Page 9 of My Cowboy Kiss (Lucky River Cowboys #4)

Courtney

I’m almost finished putting on my makeup when River walks into the living room freshly shaved and yawning. I know he’s as tired as I am.

We woke up in the middle of the night and talked for a while. I can’t help thinking about what happened next. Neither of us slept with any clothes on and he entered me from behind. The entire time he was pumping into me, he stroked my clit. Even while he was coming, he didn’t stop.

I cross my legs, squeezing hard at the erotic memory, at the feel of his come filling me.

He moves to where I’m sitting on the sofa where I get enough decent morning light to apply makeup and kneels on the rug in front of me. Looking into my eyes, he takes my hands in his and presses a kiss to each one.

“I’ll be out in the far pasture today so I’m not sure what kind of reception I’ll have. But if you need anything, even if you just want to chat, call the house and someone can come find me. I’ll ride back closer to the house to get a signal.”

I brush a lock of hair from his forehead. “If you’re trying to make sure I’m okay, I am.”

“You don’t regret?—”

“No,” I interrupt before he can finish. “My thoughts are all over the place and my heart feels strange, but I’ll never be sorry about last night.”

He thinks about that for a second before he nods and rises. “I’ll make you breakfast while you finish.”

I swipe lipstick on, then drop the tube into my purse. After I get a light jacket from the closet, I say, “I’m done, and I don’t want to eat.”

“I’ve told you before. You never eat enough,” he scolds.

“That’s not true. You’re comparing me to you, but you do the work of two men.”

“Do you know what my new favorite thing to eat is?”

I can feel my cheeks flaming. I’m not embarrassed by anything we did but there’s a small sliver of awkward awareness in the room as I try to adjust to the change between us. I saw my best friend naked. I did mind-blowing dirty things with him. He had his tongue and his cock inside of me.

“No comment?” he teases. “Will you be this embarrassed next time too?”

“Next time?”

The smile on his face fades and he looks uncertain. “You don’t want a next time?”

“I do!”

He grins at my enthusiastic reply. And it’s amazing to me how before-sex-together River could look at me and I was fine. But after-sex River looks at me the same way and there’s a new meaning behind it and I’m not fine. I get insta-horny and want to tattoo my name all over him.

“I have to go before I’m late.” Then I remember that my car is still down. I take out my phone and River stops me.

“I’ll drive you and then have someone put a new battery in and leave it in town for you.”

“Thank you for handling that. I’ll leave my debit card with you.”

“I don’t need it.”

I know every penny is needed for the ranch because of what my uncle did. I know how the family is struggling to pay the bills. The guilt I feel burrows deeper.

I can’t add my costs to the load already on his shoulders and as soon as we’re in his truck, I take my card out.

“Courtney, I said I can do this for you.”

“Lift up.” I try to snake my hand beneath his ass to feel for the wallet in his back pocket.

He won’t budge.

I sigh. I’ll just have to do it another way.

I find that other way once he pulls up in front of my building to let me out. I climb from the truck, then spin and toss the card onto the seat before slamming the door with satisfaction.

My hand is on the handle of the office door when River catches me. He pulls me close and kisses me so thoroughly that my knees get wobbly.

Then he steps back looking cool and calm while I’m still reeling. “I said I’ll do it. I’ll see you later.”

His truck is pulling away from the curb before I realize my card is in my hand.

I step into the office and catch Stacy turning away from the window.

“I don’t know how you managed to snag him,” she says with a smile, but it’s coated with jealousy.

There’s so much I could say but I don’t want to have a conversation with her. I murmur something and breeze past her to my desk.

It’s freezing in here. Someone else must have turned the air lower because Allison keeps it strictly regulated to a low roasting level.

I put on my jacket and tuck my hands into the pockets. Something crinkles under my fingers, and I pull out the paper, then wish I hadn’t. It’s a note I’d written months ago where I’d tallied how long it’ll take me to pay off the money my uncle stole from River’s family.

Unless I get a second job, I’m looking at a lot of years down the road. But it’s the right thing to do.

You think you deserve a better life than what I gave you? Well, you don’t. You’re just like me. Ain’t nobody gonna stick around and love you.

When my mother’s words pop into my head, I ball my hand into a fist, squeezing hard. My fingernails bite into my palms.

If our relationship progresses, will River stay for the long haul? Or will he grow weary and learn how hard I am to love?

With my family having an addiction gene and thieving tendences, being with me could end up hurting him.

But I can’t tell him that I don’t want to see him again. First, that would be a lie. Second, I hate movies where one character says they can’t be with the other “for their own good.”

To me, that’s the height of trying to control the other person. So why don’t I come clean to River about my connection with my uncle?

Because I’m a coward.

I confronted the truth when I was a child and learned that speaking up can bring consequences. Painful ones.

I had told my mother I wanted to know who my father was so I could go live with him instead of her.

“That bastard don’t want you.” She’d spat the words out harshly. “If you go looking for him, you’ll be sorry.”

I know I have trust issues. I don’t trust love. But I do trust River and what happened between us wasn’t a mistake.

My heart starts beating faster. No, it wasn’t at all. It was perfect because of who he is. I bite down on my lower lip. But what will happen when River finds out who my uncle is? What if he thinks I’m a mistake?

River

Marshall is on the front porch sipping from a mug when I pull up. He studies me, then says, “You spent the night out?”

I nod and head inside to get coffee to take with me.

He follows me in. “Courtney? I figured as much,” he says, not waiting for confirmation. “Everyone and their brother knows how you feel about her.”

A black kitten darts out of the mud room to fling himself at my pants, sinking his claws in as he starts to climb my leg.

“What’s the problem, Captain Claws?” I rub behind his ears.

“He’s new. Where’d that one come from?”

“Brought him in last week,” I say as the kitten bumps his head beneath my chin and purrs loudly.

Marshall shakes his head. “Your cock is going to have issues with a new face.”

The rooster I rescued doesn’t like it when I bring home new rescues. He likes to follow me around and acts like he’s a guard dog.

“It’s going to get chaotic when he sees the kitten.”

“They’ll find their way around each other.”

Captain climbs up to my shoulder and sits purring in my ear.

“Everything okay with the wife?” I ask. “You getting divorced?”

His expression tightens. “It’s a long story.”

“We’ve got time as we ride.” Marshall and I were close at The Gentle Home for Children. He’s always tried to look out for me, and I look out for him. I’ve always been thankful we were adopted together.

“I don’t really want to discuss it.” He waits while I put Captain down and make my coffee in a to-go mug. Then we walk out together and the rooster falls in step with us as we head to the barn to saddle up.

“Okay.” He’ll talk when he’s ready. Marshall takes the time to look at something from every angle before he talks about it. He’s good at solving problems.

“But I do want to know if you and Courtney are dating now.”

“Why?”

“Because we have a bet going. It’s split half and half. Some of us think she’ll fall for you, but the others think she’s going to boot your ass back over the friendship line.”

“That won’t happen,” I say with confidence. I can’t explain why I feel so sure. I just do. Maybe because I believe even if we part ways, we’re going to find our back to each other eventually because when two people are meant to be, fate will keep putting them on the same path.

We were good together last night and there’s no denying that. But there was nothing from her indicating she wanted anything except sex moving forward. I don’t think I’ll be able to concentrate today unless I can nail down what she wants.

I finish tightening the saddle and as Marshall is checking his horse, my rooster starts eyeing him and puffing up his feathers.

“River, I swear, you better teach this bird who he needs to leave the fuck alone.”

I pick up the rooster and direct him back to the house then take out my phone to send Courtney a text: Let’s go on a date tonight .

She texts back : Are you asking to come to my place?

No. Let’s go on a real date, I respond, then start counting the seconds for her answer. Did she get the text? Why is it taking her so long to answer? I check my phone to make sure the text went through. It did.

“You ready?” Marshall swings up into the saddle and pulls the brim of his Stetson low.

“One second.”

My phone pings. Sorry. Allison came to my desk for a second. Okay.

Okay let’s go on a date?

Yes.

I stare at the word, then grin and pump my fist, exhaling with relief.

“I’m guessing I’m on the winning side of that bet,” Marshall says. “Unless you screw up and it falls apart,” he teases.

“I won’t.” This is too important. She’s important and tonight, I’m going for it. Balls to the wall. I’ll tell her that I’m crazy for her. That I’ve always loved her—only her—and that won’t ever change.