Page 82 of Intermission

“I see what you’re saying.” He nods. “Do we ‘hold on’ by doing as your parents wish, not seeing each other until they give us the thumbs up? Or do we ‘hold on’ and keep doing what we’re doing, going against them, trusting that God will show them the truth about me—about us—in the meantime?”

“Exactly! And I have no idea which one it is.”

“Me neither.” He puts his hands on his thighs and rubs them to his knees and back a few times, hard. “Sometimes I wonder if maybe I’m telling God what I want him to do more than I’m asking him what I should do. But the one thing Idoknow is that I—”

Noah’s voice chokes up. He clears his throat, and his hand finds mine again.

“I know I love you, Madeleine Faith. Iloveyou. And I love knowing that you love me, too.” He takes a breath and squeezes my hand. “I loveus. If God is telling you—no, telling us—to hold on, well, that’s something worth holding on to, isn’t it? Even if we don’t exactly know what it means.”

I can’t speak, but I don’t need to. When I scoot to Noah’s side, he puts his arm around me and pulls me even closer than before. The posture feels right. Good.

We fit together. We make sense when nothing else does.

Why can’t Mom just give us a chance?

“But at the same time, I question it.”

What?

Noah takes a deep breath in through his nose and exhales just as slowly. “These last few months, I’ve spent a lot more time thinking aboutyouthan thinking aboutGod.”

“That’s a little ironic.” I expel a tiny snort. “Before I met you, I barely gave God any thought at all. Now I actually listen to the words of the hymns at church. I pay attention to the sermon instead of doodling all over the program. Well, most of the time, anyway. I’m even in a Bible study now, thanks to you, and I’ve learned so much from it. Well, Iwasin a Bible study.” I let a little growl-sound escape. “But since Mom doesn’t want me hanging out with people from your church anymore, I guess that’s over. At least for—”

“About that,” Noah interrupts. “Sorry. I kind of saw that one coming. I hope you don’t mind, but I did a little digging for you, and it turns out that the youth group at First Church of Kanton sponsors a girls’ Bible study on Saturday mornings. About three girls go, I guess, so it’s not as big as what you’re used to, but it’s something.”

“Really?” I’ve never heard anything about it. Then again, when your family only attends church on religious holidays, you kind of fall out of the loop. “Maybe I’ll check it out.”

I can’t see how Mom could object. It’s our family church. And—bonus!—that Noah Spencer character doesn’t go there.

“Most guys would rather have me study their fantasy football league charts than the Bible. You’ve taught me so much. You’re such a good example of what a Christian should be. I wish they understood that.”

My words are meant to encourage, but a fresh tension stiffens his frame.

“A good example would not cause you to sin by meeting you behind your parents’ backs. That’s not much of an example, Faith.”

“Noah—”

“The Bible says to honor your parents. Obey your parents. And I’m leading you into disobedience just by showing up.”

“You didn’t know—”

“I suspected. And when I found out, it wasn’t like I turned the car around and took you home, was it?”

I tilt my gaze to the sky. “No offense, God, but being a Christian sure makes it hard to be a human being. This totally bites.”

“Yes, it does.” Noah laughs, and his posture relaxes.

“I bet this is one of those times you wish you had a direct line to Heaven like everybody seems to think a missionary’s kid should, huh?”

“You know it. But the truth of it is that we’re the only people who know what we have and haven’t done. I know that I love you, and I want to honor your love for me. And God knows that, too.”

“I wish he’d set a bush on fire or something and tell my mom.”

“Me, too. Sometimes I think the best thing would be for us to keep our distance until your parents agree to meet me. Maybe it would be easier, maybe there would be less opportunity to sin, if we stoppedseeing each other.”

“But Noah, I—We...” Panic constricts my chest, halting my airflow.

Noah squeezes my shoulder. “The Bible says Christians should avoid even theappearanceof sin. Sneaking around behind your parents’ backs implies we have something to hide, even if we’re not doing what people mightassumewe’re doing.”