Page 44 of Mountains of Mist and Magic (A World of Sun and Shadow #4)

H e was solid, and real. Selenia felt his face, his hands, his jaw. Everything about him seemed real. And yet...it wasn't possible.

“How are you here?” Selenia asked him, her heart beating wildly in her chest.

“I don't know—I just am,” Jurel said, looking at her, his eyes wide with confusion. “I don't know what's happening. But—I'm so happy to see you.”

He leaned in for a kiss, but Selenia stopped him. “Jurel, I can't.”

“Please. Just one memory. Just one kiss. For me.”

Tears sprang to her eyes, and her entire body seemed to split with the weight of her emotions. This was Jurel, come back from—the spirit world? She had loved him at one point, wanted to start a family with him. But as she continued to look at him, the slight scruff on his face and the same clothes he'd been wearing when he died, she realized that she did still love him. It was in a different way than she loved Sion. It was like the way you miss daylight when it fades away to night, even though you love the night as well.

But she wasn't in love with him.

Before she could respond to his request, the scene around her changed, and she was suddenly inside the castle at the Twilight Kingdom. The noises were deafening, and she could hear the sounds of combat outside. Next to her, Julietta stood, but her figure was ghost-like, an echo of her friend. Renya was there too, and Kalora. Yet everything was misted, shrouded.

It was the site of Jurel's death. Just as before, one of the Shadow Realm soldiers aimed for her, and out of nowhere, Jurel began to move in front of her.

But the reenactment froze before her, and everything moved in reverse. The knife that was aimed at both her and Jurel moved back towards the soldier, and she watched as he drew his arm towards his side and walked the wrong way back through the hall. She followed him with her eyes, perplexed at the scene before her.

In a flash, he was moving forward again, his sword glinting in the light from the torches. Selenia looked to her left, eyes searching for Jurel, knowing at exactly what moment he would move in front of her, feeling the slight pressure as he pushed her aside.

It was a moment she re-lived many times. Each time it was still painful, but she realized she hadn't thought about this moment in a while.

But as she watched the figure cross in front of her to take the fatal stab, her eyes widened in horror as Sion's face came into view.

It was Sion who took the blow for her, Sion who was now on his back bleeding out in front of her. She sank to her knees, her panic anew. Renya tried to pull her away, and she heard her words, the same words that had echoed in her head for months.

The tears felt like hot acid against her cheek, and her heart ached as if she had taken the sword to her chest instead of Sion. What was this game? Was this real? Had the course of events somehow been twisted on her?

Before she could question more, Sion's body faded from her arms and everything around her was white again.

“What is happening?” she screamed, standing and moving her hands to her pants to wipe off Sion's blood. But when she looked down, her hands were devoid of blood. “What kind of twisted game is this?”

There was no answer, but the white room started to swirl again, and Selenia closed her eyes against the sensation. She felt a pull in her belly, and a deep sense of vertigo crashed through her system. A full minute passed, and then once she felt like things were done spinning and moving under her feet, she finally unclenched her eyelids and looked around.

There were now two giant mirrors before her, each surrounded by weathered stone. The mirrors looked more ancient than anything she'd ever seen in her life. She could see her reflection in each, but the closer she walked to them, she saw the telltale sign of the ripples in the surface, indicating that upon closer inspection she would most likely be viewing more than her own image.

She summoned her courage, and looked in the first mirror. At first, she merely saw her own reflection: her own cheeks, pale from the memory she had just been forced to view; her forehead, wrinkled in confusion; her messy hair, ringlets frizzy and wild in the humidity of the mountains. But then the scene shifted, and she was herself, but this time, an older version of her. The mirror-Selenia was standing in front of a little girl, who had red hair like hers and a dark complexion. They seemed to be at the Snow Lands, outside in one of the meadows. The little girl smiled a toothless grin, and then Selenia watched with great interest as the doppelg?nger version of herself lifted her hands, freezing blocks of ice in place and rearranging them with magic to form a giant igloo. The young girl smiled with unbridled joy and climbed inside the structure.

An older version of Sion, with head shaved clean and a beard embraced the woman in the reflection, and together they watched their little girl play in the snow.

Before Selenia knew it, the mirror was wiped clean, as if the scene never existed. Instead, all she saw was an image, a dark shadow-version of Sion's silhouette.

This must be some kind of test , Selenia thought, and she turned towards the other mirror.

She gasped slightly, watching as the mirror-version of herself cuddled with Jurel underneath a fur, before a roaring fire. They appeared to be in the lodge, and some kind of animal appeared by their feet. A wolf pup, perhaps? Jurel tilted the mirror Selenia's head up, and kissed her passionately, and somehow, standing before the mirror, Selenia felt it all the way through her body.

The vision faded as quickly as it appeared, and Selenia felt her heart constrict as Jurel disappeared. He had looked so happy, alive and well with her.

Selenia knew she was looking at two different views of the future. One future in which Jurel lived, and Sion perished. And then another future, one where she and Sion lived happily with a daughter.

The challenge before her became clear. This wasn't some trivia challenge, or some riddles that she would have to answer. She would have to make a decision that could affect the entire course of her future.

Sion or Jurel. Jurel or Sion.

A tear ran down her cheek, moist and cold.

She could save Jurel. A future that she dreamed of before that fateful night in the Twilight Kingdom. She remembered back at the anguish she felt, and suddenly, the anguish was no longer a memory. She felt his loss as vividly as she had before, the healing that time provided now gone.

Oh, what she would have done for this opportunity. The ability to bring Jurel back? Her first love? All those sleepless nights where she cried into her pillow, wishing some magic existed to undo what had been done. She remembered her visit to the Murcurial, begging to help her forget. So much that the Murcurial did something else...what was it?

Sion. Sion. Her mate. Her fated love. She thought of the vision that included him and their beautiful daughter. There were children in her future with Sion.

But Jurel's face flashed before her eyes, and she was brought back to the argument they'd had before his death, and the way she yelled at him and dismissed him. The guilt pooled in her stomach, and she felt herself moving towards the mirror that held his reflection. She could right a wrong. And if she chose to bring back Jurel, she would never seek out the Murcurial...and she would never be fated to Sion. She could erase the pain she caused, and free Sion from the half-bond they shared, one that he didn't fully understand.

She reached out to stroke Jurel's reflection, but she stopped just shy of touching the mirror.

No. This wasn't the right choice. While her conscience was begging her to save Jurel, to free herself from memories of her own wrongdoing, she thought back to the reflection with Sion.

She had a daughter.

She had magic.

The revelation forced her to pull her hand back instantly, as if the mirror was a roaring fireplace that might burn her.

This choice wasn't hers to make. She wasn't in charge of choosing a man. This wasn't some love triangle she was trying to resolve. Not a knot to untangle.

She was choosing something for all fae.

She was choosing a future with magic. While it was easy to get caught up in the visions of her future, she needed to look beyond it.

Needed to finally let the memory of Jurel go.

And with it, bring back magic.

Pulse hammering, she moved slowly towards the other mirror, the vision that included magic. Trembling, she reached out her hand, touching the surface of the mirror. The coldness of the glass felt jarring against her palm, and everything around her went dark.

She squinted, eyes adjusting to the dim light.

She was back in the thicket, back where she had started.

“What in the world...” she mumbled aloud, trying to make sense of what happened.

“Congratulations, Selenia Snowden,” a voice echoed. It was the same voice she had heard earlier before. “You have passed the test of wisdom.”

An opening out of the thicket appeared, and Selenia quickly crawled through it, heading towards the sunny tunnel before her.