Page 22 of Needed in the Night (The Fortusian Mates, #2)
MIKAS
Isla stared up at me, her lovely violet eyes wide and expression suddenly vulnerable for one of the few times since we had met.
“Oh,” she said and sat down hard.
If there had not been a couch behind her, she might have ended up sitting on the floor—or nearly so, as I would have caught her. She clasped her hands tightly in her lap as if attempting to hide how they trembled.
I did something I had longed to do for what seemed like an eternity: I knelt in front of her.
“May I touch your hand?” I asked.
She took a shaky breath. “Yes.”
Moving cautiously so I did not startle her, I covered her much-smaller hands with my own. Her skin felt like silk against my rougher, scaly flesh. The intimacy of this touch made my hearts flutter.
“The last time we were in this room, my scent told you I feel safe here,” Isla said, with a wry smile that faded all too quickly.
Her gaze searched my face. “Between that and all the offerings of berries and brandy and the fact you’re kneeling in front of me, I suppose I know what’s going on.
But why don’t you tell me, so there’s no misunderstanding? ”
I had never seen any sign that she understood the significance of providing her food and drink, but perhaps she had just now realized those gestures were more than mere politeness.
And if she knew that on Fortusia a true mate knelt before their beloved, she now suspected the secret I had harbored for so long.
She did not seem angry, dismayed, or repulsed, which was an enormous relief. Her wide eyes, shaking hands, and sweet scent revealed how dumbfounded and flustered she was.
“I believe you are my true mate,” I said, my throat so tight that my voice was hoarse. “Or rather, in my hearts and soul I know you to be.”
Her little gasp and the shimmer of tears in her eyes made my hands tighten on hers.
“Do you know about Fortusian physiology?” I asked, keeping my tone gentle. “Should I explain?”
She swallowed audibly. “I know about true mates. I’m not an expert,” she added quickly. “But I understand what that means. Your body recognized me as biologically compatible.”
“It is more than that,” I said. “Biological compatibility is only part of the call of a true mate. Our physiology draws us to one whose entire being compliments and resonates with our own in every way, and for whom we offer the same comfort. I think of it less as biological compatibility and more as…” I hesitated.
“Like what?” Isla prompted.
The soldier I had once been, and still was to some degree, protested that I was baring my belly and throat to this woman as I had never done with anyone.
Before I met Isla, I could not have imagined doing so, much less going to my knees without a second thought with all my hopes and dreams hanging on her every look and word.
I had not chosen to go to war, or to be injured in battle, or to be shipped home with a medal of valor worth no more than the materials used to make it, but I had chosen a quiet life tending bar in Onat’ras, subsisting on tips and living in a small apartment alone with my memories.
Had I not done so, I would not have been present when a rainbow-haired human woman came in early one afternoon hoping for an audition.
If that did not prove the power of choices, I did not know what would.
And so I chose to speak the truth, and only the truth, to Isla, with my hearts pounding so hard they threatened to escape my ribcage.
“Happiness,” I said. “Contentment and safety. And peace.”
Gently, she withdrew her hands from mine and leaned forward, her forearms resting on her thighs.
“You’re a smart man,” she said, with a faint smile. “Observant. Well-trained. And on top of that, your senses tell you a lot about me. So it won’t be any surprise to hear I’ve never had any of those things you’re offering.”
No, it was not a surprise to hear the depths of her loneliness and pain, but my hearts ached all the same.
“What have you known?” I asked, as if I had not already guessed.
“Mostly fear and danger.” She flexed her right wrist. A small but deadly dagger dropped into her palm. She spun it several times without needing to look at it.
In the middle of the third spin, my hand shot out and took the dagger away.
“Nicely done, Mikas.” She glanced at my palm, where a thin line of green blood welled. “You caught some of the blade, though.”
“Only barely.” The little flash of pain was inconsequential to me. “A very fine dagger, and you are very skilled with it. ”
“I have to be.” She retrieved her dagger and returned it to the sheath under her long sleeve. “I’ve lived in the shadows and by the blade. Much like you when you were a soldier.”
The ability to be honest with Isla after so many months of feigning only friendly interest filled me with joy. And truly, her perceptiveness and intelligence caused me to admire her all the more.
Her smile faded. “I’d ask why you’ve never said a word about me being your true mate, but I think I’ve worked it out. Nubo made some threats, am I right?”
“Yes.” Anger made my chest rumble.
“Damn him.” Isla ran her fingertips over mine, sending a shiver of desire down my spine. “He has to steal what he wants because no one will have him otherwise. Pathetic little man.”
I had never thought of Nubo in that way, but she was right. I did not pity him and never would, but he was a pathetic little man who happened to be the size and weight of a Hardanian mule-ox.
It had not escaped my notice that Isla had steered the conversation away from her past, so she was not yet comfortable enough with me to reveal her history beyond a few vague references. Or perhaps she was not just worried about her own secrets.
She bowed her head. Her beautiful hair tumbled over her shoulders, forming a shimmery, rainbow curtain that hid her face. “It’s been so hard,” she whispered.
The scent of her tears filled me with the desire to hold and comfort her, but I stayed where I was because I did not know if she wanted my touches.
“All I’ve wanted since the other night was a few minutes of peace with you away from Nubo’s surveillance,” she added. “Because you are my friend.”
She fell silent for a while.
“I think I knew,” Isla said finally, her voice quiet.
She raised her head and met my gaze, her face streaked with tears.
I yearned to kiss them away. “Subconsciously, I mean. I always looked forward to ending my set and coming to the bar to drink and talk with you. Those were my most peaceful hours, even though I still had to be on my guard. I know humans don’t have true mates, but we still have instincts.
I guess mine were doing their job. They told me you were safe. ”
Warmth and joy spread through my body. I took her hand and bowed my head over it. “That is the greatest compliment I have ever received, Isla. If all I could be to you is a place of safety, I would accept it.”
“Give me a chance to process it all.” She tipped my chin up with her free hand. “I will admit, it doesn’t feel as overwhelming as I would have thought.”
I could not help myself; I moved closer, nestled my head in her lap, and closed my eyes so I could lose myself in her scent and the sensation of her dress and skin against my face. My chest rumbled in contentment.
“I like that sound you make,” she murmured, running her fingers through my hair and along the back and sides of my neck. Nothing had ever felt so good as her caress. “Will you be offended if I say it sounds like you’re purring?” she asked.
“No.” My voice was barely a whisper. “I am not offended.”
For a long, blissful time, her fingertips explored my scalp and the back of my neck, stroking my scaly skin and twirling my hair languidly between her fingers. When she slipped her hand into the opening on the back of my shirt and gently caressed my spines, my knees grew weak. Gods above.
“Can I ask what the source is of your nonhuman DNA?” she asked.
Her tone was curious and affectionate, so I did not feel self-conscious or resistant to replying as I might have been with anyone else.
“I am an amalgamation,” I said. “As you may have guessed, I have primarily reptilian characteristics. These come from the Pallasian bosor. I also have genetic material taken from mammalian species on J’Nora and Muravai.”
Isla’s hand stilled. “The bosor?”
I raised my head. She appeared startled, but not afraid or dismayed.
Even so, I was quick to add, “I have fangs, but I do not have venom. You do not need to fear me in any way, Isla. I swear it.”
“I believe you.” She urged me to rise to my knees again and cupped my face with her hands. I leaned into her touch.
Her smile turned mischievous. “You’ve been honest with me, so I’ll be honest with you: I wasn’t thinking about you having venom. I probably should have been, but I wasn’t. I was thinking about a very different characteristic of Pallasian bosors.”
Before I could process her words, she slid from the couch to my lap, her knees astride my thighs. I caught her, my hands under her hips. My hearts thundered in my chest.
Her expression solemn, she reached up and tucked my hair behind my ears. “Lift me up a bit,” she said. “Let me try something.”
I did as she asked, reveling in all the wondrous sensations of holding her in my arms as her inner thighs pressed against my abdomen.
She slipped her hand through my hair to cup the back of my head, drew me close, and kissed me.
Her lips were perfect and soft and she tasted of brandy and jampa berries and Isla . Even my most vivid fantasies had not done justice to her kiss.
Everything else in the universe faded away.
I had never kissed a human woman before. In fact, I did not recall kissing any member of any species. Humans were not unique in the galaxy for their desire to touch their lips, but I had never bedded anyone who shared that trait. And I found myself immensely grateful for that .