Page 11 of My Cowboy Kiss (Lucky River Cowboys #4)

Courtney

Two days have passed since River asked me to marry him and we decided that I would move in with him at the ranch. I’m more than agreeable to that because I’ll save the money I would have spent on rent. I can use that to pay toward the money my uncle stole.

I still haven’t told River or his family about my ties with my uncle, but I’m planning to do that tonight after supper. I don’t want to have any more secrets.

I smile thinking about his family. When we told them we were getting married, Frances cried and hugged me saying she’d always thought of me as family.

I’m humming as I tape together another moving box.

I’ll get all the packing done while River’s working at the ranch.

Then tonight when he’s finished, he’ll drive over, and we’ll load up the big stuff and what I need for the weekend.

Anything that won’t fit in his truck, I can move myself during the week after work.

The doorbell rings and I put down the box tape and answer, wondering if River managed to rework his schedule after all.

When I swing it open, it’s my mother standing there. While she’s not drunk, it’s clear she’s already had a few. The scent of alcohol wafts from her as she pushes by me without waiting to be invited in.

“I need money,” she says in that demanding way of hers.

“I don’t have it. I’m saving for my wedding and I’m repaying the money that my uncle stole.”

My mother cackles loudly. “Wedding? To who? River? You think he’ll still want you when he finds out it’s your father who nearly ruined his family?”

“You mean my uncle,” I say slowly.

“He’s not your uncle. That low down bastard is your father. He told me he was working a long con, but I didn’t know it’d be that much money. I can’t believe he had the gall to steal all that and didn’t give me a damn penny of it.”

My legs can’t hold me up anymore and I slide to the floor. “My…father? No.” I shake my head vigorously. “It can’t be.”

My mother smirks. “I was there. I ought to know who your damn daddy is. You need to get those wedding ideas right out of your head. River ain’t gonna want you.” She sends me a sly glance. “Since you won’t be getting married, you sure you don’t have any money for me?”

“Get out.”

Her eyebrows lift in surprise at the harshness of my tone. “Don’t you go acting all high and mighty. I might be a drunk, but I was a good mama. I put food on the table and?—”

I can’t stand any more of her lies. She wasn’t a good mother. I went hungry more often than not. I lived in fear of the men she’d bring home.

“Get out!” I scream. “Or I’ll call the police.”

She gets up and ambles out but slams the door behind her hard enough to rattle the windows.

I wrap my arms around my knees, rocking back and forth on the floor. I stay that way as the day seeps into night. Somewhere my phone rings but I don’t answer it.

I’m the daughter of the man who betrayed the man I love. I feel awful. Dirty. Shameful. My heart is fracturing. River isn’t going to want me. This news will upset him and make him look at me differently.

I won’t be able to stand that.

My phone rings again and I crawl on my hands and knees to find it guessing it’s probably River. I might as well get this over with.

“I’m leaving now heading to you.”

I grip the phone tightly at the sound of his voice. “Don’t.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I know you’ll want to break up with me so let’s just say goodbye over the phone. I don’t think I could stand seeing you face to face.” That’s all I can manage to say before breaking down. I disconnect the call and don’t answer when it rings back.

I cry because I don’t want to hurt River. I cry because I’m hurting. When I didn’t know who my father was, I imagined he was a hero somewhere who didn’t know I existed. Otherwise, he would have rushed to find me.

I sob until my eyes are swollen and my throat sore, then I drag a throw pillow from the couch and lie curled on the floor.

Less than ten minutes later, there’s a ferocious banging sound on the door. Someone is pounding on it with a fist.

“Open the door, Courtney! I’m not leaving until you do!”

I debate on whether or not I should then realize that hiding isn’t going to make the breakup hurt any less.

I get up and switch on the overhead light, blinking at the sudden brightness filling the room. Then I open the door and step back as River barrels in.

“Like hell am I breaking up with you. Why’d you say that on the phone?” He clutches my arms, his eyes wide as he scans me. “Was it your mom? Did she say something? Did she hit you? What happened?”

I wish I could lean against him and let him wrap his arms around me. I stiffen my back and push his hands away. “Yeah, she was here. No, she didn’t hit me. There’s no use talking. You should go.”

He pushes the front door shut with his boot. “No.”

I hug my arms around my body and turn away from him. He spins me right back around to face him.

“We don’t run away from stuff.”

“Who’s we?”

“You and I are. Whatever happens, we deal with it together. Now what’s going on?”

“You’re going to want to break up once you know and?—”

“Bullshit. Tell me.”

“I thought the ranch manager was my uncle,” I say. “I’ve known for a while and purposefully kept it from you.” Nausea rolls my stomach at the admission.

He blinks. “What?”

I was right. River looks shocked.

“Once I found that out, I started depositing money into your family’s bank account trying to atone for his actions. But it turns out, he’s not my uncle at all. He’s my father. My mother told me that tonight.”

River’s expression tightens and he rubs the corner of one brow. “You think I want to break up because of who your family is?”

“Yes. Because I know how much it hurt all of you when he betrayed you.”

“So?”

I swallow. “You’re angry.”

“No, Courtney, I’m not angry. I’m bewildered. You thought you had to hide this because you didn’t trust me enough to tell me.”

“I didn’t want to lose you…our friendship at the time.”

“You do realize that I don’t even know who the hell my biological parents are, right? I was left at the Home. But who they were or are has no bearing on who I am. On who I get to choose to be. I would never blame you for what your uncle or father or whoever the hell he is says or does.”

He takes a breath and puts his hands on his hips, his jaw tense. “You didn’t trust me.”

“I’m sorry,” I say. “This is all on me. I have a hard time trusting and?—”

He sighs and pulls me into a hug, cupping his hand on the back of my head. “It also bothers me that you had this burden on you. I’m upset with myself too for not paying closer attention. For not seeing that you were hurting.” He kisses the top of my head.

I cry against his chest for my fucked up family lineage and how it impacted River. I cry for how it impacted me. And I cry for the fucked up way I handled everything.

“I don’t want you to break up with me,” I say between sobs.

“That thought never crossed my mind,” he says, hugging me tighter. “You and I are going to get married and have lots of sex, lots of kids and lots of laughter.”

“You can see the future now?”

“Didn’t I tell you I’m a fucking wizard?”

I laugh and then he wipes my tears with his thumbs before kissing me. The tension drains from me. River loves me. He’s not leaving. My world is okay.

River

Courtney fit into our lives at the ranch like she’d always lived there. The month since we’d moved her out here flew by and now we’re standing in our favorite spot by the river with our family around us. We kept our wedding small with just family because that’s how we both wanted it.

The scent of wildflowers hangs in the air. The river gurgles below us. It’s our little slice of heaven in the country and we wanted our married life to begin here where we first started falling in love.

I’m standing under an arch my mother had made of twisted tree branches threaded with flowers. I’m a nervous wreck waiting for Courtney to exit the tent we set up for her to get ready in.

My father comes over and hugs me with his jaw set tight. He does that when he’s feeling emotional. I think about how this man rescued me to give me a great life and my heart fills.

I learned how to be a good man from his example. I learned that a father protects his child just like he did when he put himself between me and a rabid fox and took the bite instead of me getting hurt.

I learned from him that love isn’t always perfect but it’s steady. It’s a foundation that will never rock beneath your feet.

“I love you, son and I’m so proud of you,” he says.

My eyes fill and I nod at him.

Then my mother holds open the tent and the most beautiful woman in the galaxy steps into view. She’s wearing the wedding dress that she and my mother made. They talked about lace and pearls and necklines throughout the last few weeks but all I knew was that she was going to look like an angel.

And she does. Her face is lit up by a smile and her eyes are shining full of love.

Wearing a pink bow to match the pink flowers in the bouquet, Captain Claws trots down the path ahead of her. Since Courtney moved to the ranch, he decided that he’s her watch kitten and he wants to be everywhere she goes.

As she passed the chair where Amanda, my brother Leo’s wife, is seated, she hands her the flowers. Then she stoops to lift Captain in her arms and continues down the aisle to my side.

I want to tell her how beautiful she looks. I want to tell her I’m so in love with her, but I can’t speak. If I do, I’m probably going to start blubbering like a baby. Some nights waking up beside her, I’d pinch myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming, and she was really there in my bed.

Captain Claws climbs onto Courtney’s shoulder, and I take her hands in mine.

The officiant begins the ceremony, and I say all the right things at the right time but my mind is on the vision standing before me.

When he says it’s time to kiss the bride, I lean forward.

The kitten pops his leg out in front of Courtney’s face and meows ferociously at me.

My mother laughs and gets up to take him. He protests loudly as he’s carried away and I kiss the woman I’ve always wanted and loved. My best friend and now my wife.

Later that evening, Marshall toasts us and says something about new beginnings.

It’s not a new beginning at all. It’s another step in what was always meant to be.