Page 11 of Master of Games (The Duke Fraternity #4)

CHAPTER TEN

Tabbie hardly slept and proceeded to spend the next day hiding. She wasn’t sure why…

She did know she did not get to call herself brave after this.

She wanted to be. She wanted to show Caden her scars and feel his acceptance. It would be a balm that her soul craved like no other.

But what if that wasn’t what happened? Could she survive another rejection?

Then again, what would she do with her life if she never tried?

Sit in this house and drink wine alone for the rest of her life? Write the novel about the woman who never tried?

With that in mind, she ordered a dinner tray brought up to her room with plenty of food for two and when it was delivered, she girded her loins, and knocked on the connecting door.

“Come in,” Caden called from the other side of the door. She opened it, to find him standing next to the bed, wrapping supplies into a sack.

Her blood ran cold. “What are you doing?”

“I’m returning to London in the morning.” He straightened, turning to face her.

She felt her stomach drop to her toes. He’d warned her, but it still felt like a rejection. “I see.” And then she spun on her heel, sorry she’d opened the door.

“Tabbie. Stop.”

She stilled but didn’t turn back toward him.

“I’m not quitting on you or on my proposal.”

The air whooshed from her lungs. “I heard you yesterday.”

“I was shot. I need to find the man who did it and have him arrested. Convicted. For everyone’s safety, including yours.”

“Oh.” Now she felt like a fool. Of course he needed to do that. “I understand.”

“When will you come to London?” he asked, and she heard him crossing the room.

“After Christmas. Unless my father wishes to Christmas in London. Which he might.”

“Months from now, then.” He touched her shoulder. “Would I be able to come visit again? After I’ve taken care of this threat?”

He was going to come back? “Don’t say it if you don’t mean it.”

He let out a long, slow breath. “Patience isn’t always my best virtue, but for you, I will patiently prove that you can trust me.”

Something in those words melted her heart. She turned to him and, before she even knew what she was doing, she set down the tray, and tossed herself into his arms.

He caught her, despite his injury, their lips crashing together.

She didn’t want to think about her fears or the future. She just wanted to feel him.

Tomorrow, she’d be in this house alone again. Why had she wasted today? “One more day,” she said between kisses, one of her legs wrapping about his waist. “Stay for one more day.”

“Done,” he answered, and then lifted her with his one arm, her other leg coming about his waist, her arms securely around his neck.

Their mouths devoured one another, their bodies grinding together as he carried her into her room, lowering her on the bed.

His body on top of hers, he flexed his hips to rub against her exactly where she needed it.

She cried out into his mouth, her fingers grasping his hair to pull him closer.

He kissed her again, their tongues tangled together before he lifted up, his breathing heavy as he stared down at her. “Don’t be afraid.”

“What…”

But she could only get out the single word before he slid down her body, flipping her skirts up her waist.

Her hip held several lashing scars but she couldn’t even think about them as he dropped to his knees, his head between hers.

“Caden.”

In answer, he tipped forward, his tongue darting out to run through the folds of her sex.

She gasped out a cry, her body arching as pleasure coursed through her. “Yes.”

His response was to repeat the touch, setting a rhythm that lit her body with desire as she once again found his hair and dug her fingers in, helping him move just where she needed his lips and tongue.

What they’d done before paled in comparison to this. She never dreamed that his touch could feel this good, be this deep.

And she just knew…she needed to chance his rejection. Whatever she feared, she had to consider what she might gain.

Keeping the rhythm of his tongue, he inserted a finger inside her. Every muscle in her body clenched as she tugged him even closer, her body so arched, she thought she might break.

And then she tipped over the edge, breaking into a thousand tiny, beautiful pieces.

She closed her eyes, her fingers relaxing in his hair, as she wilted into the bed. “Goodness gracious.”

“Did you mean, goodness Your Grace?”

She laughed, still breathless, her arm raising up over her head. He grabbed her skirts, shifting the fabric. She expected him to pull them down. Instead, he pushed them up a bit higher, his finger tracing the edges of her scars.

She tensed, resisting the urge to turn away.

He leaned over and trailed his lips along the edge of the damaged skin. “I have a secret.”

She’d been about to withdraw, but his words stopped her. “Not that you’re a bastard?”

“Everyone knows or guessed that one. This is one I guard. Only a few people know and only because they stumbled upon it.”

She pushed up on her elbows, tugging the fabric of her skirts even higher to try and see his face. “What is it?”

“I…” He flattened the fabric, his pained features coming into view as he lifted just enough to be seen. “I can’t read.”

Her brow furrowed together. “What?”

“I can’t read.” His face twisted into a painful expression she’d never seen before. “I’ve tried. I’ve had every tutor in the world.” He shook his head. “And forget about adding columns of numbers. I’m complete shit.”

Tabbie sat up, holding his face in both her hands. “That is your big secret?”

He blinked at her in surprise. “I’m mentally inferior and a bloody duke. It’s a big secret.”

She let out a long breath of air, not sure how to tell him that his inability didn’t change how she felt a bit. “I see.” And then her finger stroked across his cheek.

“No, you don’t. You bear scars that are badges of honor, and only skin deep. What’s underneath is pure and beautiful. I am broken. Defective.”

“Caden,” his name came out in a whisper, a sigh. And in it, she hoped a bit of a promise. Because she thought she might finally understand…

* * *

“Don’t pity me,” he said, pulling away. He hated the way her voice sounded just then.

But at his withdrawal, she gave a small cry of protest and snapped her legs together as she started to push down her skirts.

He rumbled, her eyes flying to him as he gently reached down and stilled her hand. “The rare person who discovers my…abnormality, always treats me like the most pitiful creature.”

She relaxed again, “I don’t pity you. I sympathize with the feeling that you’re worth less than everyone around you.”

He leaned closer again, pressing his stomach on her knees until she felt them give again, allowing his torso between her legs. “We understand each other, don’t we?”

“I think maybe we do.”

He reached up then, touching her cheek. “I understand if you don’t want to accept my proposal. All you need from me in this relationship is acceptance. I would require your actual support.”

Tabbie stared at him, her eyes wide. “Are you saying that you’d have the better side of the arrangement if we were to wed?”

“I know I would,” he answered, reaching for her ankle and wrapping his hand around it, his fingers overlapping.

He raised her leg, kissing the inside of the trim stocking-covered flesh.

“I’m the one with a terrible reputation and a worse secret deformity.

And unfortunately for you, I need a woman who will be strong enough to help me, not just be disappointed when I can’t be the man she needs. ”

Tabbie cocked her head then. “Are you not strong enough to give up your rakish ways?”

That one caught him off guard, and his mouth fell open before he snapped it shut.

Of course she would think that. And it might be a serious deterrent in accepting his proposal.

But how to answer in a way that would ring with the proper truth.

“I have lived that life, not because I enjoyed it, but because I hated myself and thought I wasn’t worth better.

But I’ve already told you, I put that past behind me. ”

A small squeak in her throat was the only noise she made before she scrambled up and wrapped her arms about his neck pulling him against her body. “Caden, don’t you know how few men would ever come to that realization? How special that makes you?”

“I’d rather talk about how special you are,” he whispered against her chest that his face had been nestled against. A very fortunate turn of events.

He snaked his arms around her waist, only wincing the smallest bit at the twinge in his injured arm.

“If by special you mean different—”

“I mean that no woman is as beautiful, smart, or as strong and I have no doubt you’ll keep me on the proper path.”

She stiffened his arms. “Other men would not agree.”

“Other men are fools.”

She relaxed again and he felt her smile against the top of his head. “I have a hard time believing that.”

“Wild and wanton. Beautiful and untamed. I don’t have much to recommend me personally, but I have always been able to recognize a woman of value and you, my sweet Tabetha, are more rare and more wonderful than any woman I’ve ever met.

Just because other foolish men cannot see past your scars, does not make you less miraculous.

It only makes them stupid. Furthermore, I don’t give a pig’s shit what anyone else thinks, and I don’t care to educate them.

Instead, I have every intention of hoarding your virtues all to myself.

I’ve always been terribly selfish that way… ”

“Ironheart, stop.” Tabbie’s throat closed, causing her voice to crack.

He’d been kind and gentle. But it occurred to him that what Tabbie might need was his strength. “I won’t. Now strip off your clothes and let me see the rest of these scars you’re so afraid I’ll reject you over. I plan to kiss every inch of them.”

“Please stop,” she begged, her voice cracking. “You know I can’t resist you. And if you reject me, unlike the rest of them, I think it will break me.”

“Tabbie,” he choked out her name. “Sweetheart. I am not going to reject you. Please…let me spend my life proving you’re worthy of love. I’m not good at much. You’ll have to make up for so many of my failings. But I can do that. I can show you how you look through my eyes.”

She pulled back then, looking down at him with so much uncertainty, he ached for her.

But he knew very well that no amount of scarring would frighten him away and it was time she learned this fact too.

And so, gently, slowly, he reached for the row of buttons at the back of her dress…