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SEPTEMBER 27, 2022

Nemo

He was back at the pier, one foot braced on the lowest rung of the wooden fence, leaning on his forearms, hands clasped in front of him. Scheherazade was down in the surf chasing a crab.

This was the exact same spot they’d been before he’d whisked Gem down the beach and made love to her in one of the bathing huts. It had been the hottest sex of his entire life. Not because of where it had been or even what they’d done but because of the woman herself. No one responded like her. No one gave as good as she got like her. No one destroyed him and put him back together like his sugar cat, and no one ever would.

“Fuck,” he cursed softly, hanging his head. It was day nineteen. Steel’s projection on the bet. His friend was going to lose the bet, which didn’t happen often. Nemo had thought he was nuts anyway, but it appeared he wasn’t even going to get the thirty days he had put on the board. Tomorrow, she’d be off and running away from him again.

“Nemo?”

His head raised and turned in the direction of the breathless voice. She wasn’t smiling, nor was she running to him, so he didn’t for one second believe she’d changed her mind and was going to stay.

You didn’t exactly ask her to stay, though, did you?

Was it that easy? Just ask her? Somehow, he didn’t think it was. This was about saying goodbye since she knew how much her ducking out on him the previous two times pissed him off.

He stood up straight and turned, leaving one arm leaning on the top fence rail, the other dropping down to his side.

She approached slowly until she stood just within his arm’s reach, but she said nothing. He could gather her up, hold her tight, and beg her to stay with him.

He heaved a heavy breath. There was nothing else for it.

It’s time to stand on your own, Sawyer.

“Do you remember when you asked me why the lift code was zero-seven-zero-five-one-six?” he asked.

“Yes. You said it was the most important date in your life.”

“It wasn’t an exaggeration. You were the ultimate thief. You stole my heart the moment I saw you. After that first time we were together, I hoped we’d run into each other again one day. I knew, beyond the shadow of a doubt, one night with you was never enough.”

His eyes roved her face, noting all the little qualities he loved about it. Her wide blue eyes. The tattoos along her hairline. The tiny hoop nose ring and the labret piercing, balancing out below. Her soft skin. Her plump lips. The dimple in her chin. That rebel curl that fascinated him and defied him at every turn. Just like her.

He let go of the rail and took a single step closer, bringing his hand up to grasp hers. He pulled her close, kissed her palm, then held it tight to his chest. Oddly, he thought he would have to take a big breath to say his next words, but they came out free. Easy. Because they were the only words he could say, and he wanted to say them.

“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, Gem. You’re like the statue at the Borghese. You know, the one of Daphne escaping Apollo.” His other hand caressed her face as he spoke. “Your skin, all alabaster and smooth. Your curls, wild and untamable. I feel like I’m your Apollo, always chasing, always reaching. But no matter what I do, it’s never enough to keep you by my side.”

“Is that what you think? That I’m running from you?”

“Aren’t you?” he asked. He drew a fingertip across an eyebrow and down her cheek to the corner of her mouth. “Every fuckin’ time I get close, you run. Am I right? Are you like Daphne? If I finally chase you down, wear you out, will you freeze and become something other than you are? Something I can only worship from afar?”

Gem’s eyes filled with tears. Suddenly, she lunged at him and dragged him by the arms into a half circle so that she was against the wooden pier. “Up!” she told him, lifting her arms so that her hands rested on his shoulders. Immediately, his hands went to her waist, and he lifted her as she did a short jump to set her ass on the rail, a grunt escaping him.

“Am I hurting you?”

“You’re destroying me. What do you think?”

“I meant your back.”

“It’ll heal.”

Her legs spread, she pulled him to her core, then tightened her legs to his sides so he couldn’t escape. She pulled him tight to her chest, kissed the top of his head, and then pushed him back to look into his eyes. Smoothing her hands over his face, along his hairline, around the shells of his ears, and down his neck, she eventually allowed them to settle on his shoulders. “I love you, Sawyer, but I can’t stay.”

“You still don’t believe I love you,” he accused.

“No. I mean, yes. I do believe you. I mean, no, that’s not why I have to leave.”

“Is it the women?”

She smiled and shook her head. “No. Not even close.”

“Then what is it?”

She traced the triangle tattoo on his throat. “I belong with Mythos right now. You’ve seen what the Salieri are capable of. What they’re already doing. I can’t let that go. I don’t want to let it go. I refuse to let it go. Mythos is hell-bent on taking them down, and I need to be there to help.” She stopped him from interrupting her. “I know that Tribe will likely be involved again in this mess somewhere along the line, but I don’t work for Tribe, and I’m not blind to the fact that you all have other interests and responsibilities beyond the Salieri. With Mythos, they’re an exclusive job. No other goal exists.”

She sighed and slipped down from her seat to stand between him and the wood beams. “When I was recovering from climbing up that air vent shaft, I had a visitor. It was God. I’d never met him before, obviously, and I never saw his face because he kept it in the shadows. The pain in his voice over not knowing where you were? It was almost as bad as what I imagine Midas was feeling.”

Stepping into him, she laid her hands on his chest. “He knew I could very well be willing to throw away everything to stay with you. But he asked me to stay with Mythos. He said leaving would be the wrong choice. For both of us.” Her fingertips smoothed the collar of his T-shirt. “He asked me to trust him. To make the right choice. Leaving them to be with you would be the worst thing I could do. And,” she admitted, “Waters talked to me as well.”

He drew back in anger. “Who the fuck are these people to interfere? We supported Waters when he went after Kubrick. We supported TB?—”

Her finger pressed against his lips.

He caught her hand in between both of his, pressing his lips to it in desperation. “Please, Gem,” he whispered. “I’m begging you. Do you want me on my knees? I’ll get on my knees!” Nemo knelt at her feet. “I love you, Gem. I fucking love you, and you’re leaving, and all I’ll have left are the fucking memories. Memories aren’t enough, pretty baby.” Nemo clutched her hands, pulling her to him. His arms formed a steel band around her waist, and he buried his head in the softness of her stomach. “I don’t want you to go because I want this, Gem. With every part of me.”

Her hands threaded through his hair. “Nemo. You didn’t let me tell you what he actually said,” she chastised.

Hesitantly, he looked up at her.

“He told me that when all of this was done, we both had choices to make, and it was up to us to make the right ones.”

Nemo looked into her eyes, searching for something. He knew she was trying to tell him something, but damned if he knew what it was. Then… the light went on in his head.

“No. Fuck! I don’t want to do this.”

“I know. Making choices is never easy. Not important ones, anyway.”

Slowly, he stood to his full height, his eyes never breaking from hers. He slid his hands up to her head. One hand cupped the side of her neck, and the other hand slid down to her hip.

“Gem, I don’t know… I can’t…” He hung his head. He could feel tears slipping from his eyes .

Her fingers swiped at the tears on his cheeks. “I’m so, so sorry.”

When his eyes lifted to hers once more, he knew. There was no choice to make. Letting her go would kill something in him that he’d never be able to revive. “This is breaking my heart.”

“Mine too,” she admitted.

A tear slid from her eye, and he brushed it away with his thumb. It was then that he knew she understood exactly why this was destroying him.

“Don’t cry, pretty baby,” he whispered, and he kissed a second tear that fell. “It’s not your fault. It’s okay. I’m nothing if not adaptable. I have to be because I wasn’t lying. I’m willing to accept this because I love you, and it’s what you need.” He tipped his head down, his lips touching hers, opening to her just as he opened his heart.

“Woof!” Nemo felt himself get pushed by two wet, sandy paws, and he almost lost his balance. Both he and Gem broke apart, laughing through their tears at the dog standing on her hind legs, front paws at Nemo’s waist, her claws hooked in his belt.

“All right, girl. I’ll take her home.” He looked at Gem. “She’s so bossy.”

Sliding her underneath his arm and tucking her into his side, they walked back to their hotel. Her arm curved around his waist, and they watched Scheherazade run in front of them, get to about twenty-five feet, then run back to them, tongue lolling with excitement. Then, she’d repeat the process.

Before they entered the hotel, she stopped him, hands on his chest, his hands around her waist. “You’re staying with me tonight, yes?”

He nodded. “Yes. I wouldn’t dream of being anywhere else. ”

He kissed her again, then they turned and walked into the hotel and up to their room.