” I whisper.

Ant doesn’t blink. Just takes his phone and types a message before pressing play.

“You want her back or not?”

The question throws me off guard. Of course I do. I want her in every breath I take. In every version of my future.

“I’ll go, but first. You’re going to tell me why you were going to meet Mandy.”

EVA

“Are you gonna tell me where we’re going?” I ask, cutting through the silence.

Mandy’s eyes flick towards me. “Thought it’d be good for you to get some air.”

I narrow my eyes, not convinced by her answer. “You hate the cold.”

She smirks, “I made an exception. Just for tonight.”

Suspicion itches it way beneath my skin, she’s lying I can tell. This woman can’t lie for shit. “You’re being weird.”

“I’m always weird.”

I scoff, “Mandy.”

She exhales through her nose, turning down a straight road. “You know how I said I’d arrange for Ant to meet us?”

“Yes…”

Her grip on the steering wheel tightens as she glances at me, just for a second. “Just remember that, at this very moment, I am the one driving.”

I sit forward, twisting in my seat so I’m facing her as all the pieces slam together like a punch to the ribs. She didn’t just arrange to meet Ant. No, god no, because who in their right mind would want to plan first? Not this girl. She’s only gone and arranged it for tonight .

Right. Fucking Now.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me, Mandy,” I stare at her. “You’re lying.”

“Do I look like I’m lying?” She shoots back, not even blinking.

“You can’t just ambush me like this!” I throw my hands in the air. “What the hell, Mandy? You said you’d arrange it, not dump me in the middle of it like some dramatic plot twist!”

“Fucking hell, Eva, breathe .” Her voice is calm, and it makes me even madder.

I gape at her. “ Breathe ? Oh, sure , let me just take a deep breath, while we drive towards someone who was the root cause of my emotional breakdown.”

She sighs, long and theatrical. “You’re so dramatic, did you ever think about taking theatre in school?”

I go to reply, but I notice the car slowing down as Mandy turns off the main road into a car park.

Looking around me, I see a Dunkin’s and instantly start cheering up at the thought of us finally getting some god damn coffee.

Mandy scoffs beside me once she realises what I’m looking at. “Nope. Only if you behave.”

My head snaps towards her, “Excuse me? First of all, I always behave and two… why the fuck do I need to behave?”

The reflection of the headlights hitting something catches my attention, and I look to see a black G-Wagon parked in front of us.

It looks like his.

The day I found out he was still alive, he had a row of them sitting outside the house. It was like each brother had their own personal blacked-out version.

The engine of our vehicle slowly dies as Mandy kills the engine, silence falling over us as we stare outside.

“You coming?” She asks casually.

I don’t answer right away, trying to find the words to decline and to demand to go back home, but I know no matter what I say, she will do whatever the hell she wants.

Shoving the door open, I step out into the cold night air and instantly spot Ant as he exits the shadows to stand in front of us. He looks the same, dark clothes, hood up, eyes locked on Mandy like he’s trying to read what could possibly be going on in her mind.

We don’t say anything at first, instead we just stand there like the silence is heavy with all the words. He lifts a hand slowly, giving me a small wave, and I exhale, feeling all the tension from inside my body starting to fade away.

Okay… This isn’t going so bad. He hasn’t tried to kill us, so I guess that’s a start.

“Hey,” I say softly.

He nods, his expression unreadable like always, but it’s not cold. It’s just… Ant.

I don’t know much about him, only what Mandy has ever told me, but he seems like a kind, quiet guy.

“I’ll be back in a second,” Mandy says, before indicating for Ant to follow her. I don’t really have the chance to stop her and ask her where she’s going before she disappears into the darkness. I look around me, feeling vulnerable, standing alone in the empty parking lot.

Moving towards the hood of Ant’s car, I lean against the bonnet to keep myself warm, but it doesn’t take the edge off.

The cold settles into my bones, mixing with the nervous energy buzzing under my skin.

I glance towards the dark where Mandy and Ant disappeared, straining to hear even the smallest amount of what could be said.

“Fuck sake,” I say out loud, pushing myself away from the warmth to go find out what has to be spoken about in silence. I only get a few steps away before I feel the hairs on the back of my neck lift.

It’s not the cold. It’s something else.

That strange, unspoken feeling of being watched.

I straighten, turning my head slowly to look at where I was just standing.

Something shifts behind Ant’s G-Wagon, and I brace myself, slowly moving my hand towards my pocket where I now keep a knife after what happened.

A shadow steps out, and I inhale sharply when I see it’s him.

It’s like my heart has forgotten how to beat, then overcorrects and slams against my ribs hard enough to hurt.

He’s standing there, hands tucked into his pockets like he’s trying to look casual, but he’s not.

There’s tension in his shoulders, in his jaw.

In the way his eyes are already locked on mine, like he’s been preparing himself for this moment.

My breath catches in my throat, and I feel myself panicking inside.

He looks the same but also slightly different. A little rougher, more tired, but fuck, he is still infuriatingly handsome.

I take a half-step back, bumping into Mandy’s car.

This wasn’t part of the deal, Mandy told me Ant would be here. Not fucking Axel Ashford.

I clench my jaw, trying to push the rising tide of emotions back where it came from, but it doesn’t last when he takes a step closer, and everything inside of me explodes.

Red clouds my vision as I storm towards him, fingers curling tight around the knife in my pocket like it’s the only thing that’s anchoring me.

He doesn’t move, not even a fucking flinch. He just stands there, like he didn’t rip my world apart and walk away like it meant nothing.

I pull the knife free, pointing it in his direction to try to tempt him to lie to me again. “Say something,” I snap, my voice shaking. “Go ahead. Lie to me again and see what happens.”

His cheek twitching, like he’s physically holding something back.

“I didn’t do it to hurt you, I did it to fucking protect you.”

He takes a step forward, standing so the tip of the knife is pressing against his chest, his hands slightly raised like he’s not sure whether to get close or back off.

“Because if they thought I was dead, they wouldn’t look for you. They were watching you Eva. Tracking your movements. Every time you stepped outside, I felt like I was gambling with your life. I thought if I disappeared. If I became a ghost… They’d stop trying to use you to get to me.”

His Adam's apple bobs with a swallow. I can tell he’s trying to keep himself together, but I can also see that he’s failing beautifully.

“Marco wasn’t just playing games anymore. He was planning a war. And you… You were the best fucking weapon in his arsenal. He wanted to hurt me. Humiliate me. Own me. And the fastest way to do that was through you. I don’t know how he knew, but he did.”

He shakes his head, like he hates even saying all of this, but he doesn’t stop.

“You didn’t even know it. That’s the part that killed me the most. You were walking around blind, Eva. You know the job you were sent on, to follow Carter? That was Marco.”

His voice catches, just for a second, but that was all I needed to know that his walls are cracking.

“So yeah. I died. I staged it. Burned everything down to the bones. Because I thought… if they believed I was gone, they’d have no reason to keep watching you, and they’ll go back to their games.”

He looks up to the sky, and I follow his gaze to see the sky filled with stars, but it's short-lived when he continues, “I stayed gone because I didn’t know how to come back, Eva. Not without dragging you back into the fire with me. Not without reminding you of everything I cost you.”

He takes another step toward me, slower this time, as his eyes lock on mine.

“But watching you walk away from me, not just once… but twice in one day, like I was a fucking stranger?” His voice lowers, and I hear the pain hiding behind his words. “That was the real death.”

He laughs bitterly, but there’s no humour in it. Only raw feelings.

“You wanna hate me? Please do. I deserve it. I made you think I was dead. I let you mourn me. I tore your world apart and left you in the wreckage. But I swear on everything I’ve got left… I never did it to hurt you.”

We stand in silence, staring at each other under the stars, and I have no fucking clue what I should say. I can’t forgive him. He needs to earn my forgiveness, and he can’t do that with just words.

“I did it because losing you for real? Watching someone worse get their hands on you? That would’ve buried me, Buttercup.”