Page 92 of Nanny for the Bodyguard
The wind has picked up, and a cloud has gone over the sun, making the heat a little bit more bearable.
“Okay, I trust you. And it sounds like you're trying to be smart about this, so I'm going tobelievethat everything is fine, but the moment something gets funky, you have to call me, okay?”
I nod at her. “Yes, of course. I will always call you, and I'll be better about it, I promise.”
Olivia offers me her classic smile, her worries assuaged for now. “Good. Now, let's talk aboutmefor a little bit.”
Our pace picks up, we finish our coffees, and I throw the empty cup in a garbage can, listening to Liv go on about her latest clients and the time that she spent at the library.
The new guy seems to have helped quite a bit, and her load is a lot better.
But I know I'm not really listening, not entirely.
My mind is too wrapped around everything Olivia just said. I'm shaken by what she laid out for me.
What if she's right? What if there is nothingrealbetween Easton and me, and as soon as the danger is gone, he leaves just like before?
I know that I've been worried about this for ages. But I'll admit that the desire to be with Easton has started to overpower those worries lately.
Right now, they all come rushing back to the surface.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do about the feelings that are swirling through me, but I do know that it will get harder and harder to make a clean decision the longer I'm around Easton.
Maybe if I took some time away back at my apartment that I haven't been using, I'll be able to think clearly. It'll put everything in perspective.
Because one question looms over my head stronger than all of the others.
Am I doing the right thing?
THIRTY-ONE
Hazel
At this point, someone should give me a fucking Oscar for how good of an actress I have been, not only all day but ever since I ran into Easton.
I know I need to go back to my apartment to clear my head, to wrap my brain around everything that's going on, and I've made up my mind to do so.
But I'm not about to make Easton feel bad for it or, worse, make Jade feel like she did anything wrong, because she didn't. I adore her.
She's one of the best kids on the entire planet, and it would bring me nothing but joy to be her nanny, her babysitter, her whatever. Forever.
But it's too hard to make a decision right now, being around her uncle.
Logic and fear and the past and Olivia's words are all telling me that I need to slow this down and take some time for myself, to physically put some space between us.
And even though I've made up my mind about that, I will admit that my stomach is in knots, and my chest feels like it's in a vice.
You can do this, Hazel. Just put one foot in front of the other. You got this.
I got back to the house, and we went about our day just as I thought we would, but both Jade and Easton seem to notice that something is up at dinner because I'm unusually quiet.
To make up for it, I suggest putting on a movie, citing that the sun really wiped me out when I went on my walk with Olivia.
“Yeah, sorry, guys. I'm just drained from being out in the bright sun like that all day. Really knocked me on my ass. Excuse me, butt. I will put a dollar in the swear jar.” I hold up my hands in surrender as Jade eyes me. “How about we just relax to a movie for the rest of the night, and then I can tuck you in, Jade?”
She gives me a smile, going to get the swear jar, and when she comes back, I stick a dollar in it from my pocket, and she nods.
“Okay, a movie sounds fine, but I get to pick.”
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