Page 15 of Mic Drop (Passionate Beats #3)

Jenna

I busy myself making tea while I wait for Ma to wake, my mind on everything I have to do today.

First up is the interview with Jeremy Davis.

I need to convey to him that I’m all in at At Your Service PT, even though I’ve been touring with UC for the past months.

Downplay the Black Widow bull while extolling our physical therapists.

Discuss our upcoming new clinic yet keep Bennett’s proposal on the down-low. Easy peasey.

Despite it all, I can’t stop dwelling on the fact that Bennett asked me to marry him. Even more amazing was his confession that Ma gave him her blessing. By the time I got home yesterday from preparing with Court, she was already in bed. I need to ask her what changed her mind about him.

I check my texts. He sent me a photo of him blowing me a kiss, saying he can’t wait to do this in person again. I sigh. Me neither.

“That’s a big sigh.” Ma walks into the kitchen, stopping to hold on to the back of the chair.

How is it she seems to deteriorate every twenty-four hour period?

“Here,” I leap to my feet. “Let me help you. ”

She waves. “I’m good. You can pour me some orange juice, though.”

“On it.” I move to the fridge, keeping an eye on her as she settles into her chair. I place the glass on the table in front of her.

“What’s on your agenda for today?”

“We had a reporter reach out. He writes for a magazine in the record industry and wants details about the whole Black Widow thing.” I sit next to her.

Ma snorts. “Send him my way. I’ll tell him it’s all a load of crap.”

“We both know that. It’s my job today to convince him of it so he can write a good article.”

“What does Bennett say about this interview?”

Since when does she ask me about other people’s opinions?

Whatever my fiancé—I silently scream at his new position in my life—and she discussed must have been huge.

“He says it’s a reputable magazine. Now tell me, what switched your opinion about him?

Last we talked, you preferred Darren to him by a mile. ” I lean back in my chair.

She picks up her glass and takes a slow sip. She replaces it on the table and looks at me. “I remember what I told you before.” She shrugs. “I’ve changed my mind.”

“You don’t change your mind. Remember when I was in high school and begged you to buy me a black dress for prom. Even when all my friends were wearing black to the dance, you refused. I wore pink.” My arms cross.

Her shoulder lifts again. “You stood out. No use being a lemming.”

“Talk to me. What made you give him permission to marry me?”

She gasps. “He told you?”

“He asked me to be his wife,” I correct.

“Oh, honey!” She opens her arms, and I move to fall into them. How won’t I be receiving her amazing hugs this time next year? I close my eyes as realization sinks in that I’ll be missing more than her hugs all too soon. “Tell me all about it. ”

Needing to share something happy with her, I return to my chair and start from our fight and my snide remark about his mother.

Ma interrupts. “He’s not close with her, right?”

“Ma, she’s terrible. He told me about their strained relationship, but I didn’t believe him. I mean, what mother on earth would blame her only child for killing his twin in utero ?”

Ma’s hand flies in front of her open mouth. “Oh my God. That’s awful.”

I nod. “They were IVF babies. She was pregnant with twins, but only Bennett survived. Ever since, the woman’s claimed the twin was a girl and makes all sorts of comments to him like, ‘if your sister were here...’”

Her hand falls to her lap. “What about his father? Is he around?”

“He passed when Bennett was seventeen.” I pause. “The year he joined the band and left home.”

“At least he has his bandmates. I remember Darren telling me they were like brothers to him.”

How much should I tell her? I guess if she’s focused on Bennett’s story, she won’t be thinking about her own.

“His mother’s scars, plus the ones from Lissa way back then—not to mention the ones she’s putting on him now—left a lasting mark.

He doesn’t view the members of UC as anything more than coworkers.

” It feels so good to discuss this with someone else. Someone who loves him.

“What are you going to do to straighten your boy out?”

“Seems like I have my work cut out for me.” I sip my lukewarm tea. “But before we move on to fixing him, I want to know what he said to you that made you give him your blessing?”

“It’s not so much what he said,” she begins. “It’s what he did. When you arrived back here, you told me you ran out on him. There had been a big fight.”

“It wasn’t so much as a fight. More like a—” I trail off. “Well,” I sigh, “I guess it was a doozy of a fight. He wouldn’t let me explain and all I wanted to do was get here to be with you. ”

“As I said. You left him on bad terms.” She gives me one of her patented “mother knows best” expressions.

“Fine.” I dunk my spoon in the tea.

“And what did he do? Did he continue on tour with UC? Worse, hook up with one of the millions of willing women who surround him?” She drinks her juice. “No. None of that. He flew here, from his concert, to be with you for an afternoon . This told me everything I needed to know about him.”

A smile grows across my face. “He’s pretty wonderful like that.”

“He loves you, Sweet Pea. With everything he is, he loves you. Emotions like that don’t come around often, and when they do, you have to hold on to them.”

I can’t help but wonder if she’s referring to my father? Did they have a big romance at first, but life twisted it on its head? “Was it like that with you and Daddy?”

She rubs her forehead. “What we had burned bright and fizzled. I loved him, but we didn’t want the same things.

I wanted a family and to be a mother while he needed to be free.

” She scowls. “Don’t look at me like that.

I don’t regret spending years with him at all.

After all, he gave me you and your sister, my two greatest achievements. ”

“I don’t remember much about him.” I was five when they got divorced, but Ma never made me feel as if I was to blame.

“He’s a good man.” She’s speaking in the present.

I don’t have the opportunity to question her because she continues, “Bennett, however, knows who he is and what he wants. I thought he was cocky at first, but I think he puts it on as a mask to protect himself. Now that you’ve told me about his upbringing, I can understand where it comes from. ”

I add, “When you add Lissa to the mix, it does all make sense.”

“She’s causing quite the ruckus, isn’t she?”

“The problem is, Bennett doesn’t have anyone from back then in his corner. His mother certainly won’t give him any references. His father’s gone. The only person he was friends with back then”—I stare at the table. No need to air all of Bennett’s dirty laundry—“they lost touch years ago.”

“Your Bennett will figure it all out. The truth has a way of coming to light in the most unexpected ways.” Her voice is steady.

Her conviction rolls over me. “You really do love him, don’t you?”

“So long as he’s good to you, Sweet Pea, I’ll be happy to call him family. If he does something stupid, though, I’ll haunt him from the grave.” She chortles.

I sit in horror.

“Too soon?”

“You think?”

“We have to face facts. We both know how this is going to end, sooner rather than later.”

A lump forms in my throat. “I don’t want you to go.”

Her hand touches the top of mine. “Sometimes we don’t get what we want. But we get what we need.”

“Are you seriously quoting the Rolling Stones to me now?” Her words echo those Bennett said to me recently.

“I think their lyrics are slightly different, but you get my gist.” She smiles. “I believe Darren sent Bennett into your life to help you through my passing.”

I hate when she talks like this. I swipe yet another tear off my cheek. “It’s a beautiful way of putting things, but stop talking about your death as inevitable.”

“Oh honey, everyone leaves this plane sooner or later. But think of it this way. I’m leaving you with Bennett, and your sister with her family. I think I did pretty good with my time here.”

When she puts things in this perspective, it does sound like she’s had a life well lived. Still. “I wish we had more time. Time so you could see me as a bride on my wedding day. Play with my kids. Cheer on Kara’s kids as they make their way into the world.”

“Don’t you worry. I’ll be watching all of this from above. Just because I won’t be here, don’t think I won’t be a heartbeat away. ”

That does it. I break down and cry, hugging Ma close. She rubs my back as I feel some of her tears fall too. Then something amazing happens. It’s as if our talk gave me some catharsis, and for the very first time, I accept what the doctors told me.

I’m okay with her diagnosis.

Mostly.

We break apart. “Ma, I think I understand now. Let’s fill whatever time you have left with laughs and fun. Get together with Kara and her family to celebrate whatever milestones they have. Hopefully, Bennett will be able to get out here again soon, too.”

“Where is his tour taking him?”

“He’s in New Orleans now. I think they’re making their way across to California next.”

“The life of a rock star.”

“We’ll figure out a way to make it work.”

“Of that, Sweet Pea, I have no doubt.”

“I think we’ve covered all my questions,” Jeremy says. “Is there anything more you’d like to add?”

We’ve discussed my being called the Black Widow, the graffiti at the clinics, and Lissa’s claims against Bennett.

I’m not ready to let the world know about our engagement.

Nor do they have a right to find out about Ma’s situation.

Something about Lissa’s latest foray into the media niggles in the back of my mind, though.

“I met Lissa, you know.”