Page 43 of Just My Type (The Boston Hearts #3)
I consider his question, realizing the line I’m walking here.
I just meant to help Cooper by blurting out my feelings for Hannah, but now that it’s out there, I realize how much I need to talk to my brothers and my dad.
How hard it’s been to keep some of this to myself.
But I also don’t want to divulge anything Hannah told me in confidence.
This is her story too, and I promised I would keep her secrets safe.
I would die before I broke that promise.
“I do. I think she’s always been mine. Spending these last couple of months with her has been…
god, it’s just been the best time of my entire life.
She’s everything to me. My whole damn world, just like El said.
You guys understand.” I glance at Elliot an d Jordan and they both nod, smiles on their faces, and I know they’re thinking about Amelia and Jo.
“So why are you not grinning your face off right now?” my dad asks.
“I am. Mostly. It’s just…” I run a hand down my face and drain my beer bottle, thinking about Hannah’s text messages earlier, the alcohol lowering her filter enough to give me a glimpse at the core of her.
How she really feels. “I think I’m moving faster than she is.
No, I know I am. I want to go at her pace, and I would never push her for more than she’s willing to give me, but it’s hard.
I said I think I’m in love with her, but that’s a lie.
I know I am. I love her. I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.
I can see it all so clearly. Our entire future.
It’s hard to not want to start that future this minute when I see exactly how it could be. ”
My dad smiles at me. It’s a nostalgic sort of smile.
The one parents get when they’re looking at you now, but you know that they’re seeing a younger version of you.
“You always were the most impatient of all my boys. When you were a little kid, your mom and I used to wait until the very last second to tell you about pretty much anything we had planned because your brain could never grasp that we couldn’t make things happen sooner, just because you wanted them to. ”
“So, what you’re saying is, Noah never grew up.” Cooper’s smile is wicked, and I stick my tongue out at him, all mature-like and shit.
My dad chuckles and looks at me. “You definitely grew up, but at your core, you’re still the excited kid who wondered why Christmas couldn’t be right now, instead of two weeks from now.
It’s not a bad thing, Noah. You’ve always been our sunshine guy, collecting goodness wherever you could find it.
But sometimes, goodness is worth waiting for.
It’s worth your patience and care. Your time and your attention. ”
“I know,” I say quietly. Thoughtfully. “Hannah…she’s been through some things.
Things that make it hard for her to trust th at this is real.
” It’s the most I’ll say, but I think it’s enough.
“I don’t want to rush her or skip a single step.
I want everything with her, and I want it to be right.
But it’s…scary, I think. The uncertainty.
What if she doesn’t stay? What if Boston really is temporary for her and she leaves? ”
“Then you go with her,” Jordan says, immediately. “If that’s what she wants.”
“Is that what you would have done?” I ask him.
He nods. “I would have. If Jo had needed to be in Pittsburgh, I would have gone back in a heartbeat.”
“Even though you wanted to be here?”
He shrugs. “I didn’t want anything more than I wanted her. Everything else was negotiable.”
My dad reaches across the table and lays a hand over mine.
“He’s right, Noah. If what’s between you and Hannah is real, that’s what matters.
Everything else is just details. And if you really love her, which I think you do, then you’ll give her the time she needs to figure out what she wants, and you’ll support her no matter what it is. ”
“I just want her to be happy.” I feel the stark truth of the words the second they’re out of my mouth.
“I want her to be so, so happy. The happiest girl in the world. I don’t want anything more than I want that.
I want to be the one to make her happy, and if I don’t have what she needs, then I’ll do my best to find it for her.
No matter what and no matter where.” I exhale heavily and run my fingers over the ring in my pocket, feeling a weight I didn’t realize I was carrying lift off my shoulders, my to-do list narrowed down to one single item.
Make Hannah happy .
It’s already my favorite thing to do, and I think I’m pretty good at it.
My dad smiles at me. “You’re going to do just fine.”
I grin at him, feeling light as air. “I am, aren’t I?”
“There he is,” Cooper says, the corner of his mouth kicking up in what seems to pass for a smile for him tonight. “Humble as always.”
“Eh, let him have this one,” Elliot says, sliding another beer across the table to me. “He loves the girl. We’ve all been there.”
“Not me.” Cooper shakes his head. “I’ll pass on the whole happily ever after thing, thank you very much.”
Jordan snorts. “Yeah, right. You’re just saying that now because you’re locked into some kind of weird power struggle at work and can’t think outside of it.
But when you’re not a miserable BigLaw associate, you’re the most sensitive and intuitive of us.
I bet you fall harder and faster than all three of us combined. ”
“I second that,” I say, raising my hand.
“Third.” Elliot grins at Cooper, who is rolling his eyes at all of us.
“I’ll take that bet,” my dad says. “Cece’s been saying for a while that your time is coming, Coop, and far be it from me to disagree with her.”
Cooper scoffs. “I don’t have time for that shit. I’ll leave the falling for these three assholes.” He gestures at the three of us. “And if we’re done with the feelings portion of the evening, can we throw some axes?”
“Fuck yes,” I say, bouncing up from my chair. “I’m so in.”
My brothers get up, too, and head to the axes, but before I can follow them, my dad hands me my phone with a wink. “Check in with your girl but hide the evidence. If Cooper catches you, I’m telling him you stole it.”
I laugh, taking the phone from him. “Deal. Thanks, Dad.”
“Proud of you, Noah. I’m really, really proud of you.” He squeezes my shoulder and heads over to my brothers. A rush of warmth fills me at his words as I unlock my phone and start typing.
Me
Hey, Han, how’s girls’ night?
Hannah
The best everrrrrr. So drunk. I wrote a spicy scene on my phone right here on Cece’s couch.
Me
Fuck yes, you did. Send it over.
Hannah
You wish. Maybe I’ll let you read it one day.
Me
Maybe you can read it to me one day.
Hannah
Why do I like that idea?
Me
Because it’s the best idea ever.
Hannah
I think it might be. I miss your face. It’s my favorite face.
Me
Everything about you is my favorite.
Hannah
I like you, Noah. I really, really like you.
Me
I like you right back, Gorgeous.
Setting my phone down on the table, I join my brothers and my dad to toss some axes, smile on my face the whole damn time.