Page 5

Banks: You good? You haven’t been to the club in a few days.

Beau: Yeah. I’ll be by later. Something came up.

Banks: All right. Just checking in. See you later.

After a day of sitting still, quietly showing Beau all his toys, Kylo had looked a hell of a lot better. Beau had felt okay about leaving him alone again. The guilt set in almost immediately. Except Beau wasn’t so sure it was guilt he experienced. It felt a hell of a lot like he missed Kylo. He needed space to think.

The PlayPen seemed extra busy. Beau sat with his boys. He wanted to be content with that. As he had told Kylo, they were the only good thing he had ever done. Sometimes, he thought he should be proud of the great men he had created, despite his every fuck-up, and walk away. Maybe that was the best way he could show his love. Plus, The PlayPen was just an uncomfortable place for him, and Beau wasn’t uncomfortable anywhere. The world bent to him. Not the other way around. Unfortunately, too many people here had seen him weak. His ex was here with his new husband. His only family sat nearby, enjoying their spouses. Beau had never fit. He was the black sheep of the family he created. For years, he had forced dinners with just the boys at their favorite restaurant for a guys' night... and an excuse to be free from the drama at home. He had demanded they come to the house so they could see Tabitha. Beau had pushed, tugged, pulled, and he was fucking tired. He didn’t know how to fix this and sometimes he wondered if he should. Maybe they were better off apart. They would never forgive him for all his sins. In his growing anger and frustration, a thought hit. He had never apologized. There were a lot of things he didn’t feel bad about. There were even more things he still didn’t think he was in the wrong about. But no matter what the world thought of him, Beau loved his kids.

“I’m sorry.”

Boone and Banks both stiffened. Their heads turned away from their husbands to focus on him.

Beau couldn’t stop now. “It occurs to me I haven’t actually said that to you two. You’re my sons. I love you both more than anything and I don’t know how—”

“Please don’t.” Beau’s teeth snapped together at Boone’s angry-sounding interruption. Banks and Boone looked completely closed to him. Boone didn’t stop there. “We’re trying with you, Dad, but we are not a family who talks things out. That’s not a conversation that’ll go well for you, so let’s just not.”

Beau’s jaw popped from holding back his temper. The pair looked ready to throw hands rather than speak. They were right. He wasn’t a good person. Beau was the bad guy in everyone’s story. There would be no redemption arch for him. He had brought them into this world, provided for them, giving them damn good lives. Beau had done his job. They didn’t need him anymore.

The pair went back to watching their husbands. Beau counted slowly to sixty in his head. He wanted a good minute to pass before he excused himself from their lives. That was the apology they deserved. They didn’t want to hear about the nightmare of losing their mom to drugs and alcohol decades before she actually died. They didn’t want to know what it was like to watch the love of his life turn into someone else and what it was like to live twenty-four hours a day with a raging addict. His bitterness had driven him down a lot of dark roads. He regretted a few of them, but he would never regret being their father. Even if he was done.

Beau opened his mouth to say a quick goodbye. A movement nearby caught his eye. Kylo stood at the mouth of the entrance, looking unsure. He wore teddy bear pajamas with a hot pink tutu. It took Beau a second to realize he wore a huge grin at just the sight of Kylo. Kylo’s gaze landed on him. His expression cleared, as if he spotted exactly what he searched for. Every dark thought disappeared as Kylo headed his way. In fact, everything vanished except the adorable man Beau couldn’t see anything else from. He wasn’t bad in Kylo’s eyes. Beau desperately needed him.

Without a single second of hesitation, Beau scooted back his chair and pulled Kylo into his lap as Kylo reached his side. “Hi, baby.”

“Hi, Daddy. I hope it’s okay for me to be here.” He bit his bottom lip, looking guilty. “I don’t want to cut into time with your sons.”

He was so goddamn happy to see Kylo. “You’re not. I’m glad you’re here.”

Kylo’s light blue gaze stayed locked on him, and Beau couldn’t look away. He swore he felt Boone’s and Banks’ stares, but Kylo held him captive with his pure heart. “I didn’t know if you’d be here, but I also hated to show up at your door announced. But then I remembered the free passes this guy gave me and I hoped—” His gaze moved toward the boys. “Oh, hey. Hi.” He waved at Banks. “That’s who gave me the passes. Well, his husband did.”

Banks smiled and dipped his chin. “Hello again.”

Beau cleared his throat. He hadn’t wanted anyone to know Kylo. Beau could never be ashamed of him. He just didn’t want Kylo tainted by his world. It was too late now. “That’s my son, Banks. He owns the place.” He motioned toward Boone. “My other son, Boone.” He stroked Kylo’s back. “This is Kylo.”

They dipped their chins in greeting.

Kylo being Kylo, he never dimmed. “You both look very much like your dad.” His gaze moved back to Beau. “I see why you’re so proud. They look every bit as amazing as you described.” Beau’s throat swelled. A huge realization overwhelmed him. He wanted a relationship with his kids, but they didn’t want him. Kylo did, and Beau was stupid for holding himself back. Tabitha was gone. He had lost all the battles with everyone in his life a long time ago. It was okay to look toward the future. Kylo was completely oblivious to Beau’s inner battles or his surrender. “I brought coloring books in case you weren’t here.” He blushed. “I accidentally left them in the car. It would’ve been kind of awkward if you hadn’t been here. I’m not so sure I really fit in.”

Beau brought Kylo’s hand to his lips and kissed it. “Me either. Would you like to see my home instead?”

Kylo’s smile was everything. “Of course.” He slipped from Beau’s lap, but Beau didn’t release his hand. Without looking back, he headed for the door with Kylo at his side.

“Don’t you need to say bye to your boys?”

“We’ve said our goodbyes.” Now it was time to stop forcing them to endure his company. Beau wanted to be where he was wanted for once.

With Beau’s assurance his car would be fine in The PlayPen parking garage, Kylo rode with him. He was a little nervous today. It had taken all his courage to seek out Beau. Then Beau’s sons had been there. Kylo wasn’t so sure that first meeting had gone well. The pair had looked at him, totally horrified. That couldn’t be good. Now they were headed through a massive iron gate into what could only be described as a compound, and Kylo felt very small. Guards were posted everywhere. It was uncomfortable. There was no hiding from Beau’s wealth and power here, or his crimes.

Kylo couldn’t say why he was so unbothered by the danger he was probably in. Likely, it was simply years of friendship with Reggie. Since that had nearly gotten him killed, Kylo should be running for his life right now. But Beau looked at him in a way Reggie never had and Kylo was too fucking intrigued to back down. He had always been dumb like that.

They didn’t speak. Beau kept him tucked against his side and kissed his hand several times. Kylo lived inside his own mind, trying to decipher every move Beau made. He felt the way Beau’s guards meticulously kept their eyes averted, as if they fought against years of training attempting not to stare. He wondered what it was about the situation that left them fascinated. Kylo tended to overthink, though. Likely, Beau had hundreds of men and women he treated the way he did Kylo. Kylo wasn’t special. That much he knew.

After parking in a line of expensive cars, guards poured out. The door opened for them and Beau helped him out. It was sweet. Kylo felt treasured when he was with Beau. He could easily get addicted. That was his biggest fault, really. He got attached to people who didn’t feel the same.

Kylo fought to tear his gaze away from Beau to inspect his surroundings. The house was a bit cold, truthfully. It was filled with priceless antiques and artwork. Beau was so much better than a cold museum of a home. Kylo was no stranger to wealth. Beau was so much more interesting than all that.

“I know it’s a lot.” Beau laughed and looked his way, catching him staring. His smile slipped away. Heat filled his eyes. “You’re not one to care about any of this, I know.”

Kylo tried to pretend interest in his surroundings. “If you have something you’re especially proud for me to see, let me know. Otherwise, I’m just here to be with you.” Kylo wouldn’t play games. He had done that in the past and it cost him years of his life, getting therapy. From now on, he vowed to be straightforward and honest about his wants. It saved time for everyone involved.

“What does it say about me that I’m not proud of any of this?”

“I don’t know. Maybe that you’re human and therefore subject to human flaws.”

Beau’s dark gaze moved over Kylo’s face. They stood in the middle of what Kylo assumed was the living room. It was like they couldn’t see anything except each other. “You fascinate the fuck out of me.”

Beau’s softly spoken confession nearly took out Kylo’s knees. “Same.”

Beau took a step back and glanced around.

Disappointment flooded Kylo’s veins. It seemed games were being played after all. Guards stood everywhere, playing witness to his constant rejection.

Beau took his hand and started walking.

Kylo let him drag him through the house. He was too curious about Beau’s sudden burst of energy to pull away. Finally, he dipped inside a darkened room. Beau closed the door behind them and Kylo’s back hit the inside of the wood that separated them from the rest of the world. Beau’s mouth covered his. The zipper on his pajamas slid down and Beau’s hands were inside. Kylo tore at Beau’s buttons. Fucking suit. There were so many. He lost his patience and went for the pants instead. A moan vibrated around his tongue as his fingers encircled Beau’s erection. His feet left the floor. One second, he was against the door. The next, Kylo was on a bed with Beau on top of him. He kept his weight balanced, taking care not to hurt Kylo’s wound, even through his lust. Kylo found that sexy as hell. A man who cared for him was definitely his kink.

Beau sat back on his heels and peeled off his jacket. Then he went to work on the shirt. It was dark as hell and Kylo resented the inability to see anything except the bare minimum. He knew Beau’s body would be amazing. Everything about him was. A flutter ran through Kylo. It felt so damn good to be wanted.

“I have a feeling I’m missing one hell of a show.”

Beau’s weight disappeared, stealing his ability to even see his outline. He listened to him moving around. The sound of a belt hitting a wooden floor made Kylo shiver with anticipation. He didn’t need to see. His other senses took over.

A bedside lamp fired to life, casting a soft glow. It was obviously a dimming light set to only give off a nightlight level of illumination. It was enough. Beau was nude and digging through the nightstand. Kylo swallowed a moan. Holy hell. He definitely took care of himself. No doubt he couldn’t be soft in his profession, but wow. Kylo wanted to touch him.

Beau’s gaze swung his way.

Kylo’s mind went blank. He had never seen so much dark hunger and it was focused on him. In his heart, Kylo knew he wouldn’t walk away the same after Beau.

A condom and lube landed on the bed. Kylo never looked away from Beau as Beau crawled onto the mattress. Kylo let Beau treat him like a doll, methodically undressing him. His hungry gaze never wavered from Kylo. Kylo’s eyes burned from him not wanting to blink. He needed to record this memory in his mind clip by clip for playback. It was the sexiest moment of his life. Kylo wanted to hang on to it.

Beau peeled the pajamas and tutu from Kylo and froze. His gaze lifted to hold Kylo’s stare. “Did you anticipate ending up in my bed tonight?”

“No.” He knew why he asked, though. Kylo wore lacy underwear. He always did.

“Did you plan to try?”

Kylo never broke eye contact. “No.” He needed Beau to accept him exactly as he was.

Beau dragged his fingers down Kylo’s erection, covered in lace. His gaze followed the motion.

Kylo fought a loud gasp. It felt so fucking amazing to be touched.

“Everything about you is perfect for me.” Beau’s dark eyes met his gaze. The light danced on the surface of a stare that looked black in the darkness—the devil’s eyes. “I want you to belong to me.”

Even in the heat of the moment, it felt like an odd thing to say. It was how Beau stated it—like he wanted to actually own Kylo.

Kylo licked his lips, feeling oddly nervous. An awkward chuckle escaped him. “Was that your way of asking me to be your boyfriend?”

“No.” His immediate denial nearly sent Kylo scrambling from the bed. He didn’t want to be used anymore. Beau immediately froze him in place. “I’m telling you—if you let me touch you like this—you’re mine. No one else will ever see you like this again.”

He was a goddamn fool because that didn’t scare him at all. “Everything about you is perfect for me too.”

For a moment, Beau held his stare. Then his underwear was literally ripped away. The fragile lace easily gave way beneath Beau’s tug. A gasp fell from his lips and Beau caught it on his tongue. His kiss turned rough to the point of almost violent. Kylo held on and prayed for more. Beau was harsh, yet somehow gentle. He took what he wanted, but it didn’t hurt Kylo. His talented kiss kept Kylo distracted as his skilled fingers found his asshole. Wet digits probed and stretched.

Kylo couldn’t take it anymore. He had been neglected and rejected for too long. With a firm push, he had Beau on his back. Beau gasped as Kylo took what he wanted and sat on Beau’s dick. He froze and took a moment to adjust to the intrusion. Beau’s head lifted. His mouth touched Kylo’s neck. That was all the encouragement Kylo needed. He used Beau.

“Damn, baby boy. I’m an old man. You’re going to kill me. Fuck. Don’t stop.”

The deep, guttural way Beau said “fuck” nearly made Kylo blow right then. Kylo owned him at that moment. Maybe Beau was deadly and terrifying, but he belonged to Kylo. Kylo took his pleasure and gave it. He put his whole heart into ensuring Beau couldn’t look back on any second of their encounter without getting hard.

His side burned, reminding him of his injury.

As if Beau read his mind, Kylo found himself beneath him. He held Kylo and rocked inside him at the perfect angle to protect his wound while ensuring maximum pleasure. Kylo had known he would be talented. Age almost always brought skill.

“Daddy.” Kylo heard the pleading in his voice. He didn’t care how desperate he sounded. Beau had him on the edge, and Kylo was ready to tear at his skin. He was on the precipice of crying. That was how badly he wanted to blow.

“Daddy has you.” Beau stroked Kylo’s cock, sending him flying.

A loud cry tore from Kylo, assaulting his ears. Kylo couldn’t stop. His hips lifted, leaning into the powerful orgasm.

“Fuck.”

The sexy, deep “fuck” took him all the way out this time. Rhythmic whimpers wouldn’t stop leaving his lips.

Beau released a loud moan that almost sent Kylo straight into another orgasm. He was real life porn. Beau was a whole-ass show as he came. Kylo simply held on and watched as Beau went through the stages of coming. His face somehow hardened even more than when he had told Kylo he belonged to him. He made sounds that were straight-up hot. Finally, his muscles relaxed. His expression softened, and he held Kylo’s stare as he lowered his head. Kylo’s throat swelled as the sweetest kiss he ever experienced swiped his lips. If this wasn’t real, Kylo wouldn’t make it. He had waited and ached for exactly this for too long. Kylo needed someone to love him. Otherwise, he would wither away.