Page 16 of Just About a Rake (Ladies Who Dare #5)

Three days later, the March Ball

T hings were changing.

Leonora could feel it in her bones.

Heart hadn’t been home since the day of the boxing match. That was to say, he came to shoot glares at her every evening, but for the most part, he’d been absent.

Which was very suspect.

Especially since Harriet had confirmed that the duchess hadn’t attended any events since then either. Leonora pursed her lips in thought. It should bother her more, yet remarkably, she felt rather unbothered by it all.

Heart was her father. The duchess, she was pretty certain, was her mother. And she had no doubt that those two had matters they needed to hash out, hurts they had to forgive. Perhaps that was what they were both up to. And then there was Leonora herself. She wondered how they would approach the topic of her. Would they divulge their past to her? Would they attempt to keep their secret?

She gave a light snort, stuffing another lemon cake in her mouth.

With Dare unraveling her secret, and the night she’d spent with him talking until her eyelids could no longer win the battle, one thing had become clear—she didn’t want to be ruined by a secret she’d had no hand in creating. She had spent too many years living from moment to moment, each one precious, knowing it could all be taken from her at any time. Tonight, though, she wanted to seize one more moment for herself—a moment where she could start a secret of her own creation. One away from the shadows of the one she had inherited.

She wanted to seize Dare.

And she wanted to seize him tonight.

If she didn’t do it tonight, Leonora had a feeling that the chance might slip away forever. She wanted that chance. She wanted it like nothing she had ever wanted in her life.

I won’t let you go tonight, Dare.

She scanned the room, looking for her quarry. If Dare saw her now, he would probably tease her that she was searching for the duchess, never dreaming that tonight her target was him.

There. She spotted him across the ballroom, her face splitting into a grin as their eyes met. The possibility existed that he would refuse the moment she wanted from him, but Leonora didn’t dwell on the answer she might not receive from him. The best she could do was try.

And she was looking forward to trying.

Very much.

She winked at him and turned on her heel, striding from the ballroom. She knew Lord and Lady March’s residence like the palm of her hand, having visited with her parents as a young girl enough times to have discovered every nook and cranny.

Her goal: the library.

Whether Dare would follow or not remained to be seen. She slipped from the room quite effortlessly. She quickly padded to the library on light feet. She had attended tonight with Harriet, but she’d told her friend not to worry about her, for she had some mischief up her sleeve.

Poking her head through the door, she breathed a sigh of relief when nobody was present. She glanced back down the hall and flashed a smile at a familiar person’s urgent approach. She slipped into the room with a chuckle.

Books filled the space from the floor right up to the ceiling in a magnificent display of knowledge and imagination.

“Leonora.” His voice was low, hesitant.

She turned, a slow smile curving her lips. The suspicion in his gaze only made her laugh softly. “You came.”

“What are you up to now?”

She stepped deeper into the library. “Close the door.”

His brows furrowed. “Why?”

“Because I am tempting you.”

“You do that every damn day,” he muttered under his breath but still closed the door. “And should you really be doing that? Purposely tempting me?”

“Yes, I think I should.” And so much more. “Why, don’t you think so?”

He leaned back against the door, staring at her. “I can list out reasons upon reasons why it’s wrong.”

She laughed. “Please don’t. I’m sure I wouldn’t enjoy them.”

“They’re not meant to be enjoyed. They are meant to inform.”

“I don’t want to be informed.” She wandered over to a shelf and trailed a finger over the spine of a book, keeping her eyes locked on him. “I want to tempt. Will you allow yourself to be tempted?”

His eyes burned into hers. “I don’t think you know who you are tempting.”

A thrill shot through Leonora. Didn’t she? She begged to differ. “Rake Sloane, infamous rake, also the Earl of Dare.”

He pushed off from the door, a slight chuckle escaping him. “Hearing it like that is quite disconcerting. It’s as if my parents wanted me to be immoral.”

“It is a rather ironic coincidence, don’t you think?” She cocked her head to the side, biting her lips before saying, “My point is, Dare, I know exactly who you are. I know your reputation.”

He stopped before her, those blue pools almost brooding as they studied her. “Yes. I do have a dark reputation, but you do not.”

“I don’t care about that,” Leonora said boldly. He couldn’t scare her no matter what he said. “I’m here to create a secret moment of my own.”

One brow arched, the air between them thickening. “Is that why you want this? Because of your family secret?”

“If I’m going to be ruined, I shall not be ruined by a family secret.”

He reached out to grasp her chin. “Then by what will you be ruined?”

“You.”

The word hung between them like a challenge. A promise.

“A dangerous statement, Lady Leonora.”

“It shall be a secret.” She stepped into him, her chin lifting to hold his gaze. “Our secret.”

“And what will your future husband think about this secret of ours?”

“Probably the same thing he would think if he discovered the other secret.” Her fingers caught his. “I have thought about nothing but this for three long days. I don’t want to live with regret. I might not know what the future holds, but I do know that tonight shall hold. Us. Fused together.”

“Christ, Leonora...” His voice cracked on her name. She heard what he didn’t say. I can’t be reformed.

But she didn’t want his reformation.

She just wanted him.

She laughed and turned to saunter over to the shelf on her left, shooting a sidelong glance at him. “What if I told you in order to help me keep my secret, you must ruin me. Would you help me then?”

“I’d tell you it was the most ridiculous line a woman has ever tossed at me.”

“What if I told you I will be ruined tonight, even if you walk out that door?”

His face lost all expression. “Don’t tempt a rake, Leonora.” His voice turned thick. “My self-control isn’t as strong as you might imagine. And I am no gentleman.”

“You keep calling yourself a rake, but I have yet to see the proof.” She lifted a taunting brow. “Or is the title nothing but a mask you wear?”

His gaze grew hot. “Even if I were to ravage you to ruin, I wouldn’t do it here where anyone could walk in on us.”

Leonora grinned. “You wouldn’t be doing it here.” She reached out to a book and tilted it down, the shelf before her creaking as it slowly swung open.

His eyes widened in disbelief. “A secret room.”

“A secret reading room to be exact.”

He strode over, peering inside. “How do you know about this place?”

Leonora flashed a proud smile. She’d caught his interest. “I know a thing or two as well.”

Dark, turbulent blue eyes met hers. “You did think this through.”

“I didn’t decide the terms of my birth, Dare. No infant can. But I can decide my own source of ruination, and I refuse to let it be my birth. I don’t expect you to understand, but I’m a walking ruin already. I’m just asking you to do what rakes do best—ravage. Do you dare, Lord Dare?”

His reply came instant, “God, yes.” Then he cursed. “I’ve never seduced an innocent before. I don’t know if I can be gentle. I don’t know if I can be whatever you need me to be.”

A thrill shot up her spine. “I don’t need you to be gentle. I just need you to be you.”

“Now you are only provoking me.” He suddenly reached over to pick her up and toss her over his shoulder.

A gasp flew from her lips. “Dare! What are you doing?”

“Ravaging an innocent.” He stepped into the room, which was a smaller version of the library, only it had no windows. Rows of books lined the walls, and plush carpets adorned the floor. In the corner stood a desk with candles and a tinderbox.

He set her down. “This is pure madness, you know this.”

“Then let’s be mad together.”

He tucked a curl behind her ear. “I shall light some candles. By the time the last one is lit, if you are still here, there will be no going back.”

Oh, Leonora didn’t plan to go back.

Only forward.

Leonora pressed the door shut with a click , sealing them inside. Her pulse thrummed. No escape. No second thought. Only ruin.

*

Could a man die if his heart raced too quickly?

If that were possible, Dare was in trouble. Deep trouble. And yet, even though he knew he shouldn’t be doing this, he had still picked her up and walked into this secret room.

He was not strong enough to walk away.

He was not that good.

His temptress wanted him to ruin her, and he would oblige. Only, he couldn’t rid himself of the sense that he was the one about to be ruined tonight. She would ruin him. Not in any obvious way. No, what Leonora threatened was something far more dangerous. She would unravel him. Make him forget every carefully placed wall, every vow to keep his heart unattached. His life untangled.

Once he touched her, there would be no undoing it. No forgetting the way she looked at him now—like he was something more than a rake, more than a man who played at seduction but never truly surrendered to it. She was toying with disaster, but so was he. And Dare had the terrible feeling that when the dust settled, he would be the one left in wreckage.

But only if he didn’t keep his wits about him.

He was still a rake.

Hardened.

Flickering light illuminated the room in a soft orange glow. Illuminating her in a soft orange glow.

“I want to kiss you.” Christ, he was holding on by a thread, but he also didn’t want to make any sudden moves.

She laughed, and a slender arm reached out to him. “So kiss me.”

He placed his hand in hers, jolting when a sizzling spark exploded between them. His calm shattered. His lips found hers right about the moment his chest burst into a flurry of wild, unforgivable beats—half panic and half daze.

His tongue coaxed hers while his mind and his heart battled each other.

Dear God, had he developed feelings for her? Feelings that poets would start with a L and end with an E ?

No, Dare couldn’t accept such a thing. And yet he couldn’t stop wanting her. She called forth emotions inside him he had believed long dead.

It was intoxicating.

He pulled away from her, breaking their kiss, searching her face. His whole body erupted in flames at her unfocused countenance. They had no future. A man like him... He could not give her what a woman like her deserved—happiness. For life. Even if he could give her all of it, all of himself, it would be a broken fragment, the last shard left of a long line of broken Dare men. Nothing in him was whole. Nothing in him deserved her.

He didn’t deserve her.

If he had any moral scruples left in him, he would walk away. Walk away and never turn his head to her again. But even while he didn’t deserve her, neither could he resist her.

Hell and damnation.

What should he do?

Ravage her without regret. And whatever flutters pushed against his chest, he would keep to himself. He had no qualms about asking his heart to suffer in silence. He was used to it. Yearning, longing for something he didn’t understand—it was second nature.

“Dare?”

Yes . “Call me Rake.”

She hesitated only a fraction of a second before she murmured, smiling, “Rake.”

His name on her lips. God save him, there lay the trouble. The simple sound of it—his name, from her—had the power to undo everything he was trying to keep together. His lips found hers again, pouring into the kiss all the things he would never, ever speak out loud.

He loved her.

Dear God, he loved her.

He loved her so damn much. But being the man that he was, his moral compass about good and bad was skewed at best. Even if she pleaded for his affection, begged for his responsibility, noble sacrifice was not within his scope of being.

He was no hero.

Would never be.

Her hands found his face. Dare almost growled when she pulled back and breathed, “Your turn.”

His turn?

She grinned at him, planting a soft kiss on his lips before drawing back again. “Say my name.”

“Leonora.” Her name left his lips before he could stop himself. “Leonora.”

Damn near a plea.

Her hands circled his neck. “My arms just broke out in gooseflesh.”

“Christ, Leonora. Are we really doing this?” Was he really doing this? This was about the only resistance Dare could manage. The only words he could utter to appease the conflicting desires within him. He wanted her. Badly. He also didn’t want to taint her with his shadows.

“A rake is this hesitant? Should I beg?” She chuckled. “Beg a rake?”

“I’m also still just a man.” Who doesn’t want to hurt you yet cannot let you go.

“And I am also just a woman.”

“An innocent one. A smart one.”

“Well, then, since I’m so clever,” she pressed her bosom against his chest, “you cannot question my choices.”

He should have seen that coming. Ah, this woman. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Who are you hurting?” Her grin turned suggestive. “Surely not me?”

Ah yes. He couldn’t hurt her because she didn’t feel the same way for him...

He leaned close to inhale the scent of her skin. “I promised myself, when it came to you, that I wouldn’t do anything I’d regret.” Anything I’d need forgiveness for.

“How funny, Dare.” Her hands framed his face. “So just don’t regret.” One of her hands dropped to trail a finger over his jaw. “I certainly won’t regret anything that happens in this room, trust me.”

He captured her wrist, searching her gaze. She didn’t move, merely stared at him with bright eyes, allowing him to see all the truth reflected there.

That small hint of encouragement was enough for any last resistance to crumble. He loved her. He loved her in a way that defied reason. He loved her in a way he had never loved any woman in all his life. And he couldn’t give her forever, but he could give her tonight.

He brought her wrist up to his lips, brushing a gentle kiss against her hand, a silent promise. “No regrets, then.”

Her smile took on a new light, a sultry one. “No regrets,” she agreed.

“You will be the end of me, you know?”

“I know.” She leaned into him, saying like a true seductress, “That has never been my intention, but it might just become it.”

“What has been your intention?”

“With you?” Her tongue darted out to lick her lips, sending a shiver to the base of his spine. “I don’t rightly know.”

He chuckled. “Now, that, little temptress, I do believe. I also don’t know what I’m doing half the time either, especially where you are involved.”

“Then let’s not know together.”

But I do know more than you, temptress. “But—”

She cut him off with a finger over his lips, both teasing and commanding at the same time. “That word, or similar, is not allowed in this space.”

He kissed her finger. “I was merely going to say that I do know something. You shall now be thoroughly ravaged.”

“ Finally .” Her arms circled his body, squeezing. “For this night,” she said, “you are mine.”

Christ. “Leonora . . .”

“You don’t like me saying it.”

“I bloody love it.” He lowered his head until his lips touched her ear. “There are many types of love I can give you,” he whispered. “But true love...”

No hesitance. “I’m not asking for true love. I’m just asking for your love, for one night, this night.”

Ah, hellfire.

Never in his wildest, most erotic musings had he imagined that Leonora would ever offer him such a gift. The gift to taste her. To love her. To pleasure her. It had always just been a distant whisper, and unspoken desire.

They were never supposed to become friends.

They weren’t supposed to become lovers.

But for this night, she was his. He would love her. For this night only. As for the rest...

That was for tomorrow to decide.