Page 57 of Love Bleeds

What in the world was wrong with me?

"Okay to turn the lights off?" Damian asked as if I wasn't behaving in a completely silly manner. But then, he didn't truly remember me, so maybe he thought this was normal for me?

My cheeks burned even hotter at that thought. "Please turn the lights off."

Blessed darkness descended upon us.

Did vampires have color-vision in the dark?

I hoped not.

"Can you... uh... how does your darkvision work?" I asked. "Is it like inDungeons & Dragonswhere you can see better in low light, but only in black and white?"

If theDungeons & Dragonsreference confused Damian, he didn't let it show. "I see colors," he said. "But they're muted."

So did that mean he could see me blush or not? I exhaled, trying to push the thought from my mind. As if I didn't have more important matters to worry about. Like how Damian was in the same bed with me but somehow still too far away.

Why couldn't he just act the way he had before? When he'd simply pulled me into his arms when I was falling asleep. I wanted that again.

But I couldn't make myself say it.

He'd think I was needy, or weird, orconfused.

I didn't want him to think that. Even if I was. Confused, I mean. Not needy or weird.

Well, okay, maybe those things too.

"Good night," I made myself say, before I could make myself say anything more stupid than that.

"Good night," he echoed.

I closed my eyes and tried to pretend that everything was exactly the way it should be.

It wasn't easy.

* * *

It was around midnight when I gave up. I was tired of being in a bed with Damian and wanting to be closer to him but not actually daring to do anything about it. I was tired of not being able to understand what was going on inside my own head.

Needing to get away for a bit, I left the bed and the room as quietly as I could so I wouldn’t rouse Damian.

On my way down the stairs, I noticed that the lights were on in the kitchen. Since I didn't actually want to be alone, I checked to see who it was.

Remy, of course. The kitchen was his domain, after all. Even if this wasn't his house. Or maybe it was now? Had he moved in while I was out or was he going to leave again tomorrow?

There were so many things I didn't have a clear answer to.

"Can't sleep?" Remy asked as I stepped into the kitchen. He was stirring something in a pot on the stove. It smelled like meat and tomatoes. Maybe some sort of sauce?

"I just wanted to get a drink," I lied, getting a glass from the cupboard. "What are you making?"

Remy shrugged. "Honestly? I'm not even sure. I just needed something to do."

"You don't usually cook at midnight," I commented, but refrained from pointing out that we likely still had leftovers from dinner too so there was no need for him to prepare even more food.

He picked up a pepper shaker to season his sauce. "You may not be the only one who can't sleep."

I filled my glass with water from the fridge and sat at the kitchen island. "Are you going to be staying here now? I mean, long-term."