Page 107 of Je T'aime, Actually

“Yeah,” Monroe said, waving her off.

Slowly, Poppy stood and moved towards the door. Her hand hovered on the handle before she turned back. “Come on.”

Monroe sighed but set her phone down and followed. The kids barely noticed.

Out in the corridor, Poppy smiled. “So…want to talk about it?” When Monroe stayed silent, she added, “You know you can’t get anything past me, right? That’s why I’m your best friend.”

Monroe’s arms dropped to her sides in quiet surrender. “This isn’t the time to be worrying about—”

“It’s the perfect time,” Poppy said firmly. “You’re still as important as anyone else in my life. Frank’s… Frank. I can’t control that. He’ll wake up and then we’ll deal with it. The kids are fine, thanks to you and Chloé. And I could honestly do with something else to think about. So…tell me. What’s up?”

“I guess…” She sighed. “I got used to having Chloé around.”

“She’ll be back.”

Monroe nodded, but her expression didn’t match the reassurance.

“And if she isn’t,” Poppy added gently, “then you’ll be back to her soon enough.” She caught the flicker that passed across Monroe’s face. “Are you having problems again?”

“What? No. God, no. Nothing like that. I just—” She exhaled. “Being back here…around the kids, around you…I realise I miss it. I miss all of you more than I really considered I would.”

“You don’t like living in France?”

Monroe smiled. “I love France. I love our life there. I’m slowly making friends and learning the language, and that’s helped, but—” She winced. “It’s not here.”

Poppy nodded. “Does Chloé know how you feel?”

She laughed at herself. “No. In all honesty, I don’t think I even realised until right now.”

Poppy tilted her head. “Well, that makes sense. Sometimes you only know what something means to you once you’ve stepped away from it.”

She reached out and touched Monroe’s arm. “You don’t have to have it all figured out today. But maybe…let her in on it? She’s not a mind reader either.”

Monroe gave a faint smile but didn’t reply.

Poppy squeezed her arm gently. “You’ve been holding space for everyone else. Maybe it’s time you made a little room for yourself too.”

“I’m going to, I just—”

The door swung open. Kitty’s face appeared, eyes wide with excitement. “Daddy’s awake!”

Poppy moved quickly to the door but paused just before pushing it open. She turned back to Monroe, her voice low, steady. “Whatever happens, you’ll find the right answers. You always do.”

Then she slipped into the room, leaving Monroe standing alone for a moment, the words settling like a hand on her back.

ninety-one

Frank was awake.

Not fully present, his eyes drifted in and out of focus, his words slurred and soft, but there was awareness behind the blinks. He squeezed Poppy’s hand when she leant in to speak. His gaze followed Kitty as she paced the foot of the bed, blue frosting still clinging to the corner of her mouth. He smiled faintly when Benji said his name.

Monroe stood back, letting the others crowd close. The nurse had said not to expect clarity yet. The pain would cloud him. The medication would fog everything else. But still, he was here.

Breathing.

Responding.

Alive.