Page 37 of My best friends little sister

I'm at the safehouse, moping around at the bar. I dont know how I got here. The last thing I remember is throwing my guts up in the bathroom and the next thing I know I'm here, drinking away all my problems.

I keep getting shady looks from my men. Nobody has ever seen me like this. I'm weak, pathetic, broken. I'm the head of the Italian mafia and yet here I am, drinking because of a girl.

But shes not just a girl to me.

I glare at them, reminding them I'm still their fucking boss. I could blow their fucking brains out right now and they need to get their in their thick skulls.

I finish my drink, downing the glass in one swift motion, when suddenly I'm ripped off the chair and thrown into the wall. Who the fuck thinks they can treat their boss like this?

Mateo

I dont stop him. I deserve every blow. Every kick, every punch, every hateful word, I deserve it all.

After a few more blows to the face Ivan pulls Mateo off me. I almost fall to the ground, losing my balance and stumbling harshly into the wall. ''I fucked up okay? I know. After what I did last night and what I said today, I wouldn't be surprised if angel wants me fucking dead''

I sigh, running my hand through my hair as I remember what I said to angelica. ''I said some...bullshit I didn't mean. I just needed her to believe it''

Mateo steps back and turns about to walk away but I stop him, grabbing his shoulder. ''Wait''

He doesnt turn around but he stops, letting me talk. ''I love her Mateo, I really fucking do. I'm trying to keep her safe and this is the only way I know how to do that'' I sigh, taking a deep shaky breath.

I cant be the reason for that. I wont be the reason. I wont let her get to that stage again.

Mateo's shoulders relax, like he understands my concern. ''You need to make sure she eats, make sure she sleeps. Dont let her lock herself away again. I know I broke her but you need to be there to take care of her and pick up the pieces because I cant be''

He doesnt respond, just nods slightly and walks away. Leaving me and Ivan behind. ''You really fucked up''

I wake up, feeling like I got kicked in the head by a kangaroo. Memories of yesterday quickly flooding back. ''Fuck''

I roll out of bed and make my way downstairs. Ivan's house is so different to mine. Slightly smaller and all of the rooms are in completely different spots to what I'm used to.

I head back upstairs and throw on my shirt from last night. I smell like whisky and vomit but I dont bother showering. I dont care enough to.

I make my way back downstairs to see Ivan standing impatiently by the door. ''Bout fucking time, lets go''

We arrive at my house. I take a deep breath before entering and slowly make my way inside.

I see Mateo sitting on the couch with jasper laying on his lap.

No angelica. I kind of hoped I would see her with Mateo.

Maybe watching movies and eating ice cream.

A healthier way to cope than to shut everyone out.

I walk over to the couch and sit on the arm rest. ''how is she?'' I ask, trying to show him I genuinely care.

When I look over I can feel my heart break even more.

I walk over to the counter to get a better look.

On it lays her birthday dress neatly folded, the dress I got her for our date folded on top of it.

Next to it is her new car keys, her diamond headband and the debit card I gave her.

I trace my finger along each item. She doesnt want them.

I got them for her. She wants nothing to do with me.

A box catches my eye. A purple sparkly box. The one I gave her gift in. I gently lift off the lid and look inside. The air being knocked out of my lungs. I hold back a sob as I view the contents.

Inside is what looks like trash to anyone else.

Random bits of garbage thrown in a box. But to me, these are memories.

The wrapping of the flowers I got her that day at the market.

The purple bow that was around jaspers neck.

Dried pressed flowers also from the bouquet I got her.

The fucking McDonalds burger wrapper from when we discussed kids.

When I told her I wanted to spend my life with her

She kept all these things, safe in a little box. A box of our memories. I pull out her necklace and bracelet from my pants pocket and gently place them in the box. Closing the lid and taking a deep breath.

I compose myself and turn back to Ivan and Mateo, who have been deep in conversation this whole time.

''You need to look after her. Please.

Not just making sure she eats and sleeps but also.

..dont let her hurt herself. Not because of me.

I couldn't live with myself'' he sighs, clearly defeated.