Page 2

I barely heard the doors buzz open over the roaring thunder of stormy gray skies and heavy downpour until someone stepped out of the apartment building in a shiny pink raincoat and matching bubble umbrella raised over her head, a stark contrast to the gloomy backdrop.

She spotted me first, pressed into a corner of the building with my bag held over my head, even though it did a poor job of keeping the rain from drenching me completely.

“Elena?” It was Jackie, a beach surfer with perfect strawberry-blonde hair from four doors away and, I might add, a neighbor with whom I was not always pleased. “Whatever are you doing over there?”

If today were any other ordinary day, I might have stolen a few seconds to envy her flawless tanned skin and size six sculpted body, but the rain seeping through my hair and into my clothes won’t allow me.

“Oh, you know, just taking a quick bath, or maybe I ignored the forecasts today and left my umbrella behind before rushing off to work,” I bit out through a flashed smile while hurriedly marching up the steps toward the doors. “See you later, Jackie.”

Or not.

The doors closed behind me, shutting off the sound of the torrent, and I breathed out, flooded with the relief of being enveloped with the warmth of the lobby and grateful that I didn’t stick around long enough to watch Jackie possibly offer me a towel to dry off.

Wiping off the water from my face, I started the climb up the stairs to my apartment. The elevators were working, but I took the long way up when I needed to clear my head.

So, back to the neighbor from four doors away.

Jackie was surprisingly nice and all, but a glimpse at her reminded me of all the things I did not have. The apartments here weren’t exactly rundown. They were decent, comfortable, and well-managed. But she didn’t reside here because this was the only place she could afford, like me.

Once, I got a proper peek into her apartment.

She lived like a queen. If Jackie wished, she could snap her fingers and vacate from these downtown LA neighborhoods to cruise with those uppity Californian posh surfers in a blink.

I knew it. One time, I overheard her argue about her poor choices with her Malibu Ken boyfriend from down the hall.

I sneezed and the shock left a rise of goosebumps in its wake. The cold was settling in, and while I climbed the last flight of stairs, I shivered.

Forget Jackie the surfer. The closer I got to my door, the more real my life felt, and it didn’t matter how many times I wished for a tiny taste of the luxury she enjoyed—being able to afford anything at any moment, living freely without the weight of the world hanging on your shoulders.

If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

My chunky court heels left a faint trail of wetness on the coffee-brown, rugged hallway as I approached the door with peeling off-white paint.

308.

Exhaling, I fished my keys from my bag, slotted them into the keyhole, and opened the door to the aroma of chocolate, cakes, and coffee.

Home sweet home.

Another sneeze, more violent than the last one, ripped from my throat, and I thought I felt the walls tremble, but it was only the heavy footsteps of my brother charging toward me from the kitchen.

“Lee!”

Only Jasper called me that. It wasn’t the most obvious deviation from Elena , but it worked well enough.

“Hey, buddy!”

He flew into my arms, covered in flour and smelling of oil and sugar.

I kicked off my shoes by the pot with the rubber plant and hugged him to my side.

These days, I’d forgotten he was a thirteen-year-old teenager now.

It felt like just yesterday when I helped our mother change his diapers and heat his milk bottles.

Now, the crown of his head stood taller than my chin. I wouldn’t say I was tall enough— like five foot eleven Jackie— but I was a solid five nine, and in my opinion, it was too soon for Jasper to be at the same height as me.

“I’m pretty soaked right now. I don’t think hugging me is a good idea.”

“I’m literally covered in butter, but you don’t mind.” He smiled up at me, and I ruffled his hair.

“What were you baking?”

“A cake, a few muffins, and scones. I thought we could have them with hot chocolate for dinner.”

“Sounds yummy already. You have to show me that secret recipe you’ve been working on.”

“Maybe I will, maybe I won’t. Here, let me help you with your bag. I’ll empty it and hang it out to dry later.”

I smiled, handing him the bag. “Thank you.”

Aside from my brother, I didn’t think I had ever met a more caring young man or anyone more passionate about getting messy with flour and baking tools.

“How was school?”

“Good. I think I’m finding Ms. Marie’s Spanish class a lot easier now,” he said, walking ahead of me. “And work? Have any fun today?”

“I doubt there’ll ever be anything fun about being a marketing executive, with all the planning, executing, and, my least favorite part, the talking,” I mumbled, stripping off my blazer. “But I can’t complain. My boss was pleased today.”

“I like hearing that.” Then, he paused in his steps and turned around with a solemn look that made him appear more mature than his age. “Lee….”

Under the light, the scattered freckles on his cheeks were more pronounced, and the green in his eyes appeared a lot darker than usual. In that fleeting moment, his resemblance to our mother was uncanny.

“What’s wrong? What’s that look for?”

Jasper tried to muster a smile, but it wasn’t convincing. “Our lives will get easier. I hope you know that.”

My heart melted into a batter of love and the sadness that I’d been fighting off from the second I arrived at the apartment building. Moving closer to him, I cradled his cheeks while salty tears stung the back of my eyes.

A wave of emotions threatened to suffocate me, but I fought back the tears, sniffling.

When I didn’t think it was possible for my brother to love me any more than he already did, he sprang up to prove me wrong over and over again.

And the love I had for him was fiercer and more protective.

That was what moved me to tears, knowing I would do whatever it took to shield him from experiencing even half of the burdens I carried.

“Jaz, I don’t want you worrying about anything, okay? Just focus on school and being happy.”

“I know.” He covered my hand with his, and the smile on his face wobbled.

“But I think about Mom, too, and I think about how you try to handle both her and us at the same time. I know it’s not been easy,” he said with a chuckle.

“And I know you don’t really like your job, but you have to pull through every day to keep us afloat.

But Lee, our lives will get easier someday soon. I just want you to believe that.”

The tears I fought so hard to suppress began to stream down my cheeks, and I stopped trying to hold them back. Chuckling through my tears, I kissed his cheeks.

“How are you only thirteen years old?”

“Beats me sometimes.” He laughed and wiped the tears from my eyes. “I think I get all that wisdom from spending so much time with Nana.”

She hated it when we called her Granny, and said it made her feel older than sixty-five.

Then, she would brag about how big of a star she was back in the day, a star who could do almost everything: bake the best pastries, cook the most delicious meals, sing, act, model, paint, and perform a bunch of other hard-to-believe arts. The Rita Richard.

“Speaking of which, where is she? I thought she would be home by now.”

Jasper resumed his walk to one of the two bedrooms to spread my handbag. “I’m guessing the rain held her up,” he shouted from his room. “She’s still at the hospital. I tried calling her an hour ago, but there’s been poor service.”

My chest did a little dip, sinking deeper when I remembered that, in addition to Nana’s already sparkling resume, she had to include being an excellent caretaker of her severely ill daughter, who needed a liver transplant within two months.

For two years now, after Mom fell sick, Nana looked over her and Jasper without complaints while I worked to the bone to provide for our financial needs.

Jasper intentionally learned to lighten the load and was able to start attending school and returning without a twenty-four-seven chaperone.

He developed an interest in cooking and somehow forced Nana to teach him while I was away, so when she was at the hospital, none of us would starve.

“But if you ask me, I don’t think Nana will want us to wait up,” Jaz continued. “You know how stubborn she can be. She won’t want to leave Mom’s side.”

“Did she at least take some food?”

“Yup. Veggies, rice, and a few muffins I managed to get done before she left.”

I nodded but didn’t find the strength to say anymore before going into my room to shed off the remaining wet clothes and take a shower. Thankfully, the hot water was working.

While in the shower, I finally allowed the weights on my shoulders to collapse, and I bawled my eyes out as my heart squeezed uncomfortably with frustration and an anguish so deep it felt like it suffocated my entire existence.

It didn’t matter how hard I worked; finding a liver donor and raising the money for the operation were more challenging than I expected.

These were the moments when I wished I weren’t handling it all alone. I knew Jasper tried his best to help, but being the older one, I was always inclined to shield him from the pressure.

I missed our dad. Shortly after Jasper was born, he passed away.

I knew, if he were still here, I’d have more support—more options.

But he wasn’t, and over the years, I grew accustomed to it.

I shared more memories with him than our brother ever had the chance to, and I held onto every one of those memories as if they were priceless treasures.

The shower squeaked when I turned it off, and I grabbed the towel to dry off before stepping out.