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W ednesday morning arrived too soon. Gabby wheeled her suitcase into the living room. Her appointment with Dr. Beecham was scheduled for eight o’clock. After the shower, she agreed to allow Marcus to attend the appointment. They stacked the baby toys and presents in their temporary living room the last few days. Matthew called Marcus to tell him about a meeting between a buyer and Mr. Wilkinson. If all went as planned, they’d soon get back to their real lives.

What did a normal life resemble for her? She never planned to stay with Marcus this long. They shared kisses, yet he always pulled away, making her feel dejected. Yet she insisted on the divorce. Trying to make sense of it all, she met with Dr. Hill. She left still feeling more confused than ever.

“Wolf and Abe will meet us at the hotel I booked near the courthouse. We can leave right after your appointment,” Marcus informed her as he set his go bag beside hers.

“Good,” she answered, glancing at him, wondering if he held as many regrets as she did.

“I’m glad you changed your mind about me attending. Do you think she’ll do an ultrasound, and what do they use to hear the heartbeat?” he asked her eagerly. “Do you mind if I ask questions? I made a list last night. I took notes as I read the baby book. Did you decide on an epidural or against it? I don’t blame you for getting one. Leo made me watch a video on child birth…er never mind.”

“A doppler. Sometimes, they do an ultrasound, and sometimes they don’t. Don’t get your hopes up,” she warned as she sat on the couch. “Why don’t we wait until we hear what she has to say. Can I see your list? I might know some of the answers to your questions.”

He pulled a piece of paper from his pocket and her eyes widened at the length of the list and thoroughness of his notes.

“Did you reconsider if you want to know about the baby?” He sat beside her and took her hand.

“No.”

“Can I ask why?” he prodded gently. “When I ask, you turn sad. I want you to feel happy about the baby.”

“I’m thrilled. Really.” She sighed. “At first, I didn’t want to know because I needed something to get through this on my own. I asked the doctor about the chances of the same thing happening to me as my mom. She died before even knowing my gender. My dad named me after her. The doctor assured me about the many medical advances since my birth. When I try to imagine myself holding the baby, I can’t tell if it’s a boy or a girl. I don’t see myself with the baby at all. Dr. Hill says once I get through the birth, I’ll feel better and it’s normal” She shrugged. “They say moms know things. I feel like I won’t get a chance to hold it. It sounds stupid, but it’s my reason to fight with all my might. I want to see my child.”

“Gabby,” he whispered, shocked at her revelation. “I promise you. This baby will be perfectly healthy and you’ll go through labor and delivery like a champ,” he reassured her.

“I don’t mean to scare you. My hormones seem to run wild and give me crazy thoughts. I’ll feel better once I know Wilkinson sits in a jail cell.”

“Wolf’s team will watch us once we arrive and Leo’s team plans to follow us. You don’t have anything to worry about. We’ll return home and wait for the raid. Do you still have the earrings in?”

“Yes.”

He tilted her chin upward to face him. “Nothing will happen to you. I promise.”

She smiled and nodded as her eyes dampened with tears. “See, it’s the hormones.”

Patch honked outside and Marcus kissed her before standing and taking their luggage outside. Her cell phone rang.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Gabrielle. It’s Tex. I heard you’re visiting Wolf and the team. Quick, what’s my number?”

She rattled it off the correct way and then backward.

Tex let out a laugh. “I see you spoke with Caroline and Alabama, good job. You’ll fit right in there at Serenity. Those women fit right in with Wolf’s team. They’re strong and smart as hell. Don’t worry about anything, Gabby. I’m watching over you this weekend.”

A foreboding took her over last night and try as she might, she couldn’t shake it. Tex’s reassurance comforted her. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He disconnected the call.

“Are you ready?” Knight asked as he waited by the door.

No. “Yeah.” She picked up her purse and followed him to Patch’s truck. Marcus helped her up and stretched the seatbelt across her stomach, settling it low under her belly.

They made the short drive to the hospital. Marcus helped her down. “I’ve researched vehicles for you and the baby. How about an SUV?”

“I need a job first. I’ll need to run the numbers and check on insurance, and licensing fees for Washington.”

“What happened to your car?” he asked as he helped her up the steps.

She glanced down guiltily. “I sold it. It took too much of my budget when I made the payments and paid the insurance.”

“Damn it, Gabrielle. I’m sorry.” He shook his head. “How did you get to work before you got the promotion?”

“Seattle’s got an excellent transit system. It ran only a block from my apartment,” she explained as they entered.

His jaw ticked and his expression turned hard. Gabby let go of his hand. “Please, Marcus, I don’t want to fight.”

He glanced down and forced himself to take her arm and smile. Inside his gut twisted into knots. He put her through hell. She sold her car because she could barely afford the apartment he sentenced her to. He saw the cupboards and fridge contents. Not to mention, she walked in an unsafe neighborhood.

“I’m not mad, baby. You only told me the truth and I deserve to hear how I hurt you.”

“I didn’t tell you to make you feel bad, I meant I ran the numbers…”

“Hey. It’s the first doctor’s appointment I’ve attended. I’m a bit nervous,” he lied. “Don’t read anything into it. For once, it’s my nerves getting to me.”

“You’re not the one getting on the scale,” she retorted, now a bit more relaxed.

“I promise not to peek. Besides, you’re beautiful pregnant or not. I read people say women glow while expecting. It’s not the right word. You’re radiant.”

She beamed at his compliment. “Thank you.”

They knocked on the office door. Dr. Beecham’s secretary ushered them inside. “The nurse will come for you shortly. Dr. Beecham wants to do an ultrasound today, due to your recent hospital stay. She said to assure you it’s only a precaution.”

Gabby glanced at him and smiled while he held her hand and widely grinned. “I guess you’ll see the baby after all.”

“I won’t lie. I hoped we might get a peek.”

“No. You don’t say?” she teased and laughed.

The nurse arrived and escorted them down the hall. “Mr. Hutchins, you can sit by Mrs. Hutchin’s head.” She turned to Gabby. “You know the drill, hop on the bed, and raise your shirt. Did you still want to keep the sex secret?”

Gabby hesitated.

“We don’t want to know. Please turn the monitor around while you examine everything. My wife and I want to keep it a surprise.”

The sonogram technician entered, and the nurse repeated his instructions. Then she turned to Gabby and Marcus. “When you’re finished, please return to the exam room.”

Gabby shyly lifted her top, giving Marcus his first full view of her expanded stomach. She shifted uneasily as she peered at him and her hand covered her tummy.

Marcus bent and kissed her forehead and leaned close to her ear. “You’re beautiful. Our baby rests inside you, and I find it the most incredible thing ever to witness. Don’t hide it. Be proud of it, as I am of you.”

The sonographer squirted the liquid on her and ran the wand across her growing belly. “I’m taking measurements and Dr. Beecham will review the results.” When she finished, she turned the monitor toward the couple. “Here’s your little bundle of joy.”

Knight watched in wonder as the baby moved. Gabby softly laughed. “The baby has your nose.”

“No. It’s too beautiful to get its looks from me,” he whispered. “Do you see this, Gabby? Our baby is perfect.”

Gabby smiled as a tear fell sideways down her cheek. The sonographer handed her a tissue as she dabbed her eyes, never taking them from the screen.

“How can I love something when I haven’t even met it?” he asked in awe.

“Because we created it in love,” Gabby answered sadly.

Marcus glanced around the room, realizing the sonographer left to give them privacy. After months of not knowing what tore them apart, he returned home and desperately made love to her, trying to feel the bond they shared. For a brief moment, he found it. He refused to allow Gabby to believe their precious gift resulted from a moment of raw need.

“It came from our love,” he said firmly, echoing her statement.

“Yeah,” she murmured.

He imagined she remembered the night of the baby’s conception, and he wanted her to never doubt how they created their little miracle. He vowed to prove how much he loved her.

They waited in the exam room for Dr. Beecham to show. Gabby sat on the exam table while Marcus sat in the chair against the wall. His foot tapped the floor, indicating his excitement as he held the ultrasound pictures.

Dr. Beecham entered and smiled at the couple.

“Hello, Gabby. Marcus. Baby appears fine. Your weight and vitals appear in the normal range. I’ll want to see you weekly until the baby’s birth. Do you plan on staying out of town long?” the doctor asked.

Gabby remained silent.

“No. We’ll only stay for a day and return. Does she have any restrictions since we’re driving?” he asked.

“You’ll need to stop and walk around frequently. I’ll ask the nurse to bring you a pair of compression stockings. Wear them while traveling. Drink plenty of fluids and I recommend if it’s a long trip, you break it up.”

Gabby groaned.

He squeezed her hand reassuringly.

When Dr. Beecham left them, he helped her down from the examination table.

His phone rang, and Patch’s name showed on the screen as they walked to the truck. He helped her inside before sliding into the driver’s seat.

“Hi, Patch.”

“Hey, Asshole. We’re ready to roll. Shadow will arrive by the time you get to the facility. We’ve packed the minivan and left room for Gabby to recline. It’ll be more comfortable for her.”

Marcus swallowed the lump in his throat when he heard how the team coordinated the drive for his wife’s comfort and planned to have his back. “Thanks.”

“How soon until you arrive?”

“Two minutes. Gabby will need to use the restroom,” he reminded Patch.

“Bryanna and Edie brought snacks and drinks for the trip. Kassie brought over pillows and blankets. We’ll leave as soon as Gabby’s ready.”

Marcus glanced at Gabby, who appeared as overwhelmed as he felt.

Gabby greeted Bryanna as they entered the facility and Marcus went over their route since Patch and Shadow planned to follow them, per Leo’s orders. Bryanna led them into the kitchen and handed her a to go cup of warm tea and a plate of toast.

“I assumed with the early doctor’s appointment, you might not have eaten. Here’s your premeal and we packed your breakfast in the cooler.”

“I can’t do this. I’m divorcing him. I can’t ride in a van with my soon to be ex for hours,” she rushed.

Bryanna stayed silent while Gabby breathed, trying to collect herself. “Breathe, Gabby,” Bryanna soothed. “Can I ask you something?”

“What?”

“I saw how you and Marcus acted toward one another at the shower. He kissed you and I didn’t see you resisting. My brother’s not perfect. Marcus seemed to take care of your needs and I felt the chemistry between you.”

Gabby licked her lips. “I’ll always care about him. He hurt me.”

“I know.” Bryanna paused. “You’re insisting on going through with this divorce despite caring for the man and carrying his child. Why does it seem as if you’re doing it to prove something to Marcus? I’m not saying you don’t have the right. It seems as if you’re conflicted about it and don’t want to consider any other options.”

“It’s not about me anymore. I must think about what’s best for my child. I don’t want this baby to feel like I did,” she admitted.

“What about Marcus? He says he’s trying to right the wrongs. I’m not condoning his behavior. But haven’t you noticed a difference in him?” Bryanna asked.

“He’s trying for the baby. He agreed not to make waves. If he saw me on the street and I never got pregnant do you think he’d be trying so hard to change things? He refused to even speak to me without his lawyer,” Gabby argued. “I can’t forget what happened between us.”

Bryanna sighed. “No. I imagine it hurts too much to forget. Have you considered forgiving? I’m not saying you should. I’m playing devil’s advocate. If you still have feelings, don’t you owe it to yourself and the child you share to at least postpone any major decisions until you understand how you feel?”

Gabby placed her face in her hands and closed her eyes. “You don’t understand. He ripped out my soul. I thought he loved me and he did all these things…I can’t stay with someone wondering if he misconstrues something else, I’ll get kicked out of the house and I don’t want to ever feel like this again.”

“I can’t tell you what to do. Regardless of your decision, I’m still your friend and won’t freeze you out. My brother made mistakes and I understand they hurt you. If you need to talk, I’m here,” Bryanna assured her.

“Thanks,” Gabby murmured as she rose from her chair and Bryanna gave her a gentle hug. She used the bathroom and carefully washed her hands, avoiding getting her cast wet. In one more week, she got rid of the annoying thing. When she opened the door, Marcus appeared. His face held a rigid expression but he avoided her eyes as he glanced away.

“We’re ready to leave,” he said quietly.

She followed him out of the facility, noticing he didn’t reach for her hand or place his hand at the small of her back. She sighed as she realized she’d never feel his touch again in three days.

Marcus walked into the building, intent on escorting Gabby to the van and getting her settled. As he approached he heard her speaking to Bryanna. He hesitated knocking as he heard the desperation in her tone.

“You don’t understand. He ripped out my soul. I thought he loved me and he did all these things…I can’t stay with someone wondering if he misconstrues something else, I’ll get kicked out of the house and I don’t want to ever feel like this again.”

He inhaled sharply as he realized she spoke about him. The joy seeing his child for the first time and Gabby allowing him to handle their current problem of transportation and her safety blew right out of him at her words. He did those things to her. Marcus hoped she noticed the differences between him from the past and the one standing before her now. He knew he still needed to work on himself and make amends for all the pain he put her through, but what did it matter if she refused to allow him in?

He stepped back to return to the waiting vehicles when she opened the door. He glanced away. “We’re ready to leave,” he barely choked out. She followed him toward the exit and let Patch settle her in as he got into the driver’s seat.

“All right, beautiful. Butthead will drive you. Shadow and I will follow you halfway. Then Wolf’s team will meet us at the first hotel and take you the rest of the way. We’re taking different vehicles and no one knows you’re leaving. There’s nothing to worry about,” Patch assured her. “We’re accompanying you as a precaution.”

Gabby glanced at Marcus, who stared straight ahead. His jaw ticked and he gripped the steering wheel. She turned back to Patch. “Thanks. I’m ready.”

Patch closed her door and patted the vehicle’s roof before sliding into a black truck behind them.

The air seemed to thicken as they drove off the mountain. She placed her purse in the back.

“I put your overnight bag in the backseat. I know your e-reader and other items you might want are in there. If you need to stop, please let me know.”

Gabby winced. His voice was cold and formal, not the relaxed one she experienced over the last few days.

“I filled your water bottle and the snacks are on the seat behind me.” Marcus informed her.

“I didn’t consider a minivan when I thought about what type of car I’ll want to purchase. These ride comfortably. It seems like it has plenty of room for baby items and such, too,” she said, trying to break the tension between them.

“It’s your decision. I’ll pay half,” he announced.

She gave a little snort. “We agreed to half the baby items, not my car payment.”

“My child will ride in whatever vehicle you decide upon. You’ll need it to take the baby to appointments and such. It’s only fair I split the cost. I’m sure Saint can help you pick one with all the safety features you might want.”

Gabby hesitated. “Marcus. Did I do something wrong?”

His mouth thinned as he kept his eyes on the road. “No.”

“Then why do I feel like you’re upset? Your jaw’s clenched and if you grip the steering wheel any harder, it’ll break in half,” she said as she watched him.

“I’m trying to get you to the courthouse on time. We don’t want to miss the divorce proceedings. Since I agreed not to let the court decide how we parent, why don’t you make your demands? Do I get a say or will I always be punished for screwing everything up between us? We both know you’ll never let me forget.”

Gabby straightened in the seat. “Do you want to discuss something now?”

“No.”

“What’s your problem?” she asked. “You seemed fine before I left to speak with Bryanna.”

“Nothing,” he said icily.

“Won’t you talk to me? You said we needed to communicate,” she asked.

“Yeah. I guess the rule only applies to one of us,” he snarked.

“What do you mean? I’m trying to talk to you now,” she exclaimed.

“Really? It seems you can talk to everyone but me. I’m well aware my mistakes caused severe damage to our relationship. Something you’ll never forget. I hoped to show you how I plan to support you, but I get the feeling nothing I do will ever make up for it,” he bit out.

She sighed and glanced out the window. “If Saint did this to Bryanna, what advice would you give her?”

“I’d beg her to leave him. Don’t worry. I’ll get you to the courthouse on time to sign the documents,” he replied.

Gabby rubbed her belly and stifled the sob. He overheard her venting to Bryanna. Didn’t he understand how conflicted she felt? Not to mention how awkward it seemed to be riding shotgun with the man you planned to divorce. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings,” she said softly.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you either,” he snapped.

“Pull the car over. Now,” she demanded. Gabby refused to ride for several hours in a van with an angry Marcus.

Marcus pulled to the side of the road. Gabby opened her door to get out.

“Stay here,” he ordered as he opened his door, stepped out and slammed it shut. She watched him in the rearview mirror as he stalked to the truck pulling in behind them. He gestured stiffly to the van and spoke adamantly with them. A minute later, Patch slid out of the passenger seat and jogged toward the van as Marcus took his place.

Patch got in and smiled. “Wow. It must be a world record somewhere. Not even a half hour and butthead got booted from the car. Don’t worry. I’m a much better driver and ride along partner. Shadow drew the short stick and he’ll bitch when we make it to the hotel.”

“It’s my fault,” she admitted sadly. “He overheard me speaking to Bryanna.”

“It doesn’t matter. You’re stuck with me. Why don’t you find us some road trip music?” Patch suggested.

“What kind of music do you like?” she asked.

“Anything. I prefer the oldies but can listen to anything except sappy love songs. Claire makes me listen to those and I want to pull my hair out.”

Gabby giggled as she located a station with a good mix.

They rode in a comfortable silence for an hour and she laid her seat back.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Patch asked. “I’m a good listener.”

Gabby shrugged. “I’m stuck. I remember when we loved each other and things seemed easy. If we disagreed, we talked it out. When things grew to their lowest, we fought until one of us left or went to our room. Now, it feels like we stay on guard all the time.”

“Did you and butthead ever discuss what he did for a living?” he asked.

“He told me he worked as a SEAL.”

“Do you know what that entails?” he asked.

She shook her head. “Marcus didn’t discuss anything. I met his team and we went to a couple of dinners with his teammates. The men rarely spoke with him and the wives kinda iced me out. After the last time, I didn’t bother attending.”

Patch nodded. “SEALs undergo intense training and exercises. Sometimes, we see humans at their worst. You may lose your best friends while protecting others, as in my case and Leo’s. Some things you’re trained to ignore. While other things haunt you until the day you die.”

Gabby turned to stare at him. “Did Marcus see something? He mentioned I angered him because I saw the good in everyone. When we first met, Marcus taught me self-defense and how to watch my surroundings. He mentioned seeing women abused.”

Patch grunted. “He spared you the details.”

“Why did you bring this up? Do you want to tell me something?” she asked.

“You’re a smart woman. Do you know about Doc and Kassie’s hospital? What do they do there?”

Gabby pondered his question. “They help veterans and teens.”

“Yep,” Patch agreed. “I’m one of them. I suffer from PTSD. I watched my unit die and as the corpsman, I didn’t have the equipment to save them. I lost my best friend. He died in my arms. When I returned I suffered from survivor’s guilt and blamed myself for losing my team.”

“How awful.” Gabby reached out and rubbed his arm. “I’m sorry.”

Patch didn’t acknowledge her. “Doc and the team, Claire and Kassie, they helped me. I still attend sessions when I feel overwhelmed and lash out. You haven’t seen how fast Claire can shove me out a door and tell me to go to a meeting at the hospital. She can be vicious.”

Gabby giggled imagining the petite blonde shoving the heavily muscled man out the door.

“You think I’m kidding? Claire holds a mean punch when I piss her off. Which I’ll admit happens pretty often,” Patch said as he glanced at her as if to see if his words hit home.

“She hits you?” Gabby asked, surprised.

“She punches me in the arm.” Patch nodded. “More than a mosquito bite and less than Taco. Don’t tell her I admitted it to you. She’ll start working out with Kassie and Victoria and the next time you see me, I’ll walk funny and won’t be able to have kids.”

“Victoria seems nice. She’s very protective of Kassie’s family. Almost a grandmotherly figure,” Gabby reflected.

Patch slapped his knee and guffawed. “Don’t tell Victoria she’s a grandmotherly type. She knows more ways to hurt a man than the government trains us.”

“No,” Gabby laughed as she denied it. Upon seeing Patch’s raised eyebrow, her eyes widened. “Really?”

“Don’t let her fool you. She’ll protect this family with her life and if you cross one of them, heaven help you.”

“Marcus must love her then. He’s loyal to a fault. Trust seems to act as his Achilles heel.”

“Why do you think that?” he asked.

“Because his worthless father let his family down. Marcus’ mom gave birth to Bryanna and the man came to the hospital, refused to hold his newborn daughter, and handed his son ten bucks when he dropped him off at the neighbor’s. He left them. Their mom worked nonstop. I don’t think Marcus or Bryanna ever got over it.”

“It must’ve been tough growing up without a father. I imagine Marcus probably goes to the opposite extreme to make up for his father’s failings,” Patch said as he checked his rear-view mirror.

“When we first met, I worked at a diner. When he didn’t spin up, he met me on nights I closed to walk me to my car. If he discovered I skipped a meal between my job and classes, I returned to my car to find a sandwich, chips and a drink in my seat. Last year, it upset him when I planted a tree in the front yard and shrubs near the house because he deemed it a security risk. He made sure I never wanted for nothing.”

“Hmmm,” Patch mulled over her statement. “Remind me again why I’m driving you to get a divorce?”

Gabby’s smile disappeared.

“Marcus admitted his mistakes to us. It makes me wonder how a man who seemed overprotective and concerned for your safety became irrational and angry.”

She shook her head. “I didn’t say irrational.”

“Does it seem normal to you that a husband flips out because of a few shrubs and a tree in his front yard?”

Gabby stared out the window. No. It didn’t seem normal. But what did it mean?

Marcus stared at the minivan ahead of them. He took the calming breaths as Claire taught him and stared out the window.

“Do you feel better now?” Shadow asked. “What happened up there?”

He frowned. “I overheard Gabby talking to Bryanna. She said she’ll never forget what I did. It made me realize I did this all for naught.”

“No. You did it to become a better man for your child and to seek the help you needed,” Shadow reminded him.

“I know. It seemed like we started making progress, and then I heard her say she can’t get past it.” He sighed. “It’s best we get divorced, focus on the baby and I’ll continue therapy with Claire.”

“Last I checked, divorce doesn’t mean never. Did you ever consider she might change her mind once she sees you stepping up?”

“No. Don’t get me wrong. I deserve this. When we went to the mediator, my brain set out on one mission, to destroy her. I didn’t even consider talking to her or giving her a chance to explain. I know the truth and I regret it. She has every reason to leave me.”

Shadow frowned. “You’re giving up? Did you talk to her about the changes you’ve made in your life to ensure you don’t do this again? Did you explain why you’re in therapy?”

“Why? It doesn’t change anything. I hurt her.” Marcus sat back and closed his eyes. Confusion plagued his mind. He recalled his last session with Claire after watching the babies all day.

“You did a great job today, Knight. Even when Grace continued to cry, you stayed patient. You’re a natural,” Claire complimented him. “Patch tells me we’ll soon be neighbors. I can’t tell you how relieved Patch feels. The neighbor watched him suspiciously after I screamed twice when he startled me. She never liked him.”

Knight grunted, “Go figure.”

Claire laughed. “Tell me about you and Gabby. How are things going?”

He shook his head. “I’m confused most of the time. We kiss. The day the bastard gave her the drug, she asked me to stay with her when she went to bed. One thing led to another. I stopped it. She believes I do everything for the baby.” He ran his hand across the back of his neck.

“Have you told her you love her?”

He shook his head again. “Gabby won’t believe me. I hurt her when I did love her. How can she forgive me?”

“Love has the capacity for many things. I can’t promise she’ll forgive you. If you consistently show up for her, she’ll feel more secure and possibly let down her guard. She’s expecting. Right now, her focus remains on the baby. Her body’s changing, she’s probably as confused as you are, and with the criminal investigation, she’s worried. I suggest you keep things light until after the baby arrives. Give her time to settle, help her, and when the time feels right, then approach her.”

“Patch told me you two didn’t get along before getting together. Trust me, I didn’t doubt him. I almost think you need a head shrink. How did you do it?” he asked.

“We did struggle. Ultimately, you find a way when you have a love worth fighting for.”

The love was still there. He felt it stir inside him whenever she walked into a room, laughed, or gazed into his eyes. They seemed to hold back what they wanted to say, afraid it might lead to another fight like countless times before. Then, sometimes, he wanted to blurt out, “I love you. Will you please forgive me?” Fear held him in check. What if she said no? Anything felt better than hearing her say she no longer loved him.

They stopped four times. He allowed one of the other men to escort her to the restroom each time. Patch frowned in his direction and Shadow mumbled under his breath. Gabby shot him a hurt expression but didn’t attempt to speak with him.

Shadow turned into the hotel and shut off the truck. “Wolf has fake ID’s for the next hotel. We used our names for this one. You and Gabby have a room with two beds. They only have one other room with a king-size on the floor we requested beside each other. You’ll have to suck it up.”

Marcus sighed. They must face each other at some point. The time apart gave him a moment to consider how to approach her and control his emotions.

When he got out, he walked toward the minivan and opened the door to help her. Dark circles appeared under her eyes and she seemed on the verge of tears.

“The hotel has a restaurant. I already called ahead and they have tacos. As soon as we settle into the room, I’ll call down and order them.”

Her eyes lit up as she murmured, “Thank you.”

Patch gave him an encouraging nod. “I’ll grab the bags. Why don’t you and Shadow escort Gabby to the room?”

The two men walked on each side of her. Shadow checked them in while they waited to the side.

“Do you need more breaks? You look exhausted,” he asked as he gazed down at her.

She shook her head. “I’m fine. I can’t wait to shower and put pajamas on. Do you think I can use my computer when we get settled?”

“Yeah. I’ll hook you up to our internet. Don’t use the hotel’s,” he said as Shadow approached with the keys.

“Once I drop you off, we’ll bring up the luggage. If you decide to leave, our room has connecting doors. Knock three times and we’ll come over,” Shadow instructed.

“Got it.” Marcus’ hand automatically went to her back as he led her from the lobby to the elevators. He felt the tension leave her at his touch and he reprimanded himself for adding strain to her already stressed nerves.

They walked down the hall, he swiped the key and entered while Shadow stayed with Gabby. Once he cleared the room, he let her inside.

Shadow nodded as he turned toward the elevator to help Patch.

“If you don’t mind me rummaging in your suitcase, I can pull out your PJ’s and you can start a shower. I’ll call down to room service for some food. It’ll be here as you finish,” he suggested.

She nodded and walked into the bathroom. A knock sounded and he peeked through the hole, before opening for Patch, who brought Gabby’s things inside. Shadow followed with Marcus’ bag.

“I’m ordering room service for Gabby. They have tacos.”

Patch gave him a slight punch in the arm, with a nod of approval. “We’ll watch.”

Shadow nodded as they went into the next room.

Marcus placed his bag on the bed closest to the door and opened Gabby’s bag to find his Seahawks jersey and leggings. He smiled as he gathered her items and tapped on the door.

“Come in,” she called.

“I’m placing your clothes on the counter. Do you want anything besides tacos?”

“Can you see if they have ice cream or a brownie? No. Maybe a hot fudge sundae. Or maybe a hot fudge sundae with a brownie,” she mulled over her cravings, making him chuckle.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

When she opened the door, allowing the hot steam to leave the small area, the smell of tacos filled the air, and she gravitated toward him or maybe the food.

“I don’t understand how I can be hungry. I ate almost all the snacks from the bag on top of the food at our stops,” she complained.

Marcus patted the bed, placed a pillow on her lap, and made a makeshift tray. He set the food in front of her and placed a carton of milk and a water bottle on the bedside table.

He sat on the bed and pulled out his phone.

“Didn’t you order anything to eat?” she asked.

“I ate while you showered. I’m texting Wolf to check in. Patch will sit with you while I speak with Leo and Shadow.”

“Please don’t use that as an excuse to leave me alone. I know you don’t want to stay in here with me. Patch explained the bed arrangements.”

He tilted her chin until she met his gaze. “I’m sorry about earlier. I’m not making up an excuse. Leo ordered me to check in once we settled. I want to show him I can follow orders.”

“Why? Did you accept a position with the team?” she asked.

Marcus hesitated. “I’m doing my best. I hope to stay in Serenity and they’re giving me a trial run,” he admitted.

Marcus took Gabby’s empty plate, shaking his head at how fast she inhaled the food. He went to the mini fridge and pulled out a fudge brownie with a dish of ice cream and a side of hot fudge. Gabby beamed in delight.

He went to the connecting door and knocked three times. Patch opened their side and he walked in. “I won’t take long,” he said as he went into the other room.

Gabby watched as he left and turned her attention to the treat. “I don’t think I’ve craved anything sweet other than ice cream. I hope this isn’t too much sugar. Do you think it’ll be all right?”

Patch smiled. “Go for it. I stayed with Samantha and Bryanna while the guys handled some business. They demolished a box of donuts and a whole chicken at the same time. This seems tame compared to them.”

Gabby smiled as she pulled her computer over to her side. “Can you hook me up to whatever internet Marcus wanted me to use?”

Patch took her computer, clicked a few keys and slid it toward her. “You’re all set. Do you mind if I call Claire?”

“No. I’m surfing the internet and stuffing my face.” She picked up the spoon and dipped it into the ice cream and brownie.

Patch smiled as he stood and checked the door with his phone to his ear. Gabby glanced at him and pulled the computer over to her. She typed in PTSD symptoms. She clicked on the link and began reading as she shoveled the gooey goodness into her mouth. She barely noticed as Patch approached and sat beside her while he spoke with Claire. He raised an eyebrow asking permission to borrow the computer.

Gabby nodded and slid it closer to him while she finished off the remaining ice cream.

He typed in several tabs, turned the computer toward her, and walked away. Gabby leaned in and noticed he had sent her to better sites, which also included veterans talking about their experiences. Afraid Marcus might walk in, she saved each tab and closed all but one. Her eyes eagerly scanned the information, and her heart leapt as she recognized some of the things mentioned. The veterans discussed events that had happened to them exactly the way Marcus behaved even before they broke up. He checked the doors and windows even though the cabin contained a security system. He didn’t seem to sleep at night. Sometimes she heard him moving around when the baby woke her up to pee.

Marcus knocked on the door before opening it. Gabby shut the computer page down and turned it to a baby store sight while the men spoke.

Patch winked at her as he left the room.

“Thank you for the food. The brownie hit the spot,” she said as she rose from the bed to go to the bathroom.

When she returned Marcus paced the room and turned on the television. Something he rarely did.

“I hung the plastic sleeve for my cast inside the shower to dry. Will you take it out if you plan to shower?”

“Yeah. I’ll take one in the morning. You might want to get some sleep. We’re leaving early. I asked them to add a few more rest breaks for you and I want to ensure we make it to the hotel before dinner,” he informed her.

“Why do we need to be there by then?”

“I figured it would help you relax if you visited with your friends. I requested Wolf bring a few extra teammates along to secure your room,” he said as he flipped through the channels appearing uninterested in what he watched.

“Won’t you stay with me?” she asked hesitantly.

“Considering we’re leaving for the courthouse first thing in the morning, I thought it best to get a separate room. Wolf and his team will escort us halfway back and Leo said two men will accompany you to the cabin.”

“Marcus, what about you?”

“I’m returning to my condo in Seattle. It’s a rental and I’m not on the lease. Once you’re settled, I’ll pick up my things.”

Gabby felt the unease flow through her body. His tone didn’t sound angry or mad. It seemed like acceptance. Instead of making her feel better, her mind flashed back to the veterans’ conversations.

“Can we talk?” she asked.

Marcus hung his head. “Gabby. You need to rest. I’ll watch over you. Shadow will drive tomorrow and I’ll sleep then.”

“You don’t plan on riding with me tomorrow?” she asked surprised.

“Damn it. What the hell do you want from me?” he seethed. “I’m getting whip lash from trying to meet your needs. First you don’t want me near you and then you do. One minute you want me to comfort you with sex and then you say you don’t trust me.”

His words came out raw and full of pain. Gabby slowly sat on the edge of the bed facing him.

“I apologize. My emotions seem erratic. I never thought you and I…it’s difficult for me, too,” she said softy.

He rolled his eyes to the ceiling. “It doesn’t seem like it. You made me promise not to stop the divorce, not to fight you on custody, and I feel like a lamb being brought to slaughter,” his voice cracked. “When we return, I want someone to call me when you’re in labor. I fully understand my actions warranted all of this. I still want my child to know I was present at his or her birth.”

“I have a few weeks left. Don’t you plan to see me?” she asked.

Marcus turned to face her. Tears ran down his cheeks. “I’m truly sorry for all the pain I caused you. If I knew of some way to take it all back, I’d do it. I never should’ve jumped to conclusions. But I left you way before I kicked you out of your home. I hope you find happiness again one day, Gabby.”

“Marcus?” she whispered his name as she drew closer. “What’s wrong?”

“I failed you and the baby. I remember saying those hateful words about how I felt thankful we didn’t have kids. In truth, I’m more excited about this child than anything in my life. Please don’t tell Tiger I never wanted him or her. I said it to hurt you.”

“I’ll never tell our child.” She shook her head. “You didn’t mean it,” she soothed.

“Yes. I. Did.” He pounded his fists against his head, taking her aback. “I’m fucked up. I can’t seem to do anything right. My life keeps spinning out of control and I’m helpless as I watch the things I love most slide through my fingers. I’m sorry, Gabby. I’ll swear on my life I wasn’t thinking straight when I hurled all those ugly, hateful words at you,” he confessed.

“Marcus—”

“Then you walked into the attorney’s office, dressed to the nines, your hair down exactly like I love it and smelled like vanilla. I wanted to hold you in my arms and beg for your forgiveness. You didn’t seem to care as you scrolled on your phone. I’m not blaming you. In my haze of anger, I vowed to hurt you more when you asked how soon our petition could be filed. You didn’t do anything but love me and I destroyed you.”

She witnessed the pain in his eyes as he appeared like a broken man. Alarm bells went off as he seemed more desolate by the minute.

“Marcus,” her voice turned stern. She took his hand and placed it on her belly. “You did something right. The proof moves inside me. Feel our child.”

Marcus leaned down and kissed her stomach. “I didn’t want to become like him. We kept spinning up and I felt the distance grow between us. I started forgetting things. You didn’t seem happy. You reminded me of Mama before my dad left. You didn’t run and kiss me when we argued. You walked away. I tried harder to hang on to you and made the list to ensure when I left you didn’t need anything. Instead it made things worse.”

Marcus gripped his hair. His eyes squeezed shut and he rocked back and forth. “You didn’t do anything but love me. I signed up for a mission to save us but I killed us instead.”

Gabby’s heart pounded as she heard the distress. She got up and knocked on the door. Something told her Marcus needed more than her.

The door opened and Shadow swore under his breath. “Patch.”

A second later, Patch knelt beside Marcus and spoke quietly. He glanced at Shadow and jerked his head, indicating that he should take Gabby into their room. He took her by the arm as she stared at Marcus and led her away.

“I want to stay. What’s wrong with him? I know he’s upset about the divorce but he seems different.”

Shadow sat her on the edge of the bed. “Right now, your presence won’t help. Marcus seems to be experiencing an episode. Patch can handle him. He works with veterans at the hospital. Do you know if Marcus took his meds?”

“What meds?” she exclaimed.

“Shit,” Shadow muttered. “It’s not for me to say. Please wait until Patch has Marcus in hand. He may need help. You can take our bed tonight.”

“Who the hell can sleep? My husband’s in pain.”

“Shadow,” Patch called. “Get Claire on the phone. Damn it, Marcus. She’s going to have questions. Why don’t you tell her what’s going on?”

Gabby listened intently as Shadow handed his phone to Patch. “I’m with Marcus. Yeah. Hold on.”

Gabby listened as the room turned silent except for Marcus moaning as if in physical pain. Shadow entered the room again.

“He’s all right, Gabby. Claire’s talking to him. Patch has his meds,” he assured her.

Even with his assurance, Gabby knew her husband wasn’t all right. Something seemed incredibly wrong.

She sat on the bed and pulled the pillow to her chest. Did she do something to set him off? Did their fight earlier cause this?” Worry filled her chest.

“Gabby. He’ll feel fine in the morning. I’m sleeping in the room with him and Shadow will sleep on the floor,” Patch explained.

“No. I’ll stay with him,” she insisted.

Patch shook his head. “No. You’re pregnant and we’re not risking you. Don’t blame yourself. He lost his shit for a minute. Claire’s talking him through it.”

Gabby slid off the bed. “I want to see him.”

Patch gently grabbed her arm. “No, Gabby. Marcus doesn’t want you to see him like this. I know you’re thinking the worst in your head. Trust me, we have him in hand.”

Gabby searched Patch’s face seeking the truth. He never wavered. “I promise you. Get some rest. I won’t leave his side.”

Gabby pulled back the blankets and slid under the covers. She adjusted the pillows as she turned on her side. Shadow returned a minute later and threw a blanket and pillow to the floor. She listened as Patch said something to Marcus. Their voices muted as if aware she clung to every word.

“Sleep, Sweetie. Patch knows what he’s doing,” Shadow whispered.

Gabby nodded even though she knew he didn’t see her.

She strained to catch even a blurb of the conversation. After a while, her eyes grew droopy as the silence grew longer between snatches of conversation. She struggled against the heaviness of her eyelids, but sleep managed to pull her under.

The next morning, Marcus appeared by her side. “Gabby. It’s time to leave. May I help you dress?”

Her eyes shot open and she examined him from head to toe. Her hand shot out and caressed his cheek and he captured it with his own.

“I apologize for last night. I’m afraid I haven’t slept lately and I didn’t…” He paused and swiped his hand across his face. “I didn’t take my medication and everything caught up to me. Patch and Claire helped me. I assure you, I feel a ton better. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“You didn’t scare me. I worried about you,” she admitted.

Marcus smiled. “Thanks. May I help you?”

Gabby rose from the bed. “I’ll only take a few minutes. Can you pack my sleeve in my bag?”

“I already did. I ordered you tea and toast. If you can eat it while you dress, I have pancakes and bacon waiting for you,” he coaxed as he followed her inside the room.

His bag lay on the bed. Shadow and Patch seemed to have disappeared.

“Don’t worry, they took the bags down except for yours. I wanted you to sleep as long as possible,” he informed her.

She nodded as she went into the bathroom to dress. She ate her toast at the sink and drank the lukewarm tea. When she brushed her teeth, she opened the door and took her toiletry bag to her bigger one.

Patch returned. He and Marcus escorted her to the minivan. She got in and Patch slid into the driver’s seat.

“Doesn’t Marcus want to see me today? I want to talk about last night.”

Patch glanced at her. “Give him some time to decompress. He’s staying with you tonight and I’ve already spoken with Wolf.”

“Does Marcus know you told him what happened? Why do they get to know and I don’t?” she asked angrily.

Patch sighed. “I know better than to say calm down, Gabby. I’m partial to my balls. It’s not my place to tell you. I’ve done enough already. Marcus will tell you when he’s ready.”

Gabby crossed her arms, unhappy with the situation. Determined to figure it out, she pulled out her computer and read the pamphlets she downloaded. If they refused to tell her, she’d find out for herself.

When they made their first rest stop, Marcus jogged to the van. “I’ll take you to the restroom. Did you remember to put on your compression stockings?”

She shook her head. “I don’t understand you. You insisted on taking care of me, but it’s not an option for me to help you?”

“Can we discuss it at the hotel?” he asked as he led her to the restrooms.

“Will you at least ride with me?” Her eyes pooled with unshed tears. “I promise not to bring it up. You worried me last night and I’ll feel better if I can see you myself,” she argued.

“Don’t do this because you blame yourself. It’s entirely on me,” he demanded.

She shook her head. “I won’t.”

Marcus nodded. “Go take care of Tiger. I’ll stay right here.” Shadow stood by a family restroom and opened the door as they approached.

She went inside, happy he agreed to ride with her. Hopefully, she’ll understand when he explained at the hotel. The hours promised to dwindle slowly until they arrived at the hotel. Gabby knew she missed an important piece of the puzzle and how it involved her.

Patch approached the two waiting men. Marcus swiped the scruff along his jaw.

“What’s the matter?” Patch asked.

“She wants me to ride with her. I feel I’m in control but I don’t think I can handle answering questions yet. I know you want me to tell her what I’m doing. I don’t want her back because of guilt or pity. I did everything she claims. She has a right to find happiness and not deal with my bullshit,” he stressed.

“Why don’t you take care of your needs, and I’ll explain to Gabby why it’s best to keep things status quo?” Patch responded.

Marcus struggled with himself before finally nodding and walking away. He didn’t want her to feel he abandoned her, but he barely contained his emotions, which bubbled at the surface. He needed the time. The closer they neared their destination, the more anxiety reared its ugly head. Vowing to see this through for Gabby and his child, he didn’t want her to see him like last night.

Gabby exited the bathroom and searched for Marcus. Patch smiled and nodded toward their vehicles.

“He’s not riding with me, is he?” she asked.

“Come on. We’ll talk once we get on the road,” Patch coaxed as he led her to the minivan. He helped her inside and slid into the driver’s seat. He pulled out when Shadow gave him the go ahead.

“Why doesn’t he want to ride with me? I promised not to discuss last night,” Gabby demanded.

Patch glanced at her. “You know your husband. From what you told me before he went on his last assignment, he ensured your comfort and safety. It’s hard for a man like him to have his spouse see him at his weakest. It’s not anything you’ve done. It’s more about how you’ll see him. Give him some space to settle his feelings.”

She shook her head. “I don’t understand. We set this date months ago. He insisted on the earliest one. Now he loses his mind and no one will tell me what’s happening.”

“What did you read earlier?” Patch asked. “Does anything stick out?”

“Thinking back, I now understand his actions regarding the landscaping and how he seemed distracted all the time. The outbursts when I tried to speak with him and his lack of sleep. He blamed it on work. If he showed symptoms, why didn’t the military see this?”

Patch sighed. “Marcus’ job required him to work alone. He saw people when necessary. When you went to the accounting office after discovering everything about your boss, did you show him how you felt about his disregard for human life?”

“No. I didn’t want him to know until we succeeded in getting what we needed to put him away,” she explained.

“Hmmm. Imagine how spinning up constantly, struggling with marital issues and unable to communicate with his partner about his job took a toll on a man who always seemed in control.”

“It doesn’t explain missed birthdays or treating me like he did,” Gabby stated angrily.

“I’m not condoning his behavior. Step into Marcus’ shoes for a moment. Think about this past year and a half. When did you notice the changes? Then ask yourself, after spinning up, if you return home and found a stranger in your bedroom and your wife in bed, what’s your reaction?”

“I didn’t consider his point of view. When I discovered my pregnancy, our welfare took precedence. It’s my job to protect my child.”

“From what?” he asked as he glanced in his mirror.

Gabby swallowed. “I don’t want him to hurt our child,” she admitted.

“Has he physically hurt you?” Patch arched an eyebrow in her direction and his voice deepened.

“Oh, no.” Gabby shook her head. “Even when we fought, he left or locked himself in his office. I don’t want him to abandon this baby.”

Patch nodded. “I guess you have a lot to think about. Marcus told us he questioned the paternity when he saw you at the hospital. Did he abandon you then?”

Gabby hung her head. “No. He seemed angry. Yet he still insisted on taking care of me. Even when he took me home, he asked if I brought him to my lover’s apartment. I closed the door in his face. A few minutes later he barged in and still brought me to Serenity and bought me tacos.”

Patch turned the music up. “Why don’t you mull over your thoughts? This must be your decision, Gabby. What do you want to do?”

She stared at the road ahead. She felt positive about the divorce before she read the pamphlets and witnessed Marcus’ meltdown. Then why did it feel like this new information changed how she felt about his actions?

Shadow sighed. “Why don’t you tell her about what you went through? You don’t need details. It might help her to understand. Mental health issues don’t make you weak. You protected our country, man.”

“I don’t want her to reconsider based on my needs. We have a child to consider. Her happiness comes first. I need to work on myself.”

“You’re an asshole. I may be recently married, but even I know communicating your needs to your partner tops the list of marriage 101.”

Marcus rubbed his eyes. He vowed to let her go. If he changed his mind now, would she consider it another broken promise? It seemed as if he screwed up daily. He didn’t want to hurt her any more than he already had. It felt selfish to tell her the truth now.

When they arrived at the hotel. He helped her out of the van.

“Shadow checked us in. We’ll get you settled quickly and you can take a nap.”

She nodded, the exhaustion and stress showing in her expression.

When they entered the room, he turned down the bed and knelt to remove her shoes. Kicking himself for forgetting to bring her pillow along, he devised a pillow support system for her. Her hand rested under her cheek as he pulled the cover over her.

Setting the alarm, giving them time to dress, before Wolf arrived, he lay beside her. She snuggled into him.

“How long do you think it’ll take tomorrow?” she asked quietly.

“The attorney said we’re on the morning docket at nine,” he replied. “I requested we go early under the circumstances. Kassie’s godfather’s attorney called the courthouse and spoke with someone. I imagine we’ll be one of the first.”

She nodded.

Marcus rubbed her back, noticing the tense muscles and pondered whether she doubted this divorce. Unsure if he should ask, he kept quiet. Too much passed between them.

Before he knew it, his alarm went off. He hadn’t slept, worried about the next day. He woke Gabby and helped her dress. Shadow and Patch hugged Gabby and said goodbye. Wolf’s team planned to escort them the rest of the way.

Wolf and Abe smiled as Marcus helped his wife down the stairs.

“Gabrielle, you’re glowing. Caroline wanted me to tell you she wanted to come. She got stuck working on a project.” Wolf hugged her gently and shook Knight’s hand.

Abe squeezed her. “Alabama wanted to come. One of the kids came home sick. She sends her love, and they plan to fly to Seattle for a girls’ weekend.”

“Tell them to let me know when. I miss them,” Gabby said as Wolf led them to a dark vehicle.

“The team checked out the hotel. Dude has the entrances and exits covered. Cookie already reserved your room in the computer system under an assumed name.”

Abe passed him a photo ID and a credit card. “Courtesy of Tex. There’s one for Gabby, if needed.”

“I’ll call him and thank him this evening.” Knight put the items in his wallet.

Both men laughed at his statement. They pulled up to the hotel.

“We have eyes on you all night. Try not to leave the rooms. They have a connecting door. Gabby, it’s important to leave it unlocked so Knight can get to you if there’s an emergency. We don’t want the hotel staff coming in and out of the room. We took the liberty to order dinner for you. Abe will bring it up. He’ll knock six times and leave it at the door,” Wolf instructed as Abe exited the vehicle, covering her until Knight flanked her opposite side.

Gabby showered and pulled her hair back into a professional bun. Knowing how Marcus loved playing with it, she opted to pull it up. She didn’t think she could bear his tender touch after tomorrow.

Marcus knocked on her door before entering. “Abe brought us dinner. I wanted you to eat while it’s hot.”

Gabby followed him to his room, where he set the table and placed the food in the middle.

“Pick out what you want and I’ll take whatever. They ordered a selection, not knowing what you might feel up to eating.”

Gabby went through the items and found a piece of grilled chicken and broccoli. She sat down and cut it into pieces.

“Do you want milk? I forgot to ask them to pick up some,” he explained.

She shook her head. “No. I’ll drink it with breakfast in the morning. Water’s fine.” She waited for him to talk to her. The longer she sat there, the more furious she grew.

He passed her a bottle and took one for himself. Gabby picked at her food. They silently ate while listening to hotel room doors slam as people walked down the hall. Knight seemed to watch her like a hawk, making her nervous. When she couldn’t stand it anymore, she stood.

“I’m tired. I’m going to bed.” She walked to her room and when she placed her hand on the knob, Marcus’ hand covered hers.

“Tell me you want this and I’ll go through with it without a fight. If you feel anything for me, Gabrielle, I need to know. I’m aware I’ve made mistakes.”

“You agreed,” she whispered. “You can’t even talk to me now. We’re still fighting like before.”

His hand slid from hers and he stepped away. “You’re right. I promised. If it’s what you want, I’ll keep my word.”

She turned the knob and entered her room. She walked into the bathroom, grabbed tissues and returned to climb on her bed. The light from the bathroom gave off enough glow to make her feel comfortable as she cried.

What if she took him back? How many times did she watch women return to their husbands after they cheated or because they didn’t want to be alone? Anger and rage filled her as she recalled how hard she fought for them and he came and went like a zombie. He treated her like one more mechanical part he must fix before he left.

Knight paced his room, unsure what to do. She still wanted the divorce. When he heard her soft cries, he didn’t bother knocking. “Gabby. I’m sorry. I didn’t want to upset?—”

A pillow flew past his head. He ducked. A banana hit him in the chest. His hand automatically rubbed where the projectile hit him. An apple bounced off his forehead, surprising him.

“Get out!” she wailed as her pitcher’s arm threw another missile at him.

“What the hell? You’ve not said two words to me all evening and now you decide to decapitate me?”

“You’re a…a…an asshole!” She hissed.

“I know.” He slowly approached her.

“Do you know how much it hurt to stand on the graduation stage when you never showed up? Or how I felt when I waited all day for you to come home when the team returned on my birthday? You didn’t even wish me a happy birthday.” Tears fell down her cheeks. “How can you go by Knight when you didn’t try to save our marriage? You’re deliberately trying to confuse me. You’re acting nice. I planted the tree in the front yard because it bloomed pretty, pink blossoms. It complemented the house’s color. Then you yelled at me.”

“I did,” he agreed softly as he wiped the tears from her face.

“You started arguments for no reason. You left me alone even when you returned.”

“Yes,” he whispered, taking responsibility for everything he put her through.

“You accused me of cheating on you.” she cried. “How can you stand there and say you believed me capable of doing such a thing when I showed you nothing but love?”

“I can’t.” Knight didn’t deny it. He needed to hear how he hurt her.

“You kicked me out of the house I made into our home.” She pushed his chest. He didn’t stop her.

“You humiliated me when Scott brought me home from the hospital. I thought I lost our child,” she sobbed.

“I’m sorry I did that to you.” Tears ran down his cheek as he watched her hurt-filled expression. “You have every right to feel angry. Can we sit on the bed? The baby, Gabby,” he gently reminded her as he backed her up to the edge of the mattress.

“Why? Why did you do it, Marcus? You refused to talk to me. Not even in our worst fights did we leave things as you did. I don’t understand.” She peered at him with confusion in her eyes.

“I didn’t comprehend what happened to me then. If you want to talk, will you please lie down? I’ll answer any questions I can. We don’t want your blood pressure skyrocketing and Dr. Beecham isn’t here,” he pleaded softly.

She let him lift her legs and press her against the pillows until he deemed her comfortable.

He lay down beside her. “I can’t discuss my missions with you. The last year I stayed with the team, I grew restless. The team and I didn’t get along and some of the missions…they stuck in my head. It felt like we barely touched down before we spun up again. When we returned home, you were gone more often than not. The list on the fridge reminded me of what I needed to complete before we spun up again. My ability to care for you and the missions, sort of mixed together.”

He caressed her cheek to calm her down. “You know what happened with my dad? I never wanted you to think I’d leave you to handle everything like my dad did with us. I started the list to remind me you couldn’t handle everything alone. You still needed me even when I didn’t feel worthy. Then I forgot to do things and the list became my reminder of how I failed you. When I returned and you happily crossed off items from the fridge, I felt angry…because you didn’t need me.”

“I wanted you. The house became a project of love. I hoped one day, you’d return and see how much I turned it into a home for you. You seemed angry all the time. I didn’t want to fight when I knew you might spin up in a moment’s notice.”

“None of this was your fault. My commander suggested I work a black op when I went in for my review. I accepted the position in exchange for an early contract termination. I thought it’d only take a couple of months. It took quite a bit longer and I witnessed things and it got jumbled inside my head. I worried about your safety. Hence, the fight about the tree. It blocked the view of the street.”

Gabby’s hand held his and pulled it to her chest.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Pride, guilt, and I screwed up. When I returned and kicked you out, I completed my mission and planned on coming home to tell you about my contract ending. Instead, I terminated my marriage.”

“Why did you refuse to see me? I told you I needed to speak to you about something important.”

“If I saw you, I knew I’d beg you to take me back.” His thumb moved over hers. “Then I turned all the hurt into rage and hate to make it through the day. When we met at the lawyer’s office, you smelled incredible and appeared so damn beautiful it nearly brought me to my knees, yet I refused to give in.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? You didn’t even ask what I thought about you taking on a more dangerous job. I knew I married a military man and accepted what it entailed. You’re a SEAL. It’s dangerous enough. Didn’t you think about how I might’ve felt if you died?”

He shook his head. “No. Because my only mission focused on coming home to you.”

Gabby sobbed. “At what price, Marcus? You shattered me. I worked my ass off to make you proud of me and paid off the house and truck early using my education. Then you left me with nothing.”

“I stayed away, believing I got revenge on you for sleeping with another man. I’m here to tell you that it’s you who won. My heart stopped beating until I saw you at the hospital. I’ve acted like a damn fool and hurt you. The last couple of months have opened my eyes. Living in Serenity has brought my soul some peace. I won’t fight you, baby. You deserve a better man. If this divorce brings you happiness, then I’ll let you go,” his voice faltered.

“Marcus, we can’t go back. You said so yourself. I don’t know if I can forget or forgive all this. There’s too much…and now we have a child coming.”

He swallowed, “I understand.” He kissed her hand. “Will you let me make love to you? I don’t want my last memory to be of the night of your graduation. I want to let go of us, with you knowing I never stopped loving you. I’ll spend my life missing the old me before I lost you,” he whispered.

Gabby leaned in and kissed his lips. Her tears mingled with his as they said goodbye. Knight slowly sat up, gently pulling her with him. She lifted her arms, while he slid her top over her head. He pulled the pins from her hair and used his fingers to let it fall around her shoulders. He bent and kissed her collarbone as he unhooked her bra, sliding it down her arms.

Gabby’s fingers slid under his shirt, lifting it until he grabbed the edges, yanking it off. His hand wrapped around her neck while his tongue delved into her mouth, seeking hers.

She shivered as he pressed her against the pillows, sliding the maternity pants and panties down her legs. He crawled up the bed to her belly. He caressed it as if memorizing the miracle they created.

“When you remember the night we created Tiger, don’t dwell on the doubts plaguing you about me. I loved you then and I love you even more now. When you someday tell this child how we created him or her, don’t hesitate to tell them we did it with love,” he whispered as he reverently kissed the growing bump.

“I won’t,” she assured him with tear filled eyes. “Promise me you’ll spend time with our child. Don’t let your demons ruin this relationship. This baby deserves a good father.” Gabby ran her hand through his hair.

“I’m not letting Tiger or you down ever again. No matter how we decide things from here on out, I’ll support you.” Knight moved to her swollen breasts, his finger traced along the enlarged areola, watching the tiny bumps rise to the surface and her nipples pebble.

Leaning down, he swiped his tongue over one as he tugged on the other. Gabby’s chest rose and he heard her breath hitch. “Are they too sensitive? I read they become tender.”

“No.” She moaned. “It feels good. I’ve missed you. My body remembers and aches for your touch,” Gabby confided.

He raised his face to kiss her lips and traced the outline of her form from her collarbone, over her breast, along her bump to her mound. Knight separated her silky folds with his fingers, discovering her damp. “You’re wet. I forgot how you tasted on my lips and tongue.”

Marcus pressed in deeper, as Gabby’s hips rose upward, begging for more. “I’m greedy and if this is the last time to experience heaven, I want you soaked.”

She whimpered as he removed his hand and slowly slid back in, curling upward until he found the spot he searched for. Gabby gasped as he pressed harder and retreated again. Her walls clenched around him, begging him not to withdraw.

“Please, please,” she begged as his movements slowed yet he still brushed against the tender spot, sending sparks of desire running through her.

“Ahhh, there,” he murmured as he removed his glistening fingers, showing them to her before he put them in his mouth, sucking off her essence from his fingers.

“Do you want more?” Marcus’ hand reached for hers and pressed it against his rock-hard cock. “Or do you want this?”

“Both,” she responded as he unzipped his pants and rolled off the bed to remove the rest of his clothing. Moving beside her, he kissed her, letting her taste her own juices from his lips.

Gabby’s hand reached out to grasp his erection, swiping the liquid from the tip and sucking it off. He closed his eyes and groaned his pleasure.

“Not yet, sweetheart. I want to cherish every part of you. I’m selfish. I want you to remember how much I love you. No man will ever worship you the way I do. We’re made for each other. I messed up and I’ll pay the price by losing you to someone else. Never forget this night.”

A soft sob tore from her throat and Marcus placed his hand on her chest. “No, sweetheart. There’s no crying. We let go of the past and keep this one special memory to replace the pain. When I’m done, I want you to remember the love we shared.”

He waited until she nodded before he scooted lower in the bed and sank between her legs. “Close your eyes and feel me, Gabby.”

She did as he bid. Marcus held her soft skin back, gently using his tongue to circle the tiny pearl, before exploring between her folds. She sighed breathlessly as he teased her unmercifully. His warm breath started a fire inside her while his mouth stoked the flames, taking her higher and higher.

She squirmed beneath him and he wrapped his arms around her thighs, holding her prisoner while he sucked and licked to his heart’s content.

“Marcus,” her voice came out strangled.

“Yes, sweetheart,” he responded, his voice dropped low and husky.

“I need you,” she breathed out.

“You don’t need anyone. You’re the strongest woman I know. You give way more than you take. Yet, you loved me when I hated myself. I’m making you come, Gabrielle. Don’t hold back, let me feel you around me.”

Knight ducked his head lower and slid two fingers inside while he sucked on her tiny nub. Gabby clenched around him and her hips bucked as the wave of euphoria rushed forward, causing her to cry out, “Marcus!”

He continued until he felt the last wave of the orgasm leave her. Moving to her side, he placed a hand over her heart, which beat wildly.

“Do you feel all right?”

Gabby turned to face him. “Yes.” Her hand pushed him down upon the mattress and she held his arms down, making it clear she wanted her turn to explore. Knowing Marcus could easily flip her back over, she straddled his hips. Her bump rested against his belly and he laughed as the baby shifted. Marcus soon stopped when she gently raked her nails over his nipples and pulled them taut.

“I love how hard you feel. When you hold me, it’s like you’re made of steel. It made me feel protected and safe. I know you find me na?ve when I give a homeless person my last dollar while you impatiently wait. You believe I don’t know the danger. You’re very wrong. I approached only when you stood beside me because I knew you kept me safe. My ‘Knight’ fought for us. He protected me as I helped someone who didn’t feel secure. Most of all, he adored me.”

Gabby shifted herself over him, sliding up and down on his stiff rod. “Hmmm,” he moaned as she pulled his nipples. Her stomach impeded her from leaning down and sucking and she refused to move. She needed the feeling of control. Her hips undulated around him, causing the slickness between them.

Knight’s hands gripped her waist, slowing her. “Gabby. We don’t have condoms.”

She giggled. “Are you worried about me getting pregnant? We’re a bit late for that.”

He grinned and watched as the smile slowly left her face. “Unless…”

Flipping her over gently, he cupped her face. “I’ve not been with another woman. I know you’ve not slept with another man. Don’t go there, sweetheart.”

Knight lined himself at her entrance, not giving her time to let the doubts sink in. He eased his way inside until he filled her completely. She raised her legs, allowing him deeper. Looping his arms under her knees, he held them while he gently thrust in and out.

“Harder,” she cried as she gripped the sheets.

“I don’t want to hurt the baby,” he whispered.

“Damn it, Marcus. The baby’s fine. I want to come. If you don’t want this memory to end with me strangling you, give it to me, now,” she demanded.

Marcus beamed. His strokes went harder and he adjusted her legs, letting her feel every inch he gave her.

Gabby tightened around him like a vice as he watched her gorgeous breasts bob up and down with the motion.

She gripped the sheets as he thrust harder.

“Yes, yes,” she panted as he quelled the urge to surrender, dragging out her orgasm.

“Keep your eyes open. I want to see you come,” he ordered as she moaned louder.

Her hips raised to meet his in a frenzied motion. Knight grabbed her hips and held them firm. Gabby stopped breathing, stiffened and stared at him as the orgasm hit. “Ahhh,” she cried.

Her beauty as she cried out did him in and he pressed his way home until he struggled to hold back any longer. Knight surrendered to his need to claim her one last time. She milked every last drop from him as he slowed his movements.

Slowly pulling out, he watched her face. There was no evidence of hurt, only her loving eyes staring back, and he wished to capture the moment in his mind for however long it lasted. A gentle smile played on her lips. He got off the bed and helped her into the bathroom.

He waited until she finished, laid a towel on the counter and lifted her on it. He warmed a washcloth and wiped her clean, knowing she hated feeling sticky. Her arms looped around his neck as their foreheads touched.

“Thank you,” he whispered. “May I stay with you tonight or do you prefer to sleep alone?”

“Stay.”

Marcus picked her up and carried her to bed. She lay her head in the crook of his shoulder and he felt her tears run down his chest before he placed her on the bed. Once he adjusted the pillows, he snuggled in behind her. Gabby fell asleep while he listened to every breath she took and every sound she made, relishing every damn minute before he kept his promise and let her go.