Page 11 of Love, Nemesis (Ocean to Ashes #2)

He continued to chant as he threw in brush and branches, drinking as a fire built in the pit and grew with each addition he threw in until there was a wild blaze.

He chanted louder as if to match it, laughing with the figures and familiar faces he saw in the flames. “Trade gold for fire and wine!” he shouted. The wind picked up; the forest moved with it.

The fire blazed in his chest and spun dark chatter in his brain. The world twisted and breathed and danced until he felt like there was no divide between his skin and the surrounding air, his feet and the ground beneath him.

His shouting faded into dazed mumbling before stark, violent images flashed around him with almost physical force.

He fell back against a tree. He curled his hand up near his head, dropping the empty bottle and the extinguished cigarette. He gripped his hair in his hands as he rested his forehead against his knees and laughed.

After a moment, he leaned back against the tree, tilting his head up and staring up at the sky, looking for that red balloon from the carnival in his early life, or any other memory that could ferry him away from the present.

The stars waited instead, and he stared, the faint light of sunrise giving him a track of time. He stood up, mouth dry as he used the tree for support. He found his horse, saddling up and hopping on before making his way back toward town.

* * *

Manaj was sitting on the porch by the early dawn light when Lethe rode up.

“Good morning,” he said to Manaj as he rode up near the porch. He waited on his horse but said nothing. The birds could be heard in the distant trees, waking with the sunrise.

Manaj moved out of his chair, limping down the stairs until he was beside Lethe. He offered him a glass of water with a single basil leaf.

Lethe accepted and drank, resting the empty glass on his leg as he waited on the horse.

“You know, I’m still an adventurer,” Manaj said, reaching for the glass again and cradling it in his weathered hands.

“You remind me all the time,” Lethe rasped.

Manaj returned to the porch and grabbed a saddle bag. He approached Lethe, who took it, attaching it with the others as he avoided Manaj’s eyes.

“Sometimes I think it would be nice to go off again, see the big, new world since the Great Light’s changed it all. I get a little restless. You know, I once jumped on a horse as it was running by, rode it throughout the night to what’s now Fort Nahl. It—”

“Wouldn’t be there if you hadn’t warned them about the Strike. I know, Manaj,” Lethe replied, eyes still set on the horizon.

He lowered his head, exhaling before he saw Manaj nudge an orange against his hand.

Lethe took it, finding the old man’s face to see him smiling. “Don’t hurt too many people, please, and eat that orange now, the peel, the entire thing. You have the breath of a dragon.”

Lethe raised his eyebrows as he took the orange.

“You won’t kill us,” Manaj said, starting the script he used a few nights before. “You won’t hurt a petal—”

“On the most fragile flower. Life is precious. No exceptions. Got it.”

“You skipped a section,” Manaj corrected, promptly.

“It’s fine.” Lethe rolled his eyes.

“You skip lines, and you will forget. Discipline is freedom, Lethe. If you forget discipline, you will slip deeper into the captivity of your other side.”

“Why is freedom so important again?” Lethe mumbled, inspecting the orange as he rolled it in his hand. “Why is slipping into the captivity of my ‘other side’ so terrible?” He quoted Manaj with a casual tone that made light of the words.

“Because if the gluttonous man eats all of the food, he’ll starve. If you want to survive, you need restraint. If you want restraint, you need discipline.”

“Survival.” Lethe sighed. “You act like that’s all I want out of life.”

“All animals care about is survival. On the days when you are more man than animal, I appeal to the man in you. Lately, my options have been limited,” Manaj replied without hesitation.

“Of course,” Lethe nudged the horse with his heel. “See you later, old man.”

Manaj nodded, folding his hands behind his back. “One last thing. Last night. I know where you went.”

“Just reminiscing with friends,” Lethe replied, squinting against the morning sun. “You’ve really been on me lately, you know that?”

“You’ve made me more uneasy lately,” Manaj said. “I care deeply for you, and so one day, I hope you learn that demons of the past are not your friends.”

Lethe chuckled. “If you’d learned that a long time ago, I don’t think we’d be talking right now.” He raised an eyebrow.

“You are a psychopath after all, Jamie says,” Manaj joked back. His expression then became resolute. “You’ve done inexcusable things, but when they had to be done. Sometimes good people can’t find another way.”

“Some would say people are bad because they can’t find the other way,” Lethe said, stirring restlessly on his horse. “But you know I don’t deal in heroes and villains. I’ve met plenty who claimed to be either, and life was never choosy about how they bled.”

“You’ve seen a lot and made the arrogant mistake of thinking you’ve seen it all.” Manaj held his patient smile.

“Not keen on seeing anymore,” Lethe shot back as he shifted restlessly in his saddle, prepared to leave.

“I hope this trip is much longer than you plan for it to be,” Manaj replied.

Lethe raised an eyebrow. “What is that supposed to mean?”

The old man shrugged.

“Stubborn.” Lethe shook his head and faced forward, turning the horse away from the fort. He had a single objective, to find Evira and settle an old score. It shouldn’t take more than a few days. “I don’t like it when you say things like that. I feel like the universe does what you want.”

Manaj laughed. “Says the man who doesn’t believe in anything more than luck and chance.”

“I’ll see you in a few days,” Lethe replied, resolute. Without another word, he rode off, catching up with Cal who’d taken the southern road toward the State.

Cal turned around when he heard the horse, stopping as Lethe pulled up beside him.

“So, this means we have a deal?” Cal said when Lethe was within earshot.

“Take me to Evira and I’ll answer your questions.”

“You’ll talk about what really happened in the war?” Cal replied eagerly.

“I’ll share enough to get you some recognition, but there are some things that not even the greediest idiots in En Sanctus will talk about, and I didn’t get through the war by just being able to fight. I knew when to keep my mouth shut.”

“Works for me,” Cal said, and they started off.

It was a lengthy ride to the border, and Lethe watched the clouds above, speeding or slowing as they passed through the distorted time. Cal stopped at the edge.

“You ready to say goodbye?” Cal asked. “Evira is in Richter. It’s a coastal town a few days’ ride from here.”

Lethe didn’t look back. “Let’s go.”