Page 37 of Love is Fake (Love is Everything #1)

Chapter

Nineteen

Things between Kiara and Kai are proceeding at pace and I’m truly happy for her.

We haven’t talked about the elephant in the room.

I know for a fact Kai has tried to tell her what happened between me and Lennox, but Kiara has stopped him every time.

She knows I don’t want to hear it and she has no desire to play piggy in the damn middle.

In moments of weakness, I’ve been tempted to ask the fateful words.

“Did he say anything about me?”

But I’ve managed to stop myself.

They’re the same moments when I think about going onto social media or searching the news for his name. So far, I’ve managed not to crack, and it’ll only get easier from here on out, right?

Days go by and then a week – apart from the initial flurry of voicemails and texts, all of which I ignored, the name Lennox stopped appearing on my phone several times a day.

I guess he got the message, finally. Even for someone as thick-headed as him, me not answering for days at a time is a pretty clear indicator that I don’t want anything to do with him.

At least that’s what I thought. It turns out Lennox is more thick-headed than most.

It’s late at night, ungodly late. Even though I’m not asleep, the buzzing of my doorbell annoys me. I frown at the video screen not instantly recognizing the big man loitering there with a ball-cap pulled low against the rain.

I press on the intercom. “Wrong apartment.”

“Isabella?”

Everything inside me goes still at the voice, at his voice and the sound of my name wrapped in its huskiness. Even after everything, just hearing him makes my heart beat louder, faster and somehow slower, all at the same time.

“Go away, Nox.”

I’m proud at how strong I sound against the crumbling of my defenses.

“Please, Izzy, if you’d just let me explain -,”

I put my hands over my ears because I can’t deal with this, not now.

I’ve managed to get to a place where I felt like I was doing better, where I wasn’t walking around in a fog of heartbreak the whole time.

Where I wasn’t crying myself to sleep every night and waking up each morning knowing the pain the day would bring.

Or maybe I was and I was just getting better at hiding it.

Either way, I was less of a basket-case than I had been.

“Sometimes you don’t get to have it all, Nox. You don’t get to have a damn fiancée and have me. You don’t get to keep me on the backburner just in case your first choice falls through,” I explain to him tightly.

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you, about me and Honey -,”

“Nox!” The sound of her name is like a knife going through me. “We’re not talking about this. There’s nothing to talk about. It’s over.” I hit my forehead against the wall, telling myself I’m doing the right thing.

Lennox’s broad shoulders roll as he sighs and as he looks directly into the camera; I wonder how the hell I’m ever going to get over him.

It’s bad enough he’s impossible to avoid with his face on billboards, on every sports channel and magazine, but he made me feel more than anyone I’ve ever met.

And that’s what I can’t forgive him for – he made me want him, only him and now I don’t know how to want anyone else.

“When you’re ready, call me, Iz. Please.” There’s a desperate quality in his tone, which gets to me even though I don’t want it to. “There’s a lot you need to hear.”

“Don’t hold your breath,” I snipe, biting my lip to keep my voice from wobbling. “Go home, Nox. Please. If you care about me at all, just leave me alone.”

Something in my tone must tell him I’m on the verge of losing it and I watch the video feed as he hesitates for a moment before stepping back.

He takes one last look at the screen and holds his hand up in a goodbye.

As he steps away, my hand goes to the intercom, ready to tell him to wait, to come up, to make everything alright.

But then my sanity returns and I snatch my hand away, forcing myself to take a step back.

Whatever Lennox has to tell me, it won’t undo the hurt he’s caused, the damage. I can’t even think about being with someone I don’t trust and I’d be stupid if I trusted Lennox after everything that’s happened between us.

I still have the vacation time Kiara has given me and there’s only one place I want to be, only one place I can start to feel better. Somewhere far away from Lennox and his midnight visits to my mind, and now even my front door.

I book my flight to Alabama for the following day, planning on making it a surprise for my dad. I ignore the voice in my head telling me I’m running away. I push that voice right down into the bottom of my suitcase and struggle to get the oversized case out of the door.

“You ever heard of travelling light?” The familiar voice makes me snap my head up in surprise before I’ve even managed to lock the door behind me.

“Kai!” I jump, holding my hand over my chest. “You scared the crap out of me!”

“Good to see you too, Iz-meister.” Kai smiles broadly at me, opening his arms and – despite his connection to Lennox, despite the fact I’m sure he must have known exactly what was going on the whole time – I want to go in for a hug. But I don’t and Kai’s lips turn down at the edges.

“Don’t make that face, you look like a sad clown,” I tell him, blandly.

“You’re pissed at me too? I thought you’d be happy to see me because I’m so adorable.” He shrugs as if that were a self-fulfilling prophecy.

“I’m not pissed at you, Kai.” I cross my arms because I do really want to hug him - Kai gives good hugs, it’s one of the things I like most about him. “I’m just disappointed.”

“Ouch!” Kai’s hands go to his heart as if I’ve scored a direct hit. “When your parents used the ‘d’ word, that was the worst.”

“Well, lucky for both of us, I’m not your mom.” I check the time on my watch, even though I know I’ve got plenty of time before my plane as I’m Chronically Early Girl . It’s a crappy superhero name but at least it’s accurate.

I frown at him. “What are you doing here, Kai? And how did you even get in anyway?”

My building security is pretty tight and my neighbors aren’t the type to just let anybody in.

Kai has the decency to look sheepish as he holds out a keyring I recognize.

She wouldn’t!

He sees the anger in my expression and starts using calming motions with his hands. “Don’t get pissed with Kiki!”

Kiki? Seriously? I file that gem away to give her crap about later.

“Why would Kiara give you the keys to my apartment?” I love my best friend and I know she wouldn’t have done it without a good reason, or if she had then I may have to kill her.

“Because I told her the truth about what happened with Nox and you and that walking coat-hanger.” I’m guessing that’s Bitch Barbie or she-who-shall-not-be-named. “And once I told her what I’m about to tell you, she gave me the keys in case you wouldn’t let me in and listen to me.”

Kai explains at speed, as if he knows he only has a few seconds to convince me.

He’s gauged it well, having my best friend’s blessing is pretty much a touch-down.

But I’m still suspicious, especially as Kiara and I have agreed she wouldn’t get involved even though she was dating Kai.

Either way, this is a rabbit hole I don’t want to go down.

Getting over Lennox was already proving nigh-on impossible; I don’t need to give the fire of feelings I still have for him any additional fuel.

“Kai, I’ve got a plane to catch, so either we need to speed this up or you can tell me when I get back.”

“You’re leaving?” Kai asks, and I gesture towards my suitcase, raising an eyebrow. “Where’re you going?”

“I’m going home, Kai.” I don’t dwell on how ‘home’ used to be the place I shared with Lennox. “I need to get away from here for a while, away from Nox and his damn face plastered on the billboard I walk past every day to get my damn morning coffee!”

I snap my mouth shut as Kai gives me a sympathetic look.

“We miss you, you know, Iz? He misses you.”

I shake my head because I don’t want to hear it, although I also do, I really do. Confusing doesn’t even begin to cover all my feelings around Lennox.

“I bet, now you don’t have anyone to watch trashy box-sets with,” I joke, purposely ignoring his mention of Lennox.

Kai sighs, signaling he hasn’t missed my evasion.

“This is for you.” He holds out a crisp white envelope.

“What is it?” I frown at it, arms still crossed.

“Only one way to find out.” He waggles it in the air in front of me, before rolling his eyes melodramatically. “It’s an envelope, Iz, not an atomic bomb.”

Slowly, I reach out and take it, popping open the seal and looking inside. Part of me expects a note from Lennox or maybe a copy of my NDA to remind not to say anything about what has gone down at the Gray Mansion.

It takes me a moment to realize what I have in my hands.

I really must have lost track of things because the ticket has today’s date and it’s the first pre-season game for the Pelicans, for Lennox.

People pay top dollar for these ‘glass’ tickets, right behind the player’s bench.

It’s as close as you can possibly get to the players and the action.

“He wants you there, Izzy.” Kai’s voice interrupts my thoughts.

“If that’s true, why didn’t he bring it himself?” I ask.

“Would you have let him in the door?” Kai gives me a knowing look and I don’t disagree with him. The last interaction I had with Lennox, I wasn’t in the most receptive of moods.

“What about Honey?” I almost choke on her name. Evil Bitch-Face sounds more accurate anyway.

“Honey’s history, Iz, she has been for a long time. If you picked your phone up every now and again you’d know that.”

“He couldn’t even choose me in front of her, Kai. And I’m not a homewrecker. I’m not the kind of girl who fights for things that don’t rightfully belong to her.”