Page 4 of Love Me Now: Baltimore & Madelyn
An hour later, Heir and I sat rooftop at the Pensacola Tornados baseball stadium overlooking Escambia Bay. Tornado Bistro & Wines was Heir’s favorite brunch spot. As we waited for our meals, neither of us said anything. Saddened by the state of melancholy we were under, I attempted to shift the atmosphere.
“It’s a beautiful day,” I said. Heir simply agreed with a soft smile.
“What did Adir want? I saw him leaving and… My mother who never raises her voice broke a glass.” She giggled a little as I sheepishly glanced away.
Really, I didn’t want to talk about Adir or what he was requesting that I do. Then again, the last time I kept anything from my child, it ended in tragedy. I’d yet to tell her the extent of what I’d faced with her father. In some ways, I was still protecting Duval and that angered me.
Taking in a deep unsteady breath, I decided to come clean. “He came to see me about the baby.”
Heir’s sharp gaze snagged mine. Tears clouded my daughter’s eyes, but she held herself together. “What about him?” she asked lowly.
Peering out over the baseball field, I replied, “The Graces are putting him up for adoption.”
“What?” Heir hissed. “They can’t do that!” Even with tears in her eyes, the conviction in her tone knocked me in my chest.
“Adir wants me to…” I couldn’t even say it. My throat clogged horribly.
“Mom,” Heir started, “as much as this hurts, that baby is innocent.We’reinnocent.”
I closed my eyes to stave off any moisture building up. “I know.”
“Then you have to do something,” she implored. For a minute, we both fell quiet. Then Heir added, “If there’s anyone I know who’s able to love that baby despite what got him here, it’s you. For almost twenty-one years, I’ve watched you be the best wife and mother any woman could be. Your heart is pure and big, Mama. Dad is dead. Don’t allow what he did to change the type of heart you have. He’s in a grave, and I be damned if I sit back and let you allow him to control you from the pits of hell he’s burning in.”
Swift pain seized my heart. The truth lied in Heir’s eyes.
“You didn’t have to tell me what you were going through, Mama. That weekend you came to see me, I saw how dead your eyes were, and I knew. After you left, I cried like a baby because I knew you were going home to a monster.”
Standing from my seat, I rounded the table and wiped my daughter’s tears before hugging her.
“I’m so sorry,” I told her.
“It’s not your fault,” she responded as I went back to my seat. “The same grace you need to give yourself, I want you to extend to the baby. He needs a family’s love. This family is where he belongs.”
We fell silent again as the waiter brought our food. As we ate, we were both content listening to the chatter of other patrons and enjoying the scenery. As much as I hated to admit it, Heir was right. While he was alive, Duval had controlled so much of my life. Once a vibrant, free-spirited woman, I allowed him to turn me into a reserved shell of myself. I didn’t dress the same, talk the same, and I didn’t love the same. All because I allowed myself to be wrapped up with someone whose values and morals depleted along the way.
Valentine’s Day was at the end of the week and instead of spending it wrapped up in love, I was spending it wrapped up in anger and grief. The lover girl side of me truly hated that. Even at forty-seven, I loved love and was a helpless romantic to my core.
After brunch, Heir and I went home and retreated to our separate spaces. While going through the motions of the rest of my day, I recalled everything Heir said and tucked it away.
As I laid down to sleep that night, I decided that facing my traumas would have to wait. I wasn’t ready to forgive Duval for the position he’d put me in. Neither was I ready to accept that my own son followed in his father’s footsteps.
CHAPTER 2
BALTIMORE COOLEY
UnlikeafewfuneralsI’d attended, this one wasn’t capped off by droplets of rain. There was no ray of sunshine beaming down, prompting anyone to think the souls lost were smiling down on them. Gloominess surrounded those standing graveside as the two men’s empty caskets were lowered into the ground.
Soft cries tore at my heart. Her hands clung to me as she buried her face into my arm. I didn’t move an inch. Whatever strength she needed, I provided. Although I couldn’t hold her in return, I stood here and let her cling to me.
When Maddie’s light went out, I leaned back on the patio chair and took a swig of my beer. My shift ended hours ago, yet I was here nursing a drink, pretending as though I was too exhausted to move. Really, I lingered around just in case Maddie needed me. Night shift had already made their rounds, and I was sure they wondered what the hell I was still doing over here.
The answer was simple and yet so damn complicated. Simply put, the lover man in me couldn’t walk away. He couldn’t comprehend how to put one foot in front of the other and tear himself away from this damn woman.
Therein lay the complication: the woman. It was one thing to be in love with a woman who belonged to me. It was another story to be in love with a woman who was my boss.
The ringing of my phone pulled me away from staring at Maddie’s window. Dayton’s name flashed on the screen. Older than me by two years, my brother was the CEO of our family’s real estate firm. When he wasn’t doting on his wife and kids, buying up properties, and attending business meetings, Dayton was on my line bugging the shit out of me.
“‘Sup?” I answered my brother’s call.