Page 16 of Lies That Blemish (The Ember War #3)

Aisling

The girls and Elaine were asleep, and Tetra and I were in the office going through papers. With only one box left, it was starting to feel really dismal. We both stared at it. The office looked like a tornado had ripped through it, papers and yellow file folders everywhere. Maps of Luksa and Imbria and different war strategies for hypothetical situations that had never happened were strewn all over the place. But nothing that proved my father paid anyone to try to kill me.

“I’m going in. This is it. Then we eat dessert and sleep,” Tetra announced, walking over to the box on her newly healed foot. I stopped her, forcing her to face me.

“How are you dealing with all that?” I pointed to her foot. She’d been acting so casually, almost like nothing happened.

She grinned. “How am I dealing with a lifelong, painful disability suddenly being gone? I’m doing amazing.”

I laughed at that. I didn’t know what I expected. More tears? Therapy?

Her face did betray some deeper emotion then. “I’ll never be able to fully thank Valor for what she did.”

I nodded. “I don’t think she quite understands how special she is.” She was too young to grasp something of this magnitude—only angry she wasn’t a warrior.

“I can’t believe that little booger who used to draw on our faces when we were asleep was the one to change my life so drastically.” She wiggled her foot again as if making sure the healing was real.

I smiled and found myself wondering if any of the cadets who came out of the Wilds would have a similar gift. What a world we could live in if we had a hundred more like my sister.

Tetra called me out for my procrastination: “You’re delaying opening the final box.”

I chuckled dryly. “On one hand, whatever is in that box means my own father tried to kill me. On the other, it means a man I loved so deeply lied to me from the very first kiss.”

Tetra nodded. “Let’s find out which it is. Together.”

Taking a steadying breath, I nodded, and we lifted the lid.

Right from the beginning, I knew this box was different. Inside was a metal box the same size as the cardboard, only slightly smaller to fit inside.

“Interesting. It’s a safe or something.” Tetra reached in and heaved it out, grunting as I pulled away the outer shell.

When it was on the floor, I noticed the front had a key lock.

“Dang, no key,” I growled.

Tetra rolled her eyes. “We are not letting that stop us. I’ll be right back.”

When she came back, she was holding a crowbar from the storage shed. I gave her an impressed look as she wedged it between the lock and the box.

“Don’t wake the girls. That’s the last thing I need right now.”

She grunted, moving left and right, until finally, with a crack that caused both of us to freeze, the lock busted open.

My pulse raced as Tetra removed the twisted lock and opened the metal lid. Safes were for keeping secrets. What secrets did my father want to hide in here? I wondered.

Tetra began to pull out files and maps and papers and we sat down, both a little more serious than before.

I peered at one map, confused by what I was seeing, until I realized it was a map of the old train station that ran under Emberlane Park. With it was a table of times. Circled were the busiest times when thousands would be on board coming from work in the city and going home out into the suburbs. The next was a paper showing the transformers that ran our city’s lighting system and the giant ember that fueled it.

“Aisling…” Tetra’s voice broke, and I peered up to see horror written on her expression. She handed me a stack of papers with a shaky fist, and I pulled them from her.

What in the world?

It was directions on how to make a homemade bomb.

Why would my dad have maps of the subway? And the lighting system, and how to make a bomb? My heart beat so wildly that dizziness washed over me. Then I found a piece of paper in my father’s handwriting.

We can call it the Great Blackout. Blame Imbria. Kill Badshah. Take over. Double our land.

I screamed, throwing the paper as I fell backward.

“What?” Tetra leaned forward, picking up the paper and reading it. As she did, I watched a mask of anger slide over her face.

“Aisling, if your dad killed thousands of his own people… that’s unforgivable.”

“I know.” I barely recognized my own voice. Kohen was right—he’d been right all along.

Her mask of anger softened. “I’m sorry.” She reached for me, but I pulled back. I felt dirty. I was a byproduct of him. His spawn. What if I turned evil, too? Maybe I already was. I’d killed the red rider in a sick way that I still couldn’t wipe from my mind.

Tetra grabbed the sides of my face and forced me to look at her. “I know what you’re thinking. You’re nothing like him.”

My bottom lip shook. “What if I am?” I asked.

Tetra shook her head. “You’re not. You and your sisters are not.”

There was a finality in her tone. She had spoken, and that was that.

She released me. “Ash, you know what this means, right?”

My hands shook. I was still processing everything.

“Kohen was right.” My voice felt foreign to my own ears. “I called his father a terrorist.” Tears leaked from my eyes. I couldn’t believe how much I’d cried the past few months. More than in my whole life.

I felt like I was unraveling.

“We all did,” Tetra said. “Because of this. Propaganda. We believed the papers, the investigation, our emperor.”

I swallowed hard. “How do I fix this? If I show people this to clear Kohen’s father’s name, they’ll think my family name is tainted. They’ll hang me.”

Tetra nodded. “I think you need to let the past be the past for now. But there is something you can fix, someone I think you owe an apology to. I think Kohen saved your life, Aisling. As painful as it was, in the way he did it…”

I nodded. The tears hadn’t stopped. I was questioning how anyone could have this much water in their body.

“I’ve said too many awful things to him. I’ve bombed half his country and burned most of it, too.” I shook my head. “He won’t forgive me.”

“Why don’t you let him say that or not?”

“I can’t face him. I’m ashamed of what my father did.” I hugged my arms. “I’m ashamed of how I acted.”

“You didn’t know. He should have found a way to prove this to you without killing your father.”

I shook my head. “I wouldn’t have listened. My father was my idol. I’m just now realizing that.”

“Go to Kohen. Tell him what you know and take it from there,” she said.

We stood, and I pulled her in for a hug and wiped at my cheeks, finally feeling the tears subside.

“I love you,” I told her.

“I love you, too.” I could hear the smile in her voice.

When I pulled back, she was beaming.

“What?” I asked.

She shrugged. “I like who you’ve become without your father. You’re a strong, self-assured woman.”

“Aww,” I joked and pinched her cheeks like a grandmother would. She rolled her eyes.

“I’ll wake you the second I get home,” I told her.

“You better!” she called out as I ran to the back door to see if Liana was still in the backyard.

‘Liana, I need you to contact Kohen.’

‘I already have. I told him you want to meet. He said to come to him. I know where they are. Some village in Imbria.’

Imbria? That was dangerous for me. His people would likely kill me if they saw me.

‘He said he’s alone but for one other. You will be safe. He promised.’

Was he expecting me? Did he know I was coming to apologize?

Nerves ate at my stomach as I walked outside, my mind still spinning with the fact that my father was responsible for the murder of thousands of Amerseans. And worse, he’d pinned it on someone else in order to take over their country.

Kohen’s dad was killed because of a lie. Kohen lost his right to the crown and the nice life he and his brothers should have had because of my father.

Lies. Lies. Lies. That’s all I’d been sold my entire life.

‘You’re smoking,’ Liana said.

I looked down at the skin of my arms, and sure enough, she was right. I felt like I would explode with rage. Had my father been alive right now, I would have killed him myself.

All those families. Remembrance Day. The war on Imbria. The lengths to which my father went to, for what? Double the ember and some extra land. It wasn’t worth the cost of even one life.

I was flitting in and out from rage to sorrow. When I reached Liana, she nuzzled me, and I stroked her neck.

‘I can’t believe it. I’m in shock,’ was all I said as I hopped up onto her back and settled into the saddle.

‘I can,’ she stated brutally and kicked off the ground.

That hurt. The fact that she knew my father was capable of something like this and I was too brainwashed to have even considered it made me feel raw.

‘I’m sorry,’ she amended. ‘If you could see energy like I do, you would understand.’

‘And Kohen’s energy is good?’

‘Yes,’ she stated simply.

‘And my father’s was bad?’

‘Yes. But nothing near as evil as Maxim’s.’

That sent a chill up my spine. I felt like my entire life that I’d lived with a monster, and everyone saw it but me.

We flew in silence for a long time; me, stuck in my thoughts. I replayed every time my father gave a speech on Remembrance Day to the victims’ families. How he used the attack that he created to control our people and take more land that wasn’t his. I cried. I nearly threw up. I screamed. All the while, Liana just flew in quiet companionship.

I thought of all the times Kohen tried to convince me of the truth, from day one in the Wilds when I’d said those awful things about his father. Even Anika knew. All the times Kohen had said he would protect me no matter what. That he would even lie to protect me.

He’d done exactly that. Deep shame washed over me as we flew over Imbria. The fires had mostly been put out since we had called a temporary peace, but the damage was done. Trees and villages burned. For what?

A lie .

A lie that burned its way through an entire country.

I could never fix this. This was unforgivable.

‘We’re close,’ Liana told me.

‘I don’t know if I can face him,’ I told her, wondering if we should turn back. This was too big a thing to apologize for. Kohen and I felt like we were on opposite sides of a deep cavern. What would I even say to him?

I’m sorry my dad pinned the murder of thousands of people on your father and killed him and then took over your country and enslaved your brothers into poverty. Meanwhile, I defended him the entire time, and then he tried to kill me, and you took care of the problem, and I burned your country for it.

No. No. I couldn’t.

‘Liana, turn back.’ Tears fell down my cheeks as the wind whipped past and carried them away.

‘We’re here, little one. I think this will help you heal. To see him.’

No, this would gut me. But maybe I needed that. Maybe I should let Kohen ream me out for everything and get it off his chest. It would make him feel better. That, I could give him. That was the only thing I could give him. A humble apology. A, ‘you were right’ .

Liana landed over a small half-burned village, still smoking from the recently-put-out fires.

Kohen was there, leaning up against a brick wall, speaking to an older man in a ceremonial dress. A priest? Probably there to bury the dead that I burned.

When Liana landed, the priest nodded to Kohen and then left down a dark alley.

I swallowed hard, no longer caring if this was a trap. If Kohen had lured me here to ambush me and kill me.

I felt like I could barely breathe under the shame of this guilt I carried. Without meeting his gaze, I slipped off Liana, head down as I wiped my cheeks and walked over to him. When his shoes came into view, I dropped to my knees before him, head bowed, tears falling from my cheeks onto his dusty black boots.

“You were right,” I managed to croak out. “Your father didn’t cause the Great Blackout. Mine did. I know what I’ve done is unforgivable, but I want you to know I will live with the mistake of giving my father blind loyalty for the rest of my life. I’m sorry.”

Silence. He said nothing.

He could take my head right now, and I would deserve it. He could knee me in the face and walk away and bomb our country for ten nights straight, and I would do nothing.

But he didn’t.

He crouched down, grasping my face with the sides of his hands, and forced me to look up at him.

Why the hell was he smiling?

He registered the alarm on my face and laughed.

“You’re laughing?” Had he gone insane? Had I driven him to insanity?

He glanced at my lips and back into my eyes.

“I had two visions this morning of this moment. In one, you kneel before me pretending to apologize, and then slit my throat, saying you found no evidence of wrongdoing on your father.”

I gasped.

“In the other, you kneel and actually apologize. I wasn’t sure which I was going to get. I love you, Aisling, but you never would have believed me, or Anika, or anyone, if we told you that your father planted the terrorist attack on my father to gain ember and land. You had to find out yourself.”

He stood, pulling me up with him, and I was so shocked at how normal he was being that I couldn’t speak.

“I love you,” he said again, running his finger over my lips. “I forgive you.”

Tears spilled out from my eyes, running down my face. Who had I become to cry this much? What was wrong with me?

I shook my head. “I don’t deserve it.”

“Yes, you do,” he whispered against my mouth, leaning forward to crush my lips in a passionate kiss. I whimpered as the familiar taste of Kohen splashed across my tongue. Walking forward until his back hit the wall, I boxed him in, pressing my entire body against his. Our tongues stroked each other as I ate up the affection I’d felt starved for these last few months without him. I breathed him in, moaning against his mouth as heat built in my core.

All I could feel right now was pure gratitude that he accepted my apology.

When we both pulled away, we were breathless, grinning. Somehow, the war, the lies, the betrayal, it had faded away, and I was just in a love bubble with Kohen—the only thing that seemed real.

“Marry me,” he said suddenly, and it felt like the rug was pulled out from under me.

I laughed softly. “Kohen… I’m engaged to Alek.” I held up my left hand to show the ring.

Reaching out, he pulled the ring off my finger and tucked it into my pocket. Then he pulled something shiny from his and dropped to his knee.

I gasped.

Taking my hand, he held a gorgeous ring before me. It was a pink sapphire surrounded by small green emeralds in a yellow-gold band.

“This was my mother’s. I’ve dreamed of giving it to you since you first kissed me at graduation. I’ve seen us married, Aisling. Our love saves Amersea and Imbria from total annihilation at Luska’s hands.”

I shook my head, tears building back in my eyes. “My people would never allow it, Kohen. They will disown me, my sisters. They aren’t ready for this.”

“Are you?” he asked.

My heart ached at the question.

“If your people were not in the equation. Would you? Tonight? Marry me?”

Tonight? My mouth popped open. “The priest?” I asked, indicating the man he’d been speaking to earlier.

Kohen grinned. “He’s waiting to wed us, if you say yes. So I will ask you one more time. Aisling Everhart, will you be my wife?”

I did something selfish then, without consulting my advisors and without thinking of my sisters or my country. I did something for myself.

“Yes,” I breathed.

His grin grew wider as he slipped the ring onto my finger. Then he stood, placing another kiss on my lips. I’d never felt so complete as when Kohen’s lips were on mine. “Stars, I missed you, Aisling,” he breathed against my mouth, and I whimpered.

I’d missed him too—I’d missed us . I’d prayed that our love wasn’t fake. Something in my heart healed at that moment. Sometimes, our parents disappointed us. My mother died, not her fault, but it had left me looking for attention and approval from the only remaining parent I had left. Which meant I’d glanced past all of my father’s faults until, in the end, he let me down, too. Now Kohen filled those gaps. Healed the wounds that an absent narcissist had inflicted. I didn’t know if I could ever truly show him how much that meant to me, but if binding myself to him in marriage now meant that I could spend the rest of my life feeling this way, feeling healed and loved and good enough, then I was saying yes and never looking back.

Kohen pulled my hand, guiding me down the small dark alley the priest had disappeared into, and when we came out the other side, I grinned.

The small outdoor patio was still standing, beauty among the ashes of a fallen place. An arch trellis was set up with purple flowers unmarred by the fires. And underneath stood a priest, beaming at us both.

I approached him cautiously. I was the reason for so much wrong in his country. He must hate me. But when we got near, he bowed to me deeply. “Empress.”

“Thank you for doing this, Sai.” Kohen embraced the man.

“It is my honor, my king.”

My king . Somehow, in all of this, I’d forgotten Kohen was a king now.

How did a king and an empress come together as one?

I was about to find out because I didn’t care about the repercussions of this wedding anymore. I wanted it for me, even if my people tried to take it from me.

The priest began by singing the most beautiful song in a deep timbre in Imbrian. He belted to the sky, and I peered over at Kohen to find him staring at me with absolute adoration.

What did I do to deserve this kind of love?

Growing up under the harsh fist of my father, I never imagined any type of love. Jace was puppy love compared to this. Kohen was the other half of my soul.

The priest asked if we wanted to say anything to each other first, and Kohen reached up and stroked my cheek.

“Aisling, from this moment forward, I promise to love you with all that I am, to stand by your side through every high and low. I vow to cherish and respect you and hold you close in the hardest moments. I vow to lead our countries together as one and teach our children to do the same. But most of all, I vow to protect you, no matter what, forever and always.”

Our countries as one. He wanted to join with Amersea again? Tears filled my eyes. Our children. My protection. It was so romantic, and my heart felt so full. I hadn’t prepared for this. I had nothing planned, so I just spoke from my heart.

“Kohen, I never could have dreamed up a love like this. I promise you I am going to make mistakes.”

He smiled.

“But I vow to always right my wrongs and respect your opinion, even though mine is probably better.”

Both the priest and Kohen laughed.

“To lead our countries as one and to always come home to you. I love you.”

The priest placed his hands over mine and Kohen’s, joining them together. “It is my great pleasure to pronounce you husband and wife.” He squeezed our hands and then bowed to us both before walking away.

“That was it?” I asked. “We’re married?”

“According to Imbrian law. A priest has heard our love declared and sealed our bond. Now, he will write the declaration down and file it away in the hall of records. It’s official, Aisling. You are my wife.”

Official . I was officially Kohen’s wife!

“Oh my stars, I’m married,” I said, almost unable to believe it.

“Yes, wife, you are,” he grinned.

I moaned, “Say it again.” My heart ached to hear it a thousand times.

He grinned. “Wife.” Leaning forward, he captured my mouth into a kiss and then pulled back, peering down at me. “Stay one night with me,” he begged, “then we can figure all the hard stuff out in the morning.”

I looked around at the half-burned-out building and then off to the side where a big white silk tent had been erected. I assumed that’s where he meant for us to stay.

“Okay,” I told him.

‘I’ll fly around the perimeter with Onyx,’ Liana told me. I’d forgotten she was here somewhere.

‘Thank you.’

‘I’m happy for you, Aisling. No one should dictate who you love and marry, least of all duty.’

She was right. It was my life, my forever, and I wasn’t going to spend it with anyone less than Kohen. My husband .

He led me over to the tent and unzipped it. I peered in and smiled. A thick bed with luscious blankets had been set up inside. We were in the middle of nowhere, and it couldn’t be more perfect. The tent was large, over eight feet tall, so I could step in and not have to crouch. In the corner was a metal portable fireplace with logs already burning behind glass.

“This is really nice,” I told him.

“Thanks. It’s what our traders use when traveling long distances between villages. They pack everything on their mules or horses and live on the road.”

I knew cars were a rarity in Imbria. They preferred the older modes of travel, like horseback.

I went to the corner, where a little washbasin sat with fresh water inside. The little rug at the end of the bed was a nice touch. It was homey, and for moment, I wanted to stay here forever with Kohen, never going back to reality and duty. Live in this tent, catch fish and deer, and cook on the fire stove. It would be a simple life. A nice life.

I peered down at the stunning ring on my hand. His mother’s. When I looked up, I found him watching me.

“Your people will never forgive me.” I shook my head. “And mine will never forgive you.”

He walked across the room like a lion, long strides, eyes never leaving mine.

“And yet they do,” he stated, leaning forward to kiss my collarbone, sending chills down my spine.

“You’ve seen it?” I asked.

He nodded, kissing a line across my neck and causing my knees to go weak.

“How? What do we do to convince them?”

He pulled back and met my gaze. “I have no idea. I try not to worry about the things I can’t control.”

His statement caused a giant weight to lift from my shoulders. Trying not to worry about things I couldn’t control was something I’d never done before…

What if I tried that? At least for tonight?

Stepping forward, I took Kohen’s face in my hands and kissed him hungrily. I kissed him how I’d always wanted to, without restraint, without care for who saw, who heard, who knew. He growled, and I pushed him onto the bed, falling on top of him.

“Kohen Badshah?” I sucked his bottom lip.

“Yes, Empress?” He panted into my ear.

“Show me one of the perks of being your wife,” I taunted.

He smiled against my mouth and then grabbed my hips. One second, I was on top of him, and the next, he yanked me off, tossing me to the side, and then hovered over me. I laughed, but then, as I looked up, I gasped.

Stars . The ceiling of the tent was cut out and replaced with mesh netting, so I was looking up at the beautiful night sky. As Kohen slowly undressed me and we made love, I realized another one of his predictions had come true. We made love under a bed of stars, and I did indeed cry out his name.