Page 127 of My Solemn Vow

Valor hesitantly reaches out and runs his hand over my head.He huffs, inching closer, then he sighs out a massive exhale. “You need to stand. Come on. It’ll feel better once you move. Don’t overthink it. Don’t fight her. Just stand.”

‘Just stand,’ he says. ‘It’ll feel better,’ he says.I close my eyes and think upward, following the fever dream that’s apparently not actually hell.

My mind flashes back to that conversation.‘To be gifted a wolf, you need to practically die.’And now I’m here. I almost died in his basement, only to end up here. Wherever the fuck here is.

Trust me, a new voice says.

I open my eyes, turning to look around, but no one’s there. It’s just me and Valor out in what appears to be the middle of nowhere.

Valor cocks his head.

Relax and trust. I won’t ever let him hurt you again. We’ll tear him limb from limb.Her voice is strong. She feels ravenous, and I believe her.

I let go and just feel. My body moves, and it’s so freeing to take steps, walking away from him. It takes a minute, and soon I hear her voice again.Lead the way.

To think and to move is as easy as it seems. Two steps, then three, darting left and right. It’s a full sprint, running to destination unknown, leaving Valor in our past.

Until his large black wolf comes running up alongside me. I push to move farther and faster, but he’s constantly there, chasing. I turn hard, going back the way we came, but he spins alongside.

Just go the fuck away,I think.

Valor cuts in front of me, coming to a stop, forcing me to come to a full halt.

I try to walk past him, but he snarls at me, and the wolf in my mind snaps. She lunges forward, and our teeth sink into him, reaching for skin, but we come back with a mouthful of fur rather than blood.

It’s not enough for her. It’s not enough for me. We charge, surging forward once more, and when we connect this time, it pushes him to the ground, throwing him off kilter. Valor doesn’t fight back.

He lets the wolf within me, the wolf I’m within, get ahold of him at the neck by his shoulder. The taste of blood hits my tongue, filling my mouth. My jaw clamps down, pushing farther. But even then, Valor doesn’t fight back.

Attack after attack, Valor accepts the beating we give him. The pain we inflict on him until all that’s left of my energy is panting and wobbly feet.

I collapse to the ground, and when the darkness comes, with it comes peace.

55

VALOR

THE AFTERMATH

I deserved it. Every bite and scratch. Hell, I probably deserve that ten times over. But she’s weak, still coming into herself. The newly minted wolf only has so much strength.

It’s been days of fighting. But this is the first time Antonella has seemed alert.

When her wolf retracts, she collapses, unconscious. My gorgeous mate’s long hair puddles in the snow around her.

For a flash, I remember the blood, but I force myself back to the present, to her.

It’s easy enough to scoop her up into my arms and walk across the yard to my family’s hunting lodge. I set her on the bed by the wood stove to warm up and then close the door behind us.

Antonella stirs when I pull a blanket over her. When she curls up into a ball, refusing to look at me, my guilt intensifies.

I pull on my sweats and sit next to her feet. “Can we talk?”

“I’m thinking annulment. I get my money, you keep yours, and we pretend we never met. I’ll find a new teaching job, and you can fuck all the way off.” Her words are sharp with a cutting edge.

“No.” I shake my head and scrub my hand down my face, covering my mouth.She’s never going to forgive me. Not like I’ll forgive myself either.“No annulment. Yes, you can keep your money, you can have my money too. There is no pretending we never met. And Rothschild-McClintock Magnet School will never fire you.”

She closes her eyes and sits up, her body wobbling for just a second as she stabilizes. “Did you find Royal?”