Page 87 of Nanny for the Bodyguard

And my stomach drops just a little bit.

When I glance over at Easton, he's taking a massive bite of his sandwich, and a little bit of mayonnaise gets stuck on his lip. He licks it off and then grabs a napkin from inside the blanket.

All I can do is smile.

We're supposed to be faking this, but it doesn't feel fake anymore.

Part of me wants to run. My brain is settling on the fact that he didn't come back all those years ago.

And then I see this man in front of me.

I see this man who is doing so much to try to keep me safe and has mayonnaise stuck to his five o’clock shadow.

“Huh.” He perks up, glancing at me with his brows pulled together. “What are you looking at?”

“You. You got it there, or do you need another napkin?”

He laughs, rolling his eyes as the sunlight catches in his auburn hair. “I'm fine. You put a lot of mayonnaise on this.”

Rolling my eyes right back at him, I reach inside the bag and pull out the packet of wet wipes that I added just in case somebody got sticky.

“Well, here you go. These were supposed to be for the ten-year-old, but I think you need them.”

“You bum,” he complains playfully. And I smile so big my cheeks start to hurt.

It doesn't feel like we're pretending anymore, and I don't know what to do about that.

Going back to my sandwich, I let the conversation lull again. My brain is churning all over again, unable to stay steady or keep me from agonizing over every little thing.

Isn't this supposed to be casual? Isn't casual safer?

With Neil escaping from prison and potentially headed in my direction, with every bit of our history working against us, isn't a fully fledged relationship between the two of us a dumb idea?

I mean, who would do something like that? It's not like the circumstances say, “Yes, this is the perfect time to get involved in a relationship with your ex-boyfriend who you dated incollege.”

And then I look over at Easton again, and that buzz in my stomach fills me like it always does. I don't know if any ofthose logical ideas will keep me from following what my heart is pulling me towards.

“What’re you thinking about?” I ask as I look at Easton, who seems to be as deep in thought as I am.

He sighs. “You. Us.”

This isn't really the best place to have this conversation. Jade is still lying on the blanket, coloring in her book. So the both of us just let things go quiet, and eventually, Jade runs off towards the playground, intent on going on the swings for as long as she can.

I glance over at Easton just as his eyes find me, and we both laugh.

“Well, should we talk about this?” he asks.

We're still in a public place, in the park, so I try to steer the conversation carefully.

“Well, maybe we should determine what our next steps are with the entire Neil situation. He's still on the loose. And I'm worried that he's going to catch up to us at some point.”

Easton sighs and sets his sandwich to the side. He's almost finished with it anyway.

Scooting across the blanket, he gets as close to me as he can without making me feel too pressured, and then he reaches for my hand and entwines his fingers with mine.

“I know you're scared, Haze. I understand. You have every reason to be, but we're going to figure this out. He’spotentiallycoming. But there's no way of knowing if he knows exactly where we are, and we're going to make sure that the house and you and Jade are as safe as possible. He's not going to get to you.”

I allow myself to be comforted by his words for only a moment before my anxiety peaks again, and the words tumble out of my mouth before I can stop them.