Page 67 of Madame X
“Don’t be upset, Three. You shouldn’t feel shame. Know your body, know your sexuality. In time, you will learn to control your sexual encounters. Even when you’re being fucked like I just fucked you, from behind, where you have no physical control over what might be happening to you, you will still able to exert influence over how enjoyable it is for your partner. You will be able to control how fast you both get off, how intensely. I can tell the difference when you fake it, Three. Some men may not be able to, but I can. When you genuinely enjoy and participate rather than just being a passive receptacle, you become a much more exquisitely erotic creature. When you were a whore, it didn’t matter. Your johns paid you to let them fuck you, and they didn’t give one single shit how you felt about it. But you are not a whore anymore, Three. You will not be paid for sex, implicitly or explicitly. Indigo Services does not provide sex workers; we provide companionship, partnership, and romance. If you have sex with a client, it will be your choice, a mutual decision between you and the client,afteryour service contract has expired. Keep this in mind, for tomorrow. The basic Indigo Services contract expressly forbids any kind of sexual act during the time frame of the services provided. If you choose to engage in sex with the client after the contract expires, that isyourchoice, and you should never feel pressured by the client. If you do experience pressure of any kind, report it to Lisa immediately and that client will be blacklisted. You should noteverbe pressured into sex by a client. And you shouldalwaysenjoy sex. Do you understand?”
“I understand.” Three’s voice is small, unsure.
“You enjoy a little pain with sex. I suspected as much, but now we know. Perhaps in the coming weeks, as youbegin working as an Escort, we will explore the limits of your enjoyment of pain.”
“But you won’t...hurtme, hurt me?” Three sounds breathy, eager, and a little afraid.
“No. Never. You are valuable. To me, and to Indigo Services, and ultimately, you should be valuable to the man who eventually chooses you as his Bride.”
“You think someone will choose me, Caleb?” Oh, the doubt, the fear, the vulnerability I hear cuts me to the bone.
“Three, dear Three.” I’m not the only one, judging by the tone of voice. “Yes. I do think someone will. How could they not? Your personality shines through in every situation. I realize this program is not the easiest thing to go through. Letting go of your name, your past... it’s never easy. But through it all, your beauty remains undeniable, and I refer to the beauty of your soul as well as the beauty of your body.”
I have never received such kind, genuine, uplifting words. Am I unworthy?
“Th-thank you, Caleb.”
“Congratulations, Apprentice Six-nine-seven-one-three, you are now an Escort.” This is said with great formality. “Have you chosen a name?”
“Rachel.” Three—Rachel, now, I suppose—sounds excited, gleeful.
“Why have you chosen this name?”
A pause. “You’ll laugh.”
I can almost—almost—imagine a subtle quirk of the lips. “I think not.”
“I used to watchFriendsa lot. You know, Ross, Rachel, Joey, Chandler, Phoebe, and Monica?”
“I am familiar. I don’t watch television, but it is a common enough part of pop culture that I’ve heard of it.”
“When I was a kid, I’d watch it with my older sister. She’d do her homework and I’d sit with her and—well, and then... when I ended up working for Slade, I’d watch it late at night. It was... a way to escape, I guess. And I always just loved Rachel the most.”
“Do you miss it?”
“What? WatchingFriends?”
“Yes.”
Three is quiet for a moment before answering. “Yeah, sometimes. I don’t miss none of—I don’t miss any of the rest of my past, obviously, butFriends? Yeah. They were likemyfriends. Their lives were better than mine. They had easy problems, so I could forget mine for a while. I miss that.”
“Perhaps something can be arranged. I do not believe in my girls being distracted by such triviality as television, as you know, but perhaps as a reward for achieving Escort certification I could arrange a viewing for you.”
“And the other girls?”
“It is a reward for you, Rachel.”
“Which means I can share it, right?”
“Very well, then. Lisa will be in to review and brief you for tomorrow. Once again, congratulations.”
Loafers tread quietly away, and I see a hint of white door as it opens, thethud-clickas it closes. I wait several more long moments.
“Come on out, he’s gone.” Rachel’s hand appears in front of my face, waving me out from under the bed.
I scoot out, sore and stiff, and stand up on wobbly legs. Brush dust away, straighten my clothes. Rachel lounges on her bed, naked. Her breasts are slight, areolae pale pink around her nipples. She is shaved totally bare between her thighs, whereas I am not. I smell sex in the air, musk, seed, pheromones, sweat.
I don’t know what to say, what to do. Congratulate her? I don’t know. It’s hard to look at her. I keep hearing her moans, the sound of her being spanked, how thoroughly she enjoyed it. I can almost see her, bent over the bed, hair in her face, pale skin of her buttocks reddening with each slap. I push away the images.