Page 50 of Mr. Hotshot CEO

“I’m sorry to tell you this,” I say, “but there’s a good chance you won’t get any great-grandchildren, unless Vince forgets to use protection when he’s high on drugs.”

My brother discreetly gives me the middle finger.

“I’m not counting on Vince,” she says, “butyou. You have nice girlfriend now, yes? Vince says she’s nice. Chinese girl with PhD. Sounds like good match.”

I sigh. “She’s not my girlfriend.”

“Just to be clear,” Mom says, “we don’t care if she’s Chinese. It’s not important, as long as you love her.”

“I care,” Po Po says. “Just a little.”

“You’re old-fashioned.”

“Am eighty-nine and could drop dead any minute! Am allowed to be old-fashioned.” Po Po turns to me. “If you have girlfriend who is not Chinese, it’s okay. Still happy for you. But I think it’s better this way. Where is she?” Po Po looks around.

“Unlike me,” I say, “Courtney isn’t taking two weeks off work. She’s at the lab.”

“Where does she work?” Mom asks.

“At U of T.”

“Will she quit when you marry?” Po Po asks. “Stay home to take care of babies?”

Dammit. Drinking beer and eating lemon squares alone on the patio was a much better way of spending the afternoon than facing an inquisition about the girlfriend I do not have.

“There won’t be any babies, not if Julian can’t seal the deal,” Vince says.

“Seal the deal?” Po Po frowns. “What does this mean?”

My family insisted I take time off so I wouldn’t burn out, but now they’re insisting on driving me up the wall.

“Stop it. All of you. For the last time, Courtney is not my girlfriend. Even if she were, I just met her on Friday, and it would be way too soon to start talking about marriage and babies, okay? Why can’t you all leave me alone to drink my old man beer in peace?”

There’s a moment of silence.

And then my phone beeps.

Vince swipes it off the table and reads the message. “Courtney wants to make sure you haven’t cracked and gone into work.”

“I’ve definitely cracked,” I mutter.

He scrolls through our message history. “Ooh, listen to this! She asked him to marry her.”

“She did not—I mean, that was a joke.”

Vince shrugs. “Details, details.”

I grab my phone back before any more damage can be done.

“I want to meet her,” Po Po says. “Not leaving until she gets here.”

Mom nods in agreement. “I’m very curious.”

“Hey, I’ve got nothing else to do,” Vince says, reaching for a cookie. “I’ll stay, too, even though I’ve already met her.”

Since I don’t see any way out of this, I text Courtney and ask if she can leave work early.

* * *