Page 3 of Mister Daddy
“Thanks,” she says. “You girls, too!”
I drag Caitlyn and Jessica away from the bar before they can get themselves another drink. It’s still too early to be as drunk as my friends are, even if we are on vacation. At this rate, they’ll be down for the count by six, and I didn’t come on this trip to go to sleep while the sun is still high in the sky.
“I’m hungry. Let’s check out the buffet,” I suggest. Jessica pouts, but both girls follow me through the sliding glass doors into the cool deck buffet.
It seems like everyone on board had the same idea I did because most of the tables are full. We manage to snag a table with three chairs near the window and leave our bags on it to save our seats.
Caitlyn and Jessica go for salads, but I’m not about to miss the barbecue chicken I smell. I stand in line until it’s my turn and get two pieces fresh off the grill. I add some corn, slaw, and a couple slices of bread. It’s the kind of late spring meal I’d be having on my own at home if I weren’t here.
I sneak a bite of the chicken on my way back to the table and force down a groan. The food is amazing; it’s even better because I didn’t have to cook it myself. The 24/7 food service is part of what convinced me to come on this cruise in the first place.
On my way back to the table, I fill three quarters of a tall glass with lemonade and top it off with iced tea. If this is what it’s like every day, I might not want to leave when the cruise is over. But I won’t tell the girls that. They don’t need to know how much I’m loving this trip already.
My friends are already seated when I get back, but they’re not eating. Their eyes are glued out the window at where Florida’s coast is no longer visible. Only blue sky and the ocean waves lapping against the hull of the ship are to be seen.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” I say, startling both of them.
“Amazing. Just wait until we get further out. The water is even bluer, if you can imagine that,” Caitlyn rhapsodizes.
I can’t really picture it, but I take their word for it. This is their second cruise, after all. Besides, I want to eat before my grilled chicken gets cold, so I dig in. The girls take the hint and start on their salads, too. They sneak longing glances at my carb-filled plate while eating their rabbit food.
I get why they need to eat healthy. Maintaining stick thin figures like theirs isn’t easy. But I could never live eating like them. I’m of the firm belief that food should taste good. Otherwise, what’s the point in existing? Some girls eat to live, but I live to eat, and I’m sticking by my motto.
When we’re done with our late lunch, an announcement comes over the ship that all staterooms are ready.
“Finally!” Caitlyn says an eye roll. “I need to change out of these clothes.”
I’m not sure what’s wrong with the short jean shorts and tank top she has on, but I wouldn’t mind freshening up a bit myself. My body smells like travel even though we all live within thirty minutes of the port. It’s the standing in line and security checks and brushing up against sweaty people that makes me feel gross.
Plus, the one good thing about Caitlyn and Jessica’s constant cruise pestering is that they booked our trip far in advance. As a result, we ended up with a room that has a sliding door in addition to a porthole, which is a luxury on a big ship like this. You can’t take anything for granted when there’s very little space.
Once we get inside the room, the first thing we do is open the cabin’s sliding glass door to let the salty sweet air infiltrate what is to be our living space for the next week.
Of course, our room itself is miniscule. There are actually four beds, but they’re arranged like bunks. Plus the two top ones are Murphy beds that are attached to the wall. The mattresses fall out when you pull a strap, and the thin filling looks lumpy and uncomfortable. Between the two beds on the floor, there’s enough space for a book-sized side table, but no room to walk. Fortunately, there’s a tiny sofa in one corner, our only real amenity in this cabin.
Ship staff left our suitcases out in the hallway, so we drag them in and begin unpacking. We played rock-paper-scissors in the security line to decide who would sleep where. I lost, of course, so I have to settle for the bed closest to the door, but that’s okay. I don’t mind because honestly, the room is so small none of it really matters anyways.
“I need to wash first-day grime from my body,” Caitlyn announces. “Any takers for the bathroom, speak now or hold your peace for twenty minutes.”
“All yours, girly,” Jessica says.
“Go for it,” I chime.
Jessica and I unpack while Caitlyn showers. She finishes in record time, probably because she came fully waxed so she doesn’t have to shave. I wish I’d thought to do that, but waxing makes me nervous. It’s not the pain I’m worried about but the judgmental stares from the waxer as she works around my flabby thighs to get all the hard-to-reach spaces. I’ll stick with shaving in the privacy of my bathroom, thank you very much.
“You can go next if you want, Jess,” I offer.
“Thanks, babe. I’ll be quick.” My friend disappears into the rabbit hole they call a bathroom, whistling. But I know she’ll be fast because Jess is fully waxed, too. After all, my two friends went to the salon together and told me all about it when they were done in gruesome detail, which practically made tears come to my eyes. Pouring hot wax on your privates over and over again before ripping it off with no painkillers on hand? No, thank you. One more reason why I’ll stick with the privacy of my own bathroom and my own razor.
My clothes are all sorted and carefully placed in their new homes for the week, so I settle on the lumpy couch and flip on the TV.
“Be careful,” Caitlyn warns. “There’s a movie channel, and whatever you start watching, you have to finish.”
I furrow my brows at her. “Do they charge you if you turn it off or something?”
She laughs. “No, but you start watching and then you get hooked, no matter what the movie is. Jess and I ended up sitting for two hours to finish some animated kids’ movie last year because we watched the first five minutes and couldn’t pull ourselves away. Can you imagine? We paid so much money to come aboard, and we spent all this time watching a movie we could have caught on land.”
I want to say that won’t happen to me, but I’ve been known to get hooked on new episodes of sci-fi TV shows after just a couple of minutes. And I don’t evenlikesci-fi, which is the crazy part.