Page 6 of Love.V2 (Occupational Hazards #2)

Tess

I glanced around the messy room frantically, trying to use the techniques I’d learned from my years of sporadic therapy. Steady breathing. Find three orange things in the room. Three books.

Focusing outside of my body was grounding, but it also helped me think about something other than the fact that I was in my boss’s office hyperventilating, that Dylan had strolled into the conference room and had hardly given me a second look.

My head dropped into my hands. Twelve years, twelve years , and his gaze had passed over me like I was a piece of furniture.

I bit my lip, wiping a stray tear off my cheek. I needed to get a hold of myself.

The door opened with a waft of stale office air. Too late .

Dylan stood in the doorway, framed by the fluorescent lights behind him.

Of course he would walk in right at that moment, when I was at my weakest. Unlike earlier in the conference room, I was the only one here. Our eyes met and that same familiar, gasping tightness closed in around me.

I was going to cry. Oh, no. Oh no oh no oh no .

I shoved to my feet, pacing to look out the window, hoping the sunlight might dry the tears pooling behind my eyelids. But I wasn’t fast enough. I’d seen it all: The way his eyes had widened. The flash of emotion that passed across his face. Pity?

“Tess.”

The sound of my name coming out of his mouth was torture. I shook my head once, holding up a hand to stop him from coming any closer.

He stayed where he was, but I could feel him studying me. Was he remembering our life together like I was? All the good, the bad, and the ugly? Was he, like me, wondering where the hell it had all gone wrong and led us here ?

I swiped under my eyes with shaking hands. I would not cry. I would not cry . But it was hard to hang onto that conviction as the thrum of the air conditioning system and a decade’s worth of regrets filled the air between us.

The silence stretched and solidified, dragging the weight in my stomach down, down, down. There was nothing to say, no way to break this horrible, heavy silence without—

“I like your hair.”

“What?” His opener was so unexpected, so stilted, it surprised a full sentence out of me. “No, you don’t.”

In the dim reflection of the window, I saw his outline shift, hands shoved into pockets. “It suits you.”

Hot, resentful flames flooded my throat so fast, I nearly choked. I half-turned, glaring at him from the corner of my eye. “You hate dyed hair. You told me once you thought it looked trashy. ”

Did he think I wouldn’t remember? Was this his way of hurting me? Barging into my workplace and calling me—

“I don’t remember saying that,” he said, hesitant, like he really was wracking his brain. “I’m sorry if I—obviously, I was wrong. Before. Sorry.”

The Dylan in the window pinched the bridge of his nose, a move he only made when he was stressed or failing at something, as rare as that was. Seeing it smothered the fire of irritation in me as quickly as it had flared to life.

This was dangerous. There were a thousand emotions spinning inside me, all of them battling for dominance, and I wasn’t sure which would win.

“Tess,” he started. My muscles clenched. He sounded so small. Soft and sad and he somehow made my name seem like a question I didn’t know the answer to.

“Dylan! You sure you don’t want a coffee before we get started?” Eric’s cheerful voice cut through the moment, and the world came rushing back into focus. My co-workers outside the office door. The beeping of computer notifications. The soft music Meery liked to play over the speakers.

Dylan responded, but I was too focused on my breathing to hear. I felt the resonance of his voice all the way to my bones, though. I knew what he sounded like in the mornings before he’d had his coffee. Late at night after a party, whispering in my ear when he’d had more wine than usual.

I knew what he sounded like when he couldn’t be bothered to speak at all .

I bit the inside of my cheek, still lost in the tangle of emotions sucking me down into the carpet. I scrambled to think of something to hold off the tears. What had Vanna said this morning?

Eff him . He was the one who had ruined what we had together. He was walking in on my life. I swallowed, steeling myself and gathering my resolve. I could do this. I could be strong.

“Tess, great job today. Everything we do here is a team effort, but I know you did most of the work on those slides. Good stuff.”

I tipped my head up to look at Eric. My vision was clearer, the tears gone for now. I could do this. “Thank you.”

If my voice sounded weak or watery, he didn’t comment on it, instead settling down on the neon green sofa while I sank into a chair.

No boring conference table or corporate furniture for Jinx’s founder.

His office was a direct reflection of Jinx’s bright, counter-cultural reputation.

It was like Nickelodeon had exploded in here.

“Listen, I’ll cut straight to it. I know there are some people in the office who are less than excited that Worther attended our annual meeting today.

” He gave me a dry look. We both knew he was referring to Victoria, who had practically thrown a fit when we’d learned the Worther team would be “spying” on our internal meeting, as she put it.

She’d railed at anyone who would listen about how the larger company was going to take over and squash our creative process.

I’d been too busy reeling at the news for different reasons to give her a second thought. Dylan shifted where he sat next to Eric.

“That’s why I kept it quiet that Dylan was coming today. I didn’t want it to seem like it was a coup. But…some things are about to change around here. ”

Something about the way he said it, paired with the announcement of Dylan’s extended stay, sent a shiver of worry down my spine. A new addition to the teeming feelings bubbling in my stomach, making me dizzy. This was all wrong. I wanted out of here.

Eric continued, unaware that I’d been diminished to a wobbling pile of anxiety masquerading as a conscious person.

“I know we’ve had a few misses recently on new business proposals.

You’ve only been here for six months, and you’ve been doing a great job, Tess, but I won’t lie.

Worther is putting pressure on us to close more business.

We’ve been under the Worther brand for a year now. Our honeymoon period is over.”

I nodded, clasping my hands to keep from picking at my cuticles or breaking into sobs. In for four…hold it together, Tess.

“They’re hoping we can take that ‘secret sauce’ Dylan mentioned earlier and expand it to bigger clients and larger deals. If we want to play with the big dogs, we have to stretch. Right?”

“So, what does this mean for Jinx? I know you said you didn’t want it to look like a coup, but…

” I trailed off, attempting to push the rising panic down.

I couldn’t go back to working like I had at Worther.

There was a difference between churning out mediocre ads and the type of magic we created at Jinx.

Worther’s hyper-focus on profit choked out a lot of creativity. Here, I felt like I could breathe.

These last six months had been hard, but for the first time in my life, I actually liked my job. Really, I loved it.

“I’ve built this company into something I’m proud of. It’s important we keep our culture intact,” Eric assured, but his usually smiling face turned serious. Unease slithered through me again. “But we are under pressure to grow. And all of this is coming at an awkward time.”

“Awkward?” I knew about awkward. Dylan sat mere feet away while I held back tears, actively searching for some sense of up or down in the emotions tossing me around like a tornado.

“Tess, I’m hoping for your discretion. We brought you on because I was the sole executive here, and I needed the help. Now, six months later, I realize I’m more than just burned out.” A softness came over Eric’s face that I didn’t like. “My time at Jinx has come to an end.”

A gasp left my mouth, and my racing thoughts went quiet for a split-second. Of all the awful, unexpected things that had happened in the last hour, this one came out of nowhere. “I thought Jinx was your baby?”

“Of course Jinx is my baby. But babies grow up, don’t they?

And I’ve grown, too. It’s time to move on to the next thing.

If you stay in one place for too long, trying to hold on to the way things were instead of the way things are, you’ll be stuck and unhappy forever. I deserve more, and Jinx does, too.”

“I don’t know what to say.” Eric was Jinx. The thought of him leaving was overwhelming. I could feel Dylan’s burning stare, but determinedly avoided his gaze.

Eric smiled. “You’ve been doing great work to figure out your place here. Now, though, Tess, I’m going to need you to do a bit more.”

I shoved down the threat of tears before it could overtake me again. “I know some of the recent proposals weren’t ideal. I can do better, Eric, I promise. ”

“I know you can, but I’m not just talking about pitches.

” Eric leaned back, including Dylan in the conversation.

“You get this place, in and out, but you also understand how Worther wants us to work. I’m hoping you can be the bridge between the two, helping Jinx keep its identity without getting lost in Worther’s corporate machine. Especially as Dylan replaces me.”

My heart thunked, recognizing the impact of his announcement before the rest of me did. His words didn’t compute. Something in my brain felt mushy, gone soft with the flood of news and Dylan and awfulness of this day.

“Dylan,” His name burned in my throat, but I forced myself to keep talking. To ask the question. To clarify, because surely he didn’t mean… “replaces you?”

Eric clapped Dylan on the shoulder, beaming. “Meet your new CEO.”

In the wake of his declaration, my brain checked out and a decade’s worth of habit took over my body. I looked at Dylan.

He was looking right back, completely unreadable except for the slight divot between his brows. CEO? He was supposed to become CEO at Worther. Why would he throw that away to come here?

For me ? I squashed the thought before it had time to take root in my brain. Of course he hadn’t come here for me. I’d never taken precedence over his corporate ladder-climbing before; why would that change now?

“We’re keeping it under wraps for now, of course.

” Eric smiled and rambled on, oblivious to the tension thrumming between me and Dylan.

It hurt to look at him, and yet, I couldn’t tear my eyes away.

“ A leadership transition is a delicate thing. The plan is to bring him on for a few of the bigger proposals coming up, get him integrated. If it’s a good fit, we’ll announce the transition when everyone’s more comfortable with him.

We don’t want it to seem like Worther is coming in and changing everything up. Right?”

“Right,” Dylan responded. I’d lost track of the conversation, but he was following perfectly well, despite staring at me steadily. I didn’t know what to do with that.

Finally, I looked away, trying to ignore the feeling of his eyes on me.

“Dylan, I know you brought a new proposal for us. Big national account, lots of feel-good stuff. I’d like you to work on it, just the two of you.

Get your feet wet, so to speak…” Eric trailed off, looking between us.

“Actually, it just occurred to me. You were both at Worther. Have you worked together before?”

“No!” I blurted before Dylan could answer. “No, we never worked closely together.”

We’d filed taxes jointly, but that hadn’t been the question. Dylan and I had always been in separate departments. Some of our work might overlap, but we’d never worked together, directly.

And for some reason, my mushy, sluggish brain believed it was imperative to keep my history with Dylan a secret. Back at Worther, almost everyone knew me as “Dylan’s girlfriend.” Did I really want to be “Dylan’s ex” here?

My heart lurched. This was all too much. I had too many questions and feelings, and I needed to get out of here.

“I have a meeting in a bit, but if you two would like to hash the proposal out and get started on planning, I’m sure we can—”

“Actually, Eric, I’m sorry, but I have somewhere to be.” Like, in bed, hyperventilating. I stood, and the two men rose as well. “I’d love to know more about the project if you could send it over.” Lie . “I’ll take a look and start thinking about it tonight.” Lie number two.

Eric looked surprised, either because I’d never interrupted him before, ever, or because I had only left the office early once, for a dentist appointment.

“Of course. Do what you need.” Eric turned to Dylan while I gathered my things. “You two can find some time to discuss in the next few days. Usually, Tess is the first in and the last out. Worker bee, this one.”

“Really?”

Surprise dripped from Dylan’s words. I’d never been the “worker bee” before, but things changed when you actually liked your job and didn’t have a life outside of your office.

I aimed a strained smile in their direction and pulled the door closed behind me. I didn’t want to hear anything else from Dylan. I didn’t want anything else to do with this day.

I was so, so done. And even when I crawled into bed with Netflix and a trusty pint of Ben & Jerry’s after leaving a voicemail on Vanna’s phone, the same thought kept cycling through my head.

Dylan’s here. What do I do now?